Questions for you, which I've asked you before at the beginning of practice periods, but I'd like to ask again. And this time, I'd like you to write down the answers when they come and give them to me. So first question is, what is your ultimate concern What is your ultimate concern? And ultimate means final. That can also mean most important or most fundamental.

[01:03]

And then the next question is, what does the ultimate concern, if you have the answer to that, what does ultimate concern require of you? What do you need? How do you need to live in order to realize what your ultimate concern is? And third is, how does that relate to this practice period? That is, what focus and practice would follow for you if you can answer those first two questions?

[02:17]

Those are three questions. And if you can answer them, please write a piece of paper. Give me a piece of paper or give me a copy of your piece of paper. I'd like to read it. That will help me understand your orientation. I won't tell anybody, unless you want me to, I won't tell anybody else what you wrote. But I'd like you to sign it. And if you don't want to sign it, anonymous is okay too. But I won't tell anybody else that so-and-so's ultimate concern is such-and-such. But I would like to tell other people anonymously, give the rest of the practice period a sense of of the orientation of the group. Does that make sense? I think you will find if you can answer these questions and you hear other people's concerns and other people hear your concern, I think you'll find this very encouraging.

[03:47]

But I also understand that you might not be able to answer the first question for a while. which is fine. Take your time. But if you can answer it soon, then tell me. Give it to me on paper, and then also give it to me verbally, of course. Now, I could tell you my ultimate concern is that I don't want to influence you. but I thought about it before I asked you what mine is. So I answer those questions for me. And after I get your answers, I'll tell you mine. But I will tell you that following from ultimate concern, the focus of the teaching for this practice period, at least from the beginning for me, will be about... What's the meaning of zazen?

[04:58]

Or what do we mean by zazen? Well, what do I mean by it? And by I, I mean me and the people who have taught me by we. I would suggest that you read the Windbill article that I just wrote, the last Windbill article I wrote. I suggest you read that little article. I'd like to talk with you about that article and see if you have some questions about that. And there's some other articles which come out of that article which haven't been written yet but will be written during this practice period. Somebody transcribed these classes. Okay, so that focus will be, you know, about zazen.

[06:17]

It says, you know, we have this practice called just sitting. You've heard about that. That's an expression of zazen. Zazen is sometimes spoken of as just sitting. But it is also sometimes said by teachers of sotozen, and Rinzai Zen too, that you can just sit, but it's important that you understand what it means to just sit. So, just sitting is not just sitting according to your uneducated understanding of just sitting. Yeah, like it says in the, in Vendôva, you know, that section, are you chanting that at noon service, this section on self-fulfilling samadhi? Not yet?

[07:19]

What are you chanting at noon service? Heart Sutra? So, could we start chanting that at noon service? Do you have copies of that? So it says in there, in this section of the Vendôva on the self-fulfilling samadhi, it says, from the first time you meet a master, And it says, without incense offering, bowing, repentance, chanting Buddha's name, and so on, just wholeheartedly sit and drop away body and mind. That part's familiar to you, right? So this thing about from the first time you meet a master, what does that mean, first time you meet a master? Well, one thing that means to me would be from the first time you, like, talk with somebody about what this just sitting is and understand what it is, then just wholeheartedly sit.

[08:34]

So my uneducated understanding of just sitting is my personal understanding of what just sitting is. But when you meet a master, that means you let somebody else's idea about what just sitting is into your heart, and you let your understanding evolve and change so it's not just your one-sided understanding of what just sitting means. So you're not just dreaming of just sitting. your just sitting has been turned around a little bit by exposing it to other aspects of reality besides your own point of view. So then when you have that kind of meeting and your understanding of just sitting is not like you meet the master and you have a talk about just sitting and then suddenly now you understand it perfectly.

[10:01]

I don't think it's like that. but rather that when you meet the master and you talk about sitting, your understanding of zazen goes into process so that you no longer have quite such a fixed idea about what just sitting means. In other words, you open up your mind that you don't know what just sitting is, and nobody does. So when you sit, when you just sit, understanding that you're doing something, you have no idea what you're doing. I mean, you have an idea, but that really doesn't have much to do with it. And it's not just that you think that, but also you're open to input into this process, then that's what's called meeting with the master.

[11:09]

Then you can just sit. Then you can just sit. Understand? Then you can just sit. In other words, then you can just, you don't know what to do. Then you can enter into a practice that you have no idea how to do it. So you'll be really relaxed and totally secure because you don't know anything anymore, right? So in other words, your perspective on the sitting changes and is changing because that's what's really happening. And so I don't know exactly, not hearing the answer to the questions I asked you, I'm not sure where you stand in terms of how much input you want from

[12:26]

the environment here from me and other people, how much input, how much reorientation, how much dynamism you want in your practice. I don't know. Maybe you'd say, well, I got this practice. Just let me do it. So if that's the case, that might be OK. Some people want to hear about my trip to China. And I don't know, maybe some people don't want to hear about the trip to China. And some people do. But one part of it that I'd like to bring up is that while I was in China, I came near to a place that has always been very important for me

[13:44]

in terms of my imagination, which is called the Jungnan Mountains, or particularly the Jungnan Foothills. The Jungnan Mountain Range is a mountain range which is south of the modern city of Xi'an, which is the The modern name for Xi'an means Western Peace, and it's the modern name for a city that used to be called Chang'an, which means Eternal Peace. Chang'an was the capital of the Tang Dynasty, and actually Chang'an was the capital of 11 Chinese dynasties, so it was probably the place where most dynasties had their capital. The south of Chang'an is a mountain range, And in particular, a famous poet named Wong Wei lived there. But lots of poets and yogis, Taoist and Buddhist yogis, lived in those mountains from ancient times.

[14:52]

For thousands of years, they've lived in those mountains. And they still do. So I was, particularly when I was in Xi'an, I thought about those mountain ranges, and I was actually reading about... What some of you know, a book's been written about some of these yogis that are still living in those norms. And at the end of the book, towards the end of the book, that Lankavatara Sutra is quoted, and Lankavatara Sutra says, this quote says, that compassion comes from wisdom. Of course, wisdom also comes from compassion. But anyway, I just said compassion comes from wisdom, and that for many people over the centuries in China, many people have gone into the mountains in order to find wisdom. They go into the mountains to find wisdom, and when they find wisdom, compassion arises, and then oftentimes they go back into the cities.

[16:04]

So part of the, you know, almost a little bit of a dilemma in my mind is some of you, I think, have come into the mountains now, come into these mountains to find wisdom. And from the wisdom which you hope to find here, I think you hope to find compassion, real compassion, compassion which is not just, again, your idea of compassion, But compassion would come through wisdom, a wisdom that you find by going deep into the mountains. So from ancient times, people have gone deep into the mountains to find tranquility, deep tranquility, deep understanding that comes from a really quiet mind. So I want you to have, I want you, now that you've come into these mountains, I want you to find true tranquility, true serenity.

[17:28]

And some of the people who go into those Jungnan Mountains nowadays, they go into the mountains But they can't find the tranquility, so they go deeper into the mountains. Places where they used to go are still too, for whatever reason, too close to the city for them in a way. So they've even gone deeper into the mountains where no one can find them, where no one can reach. so they can find the tranquility of the deep mountains where you find the wisdom from which Buddha's compassion is born. So the question is, where are these mountains?

[18:40]

How do you go deep into the mountains? Now you're in the mountains, but how can you really go into the mountains now that you're here? How can you find true tranquility? Sometimes it sounds like these people in the mountains are running farther and farther away from any kind of noise. What does it really mean to run away from the noise, to go a place where there is no noise? What does that mean? Where is that place deep in the mountains? So as far as I know, you've all agreed to pretty much stay in this valley rather than run out of the valley to cut into someplace else in the mountains. And if you want to leave the valley and go someplace deeper into the mountains, we'd like you to talk to us beforehand, right?

[19:49]

But in this valley, in the environs of this valley, the question is how to find the real depth of these mountains, the real quiet in your heart. Not a dream of quiet, but a quiet that really is quiet, a quiet that cannot be disturbed. That's part of what I'd like to look at. What does it mean to go into the mountains and find that place where nobody can find anybody? Where you're still there, but nobody can find you. And that place, hopefully, you find wisdom.

[20:56]

You find your true relationship with all beings at that place. I don't know if you want to do that, because it involves It involves, I don't know what, it involves putting your whole heart out for the practice. And we're experimenting with his schedule, so we don't exactly know how it's going to work, in terms of classes and things like that, in terms of how much the kitchen can come to and things like that.

[22:03]

So we'll be trying to find out what works in terms of study. So we're having a kind of a short class today, for about 40 minutes, I guess. Is that right? And then I don't know exactly. We'll work out a schedule about how often we can do this. How long do we have before we should stop? I'll give you a turn. 10 minutes? Hm? OK. I just thought I might mention, since you just came into my head, that from Buddha's point of view we're okay. In Buddha's awakened vision,

[23:19]

Now, all sentient beings look like Buddha's wisdom and compassion, fully embraced by and imbued with and penetrated by Buddha's wisdom and compassion. However, we can also see that the very people who are just fine don't necessarily understand that. because people have attachments and limited views. Even though they're fine, like a beautiful baby, you know, beautiful baby, but still maybe might have some limited fixed idea about who she is. And so these beautiful beings who are just fine are kind of strangling themselves.

[24:20]

with their limited ideas. So this is... Buddha can see this. Perfect, just a fine person, and yet the person is strangling herself. So Buddha wants to unstrangle the person. wants to somehow not exactly pull a person's hands away from her neck or pull his hands away from his neck, but something like that, a little bit like that. Because you can't really pull somebody else's hands away from their neck. They have to take their own hands away, really. Of course, you can pull their hands away from their neck, but they'll just put them back as soon as you walk away. Because people get used to strangling themselves.

[25:27]

So people have gotten used to that. That's their sort of standard way. So they feel uncomfortable when you take their hands away from their neck. There's something missing. But if you can draw people's attention to the fact that they're strangling themselves, they can say, oh, who's doing that? And then they can say, oh, me. Oh, well. I mention that because it came into my mind to say that. And I said it because I see people strangling themselves. And I want to pull their hands away, but I realize it's not my job to pull their hands away. My job is to bring your attention to the fact to whatever extent you're strangling yourself. So you can feel the ways that your ideas of who you are or what practice it is are confining you. Find out in what ways you're restraining yourself. But it's not necessarily pleasant for somebody to assist you in finding this.

[26:34]

It's not necessarily pleasant to become aware of the ways that we're limiting ourselves. But I think it's helpful. Maybe not absolutely necessary, but helpful to become aware of whatever ways your attachments and limited views are limiting you and confining your life. So, part of what I'm here for is to help you find those things. I mean, I like to do that. I like to become aware of this. But again, I warn you that it's not necessarily pleasant, so I need you to encourage me to do you this favor. You don't want me to help you find out how you're limiting your potential. I won't force this on you too much. I just offer this, you know. Like this morning, you know, I went into the kitchen and the Tenzo had a very nice gauze mat with a bowing mat out for me.

[27:44]

Where's the tango? Oh, there he is. And I thought, well, this is unusual. Usually you don't have the bowling mat out there. You just walk in. But I thought, oh, it's really nice that he did this special thing here. Kind of like made me feel very welcome, kind of a special occasion. So I took my Zordas off and walked over the mat and clobbered incense. But then afterwards I said to him, that we talked about that, that this is kind of unusual. And he said, oh, no, I thought we always did that. So we had a little talk about that. And then I went around and talked to some other people about it to see if it's a little reality checking. But this is kind of a natural thing to do, you see, that we have a certain way of doing things. And then he did it a different way so then I could talk to him about it, so he could interact with me. his world and my worlds, both of our worlds started to like turn on each other.

[28:50]

I mean, I didn't know, I wasn't so sure, you know, what world was I living in? Was this Tatsahara or, you know, what do you call it, Robert Holly? You know, and he is wondering too, you know, what's reality, right? And it's not so much that one's right or one's wrong, but rather that there's something, we have these forms, these mountain forms, to relate around, you know, and try to find out, you know, what's happening. And not to come to a conclusion, but rather to ask the question. So I arrived here, I come into this temple, and I ask questions. I come to ask questions. Hopefully about everything. But I won't ask questions about everything you don't want me to. I'll just ask questions about things that kind of like stick up, like bar mats where I don't expect them and stuff like that.

[29:59]

And like I listen to the new doh-ons practicing. They're their way of doing things. I know they're new doh-ons. Oh, new doh-ons do it like that. This is the beginning of the practice, please, so it happens like that. So by the way, John, it's the ten, you know, things for complete practice, not of. For. The food is for the practice. It's not the practice itself. You have to get over that. When you're tenzo, it is. Oh. But then afterwards, it's, or. So I just don't, you know, like, I'm not out to get him. It's just that he said. of instead of for, so I go, of. No, no, for. It's like, you see, it's like that.

[31:02]

It just comes natural. What? What? Because he was ten zone because I've been listening to that chant for a long time. So when he says, when he says, for, of instead of for, I hear, oh. You know. So a lot of stuff just comes up like that. It's not like everybody's out to reverse everybody's reality, right? So she thinks her name's Marcia, so I'm going to go tell her her name's Fred. It's not like that. It's more like just she thinks it's Marcia, and if she says it's Fred, I'm going to say, act like she said your name is Marcia. It's like that. But that happens a lot around here, that people's realities actually do offer themselves up in such a way that you can ask questions about. You don't have to go out of your way. There are opportunities to say, well, actually, what do you mean by that? What's going on here? What's our objective?

[32:02]

What's our ultimate concern? And are we behaving? So again, this morning I adjust posture, right? I give some suggestions to your posture. I'm not correcting your posture. I'm asking you a question. When I adjust your posture, when I touch your back, I'm asking you a question. My question, what is this posture? What do you think of this posture? What posture do you already have? Now, how about this one? What do you think of this one? Sometimes maybe I imagine you think, well, that's not a very good one. The one I had before was better. Well, I like this, but it's hard or whatever. I'm asking you a question, I'm asking you a question, I'm asking you a question. All these forms are ways to ask questions. We have these forms or ways to ask questions about what is really... What are we doing here?

[33:02]

So if you answer these three questions, that'll help me understand whether you want me to keep asking you more questions. And if you don't want me to ask any questions, I hope you have the courage to tell me that, and I'll respect that. If you do want me to ask you questions, I'll try to ask them when I have one. And if you want other people to ask you questions, I'll tell them that you want them to ask you questions, and then they can ask you too. Or you can sing it from the highest hill. Say it at work meeting. Tell people, do you like my driving? And so on. So that's my introduction. Do you have any comments or questions to what I've said so far? Nancy and... I don't know your name. Emanuel.

[34:13]

OK, Nancy and Emanuel. Yes. Yeah. They're just sitting, right? And there's You know, say, shikantaza, just sitting, and then they're going to talk to the teacher about dharma, samsimumpo. There's two aspects. And you go and talk to the teacher about the practice, mostly. the dharma, the dharma of the practice. So those two go together. I think in Zen in general, but particularly Soto Zen would say, just sitting and go talk to the teacher about the practice, about the dharma.

[35:24]

How does just sitting relate to saving all sentient beings? Look two together. One thing, the just sitting is your your intra-psychic work, work just with yourself. And going to talk to the teacher is interpersonal. The self and other interpersonal work complements the intra-psychic work together. But if you go talk to the teacher about your practice, but you don't do any work with yourself, then you're not going to have much to talk about. But if you don't talk to a teacher, you can get into a kind of like enclosed system about your own understanding of what practice is. And then it becomes, loses its full, doesn't have its full vitality. It's still somewhat good, probably. OK. Daniel? What do you need to get our answers to?

[36:27]

Just to write on a piece of paper Bring it to the cabin, or get it to a magician. Or, you know, put it in my mailbox. Do you have a mailbox? Kind of direct to physical muse. Eric? It's interesting, you know, you said I asked you a question, but it's nice, but it's like looking outside the world, but even just asking those questions, you know, it's reasonable. You know, it's interesting, you know. Great. Well, that's why I'm saying this, because I could ask you a question and you might feel as crazy. That's why I want to tell you beforehand that I'd like to know whether you want questions. So sometimes you have to ask people. I have a question for you. Do you want me to ask you? And sometimes they say no. Sometimes people are like, I've got enough to handle, right? I've got enough problems. I don't want any questions from you on top of all my other problems.

[37:30]

But if you ask them, they say, and so they say, no, I don't want to. But then the next day, you say, they might feel more open and feel more up, you know, and not so hassled. And they might say, you know, yesterday you asked about, you asked questions. Well, today I feel up for it. Go ahead. So you... No. Right. And a lot of people come to me and they say, as you watch me practicing, if you see me getting off the track... And I would, you know, off the track that they want to walk on, please give me feedback. And I'd say, okay, I'll try. But sometimes, even when people ask, and I go to ask them, you said you wanted feedback, do you want it? They sometimes say, well, generally speaking, I do, but not today. Or, you know, I change my mind, I don't want feedback. But sometimes it happens. But then usually, even later, they say, I changed my mind. I was just feeling really tense that day, and I just couldn't handle it anymore.

[38:35]

When people are tense, it's hard to get feedback. I feel like they're going to break. And we all get tense sometimes, right? We need a nap. After we take our nap, OK, I can have some feedback, get some comments. So check with people, even people who you have a relationship with where you're trying to help each other. Check with them beforehand, you know, just to say, now, do you want it? Oh, yes, I do. Okay. Anything else this morning? So I'll try to wait to talk to China about China until you come back, let's wait. You'll find out. So how many people do not want to share a word about China?

[39:37]

Raise your hand, please. Okay. So we'll try to work that out to have me and John being able to come, too. Anything else now? So now what, do you have to do a break and then you have study? Is that what happens?

[40:02]

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