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The Bodhisattva Way of Friendship in the Face of Fear

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AI Summary: 

The talk centers on the Bodhisattva ideal of embracing silence and stillness as means for compassionately engaging with fear, highlighting the notion of "friendship for fear" and the inherent simplicity yet profound challenge in practicing generosity without any desire for personal gain. Central to this exploration is the Flower Ornament Sutra, which offers teachings on limitless giving and compassion as intrinsic to awakening. The practice of patience and generosity in the face of ongoing suffering, and the role of spiritual teachings and leaders in embodying these virtues, underscores the dialogue.

  • Flower Ornament Sutra (Avatamsaka Sutra): This sutra is foundational to the talk's exploration, emphasizing limitless teachings contained in every experience and promoting a life without the pursuit of attainment.
  • Fleurs du Mal by Charles Baudelaire: Cited in relation to the challenge of maintaining focus amidst boredom, described as a potential demon in spiritual practice.
  • Buddhist Teachings on Fear and Compassion: Discussed to illustrate the Bodhisattva's path of practicing friendship and compassion without intent to gain, embodying Buddha's awakening.
  • Diamond Sutra: Mentioned in relation to patience and understanding in the timeless practice of Bodhisattva ideals.
  • Historical Buddha: Referenced for originally seeing the truth of non-gaining as liberating all beings, instrumental in the turning of the Dharma wheel.
  • Example of Islamic and Sufi Historical Context: Used to illustrate the conversion by compassion and generosity, paralleling Buddhist methods of peaceful teaching.
  • The Story of a Samurai: Presented to exemplify teachings on true compassion and understanding conveyed in transformative encounters.

AI Suggested Title: "Embracing Stillness for Compassionate Awakening"

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Transcript: 

silence and stillness bodhisattvas are devoted to silence and stillness and they are devoted to it for the welfare of the world they practice in silence and stillness from which are based on they practice compassion for all beings. And by the way, they do so with nothing to attain. So today is the 12th of July.

[01:13]

And the 12th of July is the birthday of a very dear friend of ours, whose name is Brother David Stendlerost. And today he's 99. And yesterday he sent me a birthday greeting Because my birthday is two days before his. So it makes it easy on me because he sends me the birthday greeting. It reminds me to send him one. And this year I said, 99 years. And he still has the life of love to send a birthday greeting to me. I get the special birthday greeting because my birthday is so close to his. And between us, between my birthday on the 10th and his birthday on the 12th is another event called the Feast of St.

[02:24]

Benedict. And he's a Benedictine monk. So we have this wonderful little, this beloved tradition of wishing each other well on our birthdays. It helps me that mine's before his. And I thank all of you for your wonderful birthday good wishes on a birthday of an old Zen monk. And also on New Year's, people wish the old monk well. And they ask the old monk, please live another year. Please continue to stay in this world of difficulty. So we can practice with you.

[03:25]

And it really is encouraging. Thanks for asking me to do so. Last night somebody said, did you have a nice birthday? I said, it was really hard. It was really hard, my birthday. Day before yesterday. Because I'm packing, and packing is, I'm having a hard time packing. It's very tiring. What should I do with this cup? What? Anyway. But your good wishes lift me up and make me willing to continue to pack. But it's difficult. But again, because you're asking me to stay in this world with you, okay, I feel some enthusiasm for this difficult life.

[04:29]

And about two years ago, Just about two years ago, around the time of a birthday two years ago, I felt inspired to commit to devote perhaps 10 years to the study of a great spiritual scripture, the flower adornment scripture. If I have 10 more years, great. So let's swim out into this immense teaching. And we've been doing it for two years. This immense teaching to help us understand there's nothing to attain. And not to forget it.

[05:34]

in order to help this world, which is, as you know, a world where people are trying to attain something. It's normal that we try to get something, but the life of trying to get something is, if I may say to adults, it's a life of suffering. The life of giving without trying to get anything is a life of joy. It doesn't get away from the suffering. It gives compassion to the suffering without trying to get anything for it. Such a simple message. Why do we have this big sutra? Well, to realize that teaching. It's so simple and it's so difficult So, read this sutra, which will be difficult, to help you do the difficult thing of something that's so simple.

[06:43]

Just be with whatever's happening with great compassion. Just be generous with whatever's happening. That's all. Just be careful and tender and respectfully and gentle with whatever. Just be patient with all these pains. And because we're patient, we can be enthusiastic about doing this very difficult work of living in the world with all beings. And then remember silence and stillness, and then understand and awaken. So, huge sutra, so many amazing teachings to help us understand if we're resisting the simple practice.

[08:00]

And it's good to start again with some basic example. This sutra says that every... atom in the universe contains limitless teachings. Every feeling, every atom of feeling, every atom of opinion, every atom of judgment contains limitless sutras and the sutras contain limitless universes. So someone comes to talk to me and they don't necessarily talk about how the way they're feeling includes infinite universes. They don't necessarily say that. They might say something like, I don't want to be afraid.

[09:09]

People say that to me. You're probably not surprised that people say that to me. I don't want to be afraid. And then just a couple of days ago, someone said that to me. And guess what I said? I said, okay. But then after I said, okay, I said something about what? About the way. of the bodhisattva, which is to be compassionate to the fear. And I've made a little note, FFF. Friendship for fear. The bodhisattva way is friendship for fear. You don't have to like your friends.

[10:14]

And you don't have to hate your friends. It's not necessary. But you might. But that's not friendship. Friendship is to be completely there for your friend without trying to get anything. That is peace. That is silence and stillness. That's what we call Zen practice. To be there completely for your friends. To be completely there for every one of your own experiences. Your experiences are your friends. They're calling for your friendship. Fear is calling for graciousness and respect and patience.

[11:27]

It's calling for love. That's the kind of friendship it wants. in our interactions with others and if we look in our own mind we may notice fear we may notice fear and we may notice that fear is uncomfortable painful the teaching is that that discomfort and that pain is calling for attention is calling for to be listened to is calling for great compassion. And great compassion is not trying to get rid of the call.

[12:30]

It's not trying to get rid of the pain. It's not trying to get rid of the fear. It's not trying to get anything. It's just total devotion and total generosity. with no room or possibility to gain anything. This is Buddha's awakening. When Buddhas are awakened, they don't get anything. They're just completely giving themselves to everything, and everything is giving themselves to Buddha. This is their awakening. This is what this huge book's about, is Buddha's being given gifts by all beings and saying thank you and returning the favor. But some of the beings who give gifts to Buddhas are beginners in the Buddha way and they actually give gifts to Buddha trying to get something.

[13:35]

Did you get that? And even some of the great teachers have admitted that in the past, They gave gifts to Buddhas and tried to get something. The great teachers tried that same trick of giving something to Buddhas to try to get something. And the Buddhas gently showed them that they were doing that over and over and over. And finally... They gave themselves to awakening without trying to get it. All along, awakening was giving itself to them without trying to get anything. And even though awakening was saying, I'm giving myself to you without trying to get anything, the person who received the gift thought, that's great, thank you so much, now I want to get something from you. You've given me a gift and now I want to give you one to get something.

[14:43]

In other words, I don't want to be like you, Buddha. Or rather, I would like to be like the Buddhas, but there's some kind of habit that's interfering. Like, for example, boredom. How boring to serve and not get anything. To sit and not get anything. How boring. But that boring is, if you'll excuse the expression, is a demon, is an affliction. And that, as I mentioned to somebody in the poem, the big poem Fleur de Mal by Baudelaire, towards the beginning, he points out, or he suggests, that when the demons of hatred and greed and confusion... When those demons back off and leave you to sit in this life and just be here and give yourself to all beings, at that moment, they send in the big guns.

[15:54]

Boredom. In French, ennui. That comes in when you're actually doing quite well. You actually have let go of greed, hate, and delusion. Amazing. I'm just here in this world and feeling grateful to it and not trying to get anything. And then, wait a minute. Wait a minute. I think you're overlooking something. Restlessness. Boredom comes. And that's a harder one to say. Oh, darling, you can be here too. I know what you're trying to do. You're trying to complicate this simple practice of just completely being generous with no gaining idea. And you can keep calling me silly for doing it.

[16:58]

And I would be silly if I fall for your trick and try to do something to get something. And also in this temple, also just a few days ago, I was in that room down the hall and someone came in to meet me and she said, kind of right away she said, as I age, I see more and more how intensely I'm trying to get away from what's happening. And I said, maybe, maybe you're doing it more than you used to. And she wasn't saying that she didn't do it in the past. She's actually saying she's doing more than she used to do it. What? To try to escape from what's happening here.

[18:04]

Just noticing more. Yeah, you could say, well, can you just notice a little more? As you mature, you're noticing how much you do that. Which is not happy news exactly. To notice how you're trying to escape is not... There's the pain and then there's the pain of trying to get away from it. So noticing that is awakening. It's becoming awake. Buddha notices that beings are trying to get away from their life. Even when they're having a warm shower, they try to get away from from the end of the shower. One of our members loved warm showers when he was a boy, and his mother said, it can only be five minutes. So as soon as he got into the shower, he started to cry. He was having pleasure, but he wanted it to go on.

[19:12]

He wanted it to go on. He tried to get the pleasure So it was this normal human situation. And I have this, I just want to show you these pictures. These are pictures of a Buddha. And this is a Buddha statue. And this Buddha statue was in Hiroshima at the time of the bomb. And it survived. And I mentioned this last month that I had a picture of this Buddha Let's survive the horror of this world. This Buddha survives the horrors and keeps generating compassion with nothing to gain. And someone said, can we have a copy of the picture? And I said, yeah, I'll bring it. So here it is. I'm going to give you these. I know you didn't come to get anything, but I'm going to give you something.

[20:18]

I know you came a long way to not get anything, and I'm going to give you something. And if you did come to get something, I'm going to give you something. Thank you. I'm going to give you something. That's what I'm going to do, because that's what our life is. Our life is to give to beings, and really, without trying to get anything, but if we notice that we are, then we give ourselves to trying to get something. Buddhas are devoted to those who are trying to get something from Buddha. Buddha is not just devoted to those who are practicing generosity. Buddha is devoted to the people who are stingy. Or at least trying to get more than they've already got. Buddha is devoted to those beings... And so we can be devoted to our own impulses to try to escape from suffering, to try to get something out of life.

[21:37]

We can notice these things. We can notice them. We can be aware of them. And you don't have to call them demons or bad habits or delusion, although they are. You can just immediately be there for them. and give yourself to them without trying to get anything. You can, we can do that. We do do that sometimes. Sometimes we just, somebody says, hello, and go, yeah. We just give them our attention. We're not trying to get anything. That's exactly what a Buddha would do. Hello? Yes. Goodbye? Bye. We can learn that. The historical Buddha thought, Originally, upon awakening to this teaching, to this truth, that there's nothing to get, and understanding that liberates all beings, he didn't understand at the beginning that his understanding liberates all beings.

[22:41]

In the early teaching, he didn't right away understand that this awakening liberates all beings. He didn't get it. So he thought... No need to mention it to people. No need to give this teaching to them because they probably wouldn't be interested. They'd probably find it boring. But then he got some encouragement and said, okay. And then the Dharma wheel started to turn. In this sutra, well into the sutra, it's 39 chapters. In the 37th chapter, the Buddha says, upon awakening, now I see that all living beings fully possess the wisdom and the virtues of Buddhas. So this Buddha in this sutra sees that we have that potential.

[23:47]

And so, okay. Great. However, because they have misconceptions and attachments, they don't realize it. Okay, so I should probably help them with these misconceptions and attachments so they can realize that they already have nothing to attain. From the beginning, we have nothing to attain, but we do need to practice. We need to do a lot of training to actually understand that. For example, we need to read this whole sutra in but when you read the sutra you can just start with the first page or the first word which I think what's the first word the first word is thus the first word of the sutra is thus

[24:51]

That's the whole sutra. And you need to read it. You need to hear thus. And then when you hear thus, okay. Did you hear it? Trying to get anything? Oh, yeah, right. It's not just thus. I want to get that. Well, it goes on for thousands of pages to help you understand the first word of the sutra. And we need to hear this word thus. And then see. Okay? I'm set. Thus. I'm set. Thus. I'm set. This is getting boring, okay? So, thus. For 2,600 pages. In the other translation. This translation is only 1,500. But it starts with thus. And it's thus all the way through. And there's nothing to gain in thus. The bodhisattva path, which goes on forever, and there's nothing to gain.

[26:02]

There's nothing to attain. And it's the true life. It's the true life. The true life of blissfully, joyfully engaging all this suffering. like this Buddha. I'm going to stay here with these beings and teach them. Put the clock on, please. Thank you.

[27:19]

So I come here today and I give you my face. Thank you for coming here and giving me your face. And I'm going to give you this face. Do you have enough? If I don't, more can be made. This is actually a reproduction. And it can be reproduced again. We'll see if there's any left over. That was no gaming idea. Oh, could you please go into the room and next to my seat there's a little black box. Would you please bring it to me? So that's a simple teaching that

[28:29]

contains infinite teachings. What's the simple teaching? Thus, what's the simple teaching? Give ourselves completely to everything, to every being, and to all beings. To each being, each being, each being, one being, and all beings. That's a simple teaching. Thank you. Is there any gift you'd like to give to the Great Assembly?

[29:39]

All right. It's her idea. Yes. When the question arose, if there was enough of these, you said, if there's not enough, it's a reproduction. And I thought of all of us here, like reproduced the reproduction of the Buddha's teaching and that we too can reproduce. Yes. I thought that was sort of the thus of the moment. Yeah. We are reproductions. Yeah. The Buddha way is about reproduction. It's about a reproducing awakening. Yeah. Keeping it alive in this world. It's about reproduction. And it's not so much about, excuse me for saying so, enough. It's endless reproduction.

[30:46]

Unless we happen to run out of beings, but I don't see that yet. Yes? When I think of gaining mind, is also what brought me here these teachings. Yeah. To relieve myself of suffering. Yeah, so you're welcome to come under the auspices of gaining mind. And thank you so much for gaining mind, for getting you here. Yeah. And I feel like this act is also, as you say, it's influencing everything around me. Yes. Even though it may be the wrong intention at times, it's also what started me in practice. Yeah, yeah. And so now we understand that this wrong intention is to be dealt with as thus. It is thus. And in order to realize that the wrong intention is also thus. The right intention is thus.

[31:48]

The wrong intention is thus. And intentions which are neither right or wrong are thus. In order to realize that all intentions are thus, we need to be compassionate to the wrong intentions because they're suffering. But part of being compassionate is to appreciate. Thank you for getting me here. Like at some anti-war demonstration, some people went up to the soldiers and said, thank you for your contribution to not having another atomic bomb dropped. Thank you. Appreciate them. Respect them. Be grateful to them. And that will wake them up. They know you don't want them. When you say that, they know you're that anti-war demonstration. But you're also grateful to these beings.

[32:51]

You love these beings. You love these soldiers. You respect them, and if you respect them, they think you're intelligent. And then they might listen to you. Yes and yes. You mentioned the conversation with somebody who said, I don't want to be afraid. And I imagined a conversation that I might have with you. Where I say, I don't want to be violent. And then you might say, befriend that violence in yourself. It's not befriend the violence. Or be compassionate. You didn't say violence. You said you wanted to be. Say that again? You did? Anyway. I said, yeah, I'm imagining I say, I don't want to be violent. Yeah.

[33:52]

Yeah, so we're talking about violence. That's easier to start there because you got that. Be compassionate to I don't want to be violent. Uh-huh. We don't have to have any violence yet. We just don't want to be. And that is calling for compassion. That's not what you said to the fear person. You advised the fear person to be compassionate to the fear. Right. Yes, the same thing. But for me, when I talk about violence, you're... You're kind of changing that little bias. No, the thing in you is I don't want to be violent. In them it's I don't want to be afraid. Yeah. The two things that people don't want. They want to get away from the pain of fear and they want to get away from the pain of violence. That's what I'm hearing. That's the presentation. And I say this wish to get away from the fear is calling for compassion. The wish to get away from violence is called for compassion.

[34:54]

Now what about violence? That's a different thing. But you didn't bring up violence. I did. You changed. How did you change? I didn't mean to change. I thought I was quoting you that you said, I don't want to be violent. Like the person said, I don't want to be afraid. And I also don't want to belabor this. I hear two wishes. both of which are calling for compassion. I didn't hear you say, I want to be violent. I didn't hear that one. You didn't hear that person say, I want to be afraid. I didn't hear the person say, I want to be afraid. I didn't hear that. No. And I didn't hear you say, I want to be violent. I didn't hear that. There's something that isn't working. It's like a little connection. Okay, something's not working. This is calling for compassion. They're not working. Is there compassion for the not working? No, I'm sad about it.

[35:55]

Is there compassion for being sad about it? Oh, I guess. We've got to find something to start the compassion thing rolling. A lot of compassion. I guess I wanted something just now to happen and you understand something I said and then I didn't think you did. Yeah. Will you kiss me? Yeah. Not only about me a kiss, but about the lack of needing a kiss. Could I just switch the question to something totally different? Sure. Although it's related. That's another question. Yes. Does the sutra... say anything about how to relate to genocide I haven't found that yet but actually mentioning genocide but it does it does talk about sentient beings who are more or less at risk of killing other sentient beings it talks about that but it doesn't say genocide it doesn't say that doesn't say that

[37:04]

In earlier times in human history, they didn't have genocide. They just would wipe out the neighborhood. So what does it say about people who might be in danger of killing other people? It says bodhisattvas bring compassion to them. Like a soldier who's got weapons, they could hurt someone. So they bring them compassion. They bring them respect to help them give up their weapons. give up any activity which would hurt beings. So if someone's equipped and ready to hurt beings, the bodhisattva goes there and disarms them. Disarms them? Yes. Whoa. But with what? Not by overpowering them, but by being compassionate. That's what disarms them. If you were super strong and took their weapon away, as soon as you went away, they just took another one. But if you give them... the bodhisattva's compassion, they will be disarmed.

[38:11]

What popped in my mind now is that the armies of Islam came up from the Arabian Peninsula into the other parts of the Near East, and then they started heading up into Turkey, and then they started to head into Central Asia. But they weren't powerful enough to disarm the Central Asian fighters. They were too tough. But they tried to beat them. So then they sent in these sweet, loving beings. And they converted Central Asia. That's the story. The Buddhists convert... the most difficult to convert. Like that famous story, a samurai goes to see a teacher and says, what's the difference between heaven and hell?

[39:24]

The teacher says, you are too arrogant to hear that teaching. There's no point in me telling you. He said, what is the difference between heaven and hell? Did you hear that part? And then the teacher says to him, you are too arrogant to understand the teaching about the difference between the two. And the samurai pulls out his sword and is about to kill the teacher. And the teacher says, this is hell. And he drops his sword, falls to the ground and says, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry that I had a violent intention. And the teacher says, this is heaven. So the Buddha teaches this, the way to help people understand.

[40:29]

The Buddha teaches in a way to help people understand. That's what the Buddha is trying to do. That's the Buddha's love. It may not look sweet, but it is generous, generous and generous. It is respectful of this being. It is patient with the pain of this being and the pain of being with them. It is enthusiastic. It is calm. no matter what is coming up for the being or in the relationship. This is my, what I call it, faith. This is my conviction. I'm really convinced. Do I sometimes get distracted? Yes. Do I notice it when I'm distracted? Sometimes. Do people help me notice? Yes. When I notice, do I practice contrition?

[41:38]

Yes, I do. And if I forget to practice confession and repentance, do I say I'm sorry that I forgot? Yes, I do. And I forget it in the soul. This is the pure and simple color of true practice. Every moment is calling for compassion. Let's see, I think Linda was next. Did you have your hand raised before? Yeah. And then Homer? Yes, Linda. The moment kind of passed, but then I kind of came back again. Isn't that interesting? What you just said. Yeah. So it was just a simple observation that that picture seems so powerful to me, because it says just kind of what he said. It's saying that, yeah. The pain and the hate and the suffering and all the changes that happen and things that come to us. Could you hold it up again?

[42:41]

Yeah. And the bomb did have an effect on this face. But basically the intention of the face is still there. You know, change in this particular form. Yeah. Yeah, but... But the intention... I am radiant. Yes. Through everything. Yeah. Mama. Thank you. I'd like to bring my attention to pure, simple color. There's that purity. Pure in a sense that there's no gain. And it is very common. Can you say pure in the sense of? No gain. No gain, no loss.

[43:41]

That's what pure, pure, simple color is when there's actual. No gain, no loss. But also, it's a pure and simple color of true practice. when you confess that you thought there was a possibility for gain. That's also a pure practice. Exactly. So therefore... There really is nothing to gain. And if we don't see that, I'm sorry, I didn't see it. So when there is a gain, which means we offer friendship to the soldiers... We offer friendship to the world. We offer friendship to one country. With the example you were talking about, how these nations of friendship, they tried to disarm the rest of the world and then to the point that they got to a lot of violence and they could not go any further.

[44:44]

I have a theory. And my theory is when they realize with their friendship they can keep going further and further and further. And that became a gain. That with no arm, with friendship, we can gain the universe, or we can go further and further. Have that thought of gaining, even if it is friendship, have that thought have not occurred? I don't know where it would have been. Okay. No gain, even when it's friendship. I come from a culture that I totally confess. Under the name of friendship, so much pain is being caused.

[45:47]

Yeah. Yeah. A friend of mine left Hungary in 1956. Mm-hmm. when the Russians came to help the Hungarian people. And they came in tanks to help the people, and people said, no, we're okay, you can go back, we're fine. You know, we are liberated already, you can go back. We're fine. And the message that they heard from the Russians was, Don't you understand? We're here. We love you. That's why we're here to liberate you. A number of our members of our community left Hungary at that time because they didn't really want the Russians to bring their tanks in.

[46:50]

They said they're out of friendship. But people didn't see it as friendship. And one way to respond in a friendly way is maybe to move to California and practice Zen. There's lots of ways to respond to it. Is that enough for this morning? Yes, Kim. To that point, so we're sitting here in California and I know there are words going on in soldiers. Yes. I mean, I have faith, I don't know if it's naive, but I have faith that by me practicing

[47:55]

compassion in whatever ways I can feel that maybe there's like the remotest possibility that that's you know trickling down somewhere you could say trickling down that's that's one way to put it I think trickling down is a little easier trickling out resonating out that's that that's that's one way to understand it but A more difficult teaching is, which is the teaching of this sutra and the Lotus Sutra, is the way you are practicing compassion with your own feelings of fear, for example, and with other people's fear and with other people's problems, the way you're practicing compassion with them is exactly the way you're practicing compassion with people in other realms of the world. It's not that it resonates out later.

[49:00]

It's right now it is pervading. This practice is right now pervading those realms. Does the war end? It doesn't seem to be. But the way to help people in that realm is to take care of what's right in front of you. And you can also go to those realms and do the practice in their face. But the way you take care of people in those wars is the way you're taking people back in California the way you're caring for people in California is the way you take care of yourself if you're in California and the way you take care of people in California if you're in Israel or Gaza is the way you take care of yourself and the people in your face in Gaza and this sutra also says this teaching It actually says, would it be difficult to serve wonderful food to starving people for eons?

[50:02]

Would that be difficult? And the answer is, yes, it would be difficult. And then it talks about even a greater service to life that you could do. Would that be difficult? That would be even greater difficult. So difficult only a Buddha would know how great it was. Compared to that, compared that to believing this teaching, it's just not even the tiniest fraction of how good it is, how difficult it is. It's very difficult to actually be completely devoted to the moment without any restlessness. With the understanding that that's not just for you to be that way. And not even for you to be that way with the people in the room with you. Which is also difficult. But that that also, by the way, is the way you're taking care of all beings.

[51:06]

And that pervades all beings. Right now. Everything. Everywhere. All at once. Right now. Thus. That is difficult to believe. And you and I have some faith in that. And the measure of our faith is how much we can do things wholeheartedly. Without like, okay, I'm talking to Kim now, but what about Mary and Ellen? How is my conversation helping them? And those thoughts too, take care of those. It's hard to believe. But without this confidence, we are half-hearted. We're saving a little bit for, you know, for somebody else, some other time, some other place. But this is everything, everywhere, all at once. And so we have the opportunity to get with that program to completely give ourselves to this moment with this person.

[52:13]

When I'm in this temple, when nobody else is here, it's the same practice. In a way, it's easier when you're all here, but it's the same practice when nobody's here but me. It's hard to be completely here. Is it harder when nobody else is here? Yeah, it kind of is harder. But it's hard now, it's hard then. It's a hard practice, but it's the good hard of the bodhisattva. Because you're trying to do something, which is inconceivably wonderful. Yes, Deborah. [...] Oh, yeah. Her son correct me. It's Deborah, not Deborah. Deborah. So in working to be wholehearted in the moment, sometimes I have trouble integrating myself in there.

[53:23]

Yeah, so you're having trouble integrating yourself. I feel like... You're having a moment of having trouble integrating yourself. Well, I feel like I'm better at being devoted... like in the moment, to someone else or to the beings around me. And so when I try to integrate myself, it feels like I am trying to gain in a way that I think, you know, I can intellectually say that taking care of myself is taking care of everyone else. There's just some gray space in there for me. For me, you gave several examples. One is, the last one you gave was... Taking care of myself is taking care of everybody else. I get that intellectually. Yeah. But do you take care of that intellectual thought? The way you take care of a suffering being? I'm not sure how to. You're not sure how to.

[54:27]

Are you doing a practice? Are you devoted to a practice that you're not sure how to do? This is about This is about being devoted to a practice that we're not sure how to do. Now you can say, well, forget that. I'm going to be devoted to a practice where I am sure. That's childish. So I'm talking to you as though you're adults, that you're actually ready to devote yourself to something and you're not sure how to do it. And then go ahead and be devoted to it anyway, even though you're not sure how to do it. I don't know, I'm not sure how to practice the Bodhisattva way, and I'm devoted to it. A child might think, I want to practice the Bodhisattva way, and I know what it is. I know I'm not doing it now, but I want to learn it, and I know what it is. This sutras has all these sages in it which say, I'm devoted to the Bodhisattva land, but how would I know what it is?

[55:36]

It's too big for me to know. But it's not too big for me to be devoted to completely. My little person can be devoted completely. It's possible. But it doesn't actually help to know what you're devoted to. It's a hindrance. It's limited to what you know how to do. Yeah. So thank you, Deborah. Deborah. Deborah. It's not Deborah, it's Deborah. Deborah. Deborah. Okay, I learned something today. Deborah. Deborah. Yes. Yes. I want to check something out with you. You brought up, some of the things you brought up today are generosity and patience. And I was, what that occurred to me is, like, I can get impatient when things aren't changing in the time frame that I think they should change.

[56:49]

Uh-huh, yeah. That was kind of like the suffering, because there's a timelessness to all this war and killing. And then the... saying and i'm not sure where it's from i think the diamond sutra that patient acceptance of dharmas that failed to be produced and then i'm thinking in my time frame like i feel like you're so i think you're saying to keep doing this bodhisattva practice in this timeless way even though the dharma might fail to be produced in my I remember my life. You could say that. Is that? No, it's not that. But you can say that, and I can respect you saying that. And one of the characteristics to look for in a bodhisattva teacher is, are they patient with the students learning really slowly?

[57:54]

LAUGHTER That's a good sign that they're patient. They love the students who are learning slowly. They don't have to be so patient with the ones who learn quickly. But the ones who are learning slowly, the bodhisattvas, are patient with how slowly they're learning and they respect them. Patience and respect for slowness. And... That connects with a timeless, endless practice. But timeless, endless practice might help you also, might support your patient's practice. Since we're doing this forever, I guess your rate is fine. You're extremely slow in learning this. And it's fine because we're going to be doing this forever. Am I giving you a message?

[59:07]

I'm giving you a message. Yes, the message is look to see if the teacher is patient with your learning process. Look to see if the teacher is respectful of your process rather than thinking the teacher wants you to get ahead of where you are. That's a sign that maybe this person... needs some help. They're not really a helper at that moment. Except that they're giving you an opportunity to be a helper. The teacher is the one who respects you the way you are as thus. And if you don't, the teacher wants to help you do respect for the way you are right now and realize that you are already thus But if you don't go along with that, the teacher is there to help you learn that.

[60:09]

I have to take these off because I'm getting a phone call. That's weird. It is weird. Whoever's calling, I'll call them back later. Okay? That's my message, is the teacher is... To help you realize you're thus. And respect you into thusness. And be gentle with you into thusness. And see if the teacher's not acting like that. You say, excuse me, may I ask a question? Are you feeling a lot of patience with me? Are you feeling respect for me? No. Oh. That's interesting. Yes. Yeah, the risk of trying your patients. There's a risk, is that? Yeah.

[61:15]

First, I would like to say that I actually really believe that you can help me with that big, very, very hard thing, and that's why I'm here. And I want to say something in another scale, which is I think you... have maybe unconsciously put forth a stereotype of two religions in something you said earlier. You used the Islamic armies as a kind of default for aggressive and violent armies, and you used Buddhism as the sweet and wonderful, beautiful religion that went up and got the central agents. It wasn't Buddhism, by the way, it was Islam. Oh, you said something about sweet religions. Something sweet got the... Yeah, it was the sweet Islamic practitioners. The loving, gentle Islamic practitioners converted the people in Central Asia to Islam. Is that something you just made up?

[62:16]

About the sweet... Well, I made it up, but I was stimulated by stories of Islamic history. That the Islamic armies went in, but they couldn't take their arms away. So then these... gentle Sufis went in there and they charmed them into dropping their weapons and these people became Islamic people because they were shown this love of the Islamic sages like Rumi and so on although Rumi didn't do that particular thing his disciples did and they were the ones who actually converted these powerful warriors it wasn't the Buddhists But the Buddhist did the same thing in India and China. They went to China and they made the Chinese people love them. I'm glad I asked because I didn't get that. That's what you were talking about in Central Asia. Yeah. It was Islam sometimes uses power. All of the religions and all of the cultures sometimes use power.

[63:20]

And Buddhism sometimes use power. But we're talking about the Bodhisattvas who don't use power. They're given power which they share. generously. And that converts people when they give their power. And Islam is able to do that. Brother David is able to do that. Baal Shem Tov is able to do that. All the religions have some people who understand what this life's about. And it's about generosity without trying to get anything. And that's what really disarms people. The other kinds of things are temporary disarmament. This is the never-ending work of disarming and equipping people with these skills. Okay? Thank you. You're welcome. Yes? I noticed an amazing scroll on the wall.

[64:21]

Where it came from? Well, one story is my wife brought it into the house. and she brought it from her mother and so this is a family heirloom I don't know how old it is but it is wonderful and during work period today I would like to raise it up a little higher because the weights are touching the ground yeah it's a delightful scene of enjoying human beings at peace these people are at peace With the trees and the water and the mountains. Shall we take a little break now? I won't say if it's enough. It's okay. Shall we take a little break now? Okay. You'd like lunch? If we could have lunch, yep. That would be fun. I'm hungry, man.

[65:23]

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