I think I will begin with a kind of a confession and apology. The other day I was working in the fields and we were seeding, lettuces, putting little lettuce seeds in, in little matrix, matrices. And the bell rang. Well, not the bell didn't ring anyway. Someone said it was time for tea. And people went to tea. But I didn't go.

[01:05]

I kept working. I kept putting seeds in the little boxes. I'm sorry I did that. But my mistake also may be of some use. As most of you know, we have a practice when we're working together that when we say, please stop and go do something else, we ask everyone to just stop and go do something else. decide for themselves what that means in their particular case.

[02:10]

And then when they figure out what it means for them, then they do what they think is right or wrong or whatever, but just simply do what the other monks are doing. So I actually have given some number of talks where I've said that to do better than what the other monks are doing is not really the way. To excel in work or something over the other monks is not really the way. That just to follow along with what they're doing

[03:16]

Is the body and mind dropped off? Is the self of the body and mind dropped off? And yet, on this occasion, I got involved in my own personal opinion about what to do. Later I may entertain you with some of the intricacies of my thinking about how I thought that this was a reasonable occasion for an exception to the rule. But for now I want to say that I'm I'm actually proposing that we continue to do that practice when we're working together in a communal way, that we continue the practice so that other people will also have the opportunity to violate it and catch themselves at putting their own ideas ahead of the traditional practice.

[04:40]

After the tea, I eventually did go to tea. After the tea, the person I was working with said, may I ask you a question? Why didn't you stop with everybody else? And I told him my excuse. And he said, I don't know, maybe he said, is it because you're the boss? You don't have to do it? I said, no, that's not the reason. But actually, maybe that is the reason, that being the boss, you start thinking, well, yes, of course, you're supposed to stop, but I have this very deep understanding of what's really important on this occasion. I should make this very special contribution here and sacrifice my tea time to do this little bit extra work.

[05:56]

Everybody else can go and have a nice tea, but I, I will give up my tea for the sake of these seedlings. Or whatever I was thinking. So this is my introduction to the case which we've talked about before where the World Honored One was walking with the congregation and he pointed to the ground and said, this is a good place to build a sanctuary. And Indra, the emperor of the gods, took a blade of grass and stuck it in the ground and said, the sanctuary is built. And the world honor one smiled. This is a good place to build a sanctuary.

[07:22]

Not this plus my ideas of what a sanctuary is or what a sanctuary isn't. But this, without any dogmatic attachments, without any personal prejudices, simply, this is a good place. Even if we have studied the Buddha's teaching for many years, When we arrive at this place, we have to forget about everything we've ever learned in order to really enter the way now.

[08:34]

The longer we study, we have more to give up. We know more interesting things, and in some ways it's more difficult to give up all we've learned and all we've attained. So the beginner has an advantage not knowing so much. Doesn't have to give up quite as much But the person who's been practicing longer knows, oh yes, it's a wonderful practice to stop when everybody else stops. But this is a special case.

[09:43]

I'll grant myself an exception. One time the teacher, Dogen, said, those who study the path must let go of body and mind and enter wholly into the way of Buddha. Right now, can we let go of body and mind and directly, without any technique, enter into the way of Buddha?

[11:13]

Without any idea of what that is, simply enter. even if it might be inconvenient, even if it might be uncomfortable, even if it might be different from what we think. He's recommending that we drop all body-mind attachments and simply enter into the way. An ancient said, atop a hundred foot pole, how will you step forward? Thus having climbed to the top of a hundred foot pole, there is a mind which thinks that it will die if it lets go of its foothold.

[12:24]

and so holds fast. The admonition to take a step forward means that having concluded that it would not be bad, Then, so as to cast all body and mind, one must deliberately abandon everything, from one's worldly occupations to one's lifetime career. As long as one does not abandon this, no matter if one studies the way with the urgency as if beating flames from your head, it will still not be possible to accomplish the way.

[13:34]

You must settle your resolve and cast off body and mind. And again, I would I would mention that the word abandoned is not negative. To negatively throw away body and mind is another kind of attachment. Some people hearing this story about climbing to the top of the 100-foot pole and taking another step think that they have to climb to the top of the 100-foot pole.

[14:49]

But we're already there. You're right now on the top of the 100-foot pole. In that story about Buddha pointing to the ground, another translation that sometimes I've seen is the Buddha pointing to the ground and said, this is a good place to set up a flagpole. And flagpole, in other words, to raise the flag of the truth. Students, cast aside your bodies and minds and enter fully into Buddha Way.

[16:06]

An old master said, you've climbed to the top of a 100-foot pole. Now keep on going. Most people, when they reach the top, are afraid they will lose their footing and fall to their deaths. Thus they hang on all the more tightly. To advance another step means to discard all thoughts of everything. From your functions as a savior of other beings to your means of livelihood and it even requires casting away your own life. Even if it requires casting away your own life. If you do not do this, and even if you study the way as earnestly as though you were trying to put out the flames in your own hair, you will not be able to attain the way. My bookmark for this book is a picture of some probably upper-class Chinese kids riding on dogs.

[18:00]

Well, actually, one's riding a dog and the other one's riding another little kid who has a dog mask on. Now, I point this out because you may think that this talk you've just heard is something other than this kind of activity. You may think that jumping off 100-foot poles and casting aside body and mind is something different than riding around on dogs and wearing masks. and rolling in the grass. Cast aside that mind too. And we have this practice called gassho, you know, where we put our palms together.

[19:16]

And when we do that, all around this activity, whatever this activity really is, are various mental and physical images, some of which we think are real. To do the practice of gassho means to do the thing which is free of all the physical and mental images that arise on such an occasion. To abandon them, not to negate them, but to not let them confuse you and to find out what this really is.

[20:32]

And to use what this really is as the opportunity, as the doorway to the way of enlightenment. If I negate what I think this is, that negation will stop me from entering. If I believe what this is, what this seems to be, if I believe the images that arise as I join my hands, the mental and physical images, then that belief stops me. The images do not stop me. My belief and attachment to those images has stopped me.

[21:39]

Those mental, physical images are the top of the 100-foot pole. Take a step beyond these images. Right now, take a step beyond the body-mind images that you're experiencing. give up the world as you think it is and surrender to the way of Buddha.

[23:09]

I'm passing this message on to you but I really don't deserve to by any superiority because as I said the other day I couldn't do it. I had some thought in my mind like, well, if we go away from this thing, it's not done and birds might come and eat the seeds. Therefore, my so-called compassionate heart wanted to protect our work and finish it before I left it. Seems like a good idea. I was trying to be good. I was trying to avoid and get away from doing bad. But I held to my opinions and got stuck.

[24:26]

Dogen Zenji says, people who study the way must abandon all human emotions. And again, abandon does not mean negate. Negating human emotions is attachment. Abandon them means leave them alone and walk the way of freedom. As you're walking, if you see Buddha, keep walking.

[25:45]

If you see not Buddha, keep walking. The Buddha you see is just your own idea. The Buddha I don't see, the thing I see is not Buddha, is just my idea. In both cases, let's just keep walking. What is Buddha and what is not Buddha is the top of the 100-foot pole. Step off from there. And don't worry, you're not going to fall. You will enter. And the real Buddha will take care of you. And real Buddha is not my idea or your idea of Buddha. It's not even better than our idea of Buddha, or worse. People who study the Way must abandon all human emotion.

[26:54]

what is called abandonment of human emotion is to go in accord with the Buddha way. People of the world are mostly possessed by the nature of the individual vehicle, discriminating good and bad, distinguishing right and wrong, taking right and discarding wrong. This is all the nature of the individual vehicle. My way. One must only first abandon worldly emotions and enter into Buddha Way. To enter into the way of Buddhas is to abandon the act of distinguishing good and bad in your own mind.

[27:58]

And again, it does not mean that the activity of distinguishing between good and bad is not going on in your mind. It means that you are no longer attached to the workings of your mind, which is distinguishing between good and bad. So even though my mind distinguishes between good and bad, I can still go to tea and not keep everybody waiting. Forget conscious thoughts about the welfare of your own body, about the condition of your mental health, whether good or bad, and follow the speech and behavior of the Buddhas and Zen adepts.

[29:09]

What you think in your own mind to be good, or what people of the world think is good, is not necessarily good. Therefore, forget the views of others, abandon even your own mind, and follow the teachings of Buddha. Don't love birth, don't hate birth.

[30:39]

Don't love death, don't hate death. It means when you find yourself loving birth or hating birth, please honor that love and hate. And the greatest honor to that love and hate is to take the opportunity, take that opportunity to build a sanctuary. Don't accept or reject your hate or love. Simply let that be the place where you realize the way. This is called dropping body-mind.

[31:51]

This is called building a sanctuary. This is called smiling Buddha. I don't know how what I said today is being understood by you.

[33:44]

But one point which I want to make an addition, which may not be clear, is that by stepping off or taking a step forward from the top of the hundred-foot pole. By abandoning all our emotions, one of the things that happens is that all the lines of communication in the ocean of all the emotion of all beings, all those lines open up. By dropping my own emotion, by letting go of attachment to my own emotion, I find that I'm able to

[35:07]

connect and receive and interact with the emotion of all beings. So the amount of emotional exposure actually in some sense is enriched by being willing to climb to the top of my own emotions. In other words, to fully experience where I am emotionally and go beyond that does not eliminate emotion. It only eliminates attachment to one particular kind. And the courage to walk forward from the top of the 100-foot pole is almost equivalent, if not simply equivalent, to being unafraid of other people's emotions and other people's ideas.

[36:26]

So that other people then can say things to you which may seem interesting to the extreme. So interesting that you really have a little trouble giving it much credit. It doesn't mean then you have to start attaching to other people's ideas either. Time is up. Any last minute comments? I'm confused about You mean like, let's say you were

[37:56]

They're supposed to go to tea and someone wants to talk to you about some problem they're having? So if you go to tea you'd have to cut off the conversation? Is that what you mean? Something like that? Right. So what has just been recommended is that if you're involved in the activity of saving a being, that you abandon that idea of saving the being and enter the Buddha's way. What is that idea? What is it besides an idea? A feeling? What kind of reaction do you mean?

[39:26]

Compassion is to let go of compassion and enter Buddha's way. If you've got a real chunk of compassion here, okay, real hot chunk of compassion, let's say A cool chunk of compassion you got? Okay. What temperature? 47 degrees? Got air temperature compassion. You got a piece of it? Okay. I would suggest you let go of that and then enter the Buddha's way right there and see what that is. Maybe you invite the person to come to tea with you. When somebody's suffering, it does not necessarily help them for you to become disabled by what they're disabled by. It might be good for you to say, hey, come on to tea.

[40:29]

Let's go have some peanut butter. That might be the right thing to do. Maybe the right thing to do would be something else. I don't know. But first of all, let go of this idea or this chunk or whatever it is, this experience you have, this image you have, of compassion. Let go of it and see where that takes you. But don't just see where it takes you. Let it take you to the true way of helping this person beyond your idea and their idea of what's helpful. I knew a person once who almost every time she was coming to the Zendo she was accosted by some needy person. She managed to find almost every time she was coming to the Zendo somebody who needed her help. She was the mother of all beings. And there were never a shortage of them between, particularly as she was going to the Zendo, she ran into these people. But this was almost entirely her idea.

[41:39]

And she held tight to that idea. Well, if there's no idea, then in some ways there's no way to enter the Buddha way. If you don't have the idea of being in your room or being out on the lawn or talking to somebody, you have no way to get into the Zendo. You've got to have some idea in order to walk forward. You've got to be on the top of a 100-foot pole. It's not like you're standing in midair. You have some place to stand, always. But the place you have to stand is very small. It's just here, right here. That's the only place you have to stand. And most people... most of the time, hold on to where they are.

[42:45]

They don't think they can go any place else other than where they are. So they hold on to what they think and what they feel and what they emote and what they believe. So you always... It isn't that you shouldn't have something, like some idea. You do have some idea. The point is, go forward from there. And you think, if I go forward in there, my life will be lost or this person's life will be lost. or hurt or whatever. So does that mean that if you're pulling somebody out of the water who's drowning that you walk away from them? No, it doesn't mean that. It means that you let go of your idea of good and bad while you're pulling the person out of the water. And because you are not attached to your idea of, I'm helping them, or this is going to enhance my career, or this may set my career back because actually I wasn't even supposed to be here in the first place, or, you know, I should be dressed differently, or whatever you think, anyway, while you're helping this person out of the water,

[44:01]

I'm suggesting abandon your body and mind while you're doing that. And that will allow you, I propose, to be more effective in pulling them out of the water. And the person who's pulling them out of the water is not just pulling them out of the water. This person is also practicing Buddhism with them. So they have the opportunity to encounter someone who's free of ideas of helping or not helping them while simultaneously doing a very natural thing, namely pulling them out of the water. Which in some stories, if a person's practicing that way, what they sometimes do after they pull them out of the water is they push them back in the water and pull them out again. If these people are very close, you know, if one is drawing the teacher out of the other one, they may get into quite a little interesting thing there, back and forth until both of them are letting go of all ideas of good and bad.

[45:09]

While both of them are probably getting heavily, heavily producing ideas of good and bad, too. Like the one who's pushing back in says, boy, this looks bad. and the one who's, you know, and so on. Ideas are still always coming, surging forth, tremendous vitality. The question is how not to be caught by this vitality. It's not easy, right? I got caught just by one tea thing, you know. A few little seeds got me. Imagine if you're doing something bigger scale. Like you got somebody who's really upset who you're taking care of. It's very difficult not to switch into, ooh, I'm blowing it. Ooh, I'm really helpful. So you probably do slip into those. The question is, do you then attach to them and fall for that? Like if you give a lecture, you know, and then some people say, that was a terrible lecture.

[46:16]

Jeez, does that mean that 50 people thought it was bad and I wasted 50 people's time? Boy, that's a big mistake. And then I have a big emotion. Doesn't mean that doesn't happen. It means that even if the emotion gets very big, which it sometimes does, I enter the Buddha's way on that emotion. I don't say, well this one, I can't do it on this one, this is too big, this is too ugly, this is too bad. It wouldn't be right to attain liberation under such adverse circumstances. Again, now I have a dogmatic idea about what are the right opportunities. But the point of Buddhism is that there are no right opportunities. Every opportunity And each opportunity and this opportunity are the only opportunities.

[47:17]

There aren't other ones. But we think there are. Well, we're not going to stop thinking that there are. We're not going to stop thinking, well, I can't attain Buddha's way in the middle of all this pain and uneasiness. We think that way. Well, so what? Enter anyway. And then sometimes people say, no, this is the kind of situation where you can enter Buddha's way. Well, that's right. That's actually right. This is the kind of situation. But because they believe that thought and attach to that thought, they don't enter. Because you have to abandon the thought, this is the place. Even the teaching, this is a good place, you have to abandon that teaching. When you hear those words, you have to abandon those words too in order to do it. Do you understand? Anyway, I kind of understand too, but it's hard to practice it, very hard to practice it.

[48:26]

Especially when, you know, especially in the middle of pain, when your body hurts or something like that, you think, well, I'll just get my body a little bit more comfortable and then I'll do this thing about abandonment. Then I'll step off the 100-foot pole. But right now, this isn't the right time. I'm uncomfortable, you know? So if I was kind of calm here on the top 100-foot pole, then I can sort of remember the teachings and say, okay, now, all right, let's go. But when you're all, you know, sometimes it's just really difficult. Buddhism is not easy. I'm not saying it's easy. It's hard. Yeah. Yes. What would have been the right response?

[49:38]

I think we did pretty well. I think there was a whole bunch. I think there was about 50 responses to it. I mean, at the first instance there were about 50 responses. And then there was 50 more and [...] 50 more. The question is, were people entering Buddha's way on each one of those responses? I don't know. Did you? Did someone? So what's your question? Did I answer it? Do you have some other point to raise about that? You mean like should you have gotten up from your seat or that kind of thing? I think that there were more than enough people at the site. There was about eight people standing around her and that seemed to be about six extra

[50:44]

I think two was plenty. The two that were plenty, just I think by coincidence, were the two that were closest. They took care of it. But the other people, I mean, it wasn't harmful. I don't think that the other people, extra people, were there. But it... Is abandoning your seat harmful? No. Abandoning anything, there's no harm in abandoning anything. By this meaning, abandoning meaning not attaching. So one of the people who went over there, although that person got up from this place and walked over that place, that person's seat went with them. Every step of the way they didn't abandon their seat in the sense of negating their seat. But your real seat, you can only have your seat if you abandon all past seats. If you're holding on to your old ideas of what zazen is, you're stuck back in your old emotions or your old ideas. You have to have a new, fresh zazen all the time.

[51:51]

That's why it's nice that he used a blade of grass, something fresh and green. How you doing? Pardon? Right, that's right. So what do you do with that other idea of getting up and responding to another person? What do you do with that? What? Right. So how are you doing with that? Are you entering Buddha's way? What? Into the time? Anything else at this point?

[53:00]

Yes? Someone anticipated, like the person called Sandhava. Sandhava, the Sandhava person? Yeah. I anticipated what happened. Uh-huh. [...] And my question is, did you enter Buddha's way with what did happen? Yesterday I was taking a shower with some people and these two guys came in and they started talking about method acting, two guys I didn't know.

[54:19]

And I thought of this really extreme example of method acting. And there was another guy standing near me who I did know. And I turned to him to talk to him about this extreme example of method acting. It was an example from this movie, My Left Foot. Does anybody not know about that movie? It's a movie about this person who has, I think, cerebral palsy, an Irish writer and painter. It's a movie about his life. And he wrote, he painted with his left foot. And he also wrote, he also typed with his left foot. And it's a movie about his life. So this actor who was playing his life, sort of method actor, he stayed in that character for six weeks, all the time. He stayed in the wheelchair the whole time.

[55:20]

And the story is about a man named Christie Brown. And when Christie Brown's parents and relatives came to the site of making the film, and when they came to the site, the actor stayed in character. Do you understand what I mean? He's sitting in a wheelchair, paralyzed, and when the parents and relatives of the actual person who is dead now came, he kept talking to them. He talked to them that way. So I was telling, I wanted to, they were talking about method acting, so I gave that example. But I talked to this guy I knew instead of the guys who brought up the thing. And I realized later I was talking to the wrong person. that they were the ones who were really interested, but I didn't know them. So I turned in a more familiar direction, even though it wasn't really the right person.

[56:26]

He sort of was, he kind of was, you know, paying attention to me, but he's a little bit kind of like, well, he wasn't really that interested. And I kind of felt like, well, maybe, you know, better luck next time. Hopefully you can talk to the right person. But if I had talked to these guys, I would have made some new friends. Plus, they were really interested in this particular bunch of ideas called method acting, right? They would have been very interested. But I couldn't bring myself to just sort of get into this intense example with people I didn't know, you know, never met before, standing naked in the showers. So it's hard for us to... be there with what's happening and turn in the right direction. We often flinch because we can't believe and trust what's really apropos. But still, even when you miss, you can enter Buddha's way that way. It actually was a fairly big encouragement to me to next time try to talk to the right person, even though there's a fear to talk to the right person.

[57:29]

And it's easy to talk to the wrong person because you know that person pretty well, right? Well, it wasn't exactly the right or wrong person, again, because even though I talked to the wrong person, in other words, I talked to the person who wasn't interested. And he was kind of, as I say, he really wasn't interested. And here were these people who were. And I didn't even know them, and they were nice young people, and I would have made friends with these nice young people, and that would have been neat, and they would have had, they wanted to talk about that. He didn't. So it wasn't exactly wrong, it was just sort of like, sort of stupid, you know, I don't know what. It was just, I missed the mark, you know. There was an opportunity here, there wasn't one there, and I went to where there wasn't one. But the thing about where there wasn't one was that was the one I was comfortable with. And that's characteristic of my life in general. I'm comfortable being the person I used to be and hang out with that guy rather than be the new one, which is actually the one that's happening.

[58:30]

So it's inappropriate, but at least I can pat myself on the back and say, it's inappropriate, but it seems safe, doesn't it? One's more vital than the other, I would say. But even the unvital one, even the stupid one, even the chicken one, still you can enter Buddha's way there too. So really, as far as Buddhism goes, you never miss. Even though you turn the wrong direction and go to this kind of chicken realm where you're hanging around with your old self, you know, rather than meeting the new person that you could be and the new friends you could make, the ones who are dying to meet you, rather than the old ones who don't know what you're talking about. Even the mistaken way of going to the deadly old-fashioned way, still you can learn that place too. So maybe it would have been neat if you sort of made this move and caught her, and it would have been really neat, you know. And people would say, boy, you skipped Melcher, he's so fast, you know. He was so sensitive, and he made this move, and it was just, you know, fantastic, you know.

[59:38]

It would have been good for your career. But now, anyway, what happened was what happened, and you're sort of who you are, and let's use that. Let's use that. So we do make mistakes. We do miss wonderful opportunities throughout the day, most days. Most of us miss quite a few. great chances to really be helpful and to just say the right thing. You know, we flinch, we miss, and not flinching is beautiful. It really is great, and it makes very encouraging stories. But the most encouraging story is to use what happens rather than what might have happened. And what happens is often we miss, and we don't usually like to use missing as the opportunity. We want to use hitting as the opportunity. Missing and hitting, both are good. Let's use whatever happens. Let's use this place to build a sanctuary.

[60:42]

And maybe once in a while, this place will be kind of a new place, just like the kind of place we think we should be practicing. But most of the time, or a lot of the time anyway, this does not seem like a very good candidate for realizing Buddha's way. So let's try to get beyond our own ideas of what's the right time and place and use the one that seems to be here. And again, the one that seems to be here is to a great extent just our images and so on. So let's just not be fooled by by these abstractions and these images.

[61:35]

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