There is great joy. Can you hear me up in the heights? There's a great joy that we can recite such a beautiful vow that we just recited. Yeah, that some people have a vow, like Ehe Koso, the ancient teacher, Ehe Koso, Dogen Zenji. That he had a vow like that is so wonderful. And we can... see it and listen to it and remember it. And then we can see if we accept it and if we want to uphold it.

[01:04]

Such a vow. Five days ago we finished a three week at Green Gulch. in that valley with the dragon, the green dragon was there. And at the beginning of the three weeks, I brought up the question of what is most important in this life. Or another way I say it is, what is the ultimate concern of life?

[02:07]

What's the deepest or the highest? And as usual, when I bring that up, some people that they're not clear about that. And then I tell them that that's quite common. Yeah, it happens that people, when they look inward to their heart and mind and body, they are not real clear with the response to that. Keep asking it and encouraging people to ask because there is an answer. And that answer is then, for the time being, what's most important to you. And it's very beneficial to discover that within yourself because your life can be oriented in relationship to it.

[03:24]

Without that, most people, most of the time, are, well, they're very distressed, picking and choosing, trying to figure out what to do. Sometimes not really doing anything other than trying to figure out what to do. And, you know, very distressed about it. Hard for them to go to work on anything because, well, should I do this, this, or this, or this? When you find it important and you, to make a long story short, when you settle into it fully, then everything lines up with it. And there's not really much distress about which of the things that line up. that are in accord with what's most important. It doesn't matter which one you do, because there are infinite number of things that line up with what's most important.

[04:30]

But if you don't know what's most important, then you can be in doubt about choosing which of the infinite things to do. But when you see that they all serve the same point, then you can accept, I'll just do this one today. I'll just do this one right now. I'll take care of this thing right now. And that will be good because that will be in accord with what's most important. And also, I understand when I remember what's most important, unless what's most important is for you to forget what's most important. if you remember what's most important, then to do anything, even tiny thing, that accords with it is wonderful. And you can accept that you cannot do the infinite number of good things that line up with it this morning.

[05:38]

But you can quite likely do one right now if you knew what it was. Because this thing lines everything up and there's infinite opportunities. Also, there's things which do not line up with it. Whatever it is, some things do not. Some things are in conflict with it. And that also is a normal situation. You heard the vow of the ancestor Dogen. That's his vow. But even he probably had some conflicting intention. But he could maybe see quite clearly that's a conflicting intention. I'll just let go of it. It doesn't go with this. And if I can't let go of it, then I have to practice how to deal with that.

[06:42]

That's called lack of faith in practice. So then I go back to that practice, and then I'm realigned again. So I say unto you, again, here's an opportunity today. this morning, this afternoon, this evening, to ask yourself, what is it that's most important? And just keep doing that until you hear it from your heart. And then continue after that until it's a nice, clear a nice clear message from you to your life, from your life to you. And every single day, every day refresh the question and rediscover what it is.

[07:48]

Because every day you need to line up again with it. Otherwise you drift off into the picking and choosing. Now, if it, and then also, if it becomes clear, then you can consider, do you aspire to realize? It's the next step. Is there an aspiration to realize it? I suppose it's possible to say, well, this is most important, but I don't know if I want to work at it. I don't know if I wanted to be devoted to it. Well, then look at that. Do you aspire to realize what's most important? If so, what's most important, also sometimes called faith. And in a sense, you believe that that's most important.

[08:49]

And then you aspire to it. And then if you aspire to it, then when you're ready, are you ready to commit And then with that, with what's most important, aspiring and committing, then you're ready to train in accord with that, to do the things which line up with it and to let go of the things which are distractions. So for me, I do ask that question and I am blessed with answers to the question. And yeah, I'm kind of like, I don't know what, not very interesting person because I keep coming up with kind of like the standard answer for bodhisattvas.

[10:03]

And I'm not trying to get you to have the same ultimate concern as me, but I'm more just tell you about mine so you can see how I work with my ultimate concern. I think my ultimate concern is, yeah, it's true awakening. And then sharing that with all beings. True awakening for the sake of the true awakening of all beings. That's sort of my ultimate concern. Does forgetting this conflict with it? Kind of, yeah. So the forgetting it is one of the things I'm willing to let go of.

[11:12]

If I do forget, nothing much I can do until I discover I forgot. When I discover I forgot, I practice saying of confession and reform, I forgot, I'm sorry. Now I'm going to go back to my aspirations. return to the training which is to learn to remember what's most important all the time. That's part of the aspiration. When you realize complete awakening you will then be on the beam from then on and you won't get distracted. Before that is realized we get sometimes distracted because of the karmic accumulations. However, We can request, and even if we don't request, those who are not distracted are guiding us to remember.

[12:15]

Forgot. And so if I forget, then I also, not only do I try to remember and say, I'm sorry, but I also say, guides, great guides, please help me remember. Please help me respond appropriately when I discover I've forgotten. This is what Dogen prayed for, for his own practice. So we probably have a similar situation. Once I remember, if I do remember, that the Buddha mind, the awakened being, the being awake, is most important, then I can also remember their teachings related to that.

[13:23]

So, as I said earlier, Is this sitting? I said, is this sitting? That's a question. And then moving on from is this sitting? Is this sitting expressing authentic awakening? Is this sitting expressing authentic awakening? Authentic awakening. is most important, it's the best thing for the world, to help all beings. Okay. Is this sitting, we were sitting, is this sitting expressing it? And also, is this sitting, earlier this morning, is this sitting impressing it? on body, speech, and thought?

[14:28]

Is this sitting expressing it in body, speech, and thought? Do I want my sitting or this sitting? Do I want this sitting to express the Buddha mind? Do I want that? Yes, I do. And part of the reason I want it is because that seems good. Because I want the Buddha mind and I want my life to express it. But then there's another turn of the phrase which I didn't mention this morning, which is the statement, the proposal, that if we do, or when we do, express Buddha mind, in our physical postures, in our vocalizations, in our thoughts, when we do, then the entire phenomenal world also expresses or becomes this Buddha mind.

[15:45]

And the entire sky turns into enlightenment. And it is possible to remember this Buddha mind and remember to offer our body, speech, and mind to express it and being impressed by it, to offer that and to participate in this total awakening of all beings. which is going on, and we're trying to get everybody to join it. The Buddha mind is ongoing, but it seems like we interested in it, make it the most salient, not a subsidiary, but the most salient value

[16:50]

aspire to it, commit to it, and train our mind, train our mind to be with it all the time. And if I try that, I notice I have to train. I have to keep being reminded, being reminded, being reminded, or you could say reminding, remembering, by myself. I do it with Eihei Koso. When I see his words and say his words, I am reminded. When you say his words, I am reminded. When I'm reminded, you're reminded. This is how we actually can learn to more and more be with the awakened mind, even while we're talking to people who are, you know, being quite, I don't know what, challenging, saying many things that make it hard for us to remember.

[18:10]

what would be best for them for us to remember. It's good for them if while they're yelling at us, the Buddha mind. It's good for them. Even though they seem to be making it hard for us to remember what's best for them. And of course best for everybody. now we hear some kind of beeping. Do you hear some kind of beeping or buzzing going on? Temporarily. When we heard the beeping, did that distract us from unsurpassed, complete, perfect enlightenment?

[19:17]

The answer is no, it did not. It did not distract. There was a remembering of what was most important when the buzzing went on. When people make commitments, they're distracted. that may be painful for them and painful for us to see. Or if we're the ones that are distracted, it may be painful for us to see our distraction. And that pain at our distraction, the distraction might distract us. But it's also possible to see distraction to feel a pain when you see it or when it's seen and not get distracted. To be right there remembering the Buddha mind and looking at the distraction and expressing the Buddha mind while looking at distraction and pain at the distraction.

[20:37]

But this requires training. And training is available, fortunately, every moment. This is the beginning of a month, pretty much. Close to the beginning of a year. This is the morning of a day. Every moment. is an opportunity to remember and train at the mind of true awakening. And when we start training, the training again itself

[21:38]

turn into a challenge to what we're trying to train ourselves to practice. So, for example, sometimes people... I won't talk about that yet. I'll just say, when we sit, we sat. Somehow, I don't know how it happened, but This happened this morning. What happened this morning is this thing of a bunch of people sitting. Somehow they came in here and they sat. Maybe some of you remember that there were some people sitting here earlier this morning. They came and they sat. And while they were sitting, I guess many things were happening to the body and mind, that the bodies and minds were very alive and active.

[22:46]

And they were sitting. Underlying this sitting was the Buddha mind. And each person who was sitting had a different, had a unique life process that was going on. And each person underlying their sitting was the Buddha mind. And if anybody was doing meditation techniques, and if anybody was trying to do meditation techniques and was not doing it, or if some people weren't doing any meditation techniques, everybody, their sitting was actually founded on the Buddha mind.

[24:04]

everybody was actually expressing it in their sitting. But probably not everybody remembered that. Maybe because of the meditation techniques that they were doing. So as I approach death, I'm more emphasizing mental that underlies all practices rather than the techniques that some people are interested in practicing. There are books in the Buddhist tradition which teach techniques of meditation. And when people read these books and read these techniques, they often think, oh, this is a meditation technique.

[25:16]

But the meditation technique I'm talking to you about in a way isn't really a technique. It's remembering what's most important, whether you're doing a technique or not. At the end of the intensive, we had a sashin. And during the sashin, one of our family stories came up, which many of you have heard before, which is... What does it say in the back of your rock, Sue? How great is the Okesa?

[26:25]

That's what it says. The story I brought up was a story about two of our ancestors. They were Chinese and the Chinese way of saying their names is Tong An, Yuan Zhi. And the other one's name is Liang Shan. So, the Japanese names are Wan Kanshi, and that's the name of the teacher, and the student is

[27:27]

Ryozan Enkan. So the student was studying with the teacher in China. The student, Ryozan, was studying with the teacher, Doan. And the teacher was studying with the student. And the student had the job of being the minister to the teacher. And the teacher had the job of being ministered to by the student. And the teacher also ministered to the student. And one of the ways the teacher ministered to the student was to ask the student questions. The student's part of his job was to carry And one day as the student was giving the teacher the robe, when the teacher received it, the teacher said, what is the business under the robe?

[28:36]

And the student had no words in response. And then the teacher said, now you ask me, am I speaking okay for you? You ask me, the teacher said to the student. The student said, what is the business under the patch robe? And the teacher said, intimacy. With your support someday, I'll write that character out on a piece of paper and give it to you. In Chinese, it's 密. In Japanese, it's 密. And I like to translate it, intimacy. Another translation of it is secret.

[29:39]

Another translation of it is dense. Dense. Another translation is minute or meticulous. What is the business under the patched robe? Intimacy. But you could also say, what is the business under the patched robe? It's a secret. Translations are it's dense. Another translation would be it's inward. And another translation was it's unseen. All those translations, I think, had some bearing. The

[30:48]

Sometimes the family style of Soto Zen is sometimes called menmitsu. The character is cotton. And then mitsu, this character which can be translated as dense or meticulous, means meticulous attention to detail. Or you could say intimate attention to detail. The Chinese characters for the warp and the weft of a fabric, both the warp and the weft use this character for density or intimacy for the threads going vertically and horizontally together with another word, What is the most important thing under the power of intimacy?

[32:02]

Intimacy. Yeah, intimacy. Intimacy. The work is intimacy. The activity under the robe of the Buddha is intimacy. Now, this story of two people who are talking and one of them asks the other one, what's the business under the patch robe?

[33:11]

And the answer was, authentic awakening. The business under the Buddhist robe is authentic awakening. And there was another conversation with the same question, and the answer was, what's the business under suchness? The answer was, suchness, suchness, suchness. Somebody said when I used the word intimacy, that she said, I think of intimacy as like a relationship. What's the business under the patch robe? Relationship. What's the business under the patch robe?

[34:15]

Reciprocity. And in the story, the student and the teacher are doing this reciprocal thing with each other. They're expressing the Buddha mind through their... At the beginning, the teacher seems to understand this, that what we're doing here is expressing intimacy by letting somebody carry your robe and receiving the robe. This receiving the robe is expressing the Buddha mind. Asking the question is expressing the Buddha mind. Receiving the robe is expressing intimacy. Giving the Buddha robe is expressing intimacy.

[35:19]

Asking a question is expressing intimacy. Not having any words is expressing intimacy. Asking the student to ask a question is expressing intimacy. The student asking a question is expressing intimacy. The teacher telling him the answer is expressing intimacy. That's the business according to the ancestors. And that also is suchness. That's the way things are. Is that we're doing this together with each other and with all beings. That we're sitting here we sat here or, you know, our ancestors sat here and now we're sitting here and we're expressing this intimacy.

[36:25]

We're expressing this Buddha mind. and we're trying to join and train into accord with this. This kind of sitting or this sitting is imperceptibly, inconceivably, according with all things and resonates When we sat here this morning and now we're sitting again now, there's a sitting here that's right here. And this sitting that's right here is imperceptibly according with all things right now. From this sitting comes a question. Wouldn't it be good to remember this sitting?

[37:26]

From this sitting comes the question, wouldn't it be good to remember this sitting this sitting, which is reciprocal with that sitting, which is that sitting, which is this sitting, So we have, each of us have the opportunity to practice this sitting. And in the first story in the Book of Serenity, the Buddha comes up to a seat and climbs up in the seat and sits. The Buddha sits.

[38:31]

The Buddha is sitting. And the Buddha, may I say, perhaps not surprisingly, the Buddha is impressed by Buddha. The Buddha is impressed by Buddha into being an impressed sitting Buddha that's expressing the sitting Buddha. The Buddha is intimately with all beings. ...is being such, but not saying. Hello, I'm being such. So the wonderful bodhisattva who happens to be nearby makes a sound, hits a glut, has a gavel, and says, attention,

[39:56]

Clearly observe. The Dharma of the king of Dharma is such. That's the teaching. The teaching is to be such. The teaching is to be intimate. There it is. So, like this morning, I had to tell you, you were sitting this morning just like the Buddha. You were sitting. You were sitting. You were expressing the Buddha mind in your sitting. And it was impressing itself on you. And now we have a Dharma talk, so I tell you that's what you were doing. But before I said anything, and when I shut up, that's what you will be doing.

[41:04]

And you have the opportunity to remember it more and more consistently. And it's hard. As the wheel turns, and it's going to stop on some really obnoxious place. It's hard to remember. Okay, here we go. What is it again? Oh yeah, intimacy. Intimacy with this. Ah, yeah. Turning round and round and now has landed on total distraction. Oh, what a great opportunity to remember stillness and intimacy and suchness. And so that's a summary of the history of Buddhism up till now.

[42:14]

We've all been expressing the Buddha mind seal and we've been in a long process of training and now we have the opportunity to continue. But in order to continue, it seems really necessary that you remember you want to. Without remembering that this is What? The Buddha mind. Without remembering that this is really important. What? The teaching of suchness. Without remembering that the intimacy of reality is really important. It makes it even harder. But if you can remember that's important, it's still hard. But it's much more likely that we will be able to remember And it may be that in the last hour the people in this room have remembered quite a few times.

[43:23]

At least one person has remembered quite a few times. And sometimes that person is called me. Sometimes that person is even called uncle me or auntie me. But sometimes that person's called Pam or Dylan or Christoph or Marlena or Patrick or Justin. Those are other names for what? For the one who remembers. for the intimacy that remembers intimacy.

[44:31]

Me doesn't remember intimacy by himself. It's by intimacy that intimacy is remembered. And it's by intimacy that intimacy is transmitted. It's by suchness that we remember suchness and practice it and transmit it. Reality is sponsoring our realization of reality. And yet, reality needs to sponsor us wanting to realize it. Otherwise, it's kind of like we have an alternative to the ongoing process of realizing the true Dharma. We don't really. But if we don't say we want, that's what we want. If we don't say, I vow from this life on throughout countless lives to hear the true Dhamma, if we don't say that, we might miss it.

[45:40]

We're already on. But we did say it, right? Remember? So we're fine, right? We said we vow. And that counts. But when we say we vow to throw a countless life, that counts. But that also means that we will do it again and again and again. So that changed the world when we said that. And what we said is we're going to say that again and again. We're not going to stop this vow. We vowed not to stop making the vow. We make the vow and we vow to continue for endless, endless time. And anybody who doesn't is an opportunity to remember.

[46:42]

Anybody who doesn't want to remember is an opportunity to remember. and anybody who wants to remember but somehow forgets to remember intimacy, which is our business, our only business. I was just thinking that That talk went on for a long time. And nobody raised their hand. And just then, yes? Is remembering or not remembering an act of will?

[47:53]

Is No. No. But every moment of this, in every moment of this, there is a pattern which is called will. But the will doesn't make the will. The will arises and the will could be that is there for the thought, I wish to remember. But the will doesn't make... You can say vicious, that's fine. Repetitive pattern. Cyclic pattern. And as long as I'm going to be in the cyclic pattern, I'm going to be in the cyclic pattern. Right. I need to be attentive to the cyclic patterns. And I don't think that the vow will give

[48:59]

that's that, which I'm trying to get out. As a matter of fact, for me, sometimes giving the vow and thinking, oh, I gave my vow, I gave my vow, I gave my vow, that actually keeps me not being attentive to what is and going in the vow of being in here now. What you just described is loud. Yeah, it's allowed to happen in this universe, what you just said. The story you just told, we allow it. And why you told the story? That's my wish. My wish is that there would not be any thought on whether it's going to be allowed or not. I don't want anything And so while what you just said is going on, okay, there can be remembering intimacy.

[50:09]

And there is. What? No, no, I'm just saying that there is. And intimacy also... I don't want to put any... And it is or is not on what is. Well, you don't have to. But if you do, if you don't, intimacy is there. But are you enjoying intimacy? You look like you're not. I don't know if I'm enjoying or not enjoying. I don't know. I don't either. But you look like you're not. I don't know either. I'm just saying what you look like. And I'm intimate with the way you look. And you are too. But now you're starting to look a little bit like you're intimate with the way you look.

[51:14]

No, I'm intimate to the inquiry all the time. That I know I'm intimate. I like to inquire. I like to make ideas or assumptions. I know you like to inquire, but sometimes when you're talking, sometimes when you're talking, you look like you forget what you like. I don't think so. I don't think I forget the fact that I'm always inquiring. I'm not saying that you're not interested in it. I'm saying sometimes when you say things, I wonder if you're inquiring while you say them. Yes, that I am doing. Right now, for example? You are? And so you're happy because you're doing what you want to do. In that sense, yes. In that sense, yes. But it's sometimes like kind of paying attention. Well, not just paying attention and inquiring, right?

[52:15]

That's what you said. That's what you want, right? You want paying attention and inquiring no matter what you're doing. Attention and inquiring, yes. Yeah. Okay. One last question before we go. You mentioned about we are sitting on Buddha's mind. Why don't we say we're sitting on the ground? Why do we have to sit on something? Oh, because the ground is Buddha mind. But you can also say Buddha mind is the ground. Okay, so here's where my mind starts to confuse me. So what's the difference between, like, people, all of a sudden say, oh, it has to be Christianity, or Buddha's mind, or Zoroastrian's mind. So, but if we all, if I think, like, we're all sitting on the ground, that nobody kind of... That's fine.

[53:15]

The ground's fine. the most important thing in your ground. Yes. Yeah. So then while you're doing various things, like stating what you like and what you don't like, and you're paying attention to your statements and inquiring while you're doing that, you're remembering the ground. Yeah, that's hard. That's hard because your mind is so... Because now it's the mind. If we're speaking about something or if we're doing something or analyzing or whatever, whatever is, you know, is the mind. But when we're sitting on the ground, the ground is not the mind. Oh, that... What do you call it? That... doesn't make sense with what you said before. You said, why can't we just say we're sitting on the ground?

[54:20]

It doesn't make absolute sense to me. And the way it makes sense to me is when we're sitting on the ground. The ground has no condition. It's unconditioned. The mind has the condition. The mind has the story and all kinds of, everything we want to say is on the mind. And so, you want to sit on the ground unconditioned? Is that what you want to sit on? Yes. Okay. So, are you going to do it? Is that your vow, to sit on the unconditioned? I, I, I'm longing that, I'm longing the What's the word in English? It's ability, the strength.

[55:22]

It's not strength. It's the capacity, longing, the ability, the capacity for that which is. And as long as I don't have this thought, I don't have that, ability or capacity, then I go into my mind. You missed it. You didn't inquire then. You said as long as, and you didn't inquire at that moment. You believed that. You didn't inquire. You believed what you just said. You didn't inquire while you were talking there. I caught you. You did not do what you wanted to do. You did not inquire into what you just said there. You said, as long as I do this, and you didn't inquire into that as you said it. So you got caught by that. So I got trapped into this.

[56:23]

You got trapped into just believing, you believed what you said because you weren't inquiring while you said it. That just happened. So you don't want to do what you just did, but you did do it. No, you don't want that. You want to inquire. You want to inquire all this stuff. That's what Jesus said. And I'm happy to support you to do that. Okay. Well, you want to inquire with no beliefs. Inquiry doesn't have the requirement of no beliefs. Inquiry doesn't have stuck to it, no beliefs. It doesn't have that. So what you want, it doesn't go with inquiry. So you have to give up that second part. Are you ready to give it up?

[57:26]

Which do you want? Do you want to get rid of beliefs or do you want to do inquiry? They don't go together. Let's say beliefs. You want to get rid of beliefs and forget about inquiry for now? Okay, fine. So now we have a new program. Forget about inquiry and just get rid of it. That's what you think. But you're not going to inquire. However, when I inquire into it, I think that's a trap. Getting rid of beliefs is not inquiry. It's a trap. And also, holding on to beliefs is a trap. So... I didn't say you are. You just said... But before you said you wanted to get rid of them.

[58:27]

You wanted to get rid of the beliefs. No, it's not... It's the beliefs are... The beliefs are kind of what is no belief. So if the reason I say I don't want is because I don't want to say no belief. No belief is more clear. Did you say you don't want to say it? No belief is more clear. So you're saying it and you're saying it. Yes, I'm saying it because I'm seeing it. Yeah. So is there a way of not seeing it? Or seeing it is, I don't know. I'm just questioning.

[59:29]

If there is a way of not seeing the beliefs, or the way is to see the beliefs and not not give too much, not give anything to it. That's the one. So if the beliefs are there, am I capable of seeing the beliefs without giving any meaning or anything to it? If the beliefs are there, they're there, but the question is the weight, the weight that... Good question. And I think it's been proposed that there's a type of practice which gives the beliefs the appropriate

[60:39]

which is not much and also not too little. So part of the training is giving the beliefs enough attention to just let them be and not too much so that they become pits and prisons. Trying to get rid of them is giving them too much. Not inquiring into them is giving them too much. Giving them compassion is giving them too much. Let's see. giving that statement I just made, compassion, is intimacy.

[61:50]

According with what's going on already is the work.

[62:07]

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