A Family Style for Realizing the Oneness of All Families 

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it looks like I repeat myself over and over and here's another example of that the teachings of the Buddhas are primarily concerned with living beings matter of fact one of the teachings is that Buddhas are nothing in addition to living beings so

[01:04]

within within living beings there is a concern for their welfare there is a concern for their suffering there is compassion for living beings and that's the main business of the Buddhist teaching is to help living beings to address and bring compassion to their suffering and it is part of the teaching that comes through this compassion is that the suffering is dependent on living beings who are involved in grasping, grasping their life experience, grasping their ideas, their feeling tone, their bodily

[02:05]

experiences and so on all the different realms of experience when they're grasped they are suffering there they become stressful and distressful and unsatisfactory life when you really accept life you realize it cannot be grasped when you grasp life you kind of insult it and stress it and this is suffering and the teaching is for living beings who have this tendency and this tendency is supported by past actions based on this tendency of grasping and the grasping comes because of misconception of life we we are innately inclined to see life as something that could be grasped we see life as as a

[03:06]

substantial thing that could be grasped we see ourselves as substantial and others as substantial we see things as permanent so that you could reach for something and it would still be there by the time you touched it so the early teachings of Buddha were to teach beings that all the phenomena which beings tend to grasp are really impermanent and unsubstantial insubstantial and and if you try to grasp them they are suffering and the later teaching of the great vehicle is that all phenomena are just all the things we're experiencing are just cognitive constructions they're just ideas and of course we can grasp ideas and then that grasping life as the ideas we

[04:15]

have of it is another way to say speak of the cause of suffering so the teaching that that all that we're dealing with is our idea of our life that teaching when we understand it when we understand that teaching we enter into the reality of our life and the reality of our life is that it is insubstantial it is ungraspable and it is infinite so that's an example of a message which now has been converted into ideas right now that we now have an idea of the teaching that what we're dealing

[05:16]

with is our idea of our life and so the teaching also appears to us as in in the form of a word image or linguistic imagery which we are inclined to convert all of our experience into linguistic imagery and even the messages from the Buddhas we also do that with even the message of the teaching even the messages about the practice we convert into something which fits with our usual karmic life so our karmic life can receive these teachings and practice these teachings but we receive these teachings and then we convert them into stuff that our karma can work on and Bodhisattvas receive the teaching that way as their ideas of the teachings

[06:24]

now one might say well the teachings the teachings aren't our idea of them but it's not like the teachings are some other substantial thing that's not our idea of them they're not some like something that's like substantially not our ideas of them they're neither our ideas of them nor are they not our ideas of them really because saying they're not our idea of them puts them in the category of not our idea of them so they're beyond our ideas and they're beyond being our ideas or not being our ideas and all these teachings are really just to help us realize that the way we already are actually is exactly what we all want the

[07:37]

way we already are is exactly already that we're helping each other but that's hard to understand because we imagine sometimes that we're not helping each other it looks like that in the world of thought construction like it looks like some people don't like the president of the United States and some people do it looks like horrible things are happening all over the planet but it isn't that we deny the things that horrible things are appearing it's that we listen to the horrible things and look at the horrible things that we're already listening to and looking at and we listen to teachings about how to take care of these

[08:41]

horrible appearances or nice appearances and if we listen to these teachings and listen to these teachings there is a teaching that after we listen to these teachings enough we will actually be transformed to a place our listening to the teaching will transform us into a way of being that enters into reality if we listen to these teachings and listen to these teachings we will start practicing compassion according to what we have listened to what we have and we have listened to our version of what is being told to us we're being told how to practice we convert what we're being told or shown into our idea of it and then we practice according to our idea and if we continue this practice we become transformed to a point where we enter into the reality of our

[09:46]

relationships so one of the things that seems to be necessary is a great deal of listening to the teaching those who enter this into reality are supported by the permeations or the perfumings of our body and mind that occur when we listen to the teachings over and over when we think of the teachings which we have heard and read we think of them we listen to them we look at them and we spend our time permeating our life with the teachings and these teachings these teachings become seeds which become merged with

[10:56]

correct study of these teachings these seeds which are the effects of our listening enter and are merged with correct reflection on these teachings and these teachings appear as so one way to say it is as doctrines and their meaning or texts scriptures words of teachers the words of the Buddhas and treatises which help us understand them treatises which help us meditate on them that's how the teachings appear to us so that's what's been happening today is you've been listening to texts and

[11:57]

treatises you've been listening to doctrines and suggestions about their meaning and this has transformed our minds as we've listened to these things and then we come to actually have insight into these teachings but again even as we have insight we have insight about these how these teachings appear in a way that we can find them to have insight about still even though we're still apprehending the teachings which we're having insights about we still can enter reality while we're still apprehending and then once we enter we continue to practice and we stop apprehending the

[13:00]

images which we used to enter and then we continue the practices of compassion and the practices of listening to the teachings and the practices of contemplating the practices and the teachings we continue to do it without apprehending the images that we used to apprehend we do the practice from simply being immersed in the reality which is the practice and then someone raises a flower and winks and we smile and someone says something about us and we listen to them and we we practice according to what they said in the same

[14:10]

way that we practiced according to what we said heard before any questions yes what I am holding and grasping is the images, is the fear, is all of my, all the stuff that I'm grasping that's right you're not actually grasping the fear you're grasping an image of the fear yeah yeah so that's right you're grasping images of your life right and even though you're grasping images of your life it still causes problems you're actually fortunately you can't get a hold of your life so your

[15:12]

life's actually okay but if you grasp the images of your life your life's okay but the grasper is stressed the grasping the grasping being is stressed the life is actually untouched but the grasping is stressed is a stress factor and is a stress being oh good so now bring compassion to that bring compassion to that stress area where there's grasping any further questions yeah so let's bring let's bring compassion to that

[16:21]

tightening shall we all right are you ready to let compassion come to that tightening I want to say I'm ready but maybe I don't know maybe I'm not I'm just I'm wondering well we let's start there you want to say you're ready you want to say you're ready okay that's a start now if you see someone who's tense and tight what do you want to do for them I want to let them be yeah yes you want to let them be so now do you want to let your tightness be well I don't mind that it's easy yeah so it's okay that it's

[17:23]

easy I don't mind if it's hard I don't mind that either the thing is you want to let it be that's what you do with other people's tightness right you let it be now do it with your own tightness let it be that's an act of kindness that's an act of generosity wait a second the next thing I don't want to let it be do you want if someone else doesn't want to let something be what do you want to do with that person ah you will get the understanding if you keep letting it be you have to keep letting you can't find out what things are unless you let them be so you start by letting them be and then you just keep your heart pulsing with let it be let it be let it be that's not the whole story but that you just keep that the whole time as you're trying to understand what this tightness is let it

[18:24]

be let it be let it be okay and now we move on to be careful of this tightness be careful not to try to get rid of it because we're letting it be right don't try to kill it don't try to kill this tension because you want to understand it right so if you kill it before you understand it you're not going to get to understand it also we don't say bad things about the tightness and we don't say that somebody's better that's something that the untied people are better than the tight people and we're not possessive of the tightness if somebody says could you loan me your tightness we say fine if you're trying to understand tightness you might say well if I give you my tightness I won't be able to understand it no no if you've got tightness and somebody needs it and you give it away that will help you understand it don't lie and also be honest about the tightness somebody says got some tightness there you say yep I

[19:24]

got it would you give it to me fine would you hate it no thank you would you be possessive no do you disparage it in any way no and so on you practice being careful and gentle and kind to this tightness which you're fundamentally letting it be but then you're getting into intimately letting it be carefully letting it be now then you move on to be patient with this tightness in other words you're not trying to get rid of it and you're being totally present with it so this is all moving towards eventually understanding this thing and then next you need to like check go back now and check on your aspiration to understand and help all beings become free of whatever problems they have and then

[20:26]

realize that it would really be good if you could continue to do the practices of kindness towards this tension towards this tightness and now also if you could be really calm and alert and open to it and that you really would like to be really calm with it so now you now with all these practices you can really see it clearly because you're really calm and not messing with it and then you're ready to see it and enter into understanding yeah so I'm saying that we need to already caught we need to realize that there's a state of concentration which is both calm not both it's calm it's focused it's alert it's open it's flexible it's bright and it's joyful we need all this energy all

[21:32]

this kind of we need this kind of a state to be with for example tightness painful tightness we need all this to be present with that in order to now enter it in this reality and if you don't know how to do the concentration and all those aspects then you practice letting that be letting your concentration which isn't fully developed be that way and then be careful of any flaw in your concentration be honest about it be generous towards it be honest about it be careful of it be honest about the flaws be gentle with the flaws study the flaws be patient with the flaws and then again try to do the practice in such a way that you become free of the flaws in your concentration most of the flaws the concentration are because of not completing earlier practices which

[22:34]

the constant which the full you know the kind of concentration that really is temporary relief from what from our ideas about things it's temporary relief from grasping so in the concentration you actually get temporary relief from the tightness which you're studying and then when you're somewhat relieved from this when you're relieved from the tightness which you're trying to understand you are that will aid your understanding so yeah what yeah well we do need we do need acuteness and sharpness and we need

[23:39]

acuteness and sharpness without pedantry we need it without being pedantic which means which means what do you call it overly concerned with being overly concerned with being acute and sharp you need to be acute and sharp without being overly a concern with with the practice of being acute and sharp in other words you need to be open to being dull and blunt you know those samurai stories I've heard they're made of two kinds of steel one that's sharp and well one that's brittle actually one that's hard and brittle and if you use that kind of sword you hit something with it it will break but you need that hard brittle thing but you also need the soft

[24:42]

flexible steel so they combine the hard brittle with the soft flexible concentration in order to cut means those two qualities it needs to be sharp and acute and pointed and soft and open and relaxed that kind of mind will give you relief from the attack from the ideas that are causing suffering and then not only to get temporary relief but then you actually get to go in and see how they really are first of all get relief from the way they aren't and then enter into how they really are get relief from misconception and be relaxed with it and then from the relieved place of the misconception then enter into reality any other questions

[25:45]

yes I thought the process was along the lines of like the saying is the horse arrives before the donkey leaves so that you you practice with the apprehensions wisdom arrives in the way of entering reality before you even comprehend what that reality is I mean you have you have that entering but you're still interpreting within the apprehension in a sense so isn't there an interaction of the reality entering into the apprehension and maybe influencing that the evolution of the apprehension you're describing like the apprehension evolves to a point where you enter reality but when you say apprehension you mean like grasping or interpretation even when the reality enters interpretation but also grasping the interpretation okay so that's that

[27:00]

situation of grasping of an interpretation that seems graspable and now we're talking that's the donkey right so you're talking about the horse coming before the donkey leaves right so horse comes donkeys there horse comes and what happens then well the horse understands the donkey apprehension doesn't understand non apprehension no so wisdom is actually not apprehending things including not apprehending apprehension so but wisdom studies apprehension wisdom wisdom arises from being kind to apprehension we've got plenty of apprehension we've got plenty of grasping okay now we need to bring compassion to it and we need to bring concentration to it and now I'm going to bring compassion and concentration to the grasping and all the

[28:02]

afflictions around the grasping the afflictions calm down and in that calming of the afflictions around the apprehension the apprehension also seems to be temporarily relieved we don't we don't really when it's almost like the grasping is reduced to zero however that's enough but the horse still hasn't arrived but the donkey has not been eliminated the horse still has to come and understand the donkey and the horse can understand the donkey even though the conditions which are supporting the arrival of the wisdom are actually a kind of a calming down of the whole problems with the donkey the donkey is still there but there's no problems with it anymore it's kind of like we're relieved of the suffering of the donkey but the donkey hasn't been

[29:03]

like annihilated it's just been kind of like what do you call it it just everything's calm around it now so now we can look at the donkey in a calmer situation we look at the donkey in an enhanced environment where the donkey is not a problem anymore so donkey haven't really left it's just it's just become available for profound understanding which is the horse and also the horse understands that the donkey is no different from the horse donkey doesn't understand that but the horse does that's the story there yes so I've heard it said that philosophy is the love of wisdom, but do you think it might be more accurate to say that philosophy is the love of apprehension? that's more that's more of the Buddhist way yeah philosophy is more the

[30:07]

apprehension philosophy is more the love of delusion yeah thank you for thank you very much for that philosophy Buddhist philosophy is a love of delusion of ignorance because Buddha's philosophy is the love of sentient beings it's loving sentient beings it's not liking sentient beings it's loving them it's loving them not to death but to non-duality with Buddha we just love all unenlightened beings into a state that they're already in because as I said earlier Buddhas are nothing in addition to all the unenlightened beings so if you just love all the enlightened beings you get Buddha I mean if you love it all the way and loving unenlightened beings means loving unenlightenment it means loving

[31:08]

the causes that they're suffering and and if you really love it all the way you have Buddha's wisdom and Buddhist philosophy is for Buddha's wisdom and Buddhist philosophy is also partly for Buddhist compassion so Buddhist philosophy teaches practices so we'll be able to love ignorance our practices of loving ignorance so we can love ignorance all the way to wisdom well I thank you again for another what might be called spectacular day of practice spectacular in the sense that it's been a spectacle and there's a spectator some spectators some of you have been spectators probably but also I

[32:13]

propose to you that the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas have been watching the show and they really appreciate your effort thank you very much way beings are numberless I love to save them

[32:54]

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