a Samadhi song, a song about stillness. And in that song, part of the song, it says, it says, communing with the universe, travel the pathways. Let me assess that. Communing with the source, travel the pathways. Embrace the story, treasure the road. So in samadhi, in stillness, part of it is like communing with all

[01:01]

in the stillness. Communing with the way we are living together, the way we are helping each other to be in peace and harmony. Communing, that's the source of the practice, is the way we're working. The way the perfectly enlightened beings are working together with the beings who are less developed. and the way all the less developed beings are actually working together, helping each other become free and live in peace. So in our stillness we commune with that source. And also we travel a pathway. We walk a path in our stillness. We commune with it and we walk the path of it.

[02:03]

Then it says, embrace the territory. Embrace the territory of stillness and treasure the road by which it unfolds and develops. We embrace the stillness and we don't have to move to embrace it. That's part of the practice, is just to be still with the reality of our life. But another part is to take care of the process of development, which seems to be also there. So in the song we sang, the song didn't say that communing with the source was better than traveling the pathway. It says we do in the samadhi. Stillness both communes intimately with reality and it walks forward in daily life.

[03:11]

Sharing the source of stillness with all beings. And then it also says later in the song, it says, now there are sudden and gradual... So in Buddhist teaching, there's some talk of sudden enlightenment and gradual enlightenment. And this text says there's sudden and gradual. Song is not favoring sudden over gradual. It's recognizing both, that there are these different approaches, a kind of sudden approach and a gradual approach. Once basic approaches... excuse me, now they are sudden and gradual in connection with teachings and approaches arise. Once the approaches are distinguished, then there are guiding rules. But even though the basis or the sources reach and the path is apprehended, true eternity still flows.

[04:17]

So those of you who were in the last class, you can refer back to your song. And those of you who weren't, I can bring you some copies of the text next time if you want to see the text that we studied last time, the song. The 10 oxherting pictures are, in a sense, a picture of stages. They're pictures of a path. So the 10 Oxfordian pictures kind of are an example of a gradual approach, gradual realization of enlightenment. But I'm sort of warning at the beginning, although we're going to be studying a gradual path, I pray that we do not forget stillness.

[05:28]

That we do not forget stillness when we talk about this path of development that we'll be discussing. I... I think I have thought, and many Zen students think that you make stillness, that you get stillness, that you do something to get stillness, to make yourself still. But I'm kind of offering a somewhat different perspective. That's silence, I mean stillness and silence. The Chinese character for stillness that is often used, it means stillness and silence. Like the German word stillen. Stillness and silence. The stillness is already here. It's not someplace else. We're living in it.

[06:30]

Enlightenment is living in stillness and we're living there too. We live in the same place as enlightenment. We have as perfect enlightenment. And we are there, or we are here. And we are still. However, if we don't remember stillness, then we forget it. And if we forget it, things don't go the path of enlightenment. Enlightenment is all around us, and yet, we need to remember it and receive it. offered to us. Did I say enlightenment is all around us? Did I? Stillness is all around us. Enlightenment is all around us. It's never not.

[07:32]

It always is being offered to us by reality. It's our helper. It's offering itself to us by giving us this samadhi, giving us this stillness. Our job is to remember that it's being offered and to receive it. And we don't have to go someplace else to receive it because it's being offered here to us now. If we go someplace else, we will miss the offering. Now, if you go someplace else and then when you get there, then you stop going someplace else, then you can get it. But the problem is that when you get there, you might also go someplace else. We might as well start right now remembering stillness and remembering to receive this gift.

[08:34]

And then, although we may not know that we received it, we're being told that we have received it But if we don't practice receiving it, we won't understand that we've received it. The people who have become really good at understanding that they've received this samadhi are the people practicing receiving it. And then we don't just receive it, we practice it. And then we don't keep it, we give it away. That's a kind of background to reiterate and I hope you also take care of this. This, as it says in the song we studied last time, do you remember how it starts? The teaching of suchness, intimately transmitted, Buddhas and ancestors, now you have it.

[09:39]

The teaching of suchness, living in stillness, is intimately transmitted, and it has been transmitted to you, you do have it now, so please take care of it, and you take care of it by remembering that it has been given to you. And when you remember that it's been given to you, then receive it and practice it. And whatever comes to you all day long, try to remember it and practice it. It's not even exactly like be still. You already are. You don't have to like be still. You have to receive that you are being still. Okay? So this kind of teaching sounds in some sense sudden because it's not later. Stillness is not like something that You know, later you're going to be still.

[10:42]

The samadhi is already here. It's faster than sudden. It doesn't even take any time. It's immediate. Immediate. So there's that sudden, immediate practice. All you have to do is have faith in it and remember it. Or have faith that you should remember it and remember that you should have faith and you've got it. And remembering it is part of taking care of it. Receiving what you've already got Receiving your job is part of doing the job. And practicing it, of course, is part of doing the job. And then, this isn't just for you, it's for everybody, so give it to everybody. Everybody you meet, now here you are, be generous and give it to them.

[11:44]

offer them this stillness, which isn't exactly my stillness. It's the stillness of how we really are. Okay? So now, I pass these pictures of the ten oxherting pictures out to you. I think there's enough. I think you have enough for everybody. Looks like there's not quite 50. And I have 50. So here's some pictures, which are called ox herding pictures.

[13:17]

I want to mention the Chinese character that's translated as ox. When you say ox herding pictures, the Chinese character more basically means cow. And more basically, it means a bovine animal. So it can be cow. herding pictures, the 10 ox herding pictures. An ox is, I think, usually a neutered male bovine in, what do you call it, for service or for plowing. Not all cows are are draft animals. So ox are often draft animals, and they're often castrated males. And then there's bulls. So sometimes they, like here's a little book which says 10 bulls of Zen.

[14:27]

Same character. Bulls, cows, oxen. The series of classes, I think, is it six? It's seven? Good. It's kind of seven classes is, you know, in a way, it's not much opportunity, it's not much time to cover all this. But I think we'll be okay. Okay. To actually devote attention to each one, we'd have to, like, on some nights, do two pictures. And tonight, I would like to just do one. The first one, what's the first one called? Searching for the Ox. That's the first one.

[15:28]

So I'll just tell you right off that the first one is the same as the last one. The first one is the same as the last one. And yet, in the last one, which is really the same as the first one, there's understanding that the last one is the first one. I'm telling you how the tenth one, you understand that the tenth one is the same as the first one. But in the first one, even though I'm telling you, you don't really understand yet how the first one is the same as the tenth one. But it is. And the fact that you're not understanding the same as the tenth one is the tenth one.

[16:42]

The tenth one is understanding that not understanding that the first one is the tenth one is the tenth one. And it's also the first one. So there really isn't stages. And yet... we sometimes have to go through them to understand that there aren't. Well, they're the same, but in a way they're not as much the same as the first one because they kind of look like they're, what do you call it, letting go of some of the problems of the first one? They really are, but the last one you're totally back into the first one. But in the middle, in the middle stages you actually don't understand that you haven't gone anywhere.

[17:51]

In the first stage you have some understanding that you haven't gone anywhere. When you first start, you kind of know, well, I'm just starting. But on the second stage, you might think, well, actually, on the second stage, I've left the first stage behind. You might think that. And then on the fifth stage, you might think, boy, things are really developing nicely here. Much better than the... My relationship with the ox is really much more intimate than it used to be. So it seemed different than when you hadn't even met the ox yet. But in the final path, you're literally back into the same situation. The first picture... Oh, by the way, before I forget...

[18:55]

If it's okay with you, I'm not going to give you paper. I'm giving you this. And one of the things you can do is you can go online and you can type in 10 oxherding pictures. And then I think you will... You'll get some opportunities there. And you can see these 10 pictures online. And what I found was actually colored versions of these pictures. Very nice. These are actually quite pretty pictures. And it looks like it's a boy in the picture. but it could be a girl. Okay, so Wikipedia.

[19:58]

Yeah, 10 bulls or 10 ox herding pictures, Wikipedia, and it has these pictures in color. Okay, and then it has under each picture, it has kind of an introduction or commentary and a on these ten pictures. So if you want to read the poem in the commentary, it's right here. And there's a lot more stuff also on this, but that's one, if you'd like, you can look at that. And I'm happy for you to look at it. bring up questions about it. I do request that you don't ask me to jump way ahead next week, but that if you read later stuff, wait till we get it to bring it up. Otherwise, I think some people will have a hard time following the discussions. Also, I might mention that this set of pictures is this, yeah, this picture, this way of seeing it is the most popular version in Japan and maybe the most popular.

[21:19]

This set of pictures was not painted by a monk, was not painted by the monk Gao An. But Gao An wrote the verses. And then later, and he lived in like in the... And then later somebody drew these pictures. So these pictures were drawn later. He may have drawn the pictures too, but we don't have his pictures. The pictures we have are from the 15th century. These are the ones you have here. And then we also have... in this article, along the side of this article, there's also pictures that were drawn in the 20th century. Along the side. The same principle. And in these pictures, on the side and the main pictures, the ox is pictured without changing color.

[22:27]

It's basically the same ox all the way through. There's other versions of the 10 ox herding pictures where the ox starts black and goes white. It's a different set. I think it might be confusing if we try to deal with that other set at the same time, but we may not be able to avoid it. It really might be interesting to do another class with the set of pictures that start with a black ox and the ox gets white. But in this picture, the ox starts dark and stays dark. So in these pictures, it seems like it's more about intimacy with the ox. The ox doesn't really change. What changes is the intimacy. Between the ox herd or the ox herder and ox herder are similar words.

[23:45]

The ox herd and the ox become more and more intimate through this gradually become more and more intimate. And then when the intimacy is pledged, they both disappear. So again, now looking at the first one, looks like there's a There's a boy standing in nature, right? It looks like there's some water there. Is there some water there? Can you see the water? Maybe there's some water. Anyway, there's mountains and other vegetation, and he's in nature. And I can't see his face very clearly, but... It's kind of like right now in the United States, in the world, the problems we have in the world right now.

[25:03]

That's kind of like the first stage. And right now, there may be some sense that we need to train, we need to be involved in training. There may be some sense that there's a lack of skill, some lack of skill in this world. Skill, for example, remembering stillness. But there's certain situations where we get distracted from the practice. And now I'm talking to you and I think, well, maybe some human beings feel like, yeah, I

[26:12]

I can sort of relate to the distracted from the Buddha mind, distracted from perfect enlightenment. And then the thought arose, well, if we do train, we move through these stages and we become more trained, or we become more trained, or we become more engaged in the training, or is it that the ox becomes more trained? It's not exactly clear whether it's the ox herd that becomes more trained or the ox gets more trained.

[27:16]

Because it looks like the ox herd is training. But is it really so? And then when the ox is well trained and the ox herd and the ox have this intimate relationship, are they both more trained? And then at that time, what about the first stage where there seems to be a need for training? So I'm kind of thinking that maybe we don't have to be back at the first stage again when we're at the more advanced stage. Where it says, training the ox, the ox is now and the ox and the oxherd are trained. The ox has an oxherd who can now ride on the ox.

[28:24]

Before the ox was well trained, the oxherd couldn't ride on the ox. Or was it before the oxherd was well trained, the oxherd couldn't ride on the ox? Well trained horse riders seem to be able to get on almost any horse. But sometimes they have to train the horse. It's not clear who's training who. Is it the Buddha mind that's training us or are we training the Buddha mind? And then once it's going really well, there's some thought in my mind that, well, I'm in a different place than I was at the beginning. Or we, our intimacy is in a different place from where it was at the beginning. And when I have that thought do I remember stillness with that thought?

[29:38]

What's the thought? From this, that I've evolved beyond this. And so I don't have to go back here. Where's the ox? So you want to search for the ox a little bit? That's the first picture. Where's the ox? Well, in the first picture, apparently we don't know where the ox is. We don't see the ox. Should we search for it? And where should we search? Where should we search? Search everywhere?

[31:03]

Yeah, search everywhere. And then the thought arose in my mind just now, search everywhere as here. So searching for the ox, one place to search for the ox would be like where the ox is. And the ox could be any place. As a matter of fact, the ox is every place. Buddha mind is every place. But it might be good to search for what's every place here. Use here as every place. Yes, King?

[32:18]

Would you say that again, please? In order to search for an ox, you have to have some notion... And you could say you might have to have some notion, right? Or feel some lack. Feeling some lack could also be one of the notions you have. You have the notion that you lack the Buddha mind. So you have some notion that this mind is lacking

[33:19]

or this mind is not Buddha mind. There's such a notion. Maybe. And there's a lot more notions we could have besides the one we just came up with just now. There could be many notions about what the ox is. There could be many. And And all of them could be the ox. In this case, all of them could be the ox. Every idea we have of the ox could be the ox. And that makes it harder to see the ox. When it could be anything, and actually, in this case, it is everything. So it's kind of hard to see it. But even though it's hard to see it, we could... given that all these different ideas about what it might be, and this is not it.

[34:21]

This is not it. And yet, because it's everything, and yet we can use this to realize it. Because this is also everything. This is as much everything as the ox is everything. So we can look for the ox as this, or look at this as the ox. Yes, Tracy? Why are we using an animal? Why are we using something tangible? I'm not sure why, you know, we can make up stories about why cows have been worshipped in India and China for a long time, about why they chose cows.

[35:39]

It could be a shirt. It could be a shirt. It could be... It could be a shirt. That would be fine. And again... Oh, because this is a class on the 10 oxygen pictures. We could have another class on a shirt. or on a robe. Can you? Yes, you can. Yes. In the original poem, is there a statement as to why he assumes the big function of the arts?

[36:54]

In the original poem? In the original poem, it's kind of like it says he's basically lost. The original poem, he seems to be distressed and in despair and lost in the forest, in the jungle. And he doesn't know where to go. and he's in swollen rivers flowing around him, kind of a turbulent, desperate feeling. And then the final line of the poem is something like, and yet all he can hear is the sound of the chitadas, singing in the night, in the forest night. So part of the poem is that he's desperate.

[38:01]

He can still hear somebody singing. Nature is singing to him, even though he doesn't really hear nature's song yet. Nature is actually singing this to him, but he feels lost. And then the explanation is the reason why he's lost is because he's strayed away from himself. So the situation in the beginning is somebody has strayed away She's strayed away from her innermost stillness. And she's desperate. Yes? And certainly they have a sense of lacking or desire.

[39:16]

Yeah. I think so. They've lost. Maybe don't feel like they lost. They might feel that they've lost peace. They've lost peace of mind. They've lost a sense of knowing where they are. So they're lost and they want to find peace. their home, they've lost their home, they've lost their way, and they don't even know what direction to look. And of course we know which direction to look everywhere, everything. But he doesn't yet know that. He's looking for his home. He's looking for his mind, his true mind. He doesn't know at the beginning he's looking for a cow. Maybe he does. Maybe he's a professional cowherd and he's lost his cow. Maybe you're a professional Buddha and you've lost your Buddha.

[40:19]

And you're yearning for your Buddha. And you don't know where to look or who you should be hanging out with. So you thought, well, maybe the yoga room class is a good place to go. So here you are. But there's no particular who is the most Buddha-like person in the room or where the Buddha is in the first stage. Everywhere is equally unengaging. I think there is yearning for peace. And there's a sense that our true home is a place of peace. There's something about... We are living in peace, and we would like to realize it. That's where we are, and yet we strayed away from where we are, and we kind of yearn to be home again.

[41:23]

But we have no clue of what direction to go. And again, I would say, keep the door open on not knowing where to go. Don't say, okay, you know, because the next stage he sees, the next stage he sees some path. When you start to see some, you know, everywhere, everywhere, right? But right now you don't see it's everywhere. It's true that it's everywhere, but he doesn't see it. He's despairing because it's everywhere. narrow down a little bit later, so that he won't be so despairing. It's going to be not everything, it's going to be a particular path that's going to give him a way to engage. But we're at the first stage, which is the last stage, so we know that the place to look for the ox, the place to look for it, is everywhere, which includes here. So it's not exactly that we should look here, it's just that we should look everywhere,

[42:30]

And the place of everywhere that we have to start with is this here. But he doesn't know that he's there. But we should not leave that boy behind. We should remember him. We should not forget that in some ways he's just like the end of the process where everywhere... And the nature is singing everywhere. And here. And it says that he's hearing the song, but he doesn't hear it. Somebody's singing. He doesn't get it. Yes and yes? Just wanted to say... literal translation for me is it's a boy in the woods with an ox, and he's in protection. He's comfort. He's this boy's companion, and the ox has wandered off, and now the boy is all alone.

[43:34]

There's fear. Yeah. And dread. Yeah. Pull this from the relationship with the ox. He's right. Yeah, right. And you said dread in the forest. And there's one of the Buddhist scriptures is called fear and dread. And the Buddha was someplace and a Brahmin male came to him and said, are you like the leader of this group? Are you like the role model for this group of yogis? And Buddha said, mm-hmm.

[44:36]

So do they sort of like follow your practice? And do you go into the forest and where there's lots of dangers. And he said, mm-hmm. He said, but then they'll follow you and won't that be like dreadful and frightening? And he said, well, when I first went into the forest, I felt dread and fear. But then, when I felt, for example, if I was walking and I felt fear and dread, I would just keep walking until it subsided. In other words, I would say, if I was walking and fear and dread came up, I would just remember stillness.

[45:38]

And if I was sitting... I would just remember stillness. I would just keep sitting. And if I was standing, I would just remember stillness. In other words, I would stand. And if I was reclining, same. And then when I remember that, the fear and dread would... So in your example, we're out in the forest with all these dangerous... possibilities and we're afraid because we've forgotten stillness we've forgotten the Buddha and we'd like to know where to look but at the beginning you're somewhat you're quite enlightened because you realize there's no way to there's no place to look the Buddha didn't look around for the Buddha the Buddha just sat still and this was the direction he would face.

[46:42]

So it wasn't like it's over there, just that this is where he is. It's not like it's over there, it's just that this is where he is. It's not that it's over here, this is the way it is. So as you know in Zen, we do this one. We just look at the wall. We don't need a good view. All views are are of everything. So, but until we, and at the beginning, he doesn't get it, so he's afraid. And he kind of would like to have, what's the path home, or what's the path to his protector? What's the path to Buddha? So again, I'm saying, it's not that there's no path, it's that everything is the path. And if that's too much at the beginning of the path, okay, Let's use this one. So the next stage will be, we're going to, everything is the path, but we're going to find some particular thing to be the path.

[47:49]

And again, at the end, we'll realize that was a particular way, but all the other ways which we didn't take would have been in accord with what we found. What is your name? Huh? Sharon, did you want to bring something up? I was just going to say, reflecting on my own life, there was no worries of tearing me up.

[49:05]

I searched your path, but I don't want to look back anymore. That's where I began. From the deep sense of lostness, I went back, reaching out there, and I struggled. I saw the truth. I didn't look back. I wanted to search. But ultimately, there was no search. I couldn't search anymore. coming to a path where there's no walking, was a gift of unfolding from the dead. This is what and this is why. Now that we're experiencing something, Yes. Yes. Yes.

[50:48]

When you're lost. And then another phrase is, when you're lost, every step you take is your way home. And different people take different steps, so they have different ways home. And one step you could take is to stay where they are, that's their way home. Yes?

[52:19]

For me, the poem that you described of despair, this void of feeling, that, or that sense of losing one's mind, that, rather than searching, takes this message, the idea of being so much despair, to the beginning of the path makes sense to me. You know, it's like you can't live without this arrow. You're losing your mind. And at another level, you have to lose your mind to, you know, in that sense of losing your mind. But what you're trying to say is losing your mind to Well, so we have despair, loss, fear, longing, all that.

[53:24]

Well, by the way, in the story of the Buddha, he said, but now when I go in the forest, it's like, I'm very happy to be there. I love being in the forest. And this person, you might think that since I still go in the forest, that I'm attached to being in the forest. to the practice of going into the forest. But I'm not attached to it. I keep going into the forest for two reasons. One is I like to, and the other is to show people the path. So this first picture is going into the forest. And when we go into the forest, loss Confused, afraid, longing, despair, all that.

[54:49]

We don't have to feel it all right now, but I think the beginning is we should go someplace where we feel it and where we might feel more of it or all of it. So the first picture is about are we okay with it? being in that first picture. Okay? Are we willing to go to the first picture and open to that stuff? And when I think of you, some of you who I know quite well, excuse me for saying so, I kind of think that you're, in a way, in some of the later pictures. That you've already started And actually some of you are quite well trained or you have kind of intimacy with the Buddha mind. So you're really more kind of like maybe in picture number six or maybe even seven.

[55:54]

And I won't say if I think anybody's in ten. Are all in ten. But that's one. But in a way, I kind of feel like maybe we're not in 10 yet because I think we're still a little bit queasy about one. And I think tonight there's a pretty tangible sense of being in number one. And there's some discomfort and fear and longing and distress and despair about number one. And because we haven't fully got to number 10, I think there's a little bit of resistance in this room. And I'm not blaming anybody. And I'm not pointing the finger at one person more than another. But maybe I'm the only one that feels a little bit of resistance to the first picture.

[56:55]

And I dream that many other people have some resistance to the first one. Do anybody else have any resistance to the first one? One person does. Yes? Do you have any resistance to the first one? To the first picture? Oh, I didn't think so. Yes? You have attachment? On the move, yeah. Oh, being on the bull. Playing your flute on the bull, yeah. That's a really nice situation. It's a very horrible situation.

[57:57]

To be on the... No, to have attachment. Yeah, it is horrible. And so my question is, did you hear her horror story? She has attachment to being in the sixth picture. The sixth picture is like, hey, we're intimate with the bull now. We can ride the bull and play a flute while you're riding it. This is... she has an attachment to. She just told us that. And she says it's terrible to have that attachment. Yeah. Having an attachment to the sixth stage is well established in the first stage. Is that clear? First stage, it's quite, you know, basically in the first stage you have attachment to all the later stages. And in the first stage, attachment to all the later stages, not just the next one, the next one will be some improvement.

[58:58]

There's some attachment to the next one, and then the better ones are the more intimate ones we even have maybe more attachment to. And Elena has kindly told us that she, unlike the rest of you, is really yearning for and attached to the bliss of number six. Some other people might have or seven or whatever. She's saying number six is her favorite and she is attached to her favorite. And now she's telling us something more. She's telling us that it's terrible to be attached to number six. Thank you. And I'm saying it's number one is where you have the to number six and number seven and actually number two. So love is wonderful. And I'm saying, is there some resistance in being in this terrible situation of wanting some improvement? That's also part of number one.

[60:03]

And she said, what does one do? And number one, I'm sorry, number one, I'm not going to tell you what to do. Number one, nobody's even telling you what to do with number one. And if they tell you, you say, well, you're just kidding. I told you I'm not going to tell you. He said, you must be joking. Number one, really, like I say, it's like the last one. You would like to be somewhere else, and it's terrible that you can't be, but you can't be somewhere else. You're in the pits. You're afraid. You've made no progress. You're wasting your time. It's, you know, you're whatever. You're a stupid idiot for being here. You have better things to do. I'm going to go someplace where somebody would tell me where I, you know. And then the question is, right off the bat, start and try to stop, to give up resistance to this terrible situation. And so we can just work on that for a week.

[61:14]

Did two people over there have their arms raised? Yeah? So, was it Bill Williams? Is that the guy who started it? He got the idea of AA from these pictures. Yeah. But he didn't give credit to the pictures. Which is fine, it's fine, fine. But that beginning step of AA is like... And again, a lot of people don't want to be in the first picture, so they drink so they won't be in the first picture. And finally they realize... Huh? What? Yeah. So finally they say, okay, I'm in the first picture...

[62:19]

ready to accept that I'm in the first picture. Because I need to accept I'm in the first picture. And then later I won't be in the first picture, so then I won't have to accept it. But I'm saying beforehand, before we leave the first picture, remember that we're never really going to leave the first picture. We're never going to abandon the people in the first picture. And yet, we're going to consider the second picture. But first of all, can we open to the first picture? In other words, can we remember to be still with the first picture, which is terrible. And there's a variety of terribles. Not everybody's... The sixth picture is Elena's favorite. And not only is it her favorite, but she's attached to it. But not only that, but because she's actually not just in the first phase, she knows she's miserable. But she's still resisting the first phase. Tyler? Well, it could be the Buddha mind.

[63:25]

Or it could also be your mind. But your mind is the Buddha mind, because when you're intimate with your mind, it's the Buddha mind. So it's the Buddha mind, and it's also your... So the Buddha mind goes and says, hey, I'm not trained, train me. The Buddha says, hey, train me. The Buddha walks up to you and says, hey, I'm untrained, train me. That's one of the ways the Buddha appears to us. So we say, okay. But right now, we don't even see the bull. Nobody's even telling us. At the beginning, nobody's even coming and saying, hey, hello, train me. I'm a wild critter. But we're going to see some opportunities for training. But I'm kind of saying, our training, if we're not trying to get away from the first stage. And I think some of us would like to get out of here.

[64:31]

Because it's terrible. In a variety, in a total variety of ways it is terrible. And it's an opportunity. Yes. [...] You could say give up hope, but I think more to the point would be accept it, you know, be still with being in the first stage. Don't forget about the other stages, which again is like sudden practice. You're not trying to move through stages. You're going to just work with the way you are now. Yeah, so that's the first stage.

[65:35]

And the best practice to do, I think, is to totally be still with that. Give up resisting it. Yeah. And again, if you really could do that 100%, you'd be in the 10th stage. In the 10th stage, you can totally accept the first stage. In the 10th stage, you say, hey, first stage, I've been waiting for you. Now I can, finally I can be here without trying to improve anything. But we're going to have to go through all the other stages. But still I'm saying, why don't we just do the 10th stage right away? Why don't we just start off by trying? And maybe what we'll find is... you know, grab your ridiculous for even suggesting that. It's ridiculous that we would actually be able to accept this situation.

[66:38]

This situation. Whatever you mean by that. That we'd be able to be still. It's just ridiculous to think that, not expect, even suggest that we could be still with this terrible situation. But why not? Why not right away And then say, okay, I can't. You said, because I can't. Okay. And can you be still with that? Yeah. Oh, I guess I can be still with it. Yes. Yes. Well... You know, I don't mind if you're going to go to the 10th stage right now.

[67:44]

I don't mind if you're not resisting this world that we're living in. I think that's really where it's at. But isn't there some resistance? And that's what... You have resistance to not having a home. Yeah. And I think a lot of us have resistance to not having a home. not having a home. Elena, the home she wants is number six, and she doesn't have it. Or actually, I won't say she doesn't have it, it's that she's attached to it, and that's stressful.

[68:48]

And maybe you're attached to having another kind of home, you know, which we can understand. Yes? Yes. Yeah, I think we would like to meet the Buddha mind, yes. And we'd like to not just meet it, but receive it and practice it and transmit it. Buddha mind, yes. Yeah. It lives in stillness. And in the stillness is the wonder-working activity of Buddha's wisdom and compassion. because we are beings who want that. That's the kind of beings we are. But beings who want that have to go into the first stage and learn by going through nine, ten stages how to be in the first stage.

[69:57]

It's not like you go through the next nine stages and then you still can't go be in the first stage. It's more like now we're having trouble being in the first stage. So, in a way, it seems like we shouldn't really leave the first stage. We should just consider other stages to help us be in the first stage. Because the tenth stage is being in the first stage with no resistance. So now we're in the first stage and some of us have some resistance to the first stage. And the second and third and so on stages may help us give up our resistance to the first stage. All of that. So in the first stage year You're longing for the ox.

[71:01]

You don't even know what the ox is or you do know what the ox is. Like Elena knows what the ox is and she likes the ox and she likes to ride it and play music. Other people don't even know what the ox is and that's very distressing for them because we're in a class about ox herding pictures and they don't know what the ox is and they would like somebody to tell them what the ox is and then they'd feel better. And between now and when they know what the ox is, they're going to be somewhat distressed, etc. And they have some resistance to being in such a pitiful situation. But this class is about how to be comfortable in a pitiful situation. how to want to go there in order to receive and practice and transmit the Buddha mind for the welfare of all the other people who are having trouble being in a situation where they don't know what's going on or they do know what's going on and they're attached to what's going on and they're suffering because of that.

[72:06]

Well, this is the start. This is the first stage. So let's not resist it and let's not dwell in it. And not dwelling in it, let's not run away from it. Running away from it is dwelling in it. Okay? Running away from it is dwelling in it. Dwell in it. Let's not stay here. Let's not go there. Let's not dwell in it. Let's not resist it. Not resisting and not dwelling are the same. And not dwelling in it is the tenth stage. But it doesn't count to not dwell in it by running away from it. Be in it to not dwell in it. So let's not run away from the first stage. Let's not dwell in the first stage. And let's even be generous and kind to any resistance to being in this first stage.

[73:17]

For the rest of our lives, let's practice that way. Okay? But now we can look at the next stages and see how they help us be in the first stage. How they help us not resist the first stage. Okay? If you excuse me for saying so, I think we have... Thank you very much.

[73:42]

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