The Buddha defined karma as, you use a Sanskrit word? Yeah. Karma means, the usual English translation is action. And it has basically three kinds of karma, body, speech, and mind. And the definition of karma is, the Buddha said, used the Sanskrit word chetana. And chetana means action. It can be translated as intention, will, volition, thinking, thinking. And I would also translate it as story. I would define it as story. Karma, action, is story.

[01:02]

And there is other types of activity in the world, in the universe, besides this kind of karma that the Buddha was concerned with. This kind of karma is, this kind of activity is activity which has moral consequence. It has moral consequence. It has evolutionary consequence. So the stories in our mind are a moral issue, have moral consequence, and they arise as a consequence of past stories, past intentions, past thinking. That's kind of a basic teaching from the founder of the tradition. And so now we have a class to study karma.

[02:04]

or to study stories. And during the class, constantly, in each of our minds, stories are arising. Every moment, pretty much. There are exceptions, rare exceptions. When the mind is not active, you know, actively creating a story. But very, very, very rare that the mind is turned down that far that it doesn't have any activity. And the activity of the mind, the activity of consciousness, is karma. And there's some story there. And another way to define story is story is a cognitive version or a cognitive representation of our relationship with each other. And each other, I'm speaking to you when I say each other.

[03:09]

And I'm speaking to beings that aren't in this room. And I'm speaking also by each other. I'm speaking of the walls and the ceiling and the electricity. And I'm speaking of our relationship with the entire world our mind creates an in-house version of that, which we have found useful in our moral evolution from beginningless time. And we aren't the only beings that are storytellers. Other animals and plants do this too. And And there's a tendency for us to be confused about our stories and think our stories about our relationship with each other is our relationship with each other. But that's not right.

[04:11]

Our stories are not separate from our relationship with each other, but our stories do not actually encompass and reach the fullness and reality of our relationship with each other. Nonetheless, we are doing this and we're prone to believe our stories about our relationship with others. And believing the stories, I believe them as something other than story, believe them as reality. Like I have a story that you're my good friend, which is true, but the story I have about our friendship is not our friendship. Our friendship is our friendship and my story about it is not our friendship. Our friendship includes my story of our friendship and our friendship includes your story of our friendship. Even if your story of our friendship is that we're not friends, it still includes that and it includes everybody else's story and their relationship with everybody else.

[05:20]

That's our actual relationship, but our story may not include even somebody that we feel close to. They may have a story which is different from our story and we think theirs is wrong and ours is right, maybe, because we think ours is reality. So this is a basic problem. Plus, the stories tend to then, once they're believed, they tend to make us prone to more stories and more belief in stories and so on. So we're trying to care for stories, which means be aware of them in such a way that we will not be fooled by them anymore, or we will not fool ourselves, or we will not be fooled to believe stories are realities more than stories. And rather than try to stop telling stories, which some people think would be the way to go, which would be another special story, which a lot of people have that story, they're trying to stop their storytelling, rather than that, try to care for our storytelling in a way that allows us to hear the Dharma.

[06:45]

So for a lot of you this is a review and for some of you this may be something of new information and we can go over this in many ways throughout the time together in the future. And one other story I just thought I might mention at the beginning of this series of classes is a story about two approaches to Zen. One is called Tathagata Zen, which is sometimes called Buddha Zen. Tathagata is one of the epithets for a Buddha. A Buddha, Tathagata means both one who comes from suchness, who comes from the way things are, and who goes actually goes well into the way things are, one who goes forth into the way things are and then comes from the way things are.

[08:03]

That's tathagata. It's a being who has entered reality and now comes from reality to to offer us access to where he or she came from. That's tathagata. So one kind of Zen is called tathagata Zen. Another kind of Zen is called ancestral Zen, or sometimes used to be called patriarch Zen or patriarchal Zen. And there are two approaches within the so-called Zen tradition. These are two approaches. two kinds of two Zen approaches. So the Tathagata Zen is the kind of Zen where you're receiving teachings, you're receiving the Buddhist teachings, and you receive them

[09:05]

in the mode of reality. And you receive them in the mode of a concentrated state. So that's one approach to our practice is to be in a state of, is to enter the state of reality and the state of reality receive the Dharma. Train ourselves to open to reality, enter reality, and receive the teaching, or open to the teachings and enter reality, and then continue to receive teachings in the context of having a body and mind that have entered into reality. Another approach which doesn't have any conflict with this, but another approach is to, in some sense, you know, actually now that I say this, in some sense it's a little bit like, to talk to Zen is a little bit like how to go to suchness, how to enter suchness, live there and receive the teachings and deepen the understanding of teachings, having gone to the way things are and being immersed in the way things are.

[10:21]

And the other kind is more like the coming from suchness, coming from suchness, demonstrated, enacted in relationship between student and teacher, teacher and student, acted out, and also in daily life, where the student-teacher thing maybe isn't formalized. And in a way, this class is more on the ancestral Zen type of approach. And then maybe like in the Zen-do, when you're quiet and still, or even walking in meditation and not really kind of like emphasizing your, not acting out so much your relationship, but more like opening and immersing in your relationships.

[11:28]

So, but in this class we're a little bit more on the side, but not excluding the other side, so you're welcome, any of you are welcome to be totally immersed in reality in this class and hear and listen to the Dharma which is coming through the situation here. But here we have the opportunity to act it out. Act out reality. It's an opportunity. Not to say we'll be able to do it fully, but there's an opportunity to do that in this arena. Someone told me about a friend who... wrote a book and in the book this person actually wrote down, in a sense, the truth of a relationship.

[12:45]

However, the person who wrote down the truth, I mean, the person who was like a key vehicle, a key player in the writing down the truth of the relationship, wasn't fortunate enough to have had the truth which she articulated sink into her. It went through her. there was a relationship and the truth of the relationship went through her into the book. And it's in the book. But it's not in the person who wrote the book. That person couldn't let it into them, into themselves, into himself. This is possible in this world, that the truth comes through you Just like I often use the example, you know, my father probably transmitted polio from my uncle to me.

[13:58]

My uncle got polio just before I did. My father went to visit him, and my father came home and I got polio. Being a baby, I got a different kind of manifestation than my uncle, but my father didn't get sick. But he probably brought me the virus. Maybe he didn't, but it does happen that way. You understand? You can carry it without it sinking into you and pass it on. So I thought that was a good example in daily life stories that somebody actually is a vehicle for the truth, truth is coming through them, but doesn't sink into them, and somebody else actually can see it, and they actually could see it, but they couldn't allow it to come into themselves. So that is a basic proposal of, for example, the Book of Serenity. The first case of the Book of Serenity is about this suchness that's coming to you from the Tathagata, pretty much non-stop.

[15:10]

It's coming to you. Suchness is being delivered to you and to me. It's coming through us. And in the verse of the first case, the first story of the Book of Serenity, the verse starts out by saying, the unique breeze of reality. Do you see it? The breeze is flowing, but do you see it? And the story I wanted to bring up here is the 38th story in the Book of Serenity, which in English goes something like this. There was a teacher named Lin Ji. And he said something like, there is a true person of no rank constantly going out and in of all the portals of your face.

[16:11]

Beginners who haven't met this true person, please look, look. And that's the proposal, that this true person of no rank is going out and in your eyes, your ears, your nose, your tongue, your skin. Did I get them off? and your mind. It's going in and out, out and in, constantly. And if you haven't seen it before, please look. But the main point here is how to enact, in the ancestral Zen, is how to enact this true person that's going in and out of us all the time. So that's my invitation to you for tonight.

[17:22]

And for this class, I used to let you ask questions from your seat, and now I ask you not to ask from your seat, but just come up any time you want to and express yourself to me and the group. you're invited to do so. And if you wish, in the context of this true person of no rank that's going in and out of you all the time, please come and act it out. And you don't have to raise your hand, you can just come up And you don't have to wait for the last person to go away. What do you call it? The horse can arrive before the donkey leaves. It's your person.

[18:34]

You can't get a foothold. Thank you. Without my action? Did you hesitate? Not that I noticed. Well thank you. I'm too shy to come up here Where's your husband?

[20:17]

He's making tomorrow's lunch Thank you. Is this person of no rank Linda or Susan?

[21:40]

Do you know now? I don't care. Really? Yeah. Wow. Really? Did something change? Yeah. What? That I don't care. It just fell away. Oh. Thank you, Linda. Good.

[23:03]

How do you feel? Pretty good. May I adjust your haircut? Uh-huh. It's not good. What? So does this mean I'm done for the rest of the class now? I don't know what this means. What do you think it means besides that possibility? Well, I'm not sure. I might have to learn to be an actress or something. You want to learn to be an actress? No. You don't want to learn to be an actress? No. What do you want to learn? How do you drop my stories?

[24:03]

Or not be so attached to them? How to drop your stories or not be so attached to them? Okay. And have you heard that acting them out will help you drop them? Uh... I guess I have. Okay. And now that you've heard that and you think you have, plus you just heard it now, I would suggest to you that acting out your stories will help them drop away. Is there any story you'd like to act out right now besides that one, the one about not being an actress? Would you please act out not being an actress? Would you do that one? Act out not being an actress. Come on, do it. Come on, show people not being an actress. Not being an actress? Show them not being an actress. Act that out now. I need a script, so they have to give me a script.

[25:07]

I'll read the script. Okay, the script is, I'm not an actress. I'm not an actress. And I'm going to act that out wholeheartedly. And I'm going to act that out wholeheartedly. And did you manage to act it out wholeheartedly? Yeah, I mean, I like being up here. It's really nice to see everybody's faces and it's really comfortable and it's great. So maybe I do want to become an actress. That's great. Oh, yeah, yeah. That's right. When you're an actress, you get a lot of attention, which will help you be wholehearted. Yes, Nate. Are you this person of no rank? Are you serious? Huh? Huh?

[26:08]

do you have any feedback for me I think you're doing a fine job I think you're doing a fine job too Simon Please come up here. Do you want to do something with that? Where is authenticity? Where is it? Show me. Where isn't authenticity?

[27:27]

Show me where it is. Show it to me now. Now. Do you not see it? Now. Show it to me. Again. Show it to me again. Again. Do you not see it? I do. Do you see it? Yes. Show it to me. Show me what you see. Show me what you see. Now do it again. Are you showing me? I missed a little bit. Oh. Very good. Want to try again? It's not about trying. I know. Now show it to me. Hello.

[28:36]

Hello, Lori. Hello, Red. Are you here? Now I am. How about now? Yes. Okay. So do you have anything you want to tell me? My brother is dying. Your brother's dying? I feel sad. You feel sad? I appreciate you telling me that. Thank you for hearing that. Does your brother know that you're telling me this?

[29:38]

No. Or perhaps. Where does he live? Florida. Florida. Does he have a story? Probably. Do you have a story? You don't have a story? No. You don't? Is that your story? Right now. And how do you take care of that story right now? I'm talking to you about it. What did you say?

[30:42]

I think I'm fine. You think you're fine? What do you mean? That I'm ready to sit down. Are you ready to stand up too? Sure. Okay. Would you sit down? Right here? Sure. Thank you. Is that right? Mm-hmm. Okay. Would anyone like to come up now, come forth? Yeah, come on.

[31:44]

You can both come. I have a story that I don't dare to come up. And I have a story that I probably shouldn't say anything at this moment. I have a story in that I would like to come up and say something really smart or ask something really smart.

[32:45]

You have a story like that? No, but I like it. I like to do... You have a story you like to say something smart or do something smart? How was that? Was that fairly smart, according to your story? That's how I tried to get rid of that story. I tried to get rid of that story. You tried to get rid of the story of I'd like to do something smart story? Okay. So I thought I'm going to try this. See if I can let it go. Let go of the story of trying to get rid of the story and the story, the original story, you mean? Let go of both of them? Yes. How is it?

[33:49]

It feels heavy in the feet and in the hand. You feel some heaviness in your feet and your hands? and weakness in the belly and loveliness in the heart. Okay. Do you feel like you're expressing the heaviness in the hands and the heaviness in the feet? And what was it, the stomach again? Wait, are you expressing that weakness? My hands are sweaty and my heart is beating very fast. I'm terrified of this game. You're terrified of this game? What is this game, by the way?

[34:50]

You don't know? But can you move your arm and open this thing? Here. Would you please sit down? Can I help you in some way? I don't know. Can I help you express yourself fully? Please. I invite you to express your terror fully. I don't understand it. You don't have to understand it. Just try to express it fully. Okay. I should say take a quick try. Please express it fully. I can't.

[36:00]

Can I help you? Okay. Express it fully. One, two, three. Fully. Was that it? No? How's the terror? Still there. Okay, express it fully. Still there. Is it expressed fully? Fully. I don't think so. I don't think so either. Come on, do it. Yeah, that's good. Is that good? Feels better. Yeah. So in this class you can do that. Now, Zendo, it's controversial, but if you want to express your terror, you're welcome to do so.

[37:03]

Want to try again? Some other way or the same way? I think it's gone. It's gone, yeah. Right. Pretty much. Any left? Maybe some left. Well, express it. Come on, express it. What is it? Let's try some other one, maybe. More. Manfred, did you say your name's Mani? Did you say Mani earlier? Mani? Okay. This is Manny. Do you know each other? Well, obviously it's a shadow, but I'm not sure. I just wanted to say I'm not feeling so verbal, but I'm feeling very tender-hearted towards you.

[38:05]

All of you. Good. We're happy that you're... Did you hesitate there, by the way? Towards feeling tenderhearted? No. No. For bowing. Yeah, bowing you hesitated? Okay, try again. I'm not sure why I'm coming out. Me neither, but now that you're here, what would you like to express? Well, I have trust that this is helpful. So standing up here, I'm kind of facing those anxieties, fears, or stories.

[39:12]

seems like a helpful thing to do. I'm not sure why. I have some sense of it, but I think it's a good thing. You think it's a good thing to come up here and express how you're feeling? I do. It's like facing a fear in some way. I think so, too. What is your Dharma name, Joe? Abhayachandra. What does it mean? Fearless moon. What does it mean? Go ahead. What does that mean? I don't know. Something like facing reality. Possibly. Facing your fears.

[40:15]

being tender with your stories. I don't think I can get rid of my story. They get rid of themselves. Or rather, all beings will help your stories go away and will give you more to take care of. Tenderly? Tenderly is hard. Tenderly is hard, but Do you feel the vow to be tender, to be tender with your stories? Yeah. Thank you. You're welcome. Robin, would you sit in that chair, please? Would you hold this, please? Lynn, would you sit in this chair, please?

[41:23]

Who was just about to come up? Yes, Elena? Were you going to come up? Elena? Were you coming up? Okay, come on. Please come. I have a terrible fear that the Dharma is not coming into me. That it's sort of sliding, sliding away. I don't feel it permeate me. And I feel sometimes aggressive against it. Aggressive myself for being so or so unenlightened that my karma is so bad, I can't get it, my past evil karma. Bad stories?

[42:28]

Bad story. And then there's like some ungentleness towards this story? Yes. And do you have some intention with regard to this story and some ungentleness with the story? Do you have some intention besides more untenderness? I was going to say, and then something closed up, that I would like to have much compassion and lovingness towards this story and all of my stories.

[43:29]

You would like that? I would like that. Yeah. I would too. So are you... Are you ready to commit to be compassionate to your story, to your karma? For example, your story that the Dharma isn't fully settling into you? Are you ready to commit to be compassionate with that story or those kinds of stories? I'm not sure if I can commit now. Okay. Well, let me know when you can, or let us know when you can. We'd love to hear your commitment to take tender care, compassionate care of your story, whatever. This one's good enough. Of a story that it doesn't permeate me. Yeah, I heard that story, so now that would be a good story. That's a very good story to take care of. That will facilitate the acting out which will allow it to permeate.

[44:35]

That's the principle which I propose to you. And I would like... I would like gentleness to come into me, love for reality, for truth. I hear that. But I want it to be true. I don't want to just say anything. That's fine. That's good. But it's necessary, probably, that you also, not necessarily want, but that you be kind to the stories that are not reality.

[45:44]

If you're not gentle with those stories, some of those painful stories, if you're not gentle with them, if you're close to them, then that will hinder you allowing the truth to come into you. So the story of the truth not coming into you, if you care for that story, that will help the truth come into you and settle in you. So truth is coming through you all the time, but if you push away bad stories, that gesture makes you unable to realize that the truth's coming to you. So you have to be kind to these stories which are not so, which are not true. And what if I enact stay away. If you enact it, okay, as a way of being gentle with it. Right. Rather than like, you know, like, really like trying to get rid of it.

[46:51]

Right. But not, say, stay away, but not just make it stay away, but stay away as a gift. As a gift, as a kindness to it. As a kind of like, yeah. So it can be transformed. So you can what? So this act can be an act of transformation. It can be a way to open to it, to open to the story which you're closed to. So if you act out your closeness, you can open. And if you're open to this and other difficult stories, you'll also open to what you'd like to open to, and you'll let it sink into you. Can I enact, if possible, I'm not sure, the act of rejecting? Yeah, go ahead, do it.

[47:52]

Enact the rejecting of some story or some situation. Of dharma. Yeah, go ahead, act it. We're helping you now, okay? Go ahead. We're helping you. You don't have to do it by yourself. Dharma, stay away. I don't want you. Get away from my life. Let me be what I am. Please continue. Is there anything you want to tell us or me?

[48:57]

I think I might have seen that breeze or wind that you mentioned at the beginning. You might have seen the unique breeze? Uh-huh. Would you like to show it to us, please? Sure. Could you sit down? Could I sit down? Uh-huh. And look about there. It's too close. It's too close? Yeah. So you're right. Anybody else want to come up and express their story?

[50:11]

Please, please. Ladies first. I feel, what's the word? When you don't know the line. Not blocked, but like... Blanking. [...] You're blanking? Yeah. Okay, good. What else? Would you fully express blanking, please? No. Pretty good. Um... Uh...

[51:25]

Okay. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Is there anything you want to say, Susan? I mean, Linda. Linda. Yeah. Hi, Linda. Hi. It's good to see you. It's good to see you. Yeah. Did you fully express yourself just then? I did. Well, no, I held back. I wanted to tell you that your eyes are shiny. That's not good. Sorry. No apology. Okay. And you want to say something? You want to express something to Eileen? Yeah. But sometimes like when I'm out, you know, like on the street or walking down the street, I'll see someone that looks like you.

[52:41]

And how do you feel when you see that? Happy. Yeah. So, but thank you. Yeah. Did you fully express yourself to Eileen? Is that full? Yeah. Okay. You want to say anything to Simon? You know Simon? Do you know him? Yeah, I do. You want to say anything to him? Yeah. What? Do you or don't you? I do, I do. Yeah, I really do. What is it? Well, I just... I just want to say thank, well, yeah, I guess you could say, yeah, I could say thank you. For what? For, well, anyway, like, well, we were like at Nobode. Yeah. And he got in the car and I was in the back seat and I was kind of like spaced out.

[53:45]

And he turned around and he kind of, it was like, it was kind of like this, you know. You could be me, like spaced out. Okay. And I thought, I felt kind of like, you know, I was like, check. I felt, well, it was like being called back. Were you there for that? I was. Okay, good. So you want to say thank you to him for that? Yeah, thanks. Do you have any request of him? Keep doing it. Yeah, I mean, you know, that's real good. What do you say, Simon? Simon, what do you say? I will. Okay. Thank you. And how about Barrett? Do you know Barrett? Yeah, I know Barrett. Do you have something you want to say to him? Do you have something?

[54:52]

Yeah, I do. I do. You don't have to, okay? I do. I do. Okay, say it. I kind of like would like to apologize because I feel like I have... Did you say ditto? What did you say, Barrett? I said you do. I was surprised. Okay. Would you come over here, Barrett, please? Would you come closer, please, Barrett? You want to say you're sorry to Berndt for anything in particular? I was going to say being disrespectful to you sometimes, but at the same time it would be apologizing for being disrespectful to me, which is when we're disrespectful to other people, we're being disrespectful to ourselves. Do you want to say that to Berndt? Yeah. Go ahead, say it. I'm sorry for being disrespectful to myself.

[55:52]

Thank you for that expression. Okay. Okay, anything that you want to say at this time? That was good. Thanks. Yeah. You're welcome. Okay, thanks. You're welcome. Come up again sometime. Okay. Susan, I mean Linda. I think I was possessed or something. I don't know what brought me up here. But now that I've had to wait all this time, it's gotten a little bit, you know, a little more scary. Okay. You're feeling scared of something? I am. What is it? I don't know, just a little nervousness, anxiety. A little nervousness. Up here. Mm-hmm. Okay. And now that you've told us about the nervousness and anxiety, is there anything you'd like to tell any of us or express to us? Yeah.

[56:56]

I really want to drop the story of a separate self. Okay. Would you please act out the story of a separate self? Okay. No, do I have to? No, I'm not a wacky Zen student. This is a real problem. Oh, wow. How was that? It was okay. It was okay? Do you feel like you expressed it? I do. Great. Thank you. You're welcome. Silvia, is there anything you'd like to express?

[58:05]

Yes, very good. Thank you. Very nice. Was that full? Almost. Let's bring it all the way now. Okay. I am very judgmental. Oh, I didn't know. You never told me before. Wow. Amazing. Do I look like it? Huh? Do I look like it? You don't actually. I am. Okay. I don't want to apologize for it. That's fine. It's beautiful that you expressed it. That's the main thing. Apologies are okay too, but getting it out there is what really counts. But it's a bit uncomfortable at times. Yeah. And when you say judgmental, you don't mean just like positive judgments.

[59:12]

Right? Is that what you mean? Not just positive? Sometimes they're positive or negative. They're just judgments. Yeah. But they're annoying. They're annoying. Not all the time. They're annoying. And how do you want to take care of these judgments? How do you want to take care of? How do you want to practice with these judgments? Well, usually what I'd like to do, and sometimes I do it... Excuse me. Could you please stand up? Do you need any help right now? Yeah.

[60:18]

What kind of help do you need? I'd like to stand like this. Okay. You're going to now tell me a little bit more about how you take care of these judgments? Yeah. I try to soften inside. Good. When I soften inside, something in my mind softens as well. Mm-hmm. Good. And contact helps. Yeah, good. Yeah. You're welcome to make contact and then soften inside with these judgments. Okay? That's fine with me. Thank you. You're welcome. Yeah, what does that mean? What are you trying to do? What were you trying to do just there?

[61:18]

Slap you. Oh, slap me. Go ahead, slap me. She wasn't really trying. She was doing slow on purpose. Yeah, there you go. And you were pointing to someone? You were pointing to Rachel? Yeah. Rachel? Yes? Rachel? How do I know that I can trust you? How do you know you can trust me? As a teacher. I don't know. I wouldn't advise it. Then why am I here? Where are you driving at, Rachel? Why am I here with someone I can't trust? I didn't say you couldn't trust. I just said I wouldn't recommend it. That means you're not trustworthy, though. Is that what it means? That's what it means to me.

[62:20]

Okay. I think there's a lot of merit to the proposition that I'm not trustworthy. Mm-hmm. So, since I'm not trustworthy, please take care of me. I'll think about it. Okay, and now that you've thought about it? Give me more time. How much more time do you want? Well, maybe when the practice period's over, we'll see. When the product spreads over what? We'll see. We'll see what? Whether I trust you or not. No, I'm not asking you to trust me. I'm asking you to take care of me. Here's an untrustworthy event here. I'm asking you to take care of this untrustworthy being. I'm asking you to be compassionate towards me.

[63:23]

Hmm. I'm inviting you, I'm begging you to be compassionate to me, even though I'm not trustworthy. And I'm perfectly comfortable with you considering this, but I don't want you to wait till the end of the practice period to answer. Now, if at the end of the practice period you trust me, that's okay with me, but I'm still not trustworthy. All right, I won't trust you then. But please, Be compassionate with me. Be devoted to me. What does that mean? Like, give your life to my welfare. Because I'm not trustworthy. I need help from you. Please help untrustworthy beings. I'm one of them. Please help me. How? How?

[64:30]

Be upright with me. Be generous with me. Be patient with me. Be gentle with me. Be honest with me. Be open to me. And that helps you? It helps me. [...] And it helps you. And it helps everybody. Why? What are you driving at? Why does it help you? It opens the door to the truth. For you? For both of us. You can verify that right now by practicing that way with a being who is not worthy of trust. Oh, I can't.

[65:36]

Hmm? I can't. Well, I did say you could, but I didn't mean that you could do it on your own. We can help you. You don't have to do it by yourself. We will help you. Do you want us to help you? You can try. Do you want us to help you? Do you welcome us to help you? No. Okay. That's called being honest. Okay? You don't welcome us to help you, us unreliable beings. You don't welcome us to help you. That's honesty. Thank you. Okay. Okay or you're welcome? What? I thanked you, didn't I thank you? No. I thought I thanked you, didn't I? I did say thank you, didn't I? Did you hear me say thank you? No, I guess not.

[66:38]

Thank you. Oh, you're welcome. Or, you know, I actually am thanking you, and I do thank you for your honesty. I do thank you for your honesty, and I thanked you before. Do you remember I thanked you before? Yes. And I vow to continue to thank you for your honesty. That's part of the way of being compassionate to an unworthy person, a person unworthy of trust, is to be honest with me, is to be generous with me. Thank you. Catherine, is there anything you'd like to say at this time? I have a story, but I didn't have any stories tonight, but I just got one. Oh, you mean you had a story earlier and then you got another one now?

[67:43]

Yeah, now I've got a story that isn't part of the story of not having any story. Oh, you have a new story. I do. Yeah, okay. I have a story that when you tell people, like in the instance where you just were talking to Rachel, that you're not trustworthy, you know? Yeah. Some of us know that. in the context that, you know, we still kind of trust you. But if people don't have that context, it might really scare them and confuse them. So that's the story that I had. Okay, thank you. I couldn't see Rachel's face, so I don't know if she was scared and confused, but that was my story. Okay, thank you for that. You're not going to give me any hard time or anything. Not too many times. Well, you are kind of injured, Catherine. Like, for example, I could throw myself on your lap, but...

[68:45]

And I could throw myself on Vajra's if you change his posture. There we go. Did you transfer those files? Yes. Thank you. Vajra. Great to see you. So I'm trying to understand how to sort of participate and communicate. Good. That's fine. And it's good to participate even before you understand how. Like you just did now. You came up here and you participated even before you knew how. Now, what else do you want to tell me? Do you have any advice? I just gave you some. Come into the participation before you know how. Don't wait. Don't wait to know how before you start participating.

[69:53]

You are participating. Whether you know how... Everybody's participating. Please join the participation before you know how. Okay? Please open to it before you know how. And you will learn how by... On the spot. Yeah, on the spot by doing it. Okay. There was something else, but this is a good start. Thank you. Oh, I know what it was. It was that... I'm not worthy of trust, but that doesn't mean I don't... That doesn't mean I think it's... What do you call it? I think it's probably good for you to trust me, even though I'm not worthy of it. To take the risk of trusting me. But what I really think you should take a risk on doing, take a risk of trusting, is trust being kind to me. Trust being honest with me. Trust being gentle with me. Trust being open with me. Trust those things. Trust the Dharma. And you can also trust me, but I don't recommend it.

[70:55]

But I don't forbid it either. And I'm not worthy of it. Because you don't trust. Well, basically... do the thing. You know, like trust being honest. Be honest. Trust expressing yourself. Express yourself. Trust being gentle. Be gentle. Trust being kind. Be kind. And that's also trusting the instructions to practice that way. Trust these teachings. And then you realize, and I'm not trustworthy, but you realize I am worthy of your complete love. And you realize that about everybody that you practice that way with. You realize. So again, I often use my grandson as an example. He is unstable, unreliable, not worthy of trust, but he is totally worthy of devotion, total devotion. And if you give him total devotion, you know, the Dharma will be revealed.

[71:56]

And one of the Dharmas that will be revealed is the Dharma of getting your heart broken, because he's not trustworthy. So I don't want to discourage you from trusting. Matter of fact, I really would encourage you to trust the practice. to trust the practice of all beings. Trust that practice. And trust the practice of getting yourself ready to trust the practice of all beings. To trust it, to open to it, and plunge into it. I would really encourage that. Yes? Something you want to tell the people? It changes? Yeah. Well, go ahead. Tell them something. I love you. Oh, that was nice. Do you want to say it a little louder, please? I love you.

[72:58]

I love you, too. What? He goes back and forth, did you say? Okay. Do something that can't come back. Go ahead. Do something that they can't come back with. Mm-hmm. I'm thinking too much. Yeah, you're thinking too much. That's right. Well, in my heart, I appreciate what you have offered tonight. Max. Yes. How's your health? Good, sir. Thank you. Max.

[74:01]

Sir. I don't know why. It's just, it's this way tonight. Yeah, yeah. I don't ever remember you calling me sir before. Have you? No. No. It's a new, it's a new thing. I actually love it. How do you feel about it? Weird. Please come, Max. What's going on here? What's going on here? You're being blessed. Oh, thank you. Do you feel the blessing? Do you feel the blessing? Do you feel it? I feel it. I feel it. Is there anything you'd like to say to your friends?

[75:04]

No, I'm stuck. Okay. You did. You told them you're stuck. Yeah, okay. Was that true? Yes. Okay, tell them again. I'm stuck. Come on, tell them again. Stuck. Stuck. Holy, say it wholeheartedly. Stuck. I don't know. Maybe what? I don't know. I don't know what's going on. I don't know. I don't know. Somebody help me. Somebody help me. Come on. Any particular way you'd like us to help you? Uh, yes. Somebody besides me, you mean, to help you? Uh, no. You can help me. Okay. Well, how would you like me to help you? Um, uh, awaken me. Fast. No. No. Say it again, Mac. Don't make fun of me. Don't make fun of you. No. No making fun? No. [...] I can wake you up, but I can't make fun of you.

[76:06]

Right. Right? It's the hard way with you. It's embarrassing. Yeah, let me make fun of you. Come on, let me make fun of you. Okay, go ahead. Okay, can I make fun of you? No. No. Okay. This is very good. You asked for help. Any other help you want besides me helping you to wake you up? How can you help me, then? How can I help you? Tell her how you can help her. What kind of help do you need? I can do whatever. Whatever. What do you need? Good in reason. Okay, you stay here. Max, what do you want? I want to wake up. You want what? To wake up. What? Wake up! It's getting closer.

[77:07]

What does that say, Max? What did it say? Something in Chinese. I don't know. It says, Zen Mountain Monastery. So yeah, so this is the class. This is the class of enacting reality. We're trying to act it out. Okay? So you're welcome to come again next week if you want to. Or not.

[78:10]

Is Catherine going to give refunds? Give what? That would mean parents. But if you haven't registered for class, please put your name and contact information on the sheet at the back. And next week, more of you can come and express yourself and, you know, enact reality in a traditional Zen fashion. And I really appreciate your support of the people who did express themselves. And I thank the people who did express themselves. And I'm really touched by your willingness and your great, generous hearts. Thank you. May our intention equally extend eternity and bliss.

[79:16]

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