Is there anything you'd like to discuss this morning? Yes, sir? I was thinking about the last time we met and also some things that were brought up particularly about, it felt like last time you were addressing our two individuals interact with the people and kind of the way that we see that we're separate and then react to that and talk some key around that. And I felt like, you know, you have to practice with that and really need that.

[01:04]

And I appreciated that, but I felt like it was a good point that Earthman and Dave thought up about institutionalized racism and oppression. There's this point where when we bring up a question or something, but particularly in the context of diversity, racism, homophobia, sexism, and we start talking about chanting, that somehow there's actually a difference that's not being addressed. A difference between me as an individual attracting someone else, because I don't like the way that they chant, but feeling separate from another individual, and the way

[02:08]

that institutions uphold oppression. So I kind of wonder if you could address that, if you'd like addressing it in our institution, the acceptance of programming pleasure, and then should we be addressing it in other institutions, if an institution, is kind of like a reflection of our mind, right? I certainly haven't gotten rid of it. I still feel separate. I'm still deluded in that way. I see separation and I discriminate. And I feel like our institutions are a reflection of that ignorance. So I feel like the precepts are the one way that we can in our delusion, learn how to act in a more soulful way or have a reference point.

[03:10]

And I wonder if you feel like there's any way to have some precepts for our institution or a way to study to look at our institution and see the way it's enriched and changed in the future. Even if I don't understand, I do have a question, and that is, can you express something about the appearance of oppression within the Zen Center institution? Can you say something, can you express something about your sense that there's some oppression in Zen Center, in the Zen Center institution? which is the same as or different from oppression between individuals. Well, the chanting example, I feel like maybe if you were mute, if you could chant,

[04:21]

You may feel like there's institutional oppression because there's this expectation that everybody can't. So if you don't have a voice, maybe there's kind of this assumption that everyone puts a name or an expectation that doesn't count for the fact that you don't have that opportunity, versus any expectation of a given chanting style, which I feel that changes from tanto to tanto, or person to person, or is kind of a more individual thing. So I could say a number of things that I've thought about, which are just that people who are in debt that don't really have the opportunity to live with them because they have no way of taking care of that part of their life when they're here.

[05:24]

So that excludes another number of people. I mean, just looking at that kind of disproportionate number of so-called minorities that are living with them. Would anyone like to respond to Sarah, what she brought up about institutional oppression? Would you welcome that, Sarah? I really like the point, and it's something I thought about. Unless there's so much oppression, it is exclusion. We are excluding a whole group of people. Somehow, as an institution, we're excluding a bunch of people for whatever reason, and we're kind of exploring that. My big concern is, are we going to do anything about it?

[06:26]

Are we going to explore ways that the institution can be more inviting to people of their different colors? Is that part of what you've been saying about institutional exclusion? Yeah, I haven't worked that so much in my life. I feel like the way that we're excluding people. What it looks like is that it kind of mirrors this larger way that our whole culture and society excludes people. And that can be called racism or Anyway, that there's some similarity. So I appreciate what he's saying about exclusion versus oppression, but if our exclusion is contributing to this larger way that we actually exclude whole groups of people, I don't know what the distinction is.

[07:32]

But I also wanted to reiterate the point about I appreciate doing something about it, but I feel like the point I was making was first, I feel like we need to have people in our institution, particularly with authority, both religious and administrative authority, which is either one of them, actually say something about how we need to look at our institution instead of just, instead of, or in addition to looking at things that are related but not exactly the same, such as oppression. I guess maybe what I don't understand is I need help to understand the oppression. That's what I'm asking about.

[08:46]

What is it? How does it appear? How does it come to be? Exclusion is... We could also talk about either the same, maybe it's the same, but also how are we excluding people? Are we excluding people? I'd be happy to hear about how that is. Yes, Aline? One thing, Sarah, I wanted to share with you is that you talked about people not paying them the valuation of moving. It's a lot of work. Do you want to talk about that? For me, one thing about things that I said, in my cooking hall perspective, there's kind of this assumption that everybody's the same. Who would know how to say it? Who would know how to say it?

[09:50]

There are great people in this world who need to find it. There are so many out there who need to find it. There are so many people [...] who need to find it. I think since I started out as a white middle class organization, it's really not that big of a deal to stand alone. That sort of excludes some people on it. Do other people, do you have something to say about Arlene's feeling that there's an assumption that we're all the same? Do other people sense that? But my comments, she probably didn't.

[10:54]

I would say that it generally depends. Yes and yes. I'm going to just speak, even though my thoughts aren't fully well formed. One little way I see it, which is necessarily so little, at the front desk of City Senate, it seems to me that by not... giving the people in that front space first encounter place special training around receiving all kinds of people who come to the door is a way that our institution

[12:04]

It isn't like a racist action. It's kind of could be oppressive in its omniscient. And I say that because in the trainings and study and everything that we've been doing over the last few years, I've come to see in myself really ugly, unconscious, habitual ideas and thoughts. that I'm sure are felt by others. And if we don't help the people who are welcoming those who come to help them see that so that it's not just spilling out, in their behavior toward people, that feels to me like a kind of institutional racism or institutional economic prejudice.

[13:19]

Yes, please. I think one of the major questions is, to me, the policy of dominance. So if there's a predominance, if there's a predominantly particular kind of group in an institution, that's what the institution are intended to be. So for instance, I think is, in a way, predominantly heterosexual. So there's sometimes heterosexism. And because of that, because of the thinking that everybody's moving and thinking in that way,

[14:27]

So it draws more of the same kind of people. And say this were a Zen center. I don't know about maybe Parker Street. I've never been to Parker Street. But maybe there where there are more of the gay, lesbian, queer society that it draws predominant there, too, where maybe some of the heterosexuals may be experiencing some oppression because of the dominant. So I think that a lot of times if you're on the side of how can we be more kind and more friendly when we still haven't really dealt with how we're suffering from hatred, that we feel It can just come up just nearly all, you know, look at the language, you know, things get decided for a long time.

[15:29]

You know, I don't, I've been on the streets, and it's decided me somehow, it raises people, you know, so, in my life, I have experienced that as a child. So, I think, yeah. When I talk about oppression, I'm thinking about that kind of, it's like how an illness kind of gets into, you know, community and kind of epidemic and everybody's feeling it and everybody touches it. You know, that's what oppression feels like to me. And then, you know, then it will suffer. you know, and so . And so that's why when we talk about diversity, sometimes we miss that point that there is some suffering going on on various levels, typically race, gender, class, and sexual orientation. And it's sometimes hard to speak to because it

[16:34]

It requires having a special group like this rather than it being part of the ongoing practice. I don't know how it could be that without making it a separate situation. I don't have an answer to that. But I think it's also good to have a separate situation when we talk about it. But eventually, it should begin to permeate into the whole institution. I think that's what Sarah's talking about, where there's some kind of mind consciousness. And I think that's where the dark comes in, where I'd like to hear you talk about more is how can we shift that so that the institution is reflective of that mind consciousness. whether, you know, we don't feel another hatred.

[17:43]

And I don't think it's really like a clean cut, like, show me the oppression. It's because oppression's kind of, like, I try to define it every day. It's really hard to even define it and say it's something. It's like that illness, like trying to find a giardia. Where is it? You know? You know, you just can't fight it, but you know very well it's here. If we were suffering, you know, and we can all get it, maybe now, maybe later. You know, stuff like that. It's kind of, it's, if you lose the bit, it has, it has a space and time that moves. That shifts. If we were here, we'd be over there. We distance the bit from nothing. So you can't even say, oh, that's it, so every time I see that, that's it. I see some hands, but we're going to practice maybe having some space around.

[18:46]

Would the people who have spoken like to hear if there's any response to what you said? Anything you'd like to say in response to what's been said? Yes and yes? I think I would like to respond to this what this comment that we're all the same or we assume we're all the same and then for me how it meets what Earth Planet was just saying about this elusive quality and is here, it's there. I'm feeling a little vulnerable, actually, because I feel like my ignorance is about to just be all over the place.

[20:09]

Because in some ways I feel like, in terms of the Dharma or practicing, we are all the same. I'm actually kind of practicing when I look at people and I think, and I can see where my protective shield comes in, but I'm practicing as if we're all the same, like as if we all have these discriminating minds and we're all going to at some point take our last breath and no matter what we did or said or whatever, it's, you know, I mean, these things do have repercussions. but still everybody is good so for me in some ways from a dharmic point of view i feel like i am looking as if it's the same and not emphasizing the difference because the difference is everywhere so i'm not kind of sure exactly

[21:11]

I feel like the Zazen that we're doing and the teaching that we have allows us to sit in the middle of our discriminations. I feel like we saw that during the Sashin, where people could see their roots, where they came from, and what they brought to it. But to me, that's like practicing when we're all the same. I mean, with our different minds. So in fact, in some ways, I do practice as if we're all the same and not different. Yeah. Maybe I can say more, but I think I'd just leave it at that. You know? Someone should like some response. Sure. Or some response to what Simu said. Yes. Well, I think both are true. You know, I think what you're saying is It is really beautifully spoken, a feeling that I have often, too, that in our discriminating, in our suffering, we are the same.

[22:26]

Where I've seen that become a problem in an institutional setting is, and I've read this like in Letter to the Editor Wars and Buddhist journals, where, well, because we're the same, therefore, the voice of the writer will say, you know, the letter writer, you don't have the right to complain about say, sexism. And I'm not saying you're saying that at all. I'm just saying that that's why I think it's important to recognize both the difference and the unity, because sometimes difference is the thing to focus on and acknowledge, yes, an experience you came because of the way that this institution or someone's comments are making me lesser. And it is also true that we are not different. You know, I think people do things with these truths that then become where the problems are.

[23:32]

So that's one of the roses on the leaves I'm listening to you say. Thank you. It's not like I would say I haven't experienced the pain of feeling separate here from various angles or not included, the pain of that. And so I guess a little bit confusion for me is I think what you're saying is true, and my actual experience in day-to-day life and what other people are bringing up is accurate. And from a dharmic point of view, which I feel like we're trying to put out there, is how and what is the same or you know the unity part of it is where we're all working together so maybe this is just not just the venue to bring up the pain of where we still feel separate or

[24:43]

not included, to come back together, to affirm where we're the same. I don't know, I'm starting to get into muddy water, but anyway, I feel like we need a place to address the pain and to remember that we're all kind of holding it together. Somehow that's the edge we're working. Honest? Responding to Sarah's original comments at first, I thought that the thought came to me that any individual or any organization simply by existing oppresses in a myriad of small or bigger ways. For instance, I as an individual, just by driving my car around, oppress other people because they breathe the fumes.

[25:48]

Or by consuming food, resources, natural resources, I'm creating some pollution that oppresses other people. Or by folding a good job and making more money than some other people, I'm oppressing them somehow. by not speaking out about that oppression, economic oppression within the social system, I am oppressing other people in many subtle ways. Therefore, also any organization does the same thing. Innumerable ways of oppression, something always happening. And of course, as individuals and as organizations, we are also helping other people in innumerable ways by offering our work to society, by offering some teaching, some help, many things.

[26:58]

So Zen Center, there are many, many subtle and not so subtle ways that it may be oppressing people. There are sins of commission and sins of omission. So there are many things we could think about, but it might be a very practical exercise for us right here to decide to talk about, to figure out what's the one biggest offense of commission or omission. from Zen Center towards the people of Zen Center or towards society at large? What's the one real, most obvious or most important offense? And of course, the point being,

[28:03]

Then to try and address it and correct it or be aware of it. Could we do that exercise here? Any response to that? Yes. Well, when I... I think what you're saying reminds me of what came along with Simon talking and Sarah talking about being seen as being the same. And I always saw it as, you know, as I was here, I realized, my God, who's dreamed up this system of training anyway? It seems like it's really geared for a 19-year-old who loves helping new boys. And what I noticed is, you know, in the city was that I was supposed to hold everybody in that building accountable to one way of doing things, one schedule.

[29:07]

And what I found was, It's not just one population in that building. It's several populations. People that live up, people that, you know, live there but work outside, being one, it comes to mind. And then it's that they couldn't really do it, but they were still held to that standard. And also often scolded, you know, the whole business. A whole lot of pressure put on them. And when I was up there just a little while ago, some of my students I trained to be chaplains, which I consider just a terrific thing to be doing in terms of actually getting out there and doing dharma. And even the one who is able to keep the schedule completely, second class. And the other one, also about second class, something was not quite right about them.

[30:11]

They weren't able to be first class, because they weren't doing the domain thing, was my impression. So. I hope to talk with them. I'm sorry, up there, about that. I think that's a mistake, that particular one. That's all I can say on that one. Oh, except for, can everyone do the same thing? Which is, well, during that occasion, we say, well, I know they have a real bad meaning and all this, and we go, oh, yeah, it's okay, it's okay. Then when we're here and we actually manifest not being 19, it's really easy to slip into boy, this is an estate having men here, wasn't it? Or they were there at Burton, or something like that. And they killed.

[31:12]

And we, the ill ones, can kill that, too. So, thanks. Kate? I have a comment. I think I really want to do that. Do you think I can speak directly to it? You can keep your voice up. We can't hear you if you face the other way, unless you talk really loud. I'll talk loud. Thank you. When you were saying you can't really pinpoint oppression, I felt in accord with that. And I think that the problem with almost any But I think we can feel when we're uncomfortable with something that happens.

[32:14]

And this is also in line with what you asked Sarah in the beginning, is how does the oppression appear? So I think we would maybe dig a little deeper into the problem If instead of trying to talk about oppression, we try to talk about actually what behavior happened or didn't happen that created the pain, or that triggered, stimulated the pain. So that's a suggestion I have. And I don't want to undermine that there is a authentic, you know, in our culture and in our institutions that these Behaviors form patterns and deep unconscious habits and the huge pain. I don't want to undermine that. However, I think we'll touch it more closely if we actually describe what comes in through our senses, what we see, hear, etc., rather than using the label of oppression, which you never know.

[33:30]

You can't find it with what you describe. You all right? So that is the suggestion that I put out. I'd like to hear if there's any response to what she said. I have responses to earlier comments. Should I wait on those? I... Yeah, go ahead. Really, she said. You can be impressive. Well, in terms of Janice's suggestion to try and find the one thing, I guess I feel like there's some problems with that, in terms of, I mean... I think one problem with it is that, in some ways, the thing that we might be the most blind to is not represented in this room.

[34:37]

So I guess I don't want to try and find, I just want to be open to looking at this in ourselves and open to hearing what people receive and finding out more and more about ways in which the zone center on the institutional and individual level might be enacting oppression. So that's kind of my feeling there. And then in terms of what Sonya was saying, I guess I feel like there's, different kinds of sameness that are being talked about. So there's I feel like honoring difference goes with seeing that we're all really deeply appreciating the humanity of everyone, so that we are all the same as being total human beings. And then that would just go with honoring difference and honoring individuality and honoring the ways of each person's integrity, whereas I think the difference, the sameness that that we bring up sometimes, to me anyway, in this kind of context of oppression has to do with expecting everyone to fit into a norm, and then the norm is made up of mostly who's in the room.

[35:48]

So if it's mostly white people, white people get a bunch of white people together. If they don't look at it, the norm is just going to be that white culture, white ways of acting, expression, and so on. And then I think that can form an expectation that just makes people feel invisible or uninvited to express themselves, which I think can be a big problem. Yes, I'll get over here. No, not anymore. Simon? I wanted to say something about the language, the difference between sameness and non-separate. And then Cathy and Sonia were talking, and Cathy said, you know, find a place where there's not difference, or see not difference.

[36:53]

And I thought, for me, it's more like see the difference and acknowledge the non-separation. And to me, that's a really The language around that seems kind of up in the air. And another thing was at the end of the last class, something came up in that we were, there's something around asking for support, and so I say something, and I'm like, do other people feel like that? And I ask a question. And I had sense that if no one said, yeah, I feel like that, I might think that I'm not being supported. But actually, that may not be the case. It may be that by the difference of people not agreeing with me or not treating me the same way, that may be support. And I guess I was struck by how easy it is for me to feel separate from people who aren't overtly treating me the same way or agreeing with me.

[38:02]

and how I have to like really kind of work at not seeing that as separation but just seeing it as difference or seeing it as different. And often in group environments I feel a reserve about disagreeing, about stating my difference from If someone comes forward and says, this is how I am right now, and this is what I think, I feel a reserve to say, I feel different. I feel a kind of group mentality of agreeing to support that person rather than disagreeing to support that person. So I'm going to kind of put that out there. I guess it's an encouragement for myself to be more forthright in expressing difference as a way of supporting myself and other people. Gabe?

[39:15]

This picks up on the things that a lot of different people have been saying. I kind of like to be honest, I started growing a dog like that. That's the main thing. I want to go back to what Sarah and Steven were talking about with oppression and exclusion. It seems to me that oppression has to do with power. And I think that one of the things that power does is exclusion. So people get excluded from jobs or educational opportunities in certain neighborhoods or whatever, I think that's a question. I think we live in a society, and as far as I know, every society on Earth has been like this. where some people have more power than other people. So groups and institutions exclude certain people. So is that a sign of disinformation? I think we're excluding certain people. I sort of look around, and this doesn't actually look like this country. I think that's fine. I think that's the people.

[40:17]

So I guess what I want to say is that, yeah, I think really deeply that exclusion gives a kind of oppression. And if I had to sort of say what, as an institution, maybe the most guilty of it, I think that's maybe the most obvious. That's the one that I was struck by in myself. I think we're good. OK. I'm going to address something Jane said, which also I think other people have talked about, which is, what I heard Jane say was, since it's very difficult to identify, since oppression moves, that to pay attention to our sense of our experience of what's happening is a way to, I guess, to connect with other people. It's kind of how I interpret it, what you said.

[41:29]

Kind of my experience, I want to share my experience with this. It's actually, I've noticed a process of sensitizing myself to situations that other people might experience as oppressive in order to be available to be a, the term ally comes to mind, or a friend when there's pain experience. um as an institution and i think we're i think as an as an institution we're in this process this actual meeting and these kinds of discussions are part of the process of uh as a group of people becoming more sensitive so that there is a place for when people feel oppressed that they feel that they can express that um because if uh it helps to balance the power imbalance or

[42:35]

Changes the power balance when more people are able to express themselves about their experience particularly of oppression and feel heard and acknowledged For what they're experiencing and everybody in this room has a part to play in that and so However, it is a process of becoming more sensitive. I'm recalling something that happened in the summer where, in a large group of people, something was said by a teacher that most people missed as being oppressive, but one person was hurt by it. And that person had the courage to say something in the room, and then other people could hear how this person was hurt. And then other people were able to come up and say, oh, yeah, I feel that pain, too. that courage to express it and the ability for other people to respond with, oh yeah, I feel your pain, allowed for that person to not feel shut down or totally excluded or felt like she felt like she had community.

[43:43]

And I think that's vital as an institution and as individuals in addressing oppression because it is so amorphous. I hope you're hearing any response to that. Do you want to respond yet? Yep. I feel encouraged by the lean here. I feel like the error in what I was saying, because it leans too much in the wisdom realm or emptiness or sameness, And that is a place where it's hard for people to speak up.

[44:51]

And we have a silence practice so that it took taking some courage for people to speak up here. I remember what Tim was noticing, and I remember hearing it and just kind of doing an internal practice. something with it, but not saying something out. So maybe what I hear is that we're encouraging ourselves to kind of get a little muddy, you know, instead of kind of hanging out here in silence or reflection or something to that effect. And I felt like the teacher in that circumstance actually upheld, I'm going to call it the wisdom of the silent, just said thank you, but did not actually meet the comment of the person.

[45:53]

So I feel like that's the air, and maybe that's the gross omission, commission that we participate in, this kind of airing, or hanging air in this wisdom realm of saying this or something. And I feel like kind of Tim's bringing up this experience, the kind of culmination of my saying, yeah, let's kind of get in here. working with our hands instead of hanging out in our mind, my mind. To breathe in. Breathe in. I'd go right around and then I'd go watch it and then I'd move this chair.

[47:00]

And then she'd go like this. She'd go like this. Do you want to offer your turn to Leslie? Yes, I'd like to hear it with Leslie. Okay. Is that okay, Leslie? Yeah, I'd like to hear it with Leslie. I really appreciate the people who I feel like have been asking for specifics. Several people have been asking for specifics, and when Erzman, when he said he prepared this to Giardia, I felt like, yes, but when we're looking for Giardia or oppression, knowing who has diarrhea and what they're doing, It's really helpful. And I want to say, as a senior person at STEM Center, it might be hard to get on to too much.

[48:05]

Some people have been bringing them up, and I appreciate that. And it might be hard to go into one thing specifically. in this meeting, but I want to, as a senior person that's not here, I want to invite people to please, I would like to know, if I'm around for pain that happens, that I might be able to help Zen Center address, or us address at Zen Center, that I'm interested in that. And to bring up the time in the city, I mean, excuse me, the time this summer, And the specifics, you know, make it really evident to me how difficult this book is, because in that group, to stay, I don't even know what I was going to say, stay open to the various experiences that were happening on the other side, but maybe our difference doesn't allow us to do that. Maybe it has to be a messier than that.

[49:06]

We actually do empathize more with one person than with another. live there without getting polarized. I don't know. Like, maybe just have to jump in and see what happens. Sorry? Sorry, I actually have to leave the sojourner kitchen. Okay. Siobhan? Max? As well, I was relieved and also going out to speak to the C-Center and the front door, they have a strong idea about what I can do at the front door for Trinity. So it's not simply for going into the air, but we're very interested in supporting that. And I feel like I've experienced some separation down here recently, the comments that people have made about sexuality, mine, and even about what I count on.

[50:19]

And I don't really feel that so much in my life. And it's been kind of startling and uplifting to realise that that, you know, as a light, you will go to the moon. It happened at this moment, being manifesting as I've been, which is a very small part of who I am, on the continuum of being a secular being. Yeah, it's been really upsetting, you know, getting hurt, and the comments that I made always make me jealous, and they never, never made it hurt. And I could go into specifics, but I'm not sure about that. The point of that, the reason why I want to bring up that paper, often comments like an evil jest can really hurt. And mine too. I say that to myself as well, because I've also to make hurray remarks to be just, which really hurt.

[51:23]

I mean, like, [...] Is this an example of a pain that we can address? Would this be an example of what Tim and Jane were talking about, an actual pain that we can address, maybe? It could be. If we actually wanted to do that, it might help to share Norman's comments for us. It might help to hear more in detail. Do you think that might be a good exercise for us? Who else is involved? It might depend here and . . . Well, so Shivan brought this up, and then I asked if this would be an example, to work on a concrete example rather than maybe the most important example, but just anyway a particular one that we could focus in on and look at how we take care of particular problems like this.

[52:47]

But then people realize that it needs maybe more space than we have right now. But this maybe could be worked on later if we clarify whether Siobhan wants to work on it in a situation like this, whether the person who is involved wants the discussion to happen in Solomon. But I just wanted to notice that this might be an example of something that you can actually exercise on. Maybe not the most important example, One that just happens to be right in our face right now, because someone's bringing it up. Is that right? OK, so maybe you could look for another time to bring it up to work on, go back to it. And then we can see that people can bring up this kind of thing to the group, and the group can help support developing or dealing with that problem, but also developing a way of dealing with problems like this.

[53:55]

OK, next. Sorry, a couple things. Yannis was saying, you know, what's the name? For me, probably, you know, it would be economics, I think, just because it's somewhat expensive to come, say, when I do the sessions, I don't know, to do the thing, which I'm here for the day of the week. I couldn't do all that. And then also using work that week, I think that's a part that's difficult for a lot of people who are doing this retreat, just $1,000 submitting this work and so forth. So I think that's part that people were struggling. And then the other thing that I was just thinking about was that, so I spent the last year living at Hartford Street, which is a temple designed to support the gay lesbian community. And I'm like, okay, man. And it's interesting that I was very supportive there, but I also did feel, I don't know what it was, but I felt something like, you know, people have mentioned that I, couldn't know to be a person there to, you know, move up and be like, so I can't, I mean, I don't want, I'm not gay, you know, so it's sort of, anyway.

[55:06]

And you see, they asked what? You know, like, I was to become a person, like a, you know, not in leadership, or like on the board of directors or something. Oh, I see, you thought you couldn't, I never sort of felt like I fit in. Oh, I see. I mean, I tried to, you know, when I was going to the game for hours. I tried. I tried. You know what I mean? I tried. Anyway. But you don't... But it's not necessary. You don't need to be the person to be on the board, though, right? No, you don't. But I do feel... You felt... There's some sort of, you know... Like, there'd be comments, like, oh, is that what breeders say? You know, or something like that. Or, is that person a friend of Dorothea? You know what I mean? And there's comments that get thrown around. And breeders, breeders being heterosexual, you know? And they're just joking. I can take that. But that's the point. That's the point. That stuff is thrown around. And I don't think, that's an example maybe that, yeah, they don't do it. There is some, maybe I could give some sort of oppression there.

[56:10]

But I really support the way the game is created and it's set up to really support a lot of Korean fans that can be equal, but are also like, but yet they can't leave. But yet I know the product of one of the characters, but I need to be there. So anyway, this community maybe, is it there? Anyway, I don't know. That's it. I hope that helped. It's really so cool, sorry, but that's what I feel most of my life, what you're experiencing, what you experienced that year. Right. Not being welcome, not fitting in. Right. But how truly tremendous of a story you have to have that experience. Yes. I know one thing that was... It was very painful for me moving in for three months. Instead, I was fascinated by the world.

[57:15]

I felt like, by looking around, I was like, well, I know I'm the only black person, but I need to get a robe, so I could feel like it fit me in. So I went through all this trouble to go get a robe, to go get a black robe. And I noticed a couple of my friends later on that I met at Dream Dogs, they were still in the same way. It's like, well, why come we're supposed to stop awful robes for people? that steady better for a long time. Why do we have to go through all this pain and struggle just to get a robe, just to feel like that, and be a part of the Sunday? I know that was a big thing for me, trying to scrape up the money to just get the robe. Just being, you know, the only black there, you know, that's the thing about when you're the leader of a place, you're really new. to a certain stage how I fit in, then you go do, you know, strenuous things.

[58:20]

And I just really, I don't know, I felt like that, oh, it wasn't the song that I liked anymore. I just noticed that, you know, one of the things there, when I was there for a long time, And it's like, if you look at the world, you know, it's black. It's all black. It's really tricky. It's really hard to deal with this information thing. And, you know, men just question, you know, when is this? How do we know how to fit in? And what do you do to fit in? And it can be really painful. Yeah, so now the bell's ringing, we want to fit in. Anyway, I just, I guess I feel like I appreciate that people could express themselves and listen to each other.

[59:28]

And I hope we continue to express ourselves and listen to each other.

[59:39]

@Transcribed_v005
@Text_v005
@Score_71.88