So I guess I might have the feeling that some people, when they try to do, I guess we all have some trauma in our background, but if it's of a certain level and I watch myself or someone else try to observe their intention and they don't seem to be able to do it, I often would recommend that they put that aside for a while and just try to relax with the intentions that are happening, but not look at them. More like relax with them and just let them be. Except that they're having a function, work on relaxing. Then, when more calm, then we may be able to look. Eventually, looking at them is tranquilizing too. But at the beginning, looking at them is a little bit more active than just relaxing with them. I must admit, I think I need to understand more about trauma.

[01:07]

I noticed my stories have a kind of a hierarchical structure. That's a story, too. Yeah, it's a story, too. I can look at other people, and some people, there's a sickness and illness as a constant theme in their life, and that doesn't happen to be the case with me. The theme of sickness and illness is not part of your story? Not in the same way. Oh, for some other people, yes. Yeah. Illness and health. Yes. notice that the underlying themes of my stories seem to be less visible to me. That it's easier to become a little more aware of, gee, right now, oh, I feel I'm going to impress someone. Or right now, I'm feeling kind of needed. And I sense that somehow, if I can get underneath that and understand more truly the theme of it,

[02:14]

that to be aware of not only the theme, but all the stories that come from that. Right. And then that what you just said is another cognitive construction. Yes. And if you watch that, that'll be good. But if you get into it, then you're kind of like losing track of the practice. So, I take it what you're saying, the point is to have a constant awareness of the story without trying to figure it out. Of course, you have awareness of the story. Now, figuring it out. Now, if you then get figuring it out without noticing another mental construction, then the practice has just slipped away. In other words, you got caught now by this sort of new improved version of intention.

[03:25]

So you can have intentions and you can feel, and the intention can include a sense that this awareness of this intention is not very deep. That's also part of this intention. You have a picture of your relationship with people, plus part of the picture is this is a superficial representation. That's also part of it. Then to think, oh, I'd like to go deeper. That's fine. That's another opportunity. That's not the practice, though. That's just another mental construction, which can be observed like the previous one. This is superficial. Here's the picture. It's superficial. Okay, fine. I want to go deeper, this is a new one, which applies to the old one, but anyway, it's a new one. But then to get caught up in that is just to get caught up in your karma or your mental construction without studying it and realizing that you are actually, this is the activity of your mind operating now.

[04:30]

Usually people are caught up with the activity of mind. They're not aware of it, that it's an experiment, that the mind is kind of in a sense of a hope, the current stories and when I listen to you talk I see people I sense I have a story that they're with the story and then they make up another story and then they get caught by the story and they're not with the story anymore I have a sense of them being dislocated from the creative process and just being swept away by it at least for the moment Like this is a story, but figuring it out isn't a story. Did you say ah? So then if you're aware it's a story, that's good. And not even saying it's a story, but just aware of it.

[05:37]

This is provisional. This is a way of coping here. And now I'm going to figure it out, but not noticing that's just another one. But that's a more subtle one. So then you don't get caught by that one. Then a more subtle one comes. So more and more subtle versions are offered to those who understand the gross ones. So your reward for not being caught by a gross story is a more subtle story, which then you get caught by and stop realizing its provisional nature, its tentative offering, its coping quality. and the practice temporarily is lost. Is it inherently frustrating to do this? No, it's not inherently frustrating, but it is essentially liberating. But if you want to be good at it right away, it would be frustrating. I'm going to learn this quickly.

[06:38]

That would set the frustration. And the storytelling is by nature frustrating because the storytelling is not by nature frustrating if at the moment of telling you know it's a story. It becomes frustrating when you forget it's a story and start holding on to it. So telling stories is okay if you let go of them. That's happiness, is telling stories and letting go. Experiencing, making stories of our experience and not being caught by them leads to understanding our experience. That's happiness. But having experience, which we have, telling the stories which we do, and holding on to them, that's unhappiness. And it has consequence to cause further hobbling of our study and further frustration. Studying the process is liberating. Having a story of how it should go will contribute to frustration. But again, having a story of how it'll go just as a tentative thing and then let go of it, that's fun.

[07:44]

It is now, according to my watch, getting close to 1240 when I'm asked to stop around 1240 so that the people in this retreat can have lunch. And we apologize to the guests for not giving you lunch today. Please forgive us. Do you forgive us? Just don't let it happen again. It won't happen again for a year. Huh? They can't even come. You don't get fed and you also can't come unless you join the session. So now we're going to have a lot of people join the session, but you don't care. So go see if you want to join the session. We'll now have a lot of discussion. And it's delicious food. Even better than... It's terrific, you know.

[08:51]

And plus, we have really nice waiters. What? What did you say? We have door prizes. We've got a lot of stuff here. No choice of menu, did you say? Well, shall we eat then? Thank you for coming and being so alert and open-minded about this storytelling.

[09:25]

@Transcribed_UNK
@Text_v005
@Score_85.41