Now I propose to you all, you all, that all Buddhas and ancestors who have been transmitting the wondrous Dharma have made it the true path of enlightenment. sit upright, and made it the true path of enlightenment to enact, to perform the Buddha way, to sit upright as an enactment of the Buddha way.

[01:07]

Buddhas enact the Buddha way. Buddhas perform the Buddha way. And they offer that example so that we may perform the Buddha way as the true path. Now, I understand that bodhisattvas approach the Buddhas, go to meet the Buddhas, and they They express themselves to the Buddhas face to face. They ask the Buddhas questions. But they don't ask Buddhas questions to get something, like an answer.

[02:17]

They ask questions to perform the Buddha way. So I have seen them approach their teacher approach the Buddha and ask questions and thereby beautifully perform and enact the Buddha way by asking a question to their teacher and listening to the response. But they aren't doing a practice to get something. They're doing a practice to realize something at the very moment of the practice. They ask a question. At the moment of asking the question, they understand this question asking is performing the Buddha way, is performing the Buddha work, is realizing the Buddha way. They get a response often, always. The same, the response is performing the Buddha way.

[03:23]

They can ask each other questions, the bodhisattvas can ask each other questions. They can ask the Buddhist questions, but they're performing it for realization of it. Also, they're performing it for realization of it in the sense of showing others how to perform it. And showing others how to perform it is showing others how to realize it. And showing others how to realize it is realizing it. We don't just do it to realize it. do it to help all beings realize it. And all beings are coming forward, supporting us to perform the Buddha way. We don't.

[04:29]

perform the Buddha way by our own power. We give our power to the Buddha way because all beings support us to give ourselves. And it isn't just the person who is playing the role of the teacher who performs the Buddha way. All beings together are performing in a good way. So you are being invited to perform the Buddha way, invited to bring forth your expression, your performance of the Buddha way.

[06:15]

I wonder what it will be. Thank you.

[07:26]

Well, not that point, Mr. Gatlinburg. Not that point. Ah. I don't know how close to you I'll speak. I want all my friends to come up here and be very close to you. You want all your friends to come up here and be close to you? I do too. Quickly. Thank you. You're welcome. A woman came to talk to me in Sweden.

[09:38]

Did I tell you about him? No? I didn't tell you? Did I tell you? She came to see me and she said, I have no friends. And then she said, your friends, like, If I invite them to go to the opera with me, they'll go. But I have no close thing. And I didn't ask her if she wanted feedback. I just gave her feedback. Wanted it. And I said, I don't agree with you. You do have a close friend. I was keeping with me at the time. I was your close friend at that moment. Even though I'd never met this one. And then I took one more step and I said, everyone is your close friend.

[10:48]

But it's hard to realize that. I kept her. Not everyone's your best friend. Everyone's your close friend. When she said that she didn't have any friends and that she divided because I had no close friends, it was an expression of misery. She was miserable about that way of seeing the world. This is a miserable way to see the world, which many people see it that way. This is a terrible world that many people think that they don't have close friends. But it's not true. The truth is, everyone has their close friends.

[11:55]

And then again, it's a question of performance. If we perform it, we realize it. If we don't perform it, even if we think that, it's not realized. But again, I said even if we think it, when we think it, so when we think that everyone's your close friend, that is a mental performance of close friendship. We also need to perform it with our speech and with our body. Just now, we did a performance of that during tea. During tea day, we performed close friendship with our minds. We thought during tea, we thought another thought.

[12:58]

All these close friends, and then We, with our voice, we were quiet as an expression of close friendship. And we also had our bodies close together as an expression of close friendship. So realize close friendship during the tea. Did you notice? That's because you weren't performing. You didn't notice that everyone was your close friend, but because you didn't make your thinking, oh, these are my close friends, and you didn't speak quietly, excitedly, your silence was not a performance. A silence can be a performance of close friendship. And then the silence, in the silence you realize everyone is your close friend, and their body too. So I agree with you, it's good for us to come forth and be close, to perform that we are close friends with everybody.

[14:16]

Some people, of course, are far away. We can't even see them. We can perform the way of our collections even when we can't see them. We can think of them and we can say, this body is offered to you who I can't even see. Now when they come to visit, you can see if you continue to perform When you can see it and when you get closer. And by the way, I think sometimes you can express closeness by closing up. Thank you. Please don't come any closer. This is already close. Thank you so much. A loving giggle.

[15:47]

A loving giggle. A loving Kathy giggle. Why? Why? Since you're responding to your son. You can't do it very close. That's because you feel close. Everything's because you're very close. I was thinking, though, about your use of the word performance. and how apropos that is for and talking to you in this way. So then I was thinking about the fact that these people remember my close friends, and I'm wondering why I have this sensation of my heart racing when I come up to talk to you in this way. But I wanted to tell you a story about my experience of closeness during the tea break.

[16:52]

So I'm thinking maybe for me, more than three or four people have to feel, well, I'll tell you my experience. I walked into the room where the tables were, and everyone seemed to be sitting very formally. And so I myself recoiled from that formality. Went into the library where coincidentally Glenn was sitting and Dave was sitting and Tim was sitting and Jill was sitting. And Jill made her book, her Leg was crossed and her foot sort of greeted my foot. And if we sat next to each other. Toe to toe? Well, sort of like arch to arch. Arch to arch?

[17:55]

Yeah. And I felt that was a very warm gesture. We weren't doing anything. I just felt that sort of warmth coming over. And did you feel that not doing anything was also warm? Yes, I did. And then I was filled with a sense of warmth with my friends there, who I've been friends with for many years. My, you know, song of brothers. Song of cowboys. Yeah. And we were quiet. Or rat boys. I wanted to tell you we were quiet. Thank you for telling me. I was getting worried. I thought maybe you guys got into it. Yeah. Well, in the past, we've been pretty guilty of that. But she's matured. I think we have, yeah. When I first came to talk to the Zen community, I thought, well, these people are really nice.

[19:01]

It's impossible for them to be quiet. It means you didn't. They just want to talk to each other and chat away. And now we've grown up and we realize that we don't have to be talking to be involved. That's right. You can walk and express the closeness. And there it was right today here in the life of it. All these old friends intimately communing. It was wonderful. Yeah. Very close. Very intimate. Well, from your perspective, yes. And also, in reality, even beyond your perspective, it is like that. That's our nature. And it seems that way to you now.

[20:01]

So you're working sooner, lining up with the way they are. More and more. Tall boys and tall girls being together. Very fun. I thought of another experience of closeness that Louise was talking about.

[21:07]

I've noticed that there are a group of us who, when the composition changes a little bit, find ourselves in a group who comes and meditates in the morning. And I saw one day that the person who usually sits on my lap came and sat and I felt so good that he came and sat. And if someone's not there, I'd be the one who's not there. And so I really close to that with my people. without ever saying anything. I also want to say that, you know, I came to live from a tradition where the fulfillment of the spiritual life was an open heart.

[22:16]

And it's a great moment. Ah, did you hear it? Yeah. It's called The Condemn of Experiential Pathway to Northern Hunters. I came from, in the Zen, from a tradition of the young. So, in Zen, I'm kind of looking for a, and of course it's there, but, um, Ordinarily not very expensive. But yourself, as you come here, you know, productively, I know that this is what you're talking about. So gratitude, reverence, worship, closeness, infinity. And this was the whole work.

[23:17]

And as you talk, as you express it, I can feel that in my heart. I mean, I feel really powerful vibrations in my system. And I mean, that's what I did openly. And I would, if I might say, for me it's not just an open heart, but it's an open heart together to realize that together. So people who do not yet realize the open heart will be drawn into the open heart. Well, I think one open heart encourages another open heart.

[24:36]

And that's how you get a whole community of open hearts. You mentioned the need to be compassionate towards people who make you angry.

[26:01]

At least, that's how I interpreted what you said this morning. Well, yeah. I mean, the compassion to everybody, that would include those people. I see this in the way that I think people who don't make you angry. But I feel like what does the most damage to my practice is my lack of compassion for those who make me angry. I think I understand that. And there seems to be a lot of collateral damage as soon as she made it to town. So I'm here to vow or to make a commitment to demonstrate compassion toward people who might need it.

[27:19]

Could I explore the possibility of influence extending in detail to that path? I feel like I'm in terms of being compassionate to the people that are in my world. It's just that I continue to have setbacks. in terms of how I deal with people that make me angry. So I wanted to go into some detail about that point, about the people, you say the people who make you angry. I want to look at that and let me say it another way, in an additional way. The people who The people who I'm uncomfortable with. The people who I find irritating.

[28:29]

The people who I find difficult. The people who I feel hurt by. The people I feel pain from. The people I feel who just don't respect me. And the pain I can when I feel pain if someone doesn't respect me. Or they don't respect somebody else. Those situations. Even before I get angry, it's hard to be compassionate. And then if I'm compassionate about pain, then I might become angry. Make sense? It makes complete sense. In fact, in hindsight, a better word might have been disrespect. Because I feel threatened as a result of that. I want to be compassionate towards people who I feel I disrespect, like me or others, because I experience disrespect and judgment.

[29:42]

So I want to be compassionate towards those who I feel disrespect from, and also with whom I feel threatened. I want to learn to be compassionate in those situations. Right? Yes. Wonderful. And as you know, when we make vows, we slip up and we confess and repent them. We reveal and disclose our lack of compassion towards, for example, from whom we experience disrespect. And by revealing that, you'll not weigh the roots of that lack of compassion. And even if you do not get better at being compassionate towards others or disrespectful of you, if you start practicing noticing that you're not and confess and repent it, although you may not seem to get better at being compassionate, you actually are getting better

[30:56]

thinking by noticing when you slip. Because notice when you slip, compassion is compassion. Some people slip in compassion, but they don't notice it. So they just slip. But if you notice when you slip, there's compassion like this. And then if you notice how you feel when you slip, there's repentance in that compassion too. And that compassion and applied to a lack of compassion will not wear the root of a lack of compassion. So this would be a wonderful thing for us to learn to those who don't respect us. Wouldn't that be wonderful? Yes. because it is difficult to be compassionate to those who seem to be showing disrespect.

[31:57]

Even those who would say, actually, who would admit, yes, I can, I do disrespect you, and I'm trying to show you that. You got it, but you're not, you're not just fantasizing. I agree, I'm trying to be disrespectful. And can't have been successful. And I want to thank you for disrespecting me so I can learn to be compassionate with you. Thank you so much. And I really mean that. That should be interesting. That's the one you really feel that way. Well, I'll report back next time. Just to have this conversation. Yeah, I invite you to report back on this vow to hear about the life of this vow.

[33:02]

Well, actually, now that you've brought it up, this is the confessional, because I've made this vow to you before. Yes. Yeah. And even though you've made it before, I've slipped up risk. Is that right? Certainly more. So when we make our bodhisattva vows, we sometimes slip, but we often, even though we slip, we don't change our mind. I didn't do it, but I still want to do it. I wasn't kind, but I don't change my mind. I just couldn't do it. But I still think it's the best thing to do. It would be very challenging for . Another vow is, I want to learn to see disrespectful people as gifts. In order to become Buddha, you need disrespectful people.

[34:07]

And there are such people. So you can become Buddha. Our Shakyamuni Buddha met a lot of people who disrespected him and who disrespected other people. And he became Buddha by learning how to see the disrespectful people as him. So I want, I vow, I want to the people who are disrespectful to me, I want to learn to see them as gifts, and I commit and vow to learn to see them. What did I say? I vow to let people know who are disrespectful to me that they are presenting me with a gift.

[35:15]

You can do that too. Yes. I have a suggestion. Yes. Don't let them know that until you feel that. If you actually feel that this is a gift, well, I think it would be good to tell them and thank them. If you just think it, or just saying it, but not really think it, It might not be good, because it's a little bit ahead of schedule. And then they might say, oh, yeah, or another one. But if you really need to say, I don't exactly want another one, but if one comes, I want to see it over again. And so he said, OK, there it is.

[36:17]

I said, OK. Thank you. And they can tell. They can tell. At home level, they'll get it. So I hope my help continues to be good, so I can keep hearing updates on this practice from you. This might go around with retreats for years. Yes, it might do. When Joe gets up to confess. Fine with me. Fine with me. Totally walk. Really appreciate it.

[37:18]

Thank you. Now what time is it supposed to be? 5.30? 5.45, okay. And how long? I wanted to discuss the pattern of thinking that I don't think is very helpful. I think it would be helpful if you spoke louder. The pattern of thinking that I don't think is very helpful, but shall deviate in the first confession.

[38:29]

Yeah. In the past year, two years, I have felt it extend out to my experiences with others around wherever I go. Are you saying that you felt warmth from the community towards you? I probably should have it. Yeah. And that you felt that that one person else resonated with you according to your other relationships. Yeah. I guess there's the old thought that if I relate with everyone, how can I relate with anyone?

[39:32]

relating with someone or having a relationship with someone with a certain amount of attention and dedication and support. And maybe that... But if I look at that pattern of thought, feel kind of greedy or self-absorbed for what you dream. The pattern of thought saying that the relation that, you know, I should prefer some people over other people and No, I have friends.

[40:39]

I prefer some friends over other friends. I want a more personal relationship with them. So that thing is greedy. You should prefer some friends over other friends. Is that greedy? Yeah. I agree. That's greedy. If I prefer some people over other people, that's greedy. Or what could be the greedy or a million something? So if I see that, that's a gift to me to show me, oh, there's preference in my mind. It's a gift to me to see that. And those preferences are things, are now opportunities for me to be generous towards them. They were given to me. And also I was given the awareness of a gift. This is a Dharma gift. And now I can practice being generous towards preference.

[41:45]

And if you're generous towards your preferences, you'll give them away. Not try to get rid of them, but you'll give them away. And you'll become free. Even if you still have preferences, you'll learn to give them away as soon as they come. I got the first new order again. Yeah, but I just gave it away. And now it's just you and him and me. In that flow of my giving away my presence. Can you give it away? Huh? Can you give it away? Well, I did it. My body's teaching mine. I think it's a gift. I think it's a gift to me. And now I think it's a gift from... I was given a parking, but I don't hold on to it. And if I give it away, I actually get that given it away. I'm not to the province anymore. You work on me?

[42:57]

Yeah, great. I remember one time said, now Zen Center is getting so people have to make opponents, a team. In the early days of Zen Center, there were operating students. But before open, there weren't going to be members of Zen Center. And if you went to at the university, there weren't going to be people. But then after and actually the other cultural conditions that gave rise to this big increase in interest in Buddhism and Zen, then Zen suddenly got bigger and a lot more students. So he needed to make an appointment to see him.

[43:58]

And he said something like this, so when I see one student, If you're waiting to see me while I'm sitting on person, you should understand that I'm seeing that person not just for that person. If I'm waiting to see him and seeing someone else, it isn't like, well, one day you're going to see that guy and see me. He's seeing that person as a way to help me. And if you're helping somebody and you're not, help, you might think, help this person really quickly so I can help the next person. Which is OK. But if you start not really giving your full attention to this person because you're thinking of the next person, and you're not taking care of this person, and also you're not taking care of the next person, then you do the same thing.

[45:04]

So to give your wholehearted best to this person helps everybody else. It literally helps that when you see them, you'll help them wholeheartedly. You won't be thinking, you know, who's talking to this person. But a lot of us get into helping this person half-heartedly because we have as much person that we have to see half-heartedly. But then we don't help anybody because we teach everybody half-heartedness. So actually, so then we think, if I'm going to try to help everybody, then I really can't really concentrate on this person and give myself entirely to this person. But I would say, actually, when you help one person completely, you help everybody. And if you do one thing completely, you accomplish 10,000 things completely. You do one thing partially, and you do many other things partially.

[46:12]

So we understand we're trying to help, but that means we don't hold back with this person. And this person's not holding back with you. They really aren't. But if you think they are, you have to learn. And if you think you are holding back with something, you have to learn that you're not. In other words, you have to learn to be compassionate. And then when you realize that you're completely giving yourself to this person and this person is completely giving herself to you, then you stop helping them. That relationship between these two people saves all things you do. And a half-hearted relationship doesn't help other people. A half-hearted relationship with one friend doesn't help the other person.

[47:21]

Another bad example. Here's an example of a lie. A lie of half-heartedness. A lie of partial connection. A lie of kind of friend rather than the truth. dedication, 100% generosity, and closeness. That truth helps everybody when you live it, and again, live it. But to learn this 100%, so again, be gracious with yourself if you've seen 50% or 99% Under 10% is kind of the same as 90%. Overdoing it, underdoing it. Occasionally, complete, complete presence.

[48:27]

This means completely getting this out and completely receiving this out. So this is what's happening right here. And the awareness of giving yourself is receiving yourself. This person comes and gives me myself. I give myself to this person. This is the awareness that the Buddhists practice. And sometimes Buddha talked to one person. Sometimes Buddha talked to a innumerable person. Deceiving completely, giving completely. That's the context. That's the context of the path in so-called missed school. Any other questions?

[49:41]

Thank you. Many years ago, some of the people I worked with were very difficult for me to work with. And I confess that I did not respect them very much.

[50:55]

It was a. It was. Inside him. And. At a certain point they moved away or went somewhere else. And I was pretty happy about that. And then contact and more contact. Things changed again. Everyone had an opportunity to come back together in a new and different way. And so when that opportunity, the new opportunity, presented itself, I had this really strong negative reaction. To the people who you had previously had trouble respecting coming back into your life?

[52:06]

It seemed like that, yeah. And so, in the meantime, in all these years, I took the exam and practiced. And... You think I'm practicing... I don't think that happened. In fact, yeah, I don't believe it. And I still have this. Blood rising in a film. What do we mean? And so. I guess fortunately there was some advance warning of this today. And I was able to. And I got warmed up. I warmed up. Expecting things. I got your expect mojo going.

[53:10]

That's right. And I became clear, very clear, that the feeling that I had This aversion for this horrible kind of lack of respect fixed me. And it kind of, I realized that I was not the same person. And I suspected strongly that they were not the same people I knew. Yeah. Without having seen them again yet. So you suspected that maybe they changed? I suspected that things had changed. Since you heard that Dr. G looked at the change. I thought maybe that would apply to this case also.

[54:14]

And so it was kind of like when my sense of this fixed view, when it became clear to me that that was a fixed view that I held of disrespect, then it kind of like died and blew away that view. And so then I was able to open up to the possibility of meeting them again. And I guess it wasn't as much like a welling up of joy as it was just a sort of a dissipation of the blockage. And I had the opportunity, when I finally did have the opportunity, I enjoyed it very much.

[55:22]

It felt like it took a little bit of bravery. It still felt like it took a little bit of bravery to not bring back the emergency. But it was actually quite a pleasant experience. I mean, it opened one experience. And I didn't discuss it explicitly with them, but they seemed to respond in a similar way. And Joe mentioned, I think in this case, I had the benefit of a considerable amount of time. And Some of those things can be much more difficult and it's sort of a quick turnaround situation, but it's the only way to share that.

[56:34]

Congratulations to the practice for having a future. I listened and remembered Thank you. Thank you.

[57:21]

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