I mentioned the assertion that all Buddhas transmit a wondrous, inconceivable dharma, and the The standard of that transmission is a samadhi. Another way to say it is, Buddhas who transmit the true Dharma, there's a samadhi in which they transmit it. And that samadhi is sometimes called the self-fulfilling samadhi or the self-enjoyment samadhi.

[01:13]

If you break up the characters that make up enjoyment or fulfillment, it can be translated as self-receiving and using samadhi. So the Buddhas live in a samadhi. The Buddhas live in a stillness, a self-fulfilling stillness. And in that stillness, they transmit the inconceivable, unsurpassable, wondrous teaching, wondrous truth. And the beings who receive the transmission are also in this same samadhi. So the Buddha and the sentient beings enter this samadhi and transmit this dharma back and forth to each other, kind of like ping pong in samadhi.

[02:27]

And that expression is one. Another similar one, which you chat regularly, is the teaching of suchness, intimate transmission, intimate entrustment, Buddhas and ancestors. The teaching of suchness is intimately communicated by Buddhas and ancestors is the way we've been chanting it. But it's teaching of suchness, intimate communication, intimate entrustment, Buddhas and ancestors. What Buddha ancestors are, I would say Buddha ancestors are intimate entrustment. And intimate entrustment is the teaching of suchness.

[03:42]

The teaching of suchness is intimate entrustment. Intimate trustment is Buddhas and ancestors. The teaching of suchness is Buddhas and ancestors. So it's not the sentence that we make is Buddhas and ancestors intimately communicate the teaching of suchness, but it's really teaching of suchness is Buddhas and ancestors, is intimate communication. There are three things are the same. teaching of suchness is intimate communication, is Buddhas and ancestors. Or you can say it the other way, teaching of suchness is intimately communicated by Buddhas and ancestors. But the Chinese characters kind of, to me, look like teaching of suchness, intimate entrustment, Buddhas and ancestors. But you can make a sentence out of that, too. And the intimate entrustment, if it's intimate, it's both ways that Buddhas are transmitting with sentient beings.

[04:58]

Yeah. Yeah, it's like that. It's like you and me talking right now. Another way it's said, which you're familiar with, is, now all ancestors and all Buddhas who transmit the true Dharma have made it the true path of enlightenment, or the true path of transmission. Because enlightenment isn't just, it's, in relationship, it's an illumination that's transmitted. So now all Buddhas and all ancestors who take care of this Buddha Dharma have made it the true path to sit upright, practicing in the midst of a samadhi. So the true path for those who are transmitting the Dharma is to be in samadhi.

[06:08]

So, and yeah. Is that simple? Yeah. We enter the samadhi and communicate. And that's That's what Buddhas are up to. And when we're in samadhi, communicating intimately, we're joining Buddha's work, the work of Buddhas. And it's inconceivable. And in this samadhi, and it has different names, so we have, remind me, I'll do the different names later. So in this samadhi of the Buddhas, ordinary men are singing and ordinary women are singing in an inconceivable way.

[07:18]

And stone women are dancing and wooden men are singing. And no consciousness reaches No consciousness reaches the dancing that's going on in samadhi. No words reach the intimate communication. The intimate communication is going on and no words reach the communication. But this place where no words reach is not without speech.

[08:31]

It can speak. And the place where no — and there's gestures being communicated also in the samadhi. People are making signs to each other. They're signaling. There's all kinds of gestures being exhibited, I don't know if exhibited, being made in the samadhi. And no gesture that we can make in consciousness can reach those gestures. Like this gesture does not reach the gestures that are going on in samadhi. This is a conceivable gesture. So the next thing, next big step is, although my speech or my singing cannot reach the singing that's going on in samadhi, my singing, my perceptible singing, is not only can realize,

[10:10]

the singing that my singing does not reach. My singing does not reach the singing of the wooden man. It does not. And yours doesn't either. But my singing and your singing can realize the inconceivable singing in samadhi. There is singing. It can be realized. And my singing and your singing can realize it. And here's the amazing part, or the even more amazing part. The only way to realize it is by your singing. There's no other way. So, several amazing things. One is that there is, in stillness, there's singing and dancing going on. That's kind of amazing.

[11:15]

We usually think when there's in silence and stillness there's no singing and dancing. No. There is singing and dancing in stillness and silence. That's amazing to me. The next thing is this singing and dancing is inconceivable. That makes some sense because I can't figure out how there can be singing and dancing in stillness and silence. And no consciousness can reach that singing and dancing. I don't know if that's amazing or just wonderful or hard to understand, but that's what I'm saying. There's no trace of consciousness in this wondrous singing and dancing. And words live in consciousness. No words of consciousness and no consciousness and no even conscious silence can reach this silence and reach this singing. And then it is possible to realize this inconceivable liberating singing and dancing

[12:24]

of the Buddha's playful samadhi, it's possible to realize it by your singing and dancing. And then the final thing again, there's no other way. But there's no limits on the ways that you can realize it. Your songs don't have to be kanji, zaibo, zasu. They don't have to be, now all Buddhas and all ancestors who I transmit the truth, doesn't have to be that song. it can be any song you sing, can be an opportunity to display, express, sing, dance, show, demonstrate in a perceptible realm the imperceptible workings of liberation and peace. It's amazing. And then even if you believe it, then it's hard to remember it.

[13:30]

But by believing it, by believing that you can, your life, your daily actions can realize and must realize, and then remembering that, this is a picture of practice. This is a picture of practice. There's no other way other than what you're doing right now. Right now. Now there's another way. That other way's gone, now this is the way. To find the place where you are Oh, and then the other point I brought up on Sunday is that the commitment and the mindfulness that all your daily actions are the opportunity for the samadhi and to express it, that attitude and remembering that is called grandmother mind.

[15:00]

by Dogen Zenji. The idea of grandmotherly kindness, of course, is all over the world. It's familiar to people. A lot of people know about grandmother and grandfather kindness. This is a special Zen version of grandmother kindness. It's the one that is using all the acts, all the perceptible kindnesses that you do towards grandchildren and all your heartfelt wish to be of assistance to grandchildren. Everything you do there is for the grandchildren and it's also for all sentient beings. You're not just taking care of one grandchild. You're making your care of the grandchild the enactment of this samadhi, which is the transmission of Buddha Dharma.

[16:07]

And of course, grandchildren often have no conscious interest in Dharma transmission. They want video transmission. There's a few, yeah. But really, actually, they all do want it. They just sometimes want it in a, what's it called, an oppositional way. Okay, and so there were some questions, and Brandon's going to remind me something. In the meantime, did the people who already raised their hands, did you want to say something? Yes. Yes. The picture that I get from what you're saying is actually In one side, it's an individual spiritual way that you get by practicing and studying and teaching development.

[17:23]

In another way, it's a spiritual way that you become connected with your teacher that comes in an intimate relationship. The more you practice and the more you are part of it, that's the true way. Are you what? It's... Am I so hard to describe it by words? If it's a spiritual fact, how can you describe it by using words? You can use words. You have to use words. Using words is the only way to realize the spiritual truth.

[18:26]

That's part of the... Using words is the only way to realize what words don't reach. That's spiritual practice. In spiritual practice, words don't reach the source of our practice, yet we must use words. And remember when we use words that these words are not reaching it, but I want to realize what I can't reach by my daily life. And there's no other way to reach what my daily life cannot reach other than my daily life. So if I work in my daily life to be respectful of my teacher and careful with my teacher and gentle with my teacher, then my carefulness and respect, which don't reach the actual relationship with the teacher, realize the actual relationship with the teacher.

[19:27]

And if you're disrespectful to your teacher and other people, then you must use your disrespect If it ever should happen, don't miss that opportunity. Right while you're being disrespectful, if you remember, this is disrespectful, but I want this disrespect to realize the inconceivable respect that the teacher and I are actually living in. Of course, when you do that, that seems very respectful. And that is very respectful. Most people have trouble keeping track of respect when they're feeling disrespectful. But it is possible to have a feeling of disrespect and be very respectful at the same time. It's very possible. There's many stories about it. And a lot of the stories are the teachers being respectful of a student who's being disrespectful.

[20:34]

There's a lot of stories about that. But there's also many stories where the teacher seems to be disrespectful and the student is respectful. And they use those stories like that. Teacher respectful, student not. Student says, I don't respect you. And the teacher sincerely says, thank you very much. Or, you know, I welcome you to my life. the teacher really does respect the student, and the student thinks they don't respect the teacher, and that's the way the story looks in the realm of perception. And they could both use that story to realize the imperceptible, inconceivable respect that's going on in the samadhi, in this Buddha samadhi. Of course, there's also stories where a student teacher respects, student respects,

[21:38]

Okay? But the respect that the teacher's expressing towards the student and the respect that the student's expressing towards the teacher, that respect does not reach the respect that's going on in samadhi. But it realizes it. And if the teacher's being not respectful and the student's not being respectful, that doesn't look like that could possibly be related to what's going on in the samadhi. And in a way, it's understandable. But even if you did think it was related, it still doesn't reach it. Disrespect, perceptible respect, disrespect doesn't reach the samadhi. And perceptible respect or disrespect, neither one of them reach the samadhi. and both of them can realize it. That's what I propose to you.

[22:43]

Any questions? Can I ask a question and then check and understand? Ask a question and check an understanding, OK. With men singing and stone women dancing, is that a bit like stone women giving birth and eastern mountains moving over the water? Are these ways of pointing to a world beyond perception? Yep. It's my question. Stone women giving birth is also not just stone women usually can't move, but stone woman also is a symbol for an infertile woman. So infertile women give birth. And that was one question and one understanding I already checked out.

[23:45]

Anyone want to check out some other understandings? You want to check out more? OK. This is the last one, though. So it seems that this is going on all the time. It's, yeah, it's, like it says, the inconceivable, unthinkable, unceasing, it's unceasing. Our actual relationship, reality doesn't actually take any breaks. There's lots of the distraction. in noticing destruction. We can see even an offer that destruction as the remorse.

[24:46]

Yeah. And also, in noticing the distraction, you can practice bodhisattva practices with the distraction. That's like confession and repentance. That too, yeah. You can confess and repent the distraction. You can be generous with the distraction. And distraction can be your meditation object. Instead of following your breathing or paying attention to your posture, you can meditate on distraction. And... Yeah, when you practice generosity towards distraction you enter samadhi. It might not look like you expect. Samadhi will never look the least bit like you expect because samadhi doesn't look like something. Samadhi doesn't appear like anything. It's not the realm of appearances. It's the realm of intimate life. Consciousness is where there's appearances. And somebody says, well, like some people ask often, how do I know if I'm samadhi?

[25:57]

Well, to know you're in samadhi is not the kind of thing that samadhi is about. But still, it's pretty easy to tell if you're not in samadhi. Like if you're tense and you're restless, you know, your consciousness isn't in samadhi. But if you're feeling calm and relaxed and open and then, you know, people can yell at you and scream at you and you feel calm and relaxed and open and they can tell you to give up your samadhi and you give it up, it's probably, you know, you might be in samadhi. But there's no way to know because samadhi has no appearance. Was there anything else? Let's see. Did I see Dora Lee and Timo? Anybody else that I missed? Peter? Anybody else? And Brandon? OK. Ready? So remember those names, please.

[26:59]

I'm wanting to understand more what you mean by realization. Realization, well, it's realization is freeing all beings so they can dwell in peace. So each intimate moment, no matter what is happening, is fully engaged. Each moment of intimacy, no matter what's happening, is fully engaged. Right. Well, and that full engagement, that intimacy, is liberation. And that liberation is realization, and that liberation is not something that appears in perception.

[28:01]

and it's not something that you recognize. You can recognize it, but that's not — recognizing liberation is not liberation. Like, I don't know what, a mother can be nursing a baby and the milk can be flowing from the breast into the mouth, and that's called successful breastfeeding. The baby's swallowing and it's all going quite nicely. The mother may not recognize it. It's still going on. She may be, I don't know what, talking to an adult and feeling nice about doing something besides breastfeeding. But the breastfeeding is going on. She doesn't know anything about it. I mean, she knows maybe that the nipple's in the baby's mouth, but she might not know that the milk's flowing and that the baby's sucking in the baby.

[29:09]

She might not know that, but it's going on. The realization is there. And then as she recognizes it, oh, but the recognition isn't the nutrition, isn't the feeding. But there can be recognition of realization. Like you say, I think everybody got liberated. And in the end of some sutras it says, 10,000 people attained liberation. And that can be an assertion or it can be a recognition. So you can assert something you don't recognize. And I can assert things I don't recognize. like I can assert, you are all excellent Zen students, but that's not a recognition right now. Sorry. But if I did recognize, oh, I recognize she's a great Zen student and he's a great, if I recognized, that recognition wouldn't be your being a great Zen student.

[30:18]

And sometimes we think, oh, there's liberation. Oh, there's peace. Well, that's okay. What about when we don't see there's freedom and there's peace? Well, then, well, we've got to realize it. And then even if we don't recognize it, we're working on realizing it, not just depending on the appearance and disappearance of peace. But the appearance of peace is very encouraging to a lot of people. It makes them want to continue to work for the realization of peace. Okay? Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Let's see, I don't know. Timo. I think you've answered quite a bit of my question, but I wanted to bring it a bit more. We say everybody is enlightened or everybody is samadhi, and some people realize it and some don't.

[31:34]

And then we say of these realized people, for some people it enters into consciousness, they know they are realized people, like Buddhas can know that they are Buddhas. Other people do not know that they are realized. What is the difference between a person who is realized and doesn't know about it and a person who is not realized? In both, it has not entered consciousness, the realization. But we still say maybe there is a realized person How would suffering end if those realized persons are coming into consciousness, conscious who are not realized? I think the difference is that the realized person uses whatever is going on in consciousness as an expression of the realization.

[32:41]

and the other person who's in the samadhi, the unrealized person is in relationship to the realized person, and the enlightenment is bouncing back and forth between them. And it's bouncing between them and the trees and the trees and the ocean and the ocean and the people. It's all — everybody's doing the Buddha work in the samadhi. Those who realize the samadhi are those who in their deluded mind, their karmic consciousness, they're using this moment for the purposes of realization. And those who do that, they can do that because of realization, and their doing of it is the realization. And those who miss the opportunity of using this moment are not realizing who they are. That's the difference, is using the opportunity or not.

[33:48]

The difference is practice. When there's practice, there's realization. If there's not practice, even if the person is so-called teacher, they just temporarily are not a teacher. They're not the realized one. And the practice might not enter the consciousness. The practice does not Well, it does enter the consciousness. It's realized by the consciousness. But the consciousness doesn't know about the practice. And those who can use their consciousness to realize the inconceivable Buddha mind, those who can use, those who do use, not those who can, everybody can, those who do, who are using their karmic mind to realize the wisdom mind, those who are doing that, that's the practice.

[34:51]

And those who don't do that, there's no practice, which is realization. So the difference is the practice or not the practice, because everybody's involved in the thing that we want to realize. And the more you live like that, the more you live like that. And supposedly there's a proposal from headquarters that some beings evolve to a point where they're consistently using karmic consciousness to realize that which karmic consciousness can never know and never reach. So that could be one of the reasons why they say Buddhas do not necessarily know in karmic consciousness, I would say, that they're Buddhas.

[35:56]

They're functioning as Buddhas, but they don't necessarily think in karmic consciousness, I'm a Buddha. But they do think, I want to use this moment of karmic consciousness for the welfare of all beings. They do do that. And they do. They do whatever, and if they think it's Tuesday, they want to use that to realize the true Dharma. And they do. That's the way they live. But they don't necessarily think in karmic consciousness, I'm a Buddha, unless you show them a sentence, write a sentence out and say, read that. And then they read it. But while they're reading the sentence, they don't miss that opportunity. But sometimes we're reading sentences, and have you ever read a sentence and you're more interested in finishing the sentence than you are in using the reading of the sentence to express the samadhi? So it's a difficult training to make everything we do

[37:02]

every gesture, every word, every thought. This is being used. This is being devoted to the realization of the samadhi, which is the transmission. Who's next? Do you have any more questions? You get two, just like Devin. Two questions. Do you want to who knows about practice, let's say, the unit who knows about it or has perception as karmic consciousness. What is the unit who realizes? The unit who realizes? The unit who realizes is every single action of daily life, every thought, every gesture, and every word of speech.

[38:08]

Those are the realizational units. And they realize the samadhi, which is the practice of all of us. So our individual whatevers, Any moment of action is the unit of realization of a practice which is not my practice, which is not, it's not that gesture right there. I'm using this gesture, these gestures, I'm using them to realize the practice we're all doing, which is inconceivable to me and maybe to you. And I'm using what I'm saying as a unit of display, a display unit. That's the unit of realization. And that unit of realization realizes everything in that moment.

[39:10]

And everything you do does, but if you're not They are for it. If you're out of tune with that, then try again. Who's next? Peter? Is there a difference between grandmother mind and grandfather mind? No. But there is a difference between grandmother mind and mother mind. Just kidding. And sometimes they translate that as parental mind, that mind. Sometimes they translate Roba Shin, old woman or old wife mind, sometimes they translate it as, into English, those characters, they sometimes translate it as parental mind.

[40:15]

And so they give examples of parents will, if the children are cold, they'll give them their clothes or their blankets. If the children are hungry, they'll give the children their food. Whatever they've got, they give to the children. So whatever you've got, you give to the Dharma, you give to the samadhi. That attitude of whatever I've got, and what you've got right now is your karmic consciousness. That's all you've got, really, is your karmic consciousness, your thoughts, your words, and your gestures. That's all you've got. And you say, what about my clothes? Well, your clothes are your karmic consciousness, too. you know, these clothes that are appearing in your mind, those are karmic consciousness. Those are actually your mind. So whatever you've got, the only place you've got something is karmic consciousness. So you give whatever you've got now, and that attitude of giving that is like a mother who would give everything for her child.

[41:24]

You give everything for the peace and freedom of all beings, which is to give it to this samadhi where it's living. And when you give it, It's realized. And that spirit is called grandmother mind in this school, which is just like the way grandmothers do with their grandchildren. But some grandmothers do it, they think, just for their grandchild. But this gift to this grandchild we use as a gift to all beings. And so we're trying to be mindful of that. Remember that. Just a second. Peter looks like he's... Are you done? Are you cool? Yeah, I just had another question.

[42:25]

You want to ask two also? Those other guys got two. Go ahead. Two is the... The wondrous, inconceivable enlightenment of truth. How do we know this? Wisdom knows it. You don't, again, you don't know it with your conscious mind. You have stories about it and you recognize it in your conscious mind. Like you say, oh boy, she's really enlightened. Or she's a little bit enlightened. Or she's quite enlightened. Or she's like below average enlightenment. These are things that appear in consciousness. Right? Perhaps you've seen some of those. Those are like recognitions of enlightenment. So some people have recognized enlightenment in others, living others, books, stories.

[43:31]

They say, oh, that's enlightenment. Good. That can be very encouraging. And sometimes they see it in themselves. Hey, maybe I'm enlightened. That seemed pretty enlightened, what just happened there in my mind. Those are like recognitions of enlightenment. Those aren't enlightenment itself. How do you know enlightenment? Wisdom is knowing enlightenment. When there's wisdom, that's the way you know enlightenment. But that's not an object. That's not an appearance. Yeah, insight's another word for wisdom. It's kind of a synonym. So we can know, Buddhas know things with wisdom, bodhisattvas know things with wisdom, but also they can know things with karmic consciousness. But the way we know things in karmic consciousness is

[44:32]

a very reduced version of whatever it is that we're knowing. The way we know ourselves and others in karmic consciousness is a highly reduced, limited version which can be perceived. In his communication with Tetsugikai, Dogon mentions his lack of grand-motherly mind. Is there also some particular recommendation for enhancing or training this particular aspect of life? Well, could everybody hear what she said? She said there's a story about Tetsu Gikai was not a direct successor of Dogen, but if Dogen had lived a few more years, he would have become Dogen's successor. And the main problem that Dogen had that he wanted Gikai to understand was his grandmother mind, and Gikai did not get it.

[45:44]

And Dogen pointed it out three times. And so, and what he didn't, what Gikkai didn't get is he, and he was, Dogen praised him so much. He was such a great monk. He was so energetic and kind to the other monks. And Dogen really appreciated him. he was one of the great blessings of the Sangha. But he was somewhat lacking in his grandmother mind, which means he thought that there was some enlightenment or some Buddha reality in addition to his daily life. So there he is talking to Dogen and he's totally devoted to his teacher and listening carefully. You know, listening as carefully as any of us could listen to the teacher.

[46:47]

But lurking in his mind was a disbelief that his listening to the teacher was the only way at that moment that the Buddha way could be realized in this universe. At that point. He didn't. And Dogen could see that. And then after Dogen died, Tetsugikai worked with Dogen's successor, Koen Eijo Daisho. And after about a year and a half, somehow things fell into place, and he saw that there is no other Buddha way other than our daily life. And he said, my teacher told us that. I didn't believe him. Can you imagine? I used to feel that way when Suzuki Roshi was alive. Some people didn't believe him. How could they not believe him? But they didn't. He was like around, you know. Now if he was around now, he'd be very popular.

[47:51]

A lot of people say, I want to go see Suzuki Roshi. Some people didn't really believe he was worth their time. And Tetsu Gikai, who was really devoted to Dogen, still didn't believe him. And Dogen could see it. He thought there was something other than the conversation they were having at that moment. Like there he is saying, you're somewhat lacking in grandmother mind. And Tetsugi Kai was kind of like, where's the Buddha way? I did that one time with Suzuki Roshi. I've told you that story. I was flying with him in an airplane to Portland to go to Reed College and shortly after taking off or before taking off when we were in our seat, he said he was going to teach me how to count people in Japanese. And he did. But while he was giving me this instruction and while I was practicing the instruction, I kind of thought there was some other Buddha way than learning to count people in Japanese.

[48:59]

And in a way there is. For example, Tracy's making a mudra in her face with her hand now. And so that's not counting people in Japanese, but that's another way to realize the Buddha way. But still, one might think there's some other way to realize Buddha way than make this gesture. When you're counting people, you might think there's some other Buddha way than one, two, three, four, five. There's no other way than one, two, three, right now. This is the place. This is directly pointing. And there's no other way than this and this and this. And I thought there was. And I noticed that I thought there was, and I thought, and I was thinking, yeah. I didn't quite get to the point of, it seems like I think there's some other teaching that he can give me other than teach me in Japanese.

[50:04]

I was not at the place of there is no other way. I was not there yet. I was just noticing that I thought there was some other teaching he could give me. Why doesn't he teach me about something else? Like, why doesn't he teach me about Bodhidharma on the airplane? No? That's kind of where I was at. And that's where Tetsugikai was. It's like he probably thought, Dogen's telling me I'm lacking in grandmother mind. Well, when's he going to teach me about how to have grandmother mind? You know? So it's right there. And he kind of like, no, there must be some other time that I'm going to get taught right now. And Dogen says, I'm sure you will come to understand this and we will complete our training.

[51:05]

And he did. But Dogen had passed away before. But he did come to see that. And then he turned into kind of a grandmother mind fanatic. Who's next? Did I take care of everything? But you were before him, weren't you? Was she before you? You were several days ago. So Brandon and then Steve. So Brandon, yes. So I think that I live a pretty relatively ethical and upright life. I've been told that the work I'm doing is very lively and active. But I found that in order to carry that work on, it seems I'm forced to

[52:11]

kill thousands of tiny little beings and have my employees kill thousands of tiny little beings to protect our product. And I also live in a very poor place where I'm poor. And deer are very plentiful, so I hunt for food there. And this is the kicker. It can be said that the only way I could afford a plane ticket to get here was to sell cannabis and moonshine. And some of my customers are glad to know that . I remember last year you told us about the presets and how they're not. Can you remember the rest of what you want to say?

[53:22]

That's it. Okay. So the point I wanted, can I address that one point? The main point I want to start with is the precepts are not how they appear. And you talked about one way they appear, as commandments. I would say they're not the other ways they might appear. They're not how they appear. But they do appear. And they appear in consciousness as appearances. And they appear in consciousness basically as word images, like not killing. Not killing is not how it appears in consciousness as those words. That's not what it is. Not killing is in the samadhi. And the words killing and not killing or robbing or no word reaches not killing.

[54:29]

And the samadhi the samadhi which no words reach, the samadhi can talk, and the samadhi says, precept of not killing, precept of not taking what's not given. It talks like that. I mean, excuse me, it talks, and when we hear it in our consciousness, it sounds like those words. Those words are a message from the samadhi that touches our consciousness. And when it touches our consciousness, it turns into those words. And then we can look at those words and treat those words the way we treat other words, like distraction. And if we treat those words with compassion and stillness, we enter the samadhi where the precepts are alive, are living.

[55:34]

And part of what we need to be still with is our body, our breathing, our body temperature, our state of health, our hunger, our tensions, what other people say to us, all that stuff we have to practice with, right? But in this valley, in this temple, where we're trying to practice with whatever's arising in consciousness, there's some causes and conditions which cause the appearance of the words not killing. So just like breathing is appearing in our consciousness, because of where we are, the words not killing are appearing in our consciousness. And not only that, but the words, I vow to practice not killing, I vow to realize the precept of not killing.

[56:43]

This kind of stuff is occurring in our consciousnesses. But the way the word not killing is appearing is not the precept. It's what we can look at to realize what that is. And if you want to realize that, then it probably naturally flows that anything that you think is not in accord with that, that's appearing in your consciousness, it would be good to get that out in the open. Like, I kind of think that there's killing of these little tiny beings. I think that. And I feel some responsibility for that. That's an appearance in your consciousness which you're telling us about. And you're saying, I feel some responsibility for that appearance. And you're telling us about that. And that's part of entering samadhi with those precepts.

[57:47]

so the precepts come from samadhi and then they appear in consciousness and the way they appear is not them but they do appear and then they say please meditate on us but everything that's appearing in consciousness is asking you to be still with it so that you can enter samadhi with it and then you can liberate it and that's so when you see something when you feel some some homage, some wish to align yourself with these precepts that come from this intimate transmission. When you feel you want to make peace with these precepts, part of it is to make peace with the appearance of these precepts. And the appearance, maybe the appearance of the precepts and also the appearance of not being in accord with them. So then you confess not being in accord with them.

[58:49]

By confessing not being in accord with them, then you see how you feel. And if you feel sorrow, you practice stillness with that sorrow. And that might lead you to say, I'm sorry. And that process of remembering or being somehow of the appearance of this precept coming up in your mind, not killing, not killing. By the way, it's not killing. It's not don't kill. Character is not don't kill. Character is not killing. Not killing is the reality of the samadhi. Here's the precept. This is the truth. The truth is not killing. Okay, now we meditate on that. And then we see our actions, and we want our actions to be expressing not killing, and we don't see how it's going on, and we say, okay, I see that. I remember the precept in my mind, and now I also notice something that doesn't look like the precepts, and I'm sorry.

[59:55]

This way of dealing with that is conducive to entering the samadhi and realizing the precept. So that's where these precepts come from. They come from the samadhi. And then when they touch our consciousness, they turn into word images. And then they bounce around with all the other word images in our consciousness, like right livelihood, helping beings, making this work, going to the Green Gulch, all that stuff is going on in there. And we have to deal with it all in a way that is in accord with entering samadhi, which is to be still with it all. And then again, just keep, every time our action seems to be not in accord with the precepts, that we notice that and are kind to that, this is conducive to more and more feeling at peace with this precept.

[60:57]

and also being ready for people to come up to us and say, you know, you probably should not be at peace with this precept because you're doing a bunch of stuff which aren't in accord with it. And when they say that to you, it's just like, you know, you treat that just like when you thought that about yourself. You be still with that too. But in that case, you might not feel sorrow because you might feel like, well, I'm really happy with the way I listened to this person accuse me or indict me for violating this precept. I feel very receptive to them. I feel good about that. So then you don't, then you feel good. I feel like I appear to be receiving that negative feedback. That's great. I'm so happy. It's the first time I ever received negative feedback and like really totally like, okay, thank you. I appreciate your support. So this is a little bit about how these precepts come from the samadhi and then how there's ways of relating to the way they're functioning in our consciousness that brings us back into the samadhi where they come from.

[62:10]

And this constant process, not constant, this process, which may someday be constant, is the process of realizing these precepts. Yes, Grandma? So could you say that you could kill a deer without killing it? As in physically having killed a deer? I guess if you're asking, you could say that, yeah, but I don't know. I don't think I would say that to very many people. Like I said, don't try this at home. One time somebody at Green Gulch came to me and he said there's a deer down in the field who was hit running to the fence and broke his leg. I broke her leg. So there she was with this compound fracture.

[63:16]

And so the wound was open. The bones were sticking out. And there were maggots around it. And so he thought he wanted to kill it, to put it out of its misery. And he wanted me as a priest to be there to witness it. So I said, okay. And I went. I think this is in Being Upright. And I went and witnessed it. And so then he tried to kill the deer to put the deer out of its misery. And I witnessed this. And I felt like he just traumatized the deer. I felt like it was not helpful, this killing. And I thought, well, I'm not going to do this anymore. I think I'm not going to do this anymore, to kill something to put it out of its misery.

[64:18]

But, you know, I'm not judging other people who want to do that. But looking back, I felt like the deer was actually quite calm. Not happy, you know. but calm with its plight. And I understand that maggots, although they're, to some people, rather repulsive. I don't know what they taste like. But some people eat them when they're hungry. But they clean the wound, actually. But anyway, the maggots have their ethical problems with bacteria. But the deer actually I don't think was helped. by that attempt to help the deer, I think it was a mistake. Intending to try to help, but not wise, not coming from deep understanding. And so I think I made a mistake, and I think, I don't know about him, but I think he made a mistake. The deer, I think the deer did its best, but it was pretty hard for the deer to be still with these people trying to help it.

[65:29]

If there's a way to be with a deer that's really compassionate and really still, and the deer dies, then as we enter samadhi with the dying deer, I think maybe there was no killing, even though the deer died. And if I think there's killing, that's where killing exists, is where I think there is. and sometimes I do think it is, and then I'm sorry to be in that neighborhood and I want to practice with that appearance of killing in a way that will promote the realization of the precept of not killing, which is to practice compassion with the with this appearance, and if I feel any responsibility for it, I want to say, I confess I feel responsible for this appearance of killing, and I feel sorrow about it, and I want to realize the precept of not killing.

[66:41]

Because realizing that precept doesn't just keep somebody alive, it realizes the freedom and peace of all of us. The samadhi is saying, these precepts will guide you back to the samadhi. So, also, not killing thoughts. Not killing thoughts. Not wanting to strangle your shortcomings. Not killing another by judging them illegally. Well, you might judge somebody, but you can judge somebody as an act of generosity. You can see your judgment of them as a gift, and you can see them as a gift while you judge them. You can say, what a wonderful gift. Here's this person, this wonderful gift, and now here's a judgment of them, another wonderful gift to me, given to me.

[67:44]

then I'd be still with this gift. It won't be like, oh, this person is how they appear and this judgment is how it appears. It's just a thought. That way of being, we realize the samadhi, and then we realize how the judgment is doing Buddha's work and the person is doing Buddha's work. Yes, maybe we can finish you off now. Yeah? Actually, speaking of finishing off, I remember a story of a monk who was living in a town, I think in China, in China, with an emperor or somebody up with a lot of power who just seemed to be very, very cruel and seemed to be causing a lot of suffering. chose to hang up his robes and sneak off and be an assassin.

[68:47]

And I thought maybe you could comment on that decision and his long decision to hang up the robes. Well, there is the principle that If a bodhisattva felt that they should do something against the precepts, like for example against the precept of killing because they thought it would help beings, then they violate that precept of not killing if they think it would actually benefit beings to do so. And hopefully they have lots of other wise friends to consult about whether it actually would be helpful. But it's basically the same thing as the story I just told you. This guy wants to help the deer. he thinks it's going to help the deer if he assassinates it.

[69:53]

And I thought so too. But, you know, if all the assassins, you know, I'm not that busy, but I could get really busy if I said, I welcome all assassins to come and check out with me beforehand whether it's really going to be helpful. you know, maybe I would just leave the gun center and open this shop where all assassins on the planet had to clear my office first. And they had to convince me that it was going to help people. But I probably should, it would be really a big job because there's so many people who think killing people is helpful that I have a lot of people to talk to. And I probably would need some Little grandchildren to come in occasionally to make some space. But at this point in my life, it would be pretty hard for anybody to convince me that killing that person is going to be helpful.

[70:56]

This isn't just stopping this person from doing something. This is killing them, right? So again, and so capital punishment, I could be in the position of all capital punishment needs to be asked me to see if they can convince me that it's a good idea to execute this person. So this monk who did that, I wasn't there for him to say, I think this would be helpful if I kill this emperor. And for him to say to me, you know, can I try to convince you? But I'm not convinced that he did the right thing. In principle, if it really would be beneficial to somebody to so-called kill them, of course you should do it. You should take on anything bad for yourself to help them. Like inhale poison if it helps other people. Killing someone could be poison to the killer. But if it helps the other person, OK.

[71:57]

But please show me that it helps them. How are we going to find that out? What helps them are the other people. Maybe it doesn't help the dead ever, but maybe it helps the 20,000 subjects. Yeah, so bring the 20,000 subjects. So I have a big job. And wait to kill them and tell them. And the 20,000 subjects say, don't wait. And they say, well, I'm sorry. It's been set up that assassins have to give my support. And it's going to take a long time to convince me. And people say, well, we are fired. You're too slow in processing these assassination requests. Or the execution requests. But that's what's going on in the world now is that it's become such a big job to process the request to execute people that it's really getting slowed down because it's so expensive. It's getting close to 1030, and there's still quite a few hands.

[73:01]

So Steve, and Salah, and Jill. Steve? A couple days ago you talked about social intimacy versus social disease, and I thought it was very compelling. And I wondered if you had any particular practices you could experiment with here. I think the first thing that comes to mind, see, I heard you say something, I was listening to you, and then I heard listening. I heard listening. That's the first thing. Listening is not social busyness. So if you're walking around Green Gulch, you're listening. You're not walking around talking. Maybe you are.

[74:06]

But anyway, you're listening first. So when you meet people, listen to them. And then listen to yourself. And listen to them. And listen to yourself. If they're quiet, listen to yourself. And then if you hear the idea that maybe you should say something, listen to that. And then consider whether that's going to, it's coming from nervousness or busyness or insecurity or you're trying to fix something. Just listen to that. And if you feel that you have something to say that you think would promote intimacy that would be in the spirit of helping you and somebody else that you have in this social relationship become more intimate, then maybe you could ask the person if you could say something to them.

[75:12]

May I say something to you? Do you have a moment? Could I say something? Do you have a moment for me to say something? Give them a chance to say, for example, actually now is not a good time. During this intensive, if you would say that to people, a lot of people would say, if they were honest, they would say, actually now is not a good time. I'm actually trying to work quietly, or I'm trying to actually be quiet right now. During this time, a lot of people, for whatever reasons, there's many stories about this, but people do, but they're in this situation. There's stories about how this happens, and here's the story. Not the story about how it happens, but this is the story. The story is, in a situation like this, people start to open up. When a group of people get together and try to cultivate samadhi and be still

[76:15]

and open, they start to open to their vulnerability. In question and answer, somebody asked about vulnerability. And I said, we're already vulnerable. But sometimes we open to it. So when you're practicing samadhi, you're opening. So one of the things you're open to is your vulnerability. So I think a lot of people are opening in their samadhi practice, so they're also feeling more vulnerable. So when somebody comes up to them and says, could I talk to you, they might actually feel like, you know, I'm feeling so vulnerable right now, I'm not ready to talk. So everybody you want to talk to may be aware that they actually don't have a sign on them saying, I'm feeling vulnerable, so be careful of me. But a lot of people are feeling like that because they're practicing samadhi. But there's a way that we can become intimate even when we're feeling vulnerable.

[77:18]

If people would be really gentle with us, and we would be gentle with ourselves. When we're gentle with ourselves, we feel more vulnerable. being gentle with yourself, you open to your vulnerability. And when you are more gentle and more open to your vulnerability, then if people would ask you, you're maybe more able to say, you know, I'm feeling really vulnerable now, so you can talk to me, but please be careful. So if you want to talk to somebody, you think it would be helpful, it's good to check to see if they're up for it. And then watch and listen to them, but also look at them. And you may feel like they say, okay. And you feel like, really? Are you really? And they say, well, actually, no, I don't want to talk now. As many of you know, you do come up to me and ask me if you can talk to me.

[78:25]

You do. And I usually say yes. Not always, but I usually say yes. But often, as you may have noticed, I take you someplace else to talk. Because I feel this is not a good place to talk. We're too vulnerable to dishes and stuff like that flying by. So we go to maybe some quieter place to talk. So this kind of consideration that every conversation is really potentially a conversation with somebody who's feeling vulnerable. They may not look like it, but so you need to take care of them. If you want to talk to them, get in a situation where if they're vulnerable, And then you might feel like, well, I don't see a situation like that. Well, then maybe you can't talk to them right now because there's too many people around or whatever. Sometimes you can say something to somebody when they're in a quiet place where they've been prepared, which if you say in a busy place where there's lots of other people, it overwhelms them.

[79:34]

And a lot of people just, you know, like toughen up and get through it, but then later they feel really, you know, they crash because they had to like get so defended to like get through the conversation. This happens to people who are practicing samadhi, that they practice it but then they don't have enough skill to take care of their samadhi, so then they use old skills of defense and then and then they get really pooped out from all that energy they did to like get through something that they really weren't up for. So that's why we have the quiet dining room is because a lot of people want to be in, are feeling vulnerable and aren't ready for the intensity of the talking that happens in the later part of the dining room meals. And then at regular times at Green Gulch, sometimes we have so much energy here that it's really hard for people to open up.

[80:46]

But even in those situations, if we're careful with each other, that can promote samadhi. Even in a noisy situation, if you're really careful of yourself and others, you can actually work on samadhi in the hubbub. But you have to be really careful. Otherwise, it's not helpful. And pass up on something that's not helpful, which you might really feel a lot of energy to deal with, because it would be helpful if it was time, but it's not time. Buddha says, I should check this, but anyway, the Buddha says, if you want to say something, first of all, is it true? Second, is it helpful? And there's a third point, which I can't remember. I should find it. No, there's a third one. Is it necessary? And the fourth point is, is it the right time? Is it the right time is at the last of the list, because if everything else is satisfied, okay.

[81:53]

But is it the right time? And sometimes it's helpful, truthful, necessary. It's necessary, but it's not the right time. Yes, but, you know, if we can't wait for this assassination to be approved, it's not the right time. If it's not the right time, the other things can be satisfied, but not right time can make it a disaster. So that's what I, this is social life and this way of, and it's a, what do you call it? It's not busyness even though it's very, it's very rigorous. A lot of work, but it's not busyness because it's for social intimacy. It's not just to be busy. Okay, is that enough for this morning? Is that okay, Salah? Is it really?

[82:56]

Almost? Let's just sit here for a little bit. Let me know if you feel it's truthful, it's helpful, necessary, and it's the right time. It's definitely the right time for us to be quiet and give you time to look at that. Okay. Dogen says, when somebody comes to visit you, give them a seat and give them some water.

[84:08]

And sometimes there's no seat around, but kind of like give people a seat and then, in some sense, give them some place to be and then talk to them. Thank you very much.

[84:34]

@Transcribed_v005
@Text_v005
@Score_90.26