Tonight is the last night of our mountains and rivers retreat and at the beginning I asked people in the retreat to consider what their primary intention was and I wasn't clear whether everyone agreed or not but perhaps there was almost agreement that the primary intention was to be free and for all living beings to be free, free from suffering, free to live a life of

[01:04]

compassion and love in this world of busyness. So there are lots of wonderful teachings and even within Buddhism there's many many wonderful teachings but in a sense it's good to decide what's going to be your primary teaching you're going to work with. So I guess we could say well and my primary intention will be to learn the way of the Buddha, to study the way of the Buddha.

[02:11]

In the Zen school to study the way of the Buddha means to study the self. Means to learn about the self and to learn about the self so thoroughly that you forget all about the self, that you're liberated from the self, liberated from body and mind and that everyone else is also liberated from body and mind. This is one way of saying what it means to study the Buddha way. Also in

[03:23]

this temple, in this monastery, to study the Buddha way means to study Zazen. To learn the Buddha way means to learn what Zazen is. And again Zazen is just like the Buddha way, it is to study yourself, to learn yourself, to become intimate with yourself and forget about yourself. So here the Buddha way and Zazen are the same and usually Zen practitioners set the Buddha way, set Zazen as the same thing in the center of their heart and make it their highest priority. Another way to say this is to change the word learn or study to model. When we say

[04:50]

to learn the Buddha way we can also say to study the Buddha way, we can also say to model the Buddha way. So to model the Buddha way is to model the self on the self and to model so completely that you forget the self. So both in Zen and in other schools of the Buddha way it is recommended that you not study and practice lots of different ways but just learn thoroughly and understand thoroughly one way and all the different ways are really just one way and that

[05:52]

one way if you practice that one way all the qualities of Buddha will be in the palm of your hand and that one way is simply the way of great compassion. And again to study yourself, to become intimate with yourself and to forget yourself is another way to say great compassion. To study yourself so thoroughly that you change completely without any manipulation you're just completely transformed with no device just being exactly what you are you're completely liberated. But it's very difficult to

[07:05]

change the mind of living beings, it's very difficult to change our mind, it's very difficult to change the mind of others. But still from the beginning from the first little speck of trying to practice Buddha's way of trying to learn Buddha's way we should keep changing the mind of self and others and to change the mind of self and others the place to start is with the practice of giving or to say another way the place to start the practice of modeling the self on the self the place to start practicing

[08:12]

Buddha's way the place to start practicing great compassion the way to start practicing zazen is with the practice of giving. Giving is the first of the perfections of the bodhisattva so what's giving? Usually people have some idea of giving but giving in this sense is again the first access to being yourself. If you study giving closely you will see that in accepting a body in accepting a mind and in giving up a body or giving up a mind both of those are giving. To let your body be your body is giving.

[09:34]

To leave the Buddha way to the Buddha way is attaining the Buddha way and is giving. To leave your breakfast to let your breakfast be your breakfast is giving and that is the first way that is how to start transforming the minds of living beings and that is the first way to change and transform your own mind. The

[10:44]

usual way people think of changing or the usual ways that people think of changing are not like this. I don't mean to make fun of the usual ways that people try to change but they're not like this they're more like at breakfast time eat a little less or eat a little more than usual or have a little less or a little bit more salt. Chew a little faster or chew a little slower rather than first of all letting your breakfast be your breakfast. Now don't get me wrong I think it's really good to chew your food really well.

[12:09]

I recommend it. But before I get into the practice of chewing thoroughly I want to mention that the first way the first step is to start with the way you're chewing now and let the way you're chewing now be the way you're chewing now that's how to start changing your mind. That's giving. That's the beginning. Let your pain be pain. That's giving. That's the beginning of changing your mind and also that demonstrates giving to others. If people can see you giving

[13:18]

in this way, if they can see you giving your body, letting your body be your body and you and you're in the presence of others who can see you doing this they can feel that you're doing this. There is a subtle communication of you being willing to be you. They can feel it. It encourages others to do the same. In other words you start to help others to change. To change yourself and others from being so concerned about ourselves. To change from being so serious about ourselves. We're so serious about ourselves we can hardly believe that that's all we have to do is let ourselves be ourselves.

[14:20]

There must be more to it than that. Even though logically it's impossible for them to be more than that, because we take ourselves so seriously we can hardly believe that things are that simple. But to let things be that simple starts to relieve us from this conceit about ourselves. Again if we have one concern, the concern of great compassion, this is the way to start. This is the way to change our breakfast into truth. This is

[15:31]

the way to change our body into truth. Because when you let your body be your body, when you give your body to your body, your body turns into the truth. Giving transforms your thoughts in the truth. But again this requires, to do this kind of practice usually requires that we set the highest priority as practicing the Buddha way, practicing great compassion. Without that kind of priority it's hard to do such a, be so simple and to do such an ordinary thing as to allow a flower on a hill to be the flower on a hill. It's

[16:59]

a very simple thing. Another way to get into this is exemplified. I can get a little iconographical here. It's exemplified by the Buddha as being represented by the, what do you call it, the personification of the Buddha's activity in terms of three great enlightenment workers. One of them is called the regarder of the cries of the world. The one who listens to the cries of all beings in the world, that one. That one

[18:16]

rides a peacock. Peacock feathers have all those eyes on them. To see and hear the cries of the world, including your own pain, just to listen and let your pain be your pain. Just to listen to the pain of others and to let it be the pain. Next is the enlightenment worker called pleasant splendor or sweetness and light. This bodhisattva rides a lion. This bodhisattva looks, looks deeply into the heart of suffering beings, into the heart of all things. And the third one is called universal goodness and that enlightenment

[19:21]

worker rides an elephant. And that one vows or intends all kinds of goodness. That one acts. So these three together are helpful in response to this busy world that we live in, full of so much suffering. First listen. Just listen. Then look deeply. And from this deep looking and all over universal listening, then express your vow. Act from there. Act, act, act.

[20:26]

I forgot how it came up, but today when I was hiking I was talking to Steve and he was telling me about the teaching of one of his Gestalt teachers, Dick Price, of contact, enter and express. It's kind of like that. Look, contact. Excuse me, listen, contact. Look, deeply, enter. And then express or act. But also vow because it's like there's an intention to act from this listening and this looking. So it's almost like you don't even really act. It's more like an expression of this. It's not like an action on top of anything. It's like you vow to act for the benefit of others, but before you can act for the benefit of others you have to listen and look.

[21:47]

Listen and look and then the vow expresses itself. You don't really have to do anything. The listening and looking then are expressed. From the point of view of Buddha, probably all of our expression is coming from listening and looking, but it's hard for us to understand that unless we consciously listen and look. So we make the vow of great compassion. We make the vow to benefit all others and then we practice listening and looking and then we express. And Steve also mentioned that another way of talking about this is trust process as a first

[23:02]

point. Like when you listen. Listening is a process. Just trust listening. Trust that listening saves beings. If you really listen, if you let the listening happen to you all the way, it really helps people. And the next thing is support process or stay with process. Enter. Look deeply. That supports the process. That supports the process. The last point was

[24:08]

get out of the way. And lately I've been using the expression stay close and do nothing. But actually maybe you should say first listen and then stay close to what you hear. Just stay close to the cries. Enter deeply. Get into it deeply and then don't do anything. But stay close. And again, not doing anything does not mean you don't do anything. Okay. If you stay close to somebody who is moving around, you got to move around with them. But you're not doing anything. You're not trying to get them to move this way or that way. If they go this way, you go that way. If they go that way, you go that way. You're not really doing anything. You're just staying close to them. You're just staying close. You hold hands and you walk through the water, the mud, you walk through

[25:17]

the woods, you walk through the mountains, you walk through the streams. You just hold hands and walk together. That's not doing anything. Do you understand? Does that make sense? That's not doing anything. Just staying close. If you stay close and get out of the way. You don't go away and get out of the way. You get out of the way right in front of the person. Right? It doesn't mean anything to people if you get out of the way and you're not there. What's impressive is you can sit right in front of somebody and get out of the way. You're there supporting their process. You trust it and you support it by getting out of the way. You stay close and get out of the way. You stay close and do nothing. You're rooting for them. You're hoping the best for them and yourself. You're hoping that

[26:24]

you'll do the best. You're hoping that you get out of the way, but you're not doing anything. Listening is not doing anything. Looking is not doing anything. Joining hands and walking together is not doing anything. This is just compassion. To let your breakfast be your breakfast, you got to be at breakfast. Got to know what it is to let it be what it is. You got to be there and look at it to see what it is before you can let it be that. When you let oatmeal of a certain temperature and consistency be oatmeal of a certain temperature and consistency, you are acknowledging it, going

[27:28]

deeply into it, and getting out of the way. Of course, it's the same with your pain and the pain of others. Pain is difficult to listen to, to acknowledge, to enter into, and not try to fix. You can warm up on oatmeal. Vowing to express and do something good in the morning and do something good in the afternoon, to ease some suffering in the morning and to relieve some pain in the afternoon. With that vow, with that intention, this listening and looking

[28:34]

can be expressed. And you can ease some pain, believe it or not. I propose to you, you can ease some pain by letting your salad be your salad. You can certainly ease your own pain and anxiety about what you've been served for lunch. You don't have to eat it, but before you touch it, you can already practice giving and change your mind. Now, when it's time to eat, I suggest you chew thoroughly. It's really good to chew thoroughly if you're going to eat. About a week ago at Green Gulch, at dinnertime, they had brown rice and stir-fried vegetables.

[29:39]

Vegetables were cauliflower and tofu and carrots and green and red peppers and onions. It was quite good, I thought. And I got a lot of brown rice and a lot of stir-fried vegetables, and I ate some brown rice and I ate some vegetables, and I ate some brown rice and I ate some vegetables. And when I eat brown rice, I chew brown rice very thoroughly. I've been doing that now for quite a long time. For almost 30 years, I've been chewing my brown rice thoroughly. It's one of the few things I do chew thoroughly. So I finish the vegetables before I finish the brown rice,

[30:43]

because I chew vegetables a little faster. And then I continue to, after I finish my stir-fried vegetables, I continue to chew the brown rice. And as often happens, some people even commented on how thoroughly I chew my brown rice. And then afterwards, after dinner, I was walking away from the dinner table up the stairs, and I mentioned to my wife, who was walking with me, that it was going to be a very happy evening from then on, because I had chewed my brown rice thoroughly. And because, ladies and gentlemen, when I chew my brown rice thoroughly, I don't just chew my

[31:57]

brown rice thoroughly and get good nutrition and all that. I also chew my suffering at the same time. It just comes right along with it. Just chewing that rice thoroughly, I chew also my pain thoroughly. And when I chew my pain thoroughly, along with my brown rice, and when I chew my impatience thoroughly, along with my brown rice, I get happier and happier. I don't try to get rid of my brown rice. I don't try to get rid of my suffering when I'm chewing my brown rice. I just chew my brown rice. As a matter of fact, I also don't try to slow down and prolong the chewing of my brown rice. Sometimes I get more later, but the stuff I'm eating now, I just chew it at the

[33:01]

normal, thorough rate. And when it's finished, I swallow it and have some more. The proper way of chewing brown rice is the proper way of coping with pain. It's the proper way to listen to people who are suffering. It's the proper way to enter into the process and support it. Just one bite after another. And I can go into some detail about how to bring the stuff from the back that isn't chewed up to the front and so on. But anyway, you can develop that skill so that you don't swallow any brown rice before it's thoroughly chewed. Well, maybe I will go into some detail. You know, if you chew that brown rice up really well and don't swallow it before it's really chewed, it gets, digested in the mouth, right? And also it gets broken down in all those little husks and stuff in there and all those little minerals that are in there. They get kind of broken loose from their

[34:06]

casement and so on. And they make this wonderful little, what do you call it? Material. So that when it goes down in your stomach, it goes through your stomach and it goes into your intestines and it goes down into the intestines and it goes into those little, what do they call it, villi? Huh? Would you say it louder please? Cilia. Cilia. It goes down in those little, those little tubes where you digest and it goes in there and it scours out all those little, all that little junk and cleans up your, all your kind of absorptive tissue. It's really good. It gets down there and it relates to all those years of laziness and misery that you've accumulated in your guts and cleans you out. Just like it cleans you out when you're chewing. I don't know if you believe what I'm saying, but I do. Unfortunately, I cannot do the same with white rice. I can't chew

[35:14]

it as slowly. It's one of the advantages of brown rice. White rice is a whole different thing. This kind of listening and looking deeply and expressing ourselves or acting out of this thing, it's just kind of really ordinary like that. It's like how you eat your dinner. It's like

[36:15]

how you walk down the street. It's really ordinary. It should be ordinary. I hope you can see how to make such a practice of the regarder of the cries of the world and the practice of looking deeply of the bodhisattva of pleasant splendor and this action of the bodhisattva of universal goodness. I hope you can see how these practices should be actually found in the way you live moment by moment. Also, that you allow yourself, that you entitle yourself to be able to discover these kinds of functionings of bodhisattvas like this, these great compassionate beings that you'd be able to see this kind of function happening

[37:17]

in everything you do all day long. And I also say to you, if you cannot do it, what do you lack? What's stopping you? What more permission do you need to feel this function coming through you all day long? I'd be happy to hear about any problems you have with this, because I think sometimes people don't give themselves permission to do that. They think, not me. This can't be. My eyes cannot be seeing like the bodhisattva of sweetness and light. My ears cannot be hearing so fully, so deeply, so universally that I'm saving beings just by

[38:18]

hearing. No, not me. Or this action cannot be the action of universal goodness. Not me. Must be something better than what I'm doing. It's also not to say that what you're doing isn't, either, to sort of identify with it and say, this is, this is. That my hearing is the hearing of Lokiteśvara. It's more, let it be. Allow it to be. Get out of the way. Don't make it that way. Just stay close and don't do anything and let it be. It's not something you're doing. It's the process. The process is coming through you. Buddha's wisdom is coming through you. If you can just let your ears hear it. Let your hearing allow it. Let your seeing allow it. Let this seeing allow it. Let this

[39:19]

acting allow it. Buddha never said you couldn't do that. Bodhisattvas never said, never, never discouraged you or said you were not permitted to think and feel that way. Only we stop ourselves and stop others. One time I. Sorry. It's okay. I'll be done in a minute. It's still not that long, is it? It's debatable. One time we had a sashi in San Francisco and in the middle, I was, I was there

[40:29]

and I was, I think I had the position of tanto or something, head of practice. And on the fifth day of sashi and I had to leave the, I had to leave the sashi in San Francisco and I flew to Minneapolis to do a wedding. On the fifth day, on the sixth day, on the fifth day I left, on the sixth day I did a wedding and the night of the sixth day I flew back to San Francisco and joined the sashi in again, seven day sashi and I joined it at night of the sixth day. And I heard that on the sixth day behind the, behind the meditation hall of the city center of San Francisco Zen Center, behind the meditation hall, there's an alley. It's called Lily Alley. And lots of men live out there on Lily Alley. Lots of young men. And on the sixth day,

[41:35]

for most of the afternoon, I guess, maybe the morning too, but for most of the afternoon I heard that the people who lived in the alley, one particular house, they were playing Aretha Franklin, very, very loud. And, and people in the sashi and got very upset because it was so loud. And when I got back, they told me about this. And the one person said, well, if Isan was here, he could have gone and talked to those people and got him to turn the music off. The reason why they said that was because those people back there that were playing the music were gay men and Isan was gay. And they thought since Isan was gay, he could go out there and talk

[42:36]

to them and get those gay men to stop making that terrible noise. And I thought, wait a minute, why can only a gay person do this? So I thought the next morning we'll listen. So we started meditation early in the morning as usual. We had two periods and there was no music. We had breakfast and no music. So I thought, well, let's just see. They play it. And during the break after breakfast, they started playing it. So when I came into the meditation hall for the first period of meditation after breakfast, the music was going very loud. I don't remember if it was Aretha Franklin again or not. But anyway, this was the seventh day of Session. It was a Sunday morning, hot weather for San Francisco. So I went out to talk to the people about it to see if I could get them to turn the music either

[43:41]

off or down. And I was dressed in my black robes, right? And my usual haircut. So I went over to where the music was and I went, I knocked on the door and a guy came downstairs and he said, yeah. I said, I wondered if you could turn the music down. And he said, it's not my record player. The guy who's playing the music is up the street. So you can go talk to him about it. So I turned up the street, started walking up the street and I saw this guy coming down the street. And there was truly a moment of real recognition between us. Because we were both wearing black dresses.

[44:45]

He didn't have a shaved head though. And also another difference in our apparel was that I didn't have a choke chain, I mean a choke necklace around with the studs on it. He did. So we walked up to him and I said, I said, would you please turn the music down? And he said, I'll not only turn it down, I'll turn it off. And he gave me a big kiss. And he said, happy gay parade. It was gay parade that day. That's why he was dressed up too. And I also told him that I could still feel the kiss on my lips. So anyway, I, it's very ordinary, really. Just listen, look and express yourself.

[46:06]

That's all. All it takes is 100% of your life. No more, no less. You've got 100%? You have anything better to use it for? No, I don't think so. But I guess we think, I don't know, what do we think? Too much trouble or something? Anyway, we have our various reasons to hold back. But what's your priority? You said it. Not me. I set my own. What's your priority? If it's to realize the Buddha way and to practice great compassion, then that's all there is.

[47:08]

And there's no, that's it. So as soon as possible, please decide what you want to do for the rest of your life. And I'd be happy to hear if you can decide what it is. Oh, let's sing a song. Okay. I've been, I want to sing a song. Okay, ready? Exhale. Inhale. When the red, red robin comes bobbing along, along, there'll be no more sobbing when he starts throbbing his own sweet song. Wake up, wake up, you sleepy head, get up,

[48:12]

get up, get out of bed, cheer up, cheer up, the sun is red. Live, love, laugh and be happy. Though I've been blue, now I'm walking through fields of flowers. Rain may glisten, but still I listen for hours and hours. I'm just a kid again, doing what I did again, singing a song. When the red, red robin comes bob, bob, bobbing along, bop, bop, bop, bopping along. May our intention equally penetrate every being and place

[49:14]

with the true merit of Buddha's way.

[49:22]

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