Buddha Activity

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there's a lot of interest
and practice

there's also a lot of interest in practice
and has also a lot of interest in enlightenment

i have not done a survey
i don't think i will about who is interested in practice
who is interested in enlightenment and who is interested in practice enlightenment

and without doing a survey i can tell you something about me
which is that i'm interested and practice
enlightenment and practice enlightenment
and i fail
i thought that i really the center of my interest is that my central interest as practice enlightenment
it's not that i'm not interested in practice
or it's not that i'm not interested in enlightenment it's not that it just said i don't need to be but i do need to be interested in practice in light mud
i need to

and by the way what i need to be interested in and devoted to which i'm calling practice enlightenment
the it you may have noticed and includes practice and enlightenment
did you
that's why don't have to be concerned about practice and enlightenment
because they're they're included in while i'm interested in

the last time we had a sitting here i think was in the past

and that sitting was following january intensive i think i never told the people happened during that sitting something about what we're
what we're what we're interested and during the january intensive
did i did that happen and what did i say bring what did i say we're working on in january intensive and a bear remember


and she wasn't not the january intensive but chick was here last time right and that's right that's that's what we we're working on to some extent during the january and of people were interested in some other things but that was sort of what was the
the has what's the most important thing
dear grace i'm admit that that was our theme or one of our themes
and intimacy
we finally just said and
but ah it's not really and intimacy intimacy is a potential most important thing so for some people ah
like some ancestors of i obsessed lineage
the most important thing was intimacy

so some of you are familiar with it ah
the service we do over greek origin
santa cruz and say and as times as presents under way which had the names of ancestors
and one of our ancestors and we say is
dhawan concave dai osho
which is japanese way of saying his chinese name dough on concrete
and on country had an attendant has a tendency name was
yeah rio's on enercon so relies on hancock was the attendant of no on
he carried on conscious robes
carry this role for him and one day as he was handing the teacher the robe the teacher said
jazz attended watch the most important thing under this role

actually that sort of an elaboration of what he said he said what's the thing under the robe
when that character thing also could be translated as business or job
chinese character means phenomena thing job business
what's the most important affair what's the most important business was the most important thing under this robes that were that were wearing
and that the attendant couldn't say anything
and so then the teacher said okay
now you ask me so the attendant asked a teacher once the most important thing under
the patch room
and the teacher said intimacy

said hell say it again
drayson what what is hell now it's a different story
yeah if you if you ah if you mentioned later on bring that went up to but it's similar as a similar story quite similar because oh i forgot part of the story
after the student couldn't say anything the teacher said
to wear this rome
and not reach and this realm one round the realm under the rome
do not reach the realm of the business under the rome there's some business under the robe and to wear the robe and not reach the business under the rome
there's most painful
thank you so you that still different store i don't so
to there's business or of the robe and to wear the robe and not know the businesses is to miss out on the business and missing out on the business that's your business
missing out on the business of being here business is most painful

earlier in the past but not too long ago i brought up something about
that i was interested in
winter member
timmerman brought something about yeah i was twice i was interested in it
practice enlightenment practice enlightenment is
two words right kind of
it's there are two words
for one word
what's the one word
intimacy practice enlightenment two words for
intimacy intimacy as one word for two words
another word for intimacy is go ahead and to say what is it
that's two words
no no
zazen sizes another word for
practice enlightenment intimacy so again during the january intensive word
we're bringing up the issue of what's the most important thing what's the most important not what the two most important what's the most important thing
intimacy zazen practice enlightenment
somebody could say people were allowed to say enlightenment
and there were allowed to say practice to that doesn't somebody else get as i mentioned somebody else could say the most important thing is my baby

there's a lot of possible answers to that question but anyway
here we are
and so during the intensive i i i brought that up and asked people what it is and people said various things in response and then we and that by the way is sometimes what we
what i might call faith
and i also maybe i don't know mentioned it not too many times but back and nineteen eighty six but when i became abbot of zen center as i've stood on the mountain and i said
you know my faith is awesome
my faith is practice enlightenment
which includes practice and enlightenment but it isn't just include them
it's the non duality of them the intimacy of them
that's my face that's what i'm betting on and this life i'm betting on a practice which is in which is enlightenment and i'm betting on an enlightenment which is practice some people have other kinds of enlightenment i think i've heard about and they're very happy with those
but does some of those practices don't include some of those enlightened as don't include practice and some people learn a lot of people are doing practice
and they don't think it's enlightenment during practice to to get enlightenment that it is a practice but
i'm on emphasizing the practice to get enlightenment
i'm emphasizing the practice
often my map
that's my faith that's what i aspire to that's what i and that's the practice that i am doing is a practice which is
which is
when i want i'm going to practice which is the practice of my life i wanna where it's the present
which is not distinguished from the goal
even though this would like to things i want to live a life which doesn't
get trapped by the apparent separateness the way i am and complete perfect enlightenment
which will seems come like whoa whoa deferred
and yet
i don't want to into a trap of that distinction so i want to give up that distinction and i'm i am devoted to unsurpassed complete perfect enlightenment as practice and practice as that
so that's sort of what we talked about
during the intensive
and then now we have a new practice period and the topic of the new practice period
is buddha activity
which is two words right motor activity
so it's another one
that's the most important thing now
because bot activity is
practice enlightenment
so like got you gotta buddha
gay then you get what you have any have a buddha as you have a practice
they have a gorilla like a buddha and then another thing called a practice of a buddha
you have a practicing buddha
which we call
the intimacy which recalls zazen
so now we're jason language practice
practicing buddha or buddha practice buddha activity
so as the theme of the practice spirit and it's a class in berkeley
what the same title and i i mentioned who and and more than one place and now in another place that the yoga room when they announced the classes there that i offer the heading of all the classes for like long time
the heading into classes is zen meditation and then there's a subtitle and i often they asked me for a you they asked me for some title for every class and so i gave us some title but oftentimes right after i write the some labs that or yeah zen meditation and then the fuck is that the
subtitles well as and meditation is so now we have zen meditation buddha activity zen meditation is bot activity and again
i mean to make that the most important thing in my life because some people
are telling people that zen meditation is
something other than bot activity
they think it's like i don't know what
practicing concentration
by ino and and not the way a buddha does it but the way as living being does it like project concentration has i didn't include the whole universe
so i would like to make the point that
zen meditate that zen meditation were trying to learn and practice is is the way and buddha is practicing
can get that can pull up that donna flagg
the practice we're doing is
this border practice buddha activity
and by the way that's what everybody is involved in all the time even though they never heard about it
cause what what is boot activity what is intimacy what is because as an what is parts enlightenment it is
the same practice
hello all beings and the same enlightenment about bags that's what
well that's what that's what's happening is what's happening is not just each individual persons practice got we which we've got so got all the individual practices
can we also have
the practice that they're all doing which is the same practice and we have all the individual enlightenment or lack of enlightenment but all those individual enlightenment and lack of enlightenment or delusions all of them are the same enlightenment does not another enlightenment besides all of our
enlightenment and all of our practices
there's one enlightenment which includes all of our enlightenment
all beings are intimate

i work and we have the opportunity to realize that and the way we realize it is by practicing it
and we are practicing it and we are realizing it but at the same time we don't realize it because we don't practice
but so that that's the border activity
it's the way we do include each other
and the way we are included in each other that way that we are
is buddha activity

whether you went to bed
i'm sorry i'm really sorry and you can tell her i said so
i'm sorry that linda podolski is not here today because linda badass key
asked me if i would talk about that
the vow that we chatted earlier
hootsuite gum on means arousing about
choose me it means it means
our hotel gum on his verse
on arousing the vow
ho tzu is arousing gone as vow and moan as verse
it's a verse for arousing vow the vow of
guess what
the intimacy or the vow of practice enlightenment
so she's a good you can we can you can we have some teaching about that and i said yeah and then this morning another person asked for teachings and discussion of
that burton that with that verse which were just chairman
i'm sorry that does not here because she's gonna miss it here and is is coming i'm already started just not discuss it teaches an artist i'm discussing it
we're discussing it
ah asked
so and also i'm good i intended i was intending to discuss it
two days ago
at green gulch
and i mentioned i i disgusted to the extent that i mentioned that i wanted to discuss it give him me saying that i said i was intended to discuss a hey kosovo to come on tonight but people are saying things to me which make me feel i have to say more
more about one
buddha activity
intimacy i have just say morbid zaza and intimacy bot activity i can't i gotta say more about it before we start talking about a hey kosovo to come on
i thought i felt and that's what happened so then i we talked more about it
and i didn't feel bad about it about the my plan to discuss it was postponed it's okay with me
i don't mind talking about bot activity
and i did
and so and next thursday i intend to talk about it again and or know if i will but if i do i might mention that this chant
arises in the context or buddha activity
so it's good to hear teachers of a buddha activity before you read this chair
and so and you have certain that's good
this chance about
ah how
your practice
the shortcomings and year of practice include all bags
and how your practice
is included in all beings
this this this this chat which were
discussing now it's about how the practice of all beatings
pervades you and how year practice pervades all bags
and that way
the mutual provision
pervading mutually pervading and being pervaded that activity is border activity and that sort of what this a core so what's a gun laws about is the vow to realize that both activity to realize that intimacy
and it also deals with
excuse the expression the vicissitudes of that effort the practice practice enlightenment does not exclude vicissitude
does not exclude vexation affliction confusion fear disgust laziness distraction in other words
excuse the expression
get ready to not be surprised it includes everything
it includes the entire universe it's not like a just includes the good part of the universe it includes the whole thing and i'm not going to say
give all the words for the part of the universe that's not called the good universe
it includes everything and includes all beings what what includes it
the vow includes it and and buddha activity includes all beings
includes all beings have your own experience and all so-called other beings were all intimate
with everything
it includes a homeworks yes
the whole works include the whole works
yeah so and also if any of you want to come to gringo to next thursday
for the for the dharma event when we might discuss this text you're welcome to come
two gringos and in at seven thirty will have a discussion of this text
and someone might think quick someone in this group now might think we can we discuss it now and the answer is we are discussing it
can we continue yes we can may we yes we may and also if you want to come to green gulch
if you're in the neighborhood or if you want to come into the neighborhood and the dark but it would be so dark next week
because of that thing which some called daylight savings time
there won't be so dark you can come in the light but
zen practice is not just coming in the light
it's also coming in the dark
some people come to san for the light fine
but zen is not just coming in the light hits coming in the dark and it's also
not getting caught my the distinction between light and dark
but you already knew that right
we don't just have light
the light of buddha's wisdom is a light which includes light and darkness

as i said there's lots of possibilities
there's even a possibility of a light that doesn't include darkness
that's another kind of like it's a light that doesn't include dark is called the light on delusion
i light that doesn't include dark isn't is a delusion light
and also the dark which doesn't include light is a delusion darkness but there's also an enlightenment light which includes everything

not to go through this text which isn't very long
could potentially take the hands
and actually
it probably will
but as you may have noticed
but your or not
you may have noticed or not that he come in little tiny parsons of moments
when it comes like in minutes and hours and days
and weeks little tiny sections and even flashes of seconds
so in the aeon a discussion of this teaching
we have this little bit of discussion so far and look at how more
the who here does not know who a hey kosovo is raise your hands
a hey corso is also called dogan a hey dough again coastal means and and you know chinese if you talk to as soto zen japanese soldiers and person they've got a lot of feelings and what the word kosovo and you know but
for a foreigner like me a non native chinese speaker call was a character for high or lofty
and so is a character for ancestor so it's the high and lofty ancestor hey hey dog and he wrote this pool
and then he and also the original when he actually wrote ah i think one of the first places it appears is in a text called
the sound of the valley streams and color of the mountains
so in that text his he start he and he starts to or he says he says his mouth
and then the bow is extracted from the text and put together as a as a stand alone or not even stand alone as a as another manifestation of this presentation
which in the original says i wow
with all beings
and so i changed it for this chat i changed it to revile
but when original his i vow with all beijing's from this life on throughout countless lives that's how it starts
all right so some somebody says can we discuss that were line by line for here that there's a line we can discuss high wow
an area where let's was disgusted i love the questions about i eyebrow
hey means a turret well hey hey i don't want any means but it's translated into english as the eternal peace now you can ask
where does eternal peace mean
i didn't ask you but he said you could ask when you didn't huge answered the question
wait a second we just had eternal peace there were just a sec
yeah have the beginning of it is a hey actually begin that's the
i know but then pretend she said i know potentially went back to the previous line which was a eternal peace okay we gotta turn base which is i didn't i didn't mean for her to answer but she answered correctly eternal peace is intimates
are you interested in that
okay we have this person we have this we have this person here she is and and were intimate with her and she does not want to talk about
do i do it these tours and she was she all she wants to do is talk about i my and were and she's close
and where it
the your question and when second one is i was he let's do it let's do it
can we start i is doing games or her just like use can first of festival once the i yes cake before we move on let's just deal with that okay what's the you want to deal with you want to go deep red deep into deep into the first word i forget about
the eternal peace we just want to study the i i ii iii let's go deep all right okay
how deep was that
you know that if your you don't know you know by enchanting a group called the bgs yes i've heard of him they are song how deep does it go how deep how deep have we gone into what is this all as let's go
wait a second i'm i asked you
i asked if that's okay but how deep through how deep how deep is not deep enough
then the bg said how deep does your love go has to go deep enough that i will not have calmed less lives it has to go so deep that there's no countless lives
you know one like this is this is
guess what home yes guess i guess i don't want to guess i want to know yes i order you to guess that's an order i don't get out and do i don't very often give orders but in this case i'm ordering you to guess i guess what lies
i already guessed by but now i'm asking you to guess what i guess i don't know what i'm gasping
yeah so i'm saying guess make a guess
make a guess or woody's and i know anyway you said the something about than the deep i is i where there's not going to be accomplished lives didn't just didn't you say that okay was once again homeless as the day by is the eye or there's
not concept lives as a homeless city and i have the real i by the waves a real i like the day by yes so for homer the d by
it has to be so deep that a drill yes and there deep real i doesn't have countless lives and then i say it a home guess what what
okay what
so if she said to hurt her answer to guess what is one k patrick guess what
huh i i i am the world the world i am i am or another one
not all words know
these are all just wait a second you didn't you didn't guess you missed your chance
so the guess it and i asked her to guess she didn't want to guess she just i want that's fine it's a perfectly good guess what and as and that's what i was gonna ask her to gases is that i agreed with her i agree that that the deep hi
doesn't have countless lives
the thrill i doesn't have countless lives i agree with that but she missed at that answer i gave her a chance to like to see that i agreed with what she thought she just said what
now the profound i also includes what
and the profound i includes includes countless lives
however it doesn't have countless lives
just like the you sow confusion confusion confusion or that's not that's not on the list here we're talking about i know i was listening and then by listening i got lost
oh i were talking about i the first word i and
you know somehow some are you got into depth and the depth you've got into i agree with that the i does not have countless lives it also doesn't even have one life don't have anything
also the i
that does have things
what about that i that i that has things well there's no such i i don't have things now eyes do live in the neighborhood where there is the idea of having things
and that neighborhood is called
i consciousness but that's that's a little difficult when you say that because people might think it's spelled e y i because as a ey i consciousness but self consciousness is where the i lives and in self consciousness which is also called
smother names like what
no has called ego consciousness is called
karmic consciousness
so the place the neighborhood
where the i lives
is called ego consciousness self-consciousness deluded consciousness deceptive consciousness
no no my consciousness know
you could say conventionally yeah anyway where the i lives there's the idea of having something and there's also the idea that the i has something like high has a life
the i as a baby the i has a practice there's an idea this idea to eat but how did this idea came into why did have a wide how did how and kind of consciousness come into being
can have that question to yes yes and and yeah so now you're and that would be getting into the theories of the evolution of consciousness
and i think that that would be good to postpone that discussion because we're now studying the situation to get him to its evolution i think would distract us from going
deep dive makes you say something to says
i'm just a second
i i wonder is it okay if jackie said something to you i think so okay so being any rain in iranian
we have some iranian people here i see a modern here the rain here dna karmic
the and became three i really mean it on where you're from where you were born doesn't matter i don't think this i don't think we're okay i think that's enough of that stuff can you guys can do get on later
so we have
the first word in the original his i and the high is not pigs really existence and has not really non-existent but in if you don't have a sense of i if there's not this phenomena called i
i in mind we don't have consciousness we do have consciousness so we had the sense of i and one of the close close with the things that because closely associate with i is the idea of owning other things that are going on and consciousness and that the i
i always thanks
that's a part of the deal
thank you because that's why then
probably not
we can say i vow
and we we can have the the thought i and the bow and we can have the fog
the i does the vow but that's three things i vow and
does the vow i does the wow
whereas actually and then put them together into a sentence which is the one that can be defined as delusion
that has been defined as delusion the thought i do the vow i have the vow i practiced wow so that's a that's a little delusion in the consciousness
they don't have to read it that way you can read i vow
say am i and in the neighborhood of i am allow they don't have to say i do it a vow but you might think when you when you say i've already you that you might think oh i i do the vow rather than i i lives or their as wow
am looking at that relationship
where there's i vow and then
the idea that the i does of are looking at that
i would think would promote realization of intimacy
another way you can see i have our intimate but an intimacy
it isn't that this site does that side and that side doesn't do this sign that's not intimate
right so the deep
anyway the the intimacy of the situation as i vow and they don't really do each other but the vow includes the i and i includes a all but the i doesn't have the vow in the vow doesn't have the i
they live together in this particular sought for ancestor in him there is an eye he doesn't have not been eliminated and there's a vow they lived together intimately
just like some other things lived together intimacy
like practice and realization it isn't it the practice owns the realization or that the realization hose the practice they arise together all the time and self arises together with the vow if
there's a wow
and vows arise together with a self if there's a self
and vows do not only arise and
comrade consciousness that was arise where there is a yourself to
but then there's then there's intimacy with miles and yourself
that's also possible lot of possibilities pretty much
unlimited possibilities
but to open to and realized the limitlessness we have to deal with the limited and the karmic consciousness the self consciousness ears
limitation land
the i is a limitation and a vow is a limitation and their intimate with each other and that intimacy is unlimited
with the title
for a rousing the wow
it's the you could say that verse for arouse the a you can just pay verse arousing the vow so
it's it's a bot for the sake of arousing it but also it is it is or doesn't want you this rotten this verse is a route is arousing about arousing about is this verse
isn't there some
no then know i think that the vow to the the diverse to arouse the vowel sounds a little bit like there is a vow sometimes and not other times but the the verse which is the arousing is no other time the verse is the arousing
and arousing as diverse the none of their time it's right it's right now
in other words is not in ah
countless lives
hope and as am right now
so here we are here we are dealing with
i e yes justin you ask
can you say that you're being acted upon by the bill
if you could say you could say that than that at the time of saying i vow that that you the person who says i because you're not just the you're not just a word i hear a person who says i
who has a sense of i so you are being acted upon by the vow plus also the i the word i and the i in your mind to all acted upon by the vow and also you and your i are acting upon them out
it's it's intimacy intimacy takes the form of i vow and also intimacy takes the form of
i don't fall
and intimacy takes the form of thanks for coming to this dark dark
and thanks for coming to this down and talk is practice
at this time
we lack a faith what i understood you when you were speaking was that and no nor we lack faith when you were speaking what i understood from faith which i didn't understand the way
word faith before but he was more like nor nor you lack of attention so you are you are
can i say something i i kind of feel like you said you wanted to go through line by line and but you're jumping around now so
you know be careful please that because you said you wanted to
but it's it is it is so that ah you forgot to mention that when you hear that your dharma you will not lack in faith when you see the dharma you will believe the dharma
before you see it you may have some struggles
with you know before use before you see intimacy before intimacy is realized you may have sometimes some doubt about it
my don't just don't we sometimes have no doubt about intimacy in some situations
i think i mean i know yeah i guess i
i find myself resisting this person and that resistance to this person
yeah i guess i feel like my real the realization of intimacy could be deeper i don't i feel some lack of faith and intimacy with this person i feel some lack of readiness to give my life to this person
i guess i don't really believe in intimacy
i'm a i don't feel like i'm believe it as deeply as i might possibly believe in it
i'm a little bit
my realization of intimacy i see some some work to be done here and i also hear understand the teaching saying that at the moment your feel that there's a lack
in your faith the intimacy is there
but still it's good to say i feel cold i feel hot i feel a lack of intimacy and i i'm sorry that i feel like a second i'm sorry that i got distracted
from the intimacy at the moment that i felt a lack of intimacy i'm sorry i'm sorry that i got distracted from what is most important to me which is
intimacy which is
the practice realization i got distracted i'm sorry
then have to be distracted but i was a nice say that my distraction really was unreal
the the the practice realization was totally here i was totally with it but i got distracted
to hear that your dharma
i vow with all beings
to here is it true dharma
and then there can be like yes and so i'm there is a bow
to here is it true dharma with all banks
it into all the good things that would that that would happen if that had gifted all the wonderful benefits and blessings that come with hearing the true dharma before i get into that this is my bought this is the vile that i live with
i'd say part of the reason i'm all that is because i've heard that upon hearing it there will be no doubt
or lack of faith
and because of faith
and a lack of doubt i hear that your dharma so they kind of go together the hearing the dharma and
the lack of doubt and presence of faith that coming going together to here we aren't at the faith doubt in relationship with
hearing the dharma
to have to have no doubt in our to hear
to have to have hearing in order to have no doubt
the kind of closely related the hearing in the no doubt
so i vow to hear the true dharma

i vowed to having a lack of faith
and doubt
i bought
so in a way
that's my goal is to hear the dharma
the true down and have a lack of faith
and have no doubt that's my goal and
the dharma his the intimacy of the way am now
no lack of faith and no doubt
the dharma which i vowed to here is that there's no real separation between my present state and the state of hearing the term donna
that is clarity it's not have a request to view that you take a break on making comments
during my talks at this time
get your talking a little bit too much for me
raise your hand if you want to talk us and everybody else is doing okay
answer here we have we're looking at this text i vow
hi loud
to hear the turned on i vowed to hear the true dharma and the dharma which i vowed to here is that how i am now in the present is not there's no real distinction between the way i am now in herring a turd on what i'm outta here says does no
no distinction between hearing it in the way i am now and there's no distinction between my present faith and no lack of faith
david can also i i have doubts and there's no i'm not going to the dharma isn't
the diamond is not being stuck in the distinction between having doubt and no doubt
so i bought to have here is it your dharma and inherited the dogma i won't have doubt which means i won't be caught in the distinction between doubt and and no doubt
the to
down down feels like it sir
two zero
it seems that way to you and i i have this thought that the dharma is the lot is the lack of a link
because a link builds up at their separate

is it like i'm here is i vow not to turn away
i vow to not turn away
these dangerous doubt no doubt
i vowed to not turn away for the present

i vow i vowed to not turn away from intimacy
no i know have to check which is why vowed to turn away but also i i vowed to turn away from intimacy is also intimacy
who but realizing it
realizing it is realizing intimacy
but on
and their intimate before you before you realize it
the already intimate
so the intimacy and and as realizing it so the vow is to realize it
the dharma is
is the way things actually are namely
our present state and that which we aspire to doesn't know a place to get stuck there between the two but we somehow magically think we are stuck between the two
accepting that is compatible with realize him not being stuck in that

so this is the first couple words of this sub
this text
this series of that that
these ideas hours of congress who
i'm out of a conference
the thrill thrilling we get turned off
to the summer
you're having trouble getting to the center
still that everything all of these and
you're having trouble getting there
i think that part of the reason we're having trouble getting to her as yet you're not understanding that your aren't there
so if you'd probably like it might be helpful to just forget about getting there and here's a teaching that that's where you are
and from the from the teaching that that's where your are see if you can remember that when things started spinning

you're thinking about doubt
could you speak up please


am i saying that that the way i would say a way to practice with doubt is to open to the doubt
to be to be compassionate to the doubt
how that would be
basically i wouldn't i weren't like has a standard as as a well established practice when there's doubt open to it
opening to the doubt
from might be very helpful in realizing intimacy
well in a way i sometimes think while if i really believed him something i would never forget it
so in some sense ah when we forget what what which will never forget what's most important in a way that's kind of like doubt like if you really thought it was an important you'll never forget it so unaware yeah it's possible that that you have a faith that was so strong
that you'd never forget
put another way to put it is that the faith is not forgetting
that when you're not forgetting that is the faith and doubt is is not really for getting the faith doubt is doubt
and that they lived together that the doubt and the faith our internet
and when you have faith you don't have doubt except that it's right there so your faith includes doubt and not just doubt but in a wide variety of doubts your face may be kind of like basically when one thing
which has several names so well maybe the doubt is actually just one thing to which are several names so the faith includes a doubt the doubt includes the faith they lived together in intimacy
and we switched from faith to doubt
and then there's a pract and then we sometimes
remember that we trust the practice of opening
both and faith and endowed and and for a number opening to doubt we just we've just exercised our faith
and you could say when we
don't open to faith or we don't open to doubt we'd just exercise doubt
so doubt basically exercises close down what time to close down life
okay time to close down this relationship
okay time to call the conversation off okay time to forget about intimacy
in other words i doubt intimacies really that goal so we're not we're not going to have intimacy now we're going to have control role
i tried to be intimate with these people but they just didn't behave very well so then i switched back to not intimacy and i'm gonna get him to behave well
that means i don't intimacy
i think i doubted intimacy i went for controlling these people into being good
i forsook
for the sake of getting them to be on the right track
i doubted intimacy
and now i see that and i'm sorry and and i'm gonna go back and give intimacy another chance i do believe in intimacy
i don't believe an opening to my life not closing it down but i got scared and
oh and i've forgotten
the open to the fear
i forgot when i got frayed i forgot intimacy and switched to non intimacy which of course i know is an illusion but i did spall into that pit and switch from being with this suffering too kind of making the suffering go
way or reducing at or whatever something other than intimacy
and i know a lot of parents of teenagers who are struggling with this
the got these teenage children who are doing cora are doing things and there's a omnipresent danger of them hurting themselves or others
a simple example can i would be like got a teenager and they've got homework and it is somewhat important that they do their homework or that they learn you know how to do ah a term paper it's important
but i say for me my faith is an intimacy
and a poop if we realize intimacy with this person who's working on the term paper
that's what's important
an intimacy is not to control them into writing the paper as not the right of the read the paper for them but
to be there with them
and don't do anything other than be intimate with them
cause the intimacy is what's going to help them after they do it or not finish their homework
intimacies what they're having a problem with
and that's what you can teach them
but you have to be with them while they're doing this stuff to show them that you value intimacy with them
most hand you're there to support them while they do various things which are important
but all those things are temporary
and they would don't know all those things will be gone in a few minister of your days are a few weeks and they'll be moved on to other things but the intimacy will will be there in every case and that's what somebody needs to teach them and if they learn that then as you say
crawl through all these activities they'll be fine if they learned intimacy and if they don't even if these things on the list that they're involved in are fairly nice
what's a tragedy if they don't learn intimacy
even if they're you know are healthy and
good looking happy and
they don't learn intimacy their deep down
missing their life
and but on the other hand if they're flunking on a school
are taking drugs
and your there are teaching them intimacy you're teaching him what's important and they may have to go through all this
the stuff
they may have to go through all this stuff to learn intimacy
an intimacy is not saying you're not supposed to go through this stuff
you're not supposed to go through this stuff is the stuff you're supposed to go through done that kind of talk is part of what gender go through
so on
for your you are supposed to go through this stuff is also part of what just what you're going through
no you i'm talking to you now and i'm saying you have to go through this stuff
that covering that talk is is temporary i'm not going to keep saying that for countless lives
but right now i'm saying
and if you
if you listen to me or not that's also temper
and after you're done listening to me
if you learned intimacy you'll be fine after you don't listen to me you learned to save fine
after you do it i asked you to do or don't do it i ask you to
if you learn intimacy you're fine
if you get good grades
and you learn intimacy and you're fine if you flunk out and you'll learn intimacy you're fine
zan is not about getting good grades and it's not about flunking out
it's about being intimate with whatever
which includes in order to realize intimacy some people have to flunk out
and also
in order to religion may see some people have to get good grades
different different people have to do go through different stuff to realize what's important it's not what they got through
if the realization of i
and harry the true dharma
it's that
and yeah
and this is very subtle and very simple
for me because premier the most important thing is to here is a true dharma wherein there's no
lack of faith
there's no lack of faith and there's no doubt
which means to me
there's no faith

when there's no faith without doubt there's no lack of faith and there's no doubt
because there's no doubt aside from faith that's the kind of no doubt the risk

and if i forget
that's what this text is about
which will maybe member goalkeeper the taxes about when i forget the faith
when i forget that practicing
intimacy and realizing intimacy or the same thing
the interest is already there i'm intimate with my children i'm intimate with my friends i'm intimate with my enemies intimacies already there

but if i don't practice it what's already here i don't realize it
but if i do practice it
that is the realization good it's hard to hear
and the practices are to here to cause thirty
does not realization before the practice or practice before the realization
that's intimacy

i had this dream just how that you all understand me perfectly