In the Lotus Sutra at the end of the chapter on the Bodhisattva of Infinite Compassion, it says, compassionate eyes observe sentient beings. happiness accumulated in ocean beyond measure. Just sitting here in this room in the midst of your life situation, breathing mindfully, this compassion will naturally arise for yourself.

[01:29]

Martin Buber said that in the eyes of a wild animal there is a great language, a language of anxiety, of the stirrings of the creature. between the realms of plant-like security and spiritual risk. When a Zen student sits

[03:22]

with the sensations of body and mind, there is a stirring there too, the anxiety of moving between the realms of plant-like security and spiritual risk. When Master Ma was about to die, the director of the monastery came and said, how is your venerable health, sir? And Master Ma said, sun-faced Buddha, moon-faced Buddha.

[04:31]

Quite a while later, there appeared a monk named Sway Du Thorn. Thorny Sway Du, they called him. He was a great poet, and one day his song of anxiety was, Sun-faced Buddha, moon-faced Buddha. What kind of people were the ancient emperors of China? For 20 years, I've suffered bitterly. How many times have I gone down into

[05:49]

the cave of the green dragon for you. This distress deserves recounting. Clear-eyed, patch-robed monks Do not take this lightly. Even if you sprout an eye in your forehead and carry a wish-fulfilling gem under your arm which illuminates the world in ten directions Still, we should not take this lightly.

[07:00]

We should be thoroughgoing. I want to talk about something, but I can't skip over anything. So I recount this distress I can't speak for each one of you. I can only speak my own story. For 25 years, I've gone down into the Green Dragon Cave. How many people make their livelihood in the Green Dragon Cave? Sometimes people come in the room to talk to me and they say, how can you sit here so long without any break?

[08:23]

How can you stand the pain? Yesterday someone asked me and I said, well, I've learned by experience which pain is harmful and which pain is not. The pain that's not harmful, I, generally speaking, just sit through. I go down into the green dragon pain And I sit there and I feel just fine. Other kinds of pain I've learned are harmful. And in that case, I move. I've learned from experience which kind cripple me, which kind don't. Some of you have not yet learned to tell the difference between the different kinds of pain and what you should do, so you're anxious, caught in moving between plant-like security and spiritual risk.

[09:56]

But you don't need to decide all by yourself. There are experienced people here you can talk to. If you really are worried, you don't think it's safe, come and talk to us. And if it's an emergency, we can talk to you right away. This isn't to harm our bodies, and it isn't to run away from pain. It's to settle in our circumstances, and sometimes that means change your posture a little bit. Sometimes it means just enjoy what's happening all the way down to the bottom of the cave. You don't have to make the decision all by yourself, though. In 1968, I went to see the teacher of Zen Center, Suzuki Roshi, and I said, it was during Sashin like this, I said, if I sit in half lotus, I can follow my breathing pretty well and feel somewhat calm.

[11:17]

If I sit in full lotus, I hear this screaming. and I don't feel calm at all. The little man said sweetly, why don't you sit in full lotus? That doesn't mean necessarily you should do that, but if you have a question, please ask a question. So I tried and I had a hard time sitting during sashin. Even regular daily zazen I had a hard time. Sashin I had a really hard time. And sometimes I just couldn't stand it.

[12:27]

So I uncrossed my legs. I didn't know what to do, so I did that. I noticed when the pain was strong that it wasn't just monolithic, that it had rhythm. It throbbed. Not exactly, but in some relationship to my breathing. So I decided one period to count the throbs. And I counted 271. And in between the throbs, there was a little rest. After that, I stopped counting. I went to Doksan to talk to the teacher, and I sat down to talk to him.

[13:38]

I don't remember exactly what we said. Didn't talk for very long. I was talking to him about breathing. And he said, oh, excuse me. He said, you stay here. When I went to see him, I was in lots of pain. Every period was very difficult for me. And so he left the room, and I could... This was over in Japantown, at Zen Center's old location on Bush Street. And I heard him, I could hear him going upstairs from the office where we were meeting. I could hear him go upstairs to the zendo and I could hear him walk down the hall to his office up there. And then I could hear the door open to the zendo and hear him go into the zendo.

[14:39]

And then I heard the sound of chanting. It was noon service. And then I heard the chanting stop, and then I heard the meal chant start. And somewhere in there, I noticed that this pain had gone away. And I thought, this is really interesting. And then I just sat there all, and I just kept being interested by the fact that it just really wasn't exactly there. It was still some sensation, but it wasn't painful. And I sat through the whole lunch. And I was, I didn't want to marvel too hard. because I thought it might come back if I marveled too much.

[15:42]

So I just kind of like looked out of the corner of my eye that it wasn't there. And I kind of thought that he did some kind of like magic on me to show me something, to go away for so long, leaving me sitting there. And then after lunch was over, I heard him leave the Zendo and walk down the hall and down the stairs and come to the door, open the door and come in. And he opened the door and he said, Oh! And I really felt he had forgotten me. It wasn't a setup. He just forgot me. And then he sat down and we talked about something else for a while, but mostly I was... I remember that I was sitting there thinking, what is going on? What is pain?

[16:43]

And we concluded our talk, and then I got my lunch break, but not my lunch. And I went back to sit in the afternoon, somewhat expecting that things would be different. But they weren't. And the pain was real bad again right away. I don't know what happened, but I just thought I'd tell you about that. Eyes of compassion observing living beings, an ocean of happiness without limit. This distress deserves attention and not to be taken lightly.

[17:53]

Now I hope it's helpful to connect these words about the three pure precepts and the three bodies of Buddha. In our meal chant, we say homage to the Dharmakaya Vairochana Buddha. Homage, I like to take in the sense of align myself. I align myself with the Dharmakaya Vairochana Buddha, with the cosmic Buddha. which is the body of the law, the body of truth. Homage to the Sambhogakaya Buddha.

[19:04]

Alignment with the body of bliss of Buddha. Homage to the Nirmanakaya Shakyamuni Buddha. homage to the Buddha that appears in forms in many, many transformations. These three bodies correspond to the three pure precepts. How do we say it? Do we say, I vow to, do we say avoid all evil? Well, the first portion is to avoid all evil. The second is to do all good. The third is to save all beings. Is that what we say? Those three correspond with the three bodies. Those three pure precepts are the shape of Buddha's body.

[20:12]

Buddha's body is shaped like that, avoiding evil, doing good, saving beings. That's the shape of Buddha's body. And Buddha's body also is shaped by having this truth body, the bliss body, and the transformation body. So the law body corresponds to avoiding evil. The bliss body corresponds to doing good, and the transformation body or the phantom or illusion body corresponds to saving beings. called complete, perfect, unsurpassed awakening.

[21:21]

It's not three things. But I guess people feel it's helpful to us to concentrate on this Buddha if this Buddha is expressed in the way of avoid evil, do good, and save beings. This is an initiation into your concentration on awakening. This is initiation into your concentration on the appropriate response in this world of suffering. And so are these three bodies. Today I'd like to talk about the first of these pure precepts, and therefore I'll also be talking about the law body, the body of law, the body of truth of the Buddha.

[22:30]

Another way of saying this, first pure precept, instead of avoiding evil, another way to say it, which we say in the Zen school, is to embrace and sustain right conduct or to fulfill the rules and manners to fulfill the forms and dignified deportments is another way to say avoid evil. And in the teaching on conferring or the instruction on conferring and teaching the precepts,

[23:51]

Dogen Zenji says, after saying the precept of fulfilling rules and forms or rules and manners, he says, this precept is the abode of all Buddhas. This precept is the source of all Buddhas. The Dharmakaya, the truth body, is where all the Buddhas live. It's their source. We'll post these precepts on board by the schedule for you to see because tonight we'll have the full moon ceremony and we'll chant these precepts.

[25:09]

So I'd like to help you. I'd like now to tune in to... the abode of the Buddhas. I'd like to tune into the source of Buddhas. Now please use your eyes of compassion to observe sentient beings, first of all. And as a way of tuning into this first precept, again I bring up this tension between what we call the narrow path, the narrow vehicle, and the universal vehicle.

[26:23]

The tension between the Hinayana and the Mahayana in our heart. Here's a few examples. Somebody told me about a relative of hers who has an intense long-standing drinking problem. And in conjunction with this alcoholism, this woman has a a really unwholesome relationship with this relative. And there's a tension there because on one side because of the vicious things this person says and does to her

[27:44]

she has trouble not feeling like she should say something like, you can imagine. At the same time, she doesn't necessarily think that would be of any use to anybody to say those things or to enact those postures. It seems like the whole thing to do is to stay away. On the other hand, another part feels like, you know, well, let's stay in touch and fight. Let's scream and holler and kick and swear and punch. The narrow path says you should actually stay away from battle scenes and not go into bars. And not get into screaming fights with addicted relatives who hate you for bringing up that they have a problem.

[28:54]

Just stay away. The other side is go into the bar. Go into the sewer. Go into hell. And embrace beings there. Sometimes one's right, sometimes the other one's right. Buddhas do not live in the narrow path. Buddhas do not live in the wide path. Buddhas live in the tension between them. So I said to this man, well, you know, maybe the thing to do is, I'm changing sex, genders here, maybe the thing to do to express, maybe you can't go near your father because you'll just fight with him.

[30:09]

So maybe the way to keep in contact with your father and help your father is by being devoted to your wife. Because if you're devoted to your wife, that has something to do with your father. Whatever he's done wrong in his life, still, the fact that you can be devoted to your wife shows that he wasn't that bad, that actually he was a pretty good father even though he has drinking problems. And in that way, no matter how bad your father's situation gets, in fact, you're embracing him. And you're helping him and you're saving him because you're showing that actually there is some goodness here because you're kind to your wife. At the same time, you stay away from a relationship with him that might become harmful to both of you.

[31:12]

So it's not like you necessarily go in either direction, but you stay in the tension and maybe something comes out, something saving comes out. And sometimes you go into the bar and sometimes you stay away. And then there's like here, in this place here, we have forms, we have narrow forms. Like we have a form of not eating between meals here during Sashin. But do we have a form about not eating after meals? I mean, after there's no more meals anymore in the day. Is that between a meal? Is between dinner and breakfast between? Or is that after?

[32:14]

I don't know. I'm not saying that that's an exception. But anyway, last night I had a snack rather late at night. I had some granola. It was late at night because I was ironing my kimono and I was ironing my kimono because I just washed my kimono and I just washed my kimono because I slipped in the mud and fell down and got all dirty. So I washed it and then I ironed it and then I had some granola. Sounds like a really neat chocolate chip. Anyway, someone who saw me having my snack said that I was sinning during Sashin.

[33:20]

And there appeared a vision of some large number of Zen students in their black robes in the walk-in, eating from the blue-lined shelves. We have shelves at Green Gulch called blue-lined shelves. You're not supposed to eat from those shelves. They're for the kitchen. This is called stuffing the dharmakaya body, the dharma body with the transformation body. And that's called the joke body. Also there's like called, there's this narrow form of being on time.

[34:34]

This morning when I was walking around here, I saw this big convention out in the Cloud Hall. I thought Tai was inside saying, stay out. The Zendo's flooded. And then someone else told me that she's having some problem during meals because she keeps thinking of killing the servers. And she feels bad about thinking about killing the servers. Because she knows, really, it's OK what they're doing. They could even do other things. That would be OK, too. And yet, they're not doing things the way that they're usually done.

[35:42]

And this tension. between the way things are usually done and the way things are being done. This tension between his ideal and the anthropological data creates this sense of wanting to kill servers. There is a way things are done, actually. It's arbitrary, but there it is. And none of this needs to be taken lightly, and yet we need to live in the balance or the tension, the dynamic tension between maintaining forms

[36:45]

and going beyond them. Hinayana is getting stuck in these forms, Mahayana is going beyond them, is realizing that they're empty, that we just as a group carefully, sincerely over centuries made them up. These aren't by accident, there's a reason for them. But the very reason for these forms is exactly why they're empty. And the more you understand the reason for them, the more you realize that they're empty and the more you can go beyond them when you maintain them. And those who maintain them the most strictly and the most sincerely for the longest time are the ones who most likely Go beyond them. And not in a lazy way, but naturally, spontaneously, you have to fall in the mud.

[37:56]

I'll tell this story again. Some of you have already heard it, the story about this. It's a story about Japanese, some Japanese people who lived during Tokugawa era. A monk named, a Zen monk named Cho On. he was serving tea to a warlord, Lord Sendai. And another monk, his Dharma brother, dropped by. His Dharma brother's name was Tetsugyu, Iron Bull, dropped by. And so they invited him to join their tea. Chon took out a tea bowl, an antique tea bowl, which Lord Sendai had given to him.

[39:31]

And he put it down to make tea. And his Dharma brother, Iron Bull, smashed the tea bowl with his nyoi. It broke. Iron Bull said, look at the authentic teabowl before birth. Cho-on turned white and almost fainted. Lord Sendai said, to Cho, I gave you that bowl but I would like you to give it back to me now and before you give it back please have it glued together again and have a box made for it and put it in the box and on top of the box write the name of the bowl which is called the authentic tea bowl before birth and then I will pass this bowl on to my descendants

[41:05]

Chow Un was holding the authentic antique thing. Tetsugyu broke it. This is two extremes. One almost fainted when what he was holding onto was broken. The other demonstrated some vitality, but could only show going beyond. Lord Sendai put it back together. And this is what we pass on. This is what's called bringing it out and practicing with it.

[42:17]

This is pointing to the Dharma body. As Suzuki Roshi teacher said, in this way there is change in no change. And there is no change in change.

[43:23]

All Buddhas have single-mindedly devoted themselves to the practice of Zazen. They all did that. There's no change in that practice. That's why we say, practice not Zazen. and then glue it back together and put it in a box and call it the authentic Zazen before Zazen was born and pass that on. I've heard some people are being pushed to their limit on the forms here, but we're actually not pushing them too hard. For example, I'm rather lightheartedly mentioning about those people out in the Cloud Hall there before Zazen.

[44:49]

I asked the Hino, did the rain make it so that they couldn't hear the bell, do you think? And he said, no, I think the bell was quite distinct. It's really okay. And there is a practice called being on time. Okay is swell, and being on time is also really nice. But being on time is not it, and being late is not it. If you're on time, you should remember that on time is empty. And if you're late, you should remember that being late is not empty. It's being late. Of course everybody knows being late is empty, right?

[46:01]

And everybody knows Being on time is really not empty. It really is being on time. But what most people don't realize when they're on time is that it's empty. And most people who are late don't remember that being late is not empty. It is an iron bull. It is the place where practice turns. So if you're on time, don't just go to sleep. and pat yourself on the back and say, that's it. Hinayana is not it. And if you're late, don't just sort of pat yourself on the back and say, well, I finally transcended the schedule. You can say that, really. But please say it from the place where you feel these two sides, not when you're veering off to one extreme or the other. of holding the bowl or breaking the bowl.

[47:11]

This Dharmakaya, this Truth Body, does not come or go, does not increase or decrease. It never changes. it's arising right now. And that which never changes, when it changes it changes into these forms of practice. It changes into walking upright in Chinese style. It changes into stepping into the room with your left foot closest to the door jamb on the left and stepping out with your right foot.

[48:27]

It changes into sitting upright in the most vital way you can find. It changes into when you pour your water out into the waste bucket, not pouring out all the water. I saw somebody pour out all the water this morning. Now someone could say, what's the reason for not pouring it all out? Well, the reason is tradition. You say, well, what's the reason for the tradition? Well, the reason is that we're going to offer this water. We could drink all that water. But we're not drinking it all. We're actually saving some for the spirits. You know who the spirits are? Well, that's another talk. But anyway, there are some spirits. And we're supposed to not just feed this person and make sure everybody else in the room got fed.

[49:31]

There's also spirits to feed. Now, of course, these spirits are empty. But anyway, just like you're empty, you've got to feed yourself and you've got to feed the spirits. If you don't feed the spirits, then they turn into ghosts. So we feed them. All of you donate, but some of you didn't make a donation this morning. So the reason for not pouring it all out is, of course, when you pour it all out, you say, well, excuse me, no. Some of you did make a donation, but you made too much of a donation, I'm sorry. You poured too much in. See, the reason for not pouring it out is that there's some kind of grungy stuff at the bottom there. That little, those dregs there. You're supposed to not give those to the spirits. And you're supposed to keep those and drink those yourself so the spirits get that clearer stuff on top. Sometimes when I put my hands down in there, I look and I see some dregs, some stuff floating around in there.

[50:33]

And yesterday I reached way down and I thought, I wonder if I scooped up any of that stuff, which I would then drink. I don't know if I did, but anyway. So please don't pour it all out and that kind of unattractive stuff down at the bottom there. Keep that for yourself and give the spirits that kind of clearer stuff on the top. This is a form. So I would imagine that some of you have some resistances that maybe you don't, but... And I could imagine many kinds of resistance, like resistance of spirits, weird. Japanese tradition, weird. But also paying attention, weird. Whatever, you know, there's many kinds of resistances. But really what is a resistance to, I feel, is a resistance to being in the abode of all Buddhas. When you're in that abode, there's no resistance there.

[51:39]

you finally hit the mark. Now some people are really enthusiastic about making these cute little spirit offerings. They're really enthusiastic about it. That can be resistance too. You can resist by being overly enthusiastic about the Asian forms. You can resist by fighting them. There's a place between this over-enthusiasm and under-enthusiasm. That's the Dharma body. The eyes of compassion will guide you to that place, will help you settle into the anxiety of moving back and forth between plant-like security, your autonomic nervous system, and animal spiritual risk.

[52:52]

Animal spiritual risk. taking a walk and talking to somebody. I have one, two, at least two, really, three really interesting stories left. And already you people are probably at the limit of your patience.

[54:06]

So I'm kind of anxious about what to do. Would you permit me to tell one of these stories and I'll ask if you permit me to tell the next one? It's out of order, but I'm going to tell the short story first. But remember when I tell it that it's out of order. Someone came and talked to me about his meditation practice. Oh, that's right, make yourself comfortable. Forgot about that one. Make yourself comfortable. And this person said something like, well, I need some instruction in meditation. I'm not asleep in zazen.

[55:11]

but I'm also not interested." And I said, that sounds pretty good. That's one of the doors to liberation, being not asleep and not interested. It's called the absorption in disinterest. or the wishless gate to liberation. Most people, when they're sitting in meditation, if it isn't interesting, they either make it interesting, which is pretty easy to do, just think of something interesting, like something other than this, or they go to sleep. But to stay awake with something that's not interesting, this is the door to liberation. It doesn't sound too good, I know. But that's the thing about the door of liberation, it doesn't sound good.

[56:13]

What sounds good is the door to bondage. That's why you can't restrain yourself from going through that door, because it sounds so good, you're stuck going through that door again and again. The door of liberation is not very interesting, except that it's liberation. It's the only thing that's got going for it, it's freedom. So this person was feeling kind of depressed. about actually doing real Buddhist practice. There's three doors to liberation. That's one of them. To be awake and pay attention to something that's not interesting. So please. The thing about pain is that it's fairly interesting, but you can't help it. That's the way it is sometimes. That's the short story. And there's a slight appendix to that short story.

[57:24]

And this person asked me about, she brought up an interesting meditation practice called the Six Subtle Dharma Gates. And that's quite interesting. I'll tell you about that later. For those of you who don't want to do uninteresting practice, And here's another short story. A monk came up and asked the great teacher, Dung Shan, what is it that doesn't fall into any of the bodies? What is it that doesn't fall into any of the three bodies? That doesn't fall into the Dharmakaya, Sambhogakaya, or Nirmanakaya? What is it that doesn't fall into the three pure precepts? And by the way, to not fall into them, to stay away from them, is also falling into them.

[58:26]

What is it that doesn't fall into them or fall away from them? And Dung Shan said, I'm always close to this. Or I'm always close. This that doesn't fall into any Buddha body is not falling into any of the three pure precepts, is not falling into or away from the forms of practice. This is practicing strictly with detachment. This is what the ancestors are always close to. It's not very interesting. It's hard to stay awake with it. But eyes of compassion don't mind taking care of it.

[59:29]

Part of me wants to say, I'm not going to say it though, but part of me wants to say, please do like Dung Shan and stay close, but I'm not going to say that. But now I am going to say it. Please stay close to this body, to this not even body. Please stay close to that which doesn't fall into any of the three bodies of Buddha. Please concentrate on that. And if you don't, it's okay. Unlike my friend, I won't hate you if you don't do it because I know how hard it is myself.

[60:53]

It's hard. I'd like to concentrate on something more interesting. But if you guys wouldn't be so lazy as me, That would be helpful, and I might be able to do it if you could do it. But my bodhisattva vow won't let me do it before you, you know. So please, be great Zen students. Then I have no more excuses, and then I'll have to join you. Clear-eyed pastoral monks, please don't take this lightly. There's more stories about this issue, and I kind of wanted to tell you them all today, but I give up.

[62:30]

But I remembered that there's tomorrow, so I could tell you more tomorrow about this first precept, the precept of fulfilling the forms and dignified behaviors of the Buddhas, which is the law body, which is the address of all Buddhas, which is the source of all Buddhas. Thank you for letting me tell you those stories.

[63:16]

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