Brothers and sisters, I have some stories for you. One took place in China, in the Tang Dynasty. The name of the story is Uncle Me's white rabbit. Uncle Me is... Me, by the way, means mystery or intimacy. There's a Buddhist monk whose name was... Part of his name was Intimacy, so they called him Uncle Me. He was an old monk. And one day he was walking along the road, a road, with his younger brother, Dharma brother, the awesome Zen master, Dongshan.

[01:17]

And suddenly a white rabbit ran across the road from one side to the other. And Uncle Mi said, Swift. And the younger master said, How? Uncle Mi said, Like a commoner. suddenly becoming a prime minister. Just like that. Cross the road and go from being a peasant to a prime minister of China. Just like that. That fast. And Deng Xiaon said, the Chinese is, he said, old, old, great, great.

[02:33]

So venerable and so great. And still you talk like this. You're so old and great and still you have words like this. And the elder uncle said, well, how about you? And Dung Shan said, after generations of nobility temporarily fallen into stinginess, Good.

[03:39]

Looks like you have... I need to talk. So when one Zen monk sees a rabbit crossing a road, he thinks, you can become a Buddha... An ordinary person can become a Buddha that fast. And the other one thinks, please. Can you hear me in the back? Please, Uncle Me. Please don't talk like that. Well, what do you say? I say, after being a Buddha for a long time, temporarily you become small, you become poor, you temporarily become a little stingy about what's going on.

[04:52]

Second story. Probably took place, I don't know, a long time before. I mean, did take place a long time before. It took place in India at the time that the Buddha Shakyamuni was alive. And he was talking to his monks, his great monks. Monks who had become personally liberated they had freed themselves from their own self-delusion. And the Buddha told them, one of them, he said that this one, one of the leading ones, leaders, one of the leaders of the enlightened disciples, he said, this disciple will in the future become a Buddha. Buddhas are more than just enlightened beings, more than just a being who is free from her own delusion and clinging.

[06:15]

Buddhas are those whose practice is the practice of all living beings. Buddhas are those who are practicing together with each of us and all of us right now. So he told his disciples that you enlightened disciples who are not practicing basically by yourself will become a Buddha. You will realize the way of practicing together with all beings. And the disciples were very happy to hear this. And they said, You have now given us something we never had before. And we would like to, by way of parable, tell you how we feel." So they told the Buddha a story about how they felt.

[07:23]

They said, World Honored One, it's like a child a son or a daughter who abandons her father and runs off and wanders and wanders. and finally can't find her way back home and can't even remember her parents. And he wanders and wanders and gradually becomes more and more destitute and self-concerned and poverty-stricken.

[08:33]

and is only concerned for working to get food and clothing and is unable to do so very well and becomes emaciated and stingy and has a low opinion of himself. And he wanders like this for 50 years. And then finally, by chance, in wandering here and there, he just happens to turn towards where his father is living. He goes into the town where his father lives.

[09:35]

Meantime, his father has been thinking about him constantly for 50 years. But unable to find her. And during that time, he continued his business and is very successful. So the way the disciples told the story was, in terms of India 2,500 years ago, he had lots of elephants. That would be, I guess, the equivalent to lots of, not Mercedes, but Rolls-Royces. And he also had lots of cattle, that would be like Mercedes, and then so on.

[10:46]

He had goats and sheep, innumerable, you know, vast land holdings covered with valuable vehicles and animal resources. He also had lots of vehicles, lots of chariots, lots of palanquins and carriages. And his chariots and carriages were covered with jewels and precious fabrics. And he had all kinds of different levels of servants and retainers and advisors, clerks and accountants and lawyers. He lived in a great palace. And the palace was, you know, bedecked and adorned with all kinds of precious materials. And he had storehouses which were full of gold and jewels, diamonds, rubies, lapis lazuli, coral, pearls.

[11:58]

Silver. You get the impression, when I was a kid, I used to read this comic book, Uncle Scrooge comic books. Instead of Uncle Me, they had Uncle Scrooge. And Uncle Scrooge had a lot of money. He was Donald Duck's uncle, I think. Is that right? Is that right? and he had a lot of money and he used to keep his money in these big vaults and these vaults you could like go into them open them up and he would dive into the vaults and it'd be like this ocean of money and he would like swim in the money I always kind of liked that and he had one big tub you know where he kept all his money in one of the cartoons and it was it was like it looked like a huge uh you know a huge water tank And it was so full of stuff that the money was like squirting out through the holes, you know, dripping out on the street. So the father had like storehouses like that.

[13:05]

So the son walks by and at the gate of the father's house, he looks off afar and sees this palace and he sees his father walking. sitting up on a lion throne with all his retainers and extremely precious adornments all around him. He sees them and he says, hmm, this is probably not a good neighborhood for me. If these people see me, they might detain me and press me into service. Better for me to go someplace, some small village someplace, where I can get some employment. And if I work hard, if I work hard, I will be able to receive food and clothing. So thinking those thoughts, he raced off.

[14:08]

from the gate of his father's house. At that time, his father was sitting up in his chair and happened to be able to see his son out there by the gate. It had been 50 years, and the son had become greatly changed and emaciated and destitute and so on, but he recognized his son at once And he asked one of his, someone standing nearby, actually two people standing nearby, he dispatched them to go and, I don't know what the word is, to bring the son back to him. So they ran off after the son, caught up with him, and laid hands upon him and held him.

[15:13]

The son was frightened and alarmed, thinking that he was being apprehended falsely, unjustly. He angrily said, why are you apprehending me? Why are you holding me? I've done no crime. Leave me alone. But they held him even more strongly. AND HE THOUGHT, OH, NO, THEY'RE GOING TO... THEY THINK I'VE COMMITTED A CRIME. THEY'RE GOING TO, LIKE, KILL ME. THIS IS MY DEATH. AND HE FAINTED. THE FATHER, SOMEHOW ABLE TO SEE THIS AT QUITE A DISTANCE, REALIZED WHAT WAS GOING ON AND SOMEHOW CALLED OUT TO HIS MESSENGERS TO LET HIM GO AND TOLD THEM TO SPRINKLE SOME WATER ON HIM TO REVIVE HIM. AND THEY DID, AND HE WAS REVIVED. AND THEY SAID, YOU CAN GO. JUST GO WHEREVER YOU WANT. YOU'RE RELEASED. The son was relieved and ran away.

[16:18]

Then the father got an idea and he sent two more of his attendants, had them dressed in very dirty clothes. He sent some of his skinniest And he sent them, and they found the son. And he instructed them to offer the son employment at double wages. And if he asked what kind of work it is, tell him it's the work of removing and cleaning up excrement from his herds. So they caught the son, they offered him the job, and the son said, great, and asked for his wages in advance. And receiving the wages, he went to work.

[17:20]

The father watched him work from a distance and was happy with being able to see his son. And then one day he dressed up himself in rags and smeared filth on himself and took in his right hand an instrument or a tool for clearing away excrement and went to the work scene and in a gruff voice said, keep at the work. Don't be lazy. And in that way, he could be near to his son. His son had a very low opinion of himself, and he couldn't accept that he had a father like that, of such wealth, that he was from such a wealthy family.

[18:43]

but he could accept a gruff man telling him to work harder. Now, then the father came back some time later and said to him, actually, you're working quite well here, and offered to give him some extra, what you might say, a little better housing and so on and so forth. And kind of gave him a promotion, increased, gave him a, what do you call it, raised his salary. And the son accepted it and was happy, but still had a low opinion of himself. Then the father came back again and actually told the son that he was like a son to him. And that he was going to treat him like a son.

[19:51]

And his son accepted that and kept working. And he worked in that way for 20 years, shoveling this excrement. I was thinking the story is getting kind of long, but actually it hasn't been twenty years. After twenty years the father came to see his daughter. told her that he needed some help running the business and taught her how to run the business, what the inventory was, what needed to be given out to people and what needed to be received.

[20:58]

And after she learned all this, he told her at one point, you know, from now on I'd like you to think of us not as two different people. You really are like my daughter. And you're learning how to run this whole house. And I'm not going to live much longer, so I think you're going to have to take over. Not have to, but I'd like you to if you're willing. And I'd like you to organize a meeting and call all the leaders of the country here. I'd like to explain this to them." And one thing I forgot to mention about the story is that in the father constantly thinking about his lost child, he was always concerned that his wealth would be scattered and lost.

[22:09]

And if you think about, you know, Somebody who's rich, he might think, so what if all their wealth just got dispersed all over the world? What would be the problem if everybody in the world got a little bit of it? But I think the point is that the idea of it being scattered and lost and that the wealth in this case is not material wealth. but something which actually just plain can get lost. And unless it's given to someone who can really receive it and take care of it, it gets lost. So he was worried that all his wealth wouldn't be given and cared for. Anyway, he gathered together all these people. The son actually organized a meeting, gathered all these people together, and he said, this person here,

[23:13]

She's been working with me for a long time, shoveling shit for 20 years, and now has learned the business. And I've been treating this person just like my own child. And we're just like one person. But actually, this child actually is my child. Not just like my child. And always has been. But since she couldn't believe it, I had to have her work hard all these years. so she developed confidence to accept what she always was. The daughter was very happy to hear this and this is something which she didn't understand before. And so finally she had enough confidence not to be confident that she was in this family, but to understand that she always was in the family.

[24:18]

But somehow there seems to be the necessity to develop confidence to accept who we really are. So the Buddha is willing to give us a lot of work if we want a lot of work. And then we can think that we do the work and so on for 20, 30, 40 years. But that's not the Buddha's point of view. The Buddha's willing to have us be in the family right now. Many people think that if we... I don't know what many people think, but anyway, we might think that if we clean our room and do our jobs, if we do our work well and we're skillful,

[26:48]

that that effort which we do will be good. And I think that's right. We might even think that if we work hard and so on that, I don't know, we might even think that that might even have something to do with us being awake and really free. Free. Maybe something like that. Some people might think that way. And then if you thought that way, you might be willing to work hard to get that.

[27:51]

But in this story of the life of Buddha and the relationship between Buddha and Buddha, The work you do is not what has the function to bring the realization of your Buddhahood. The realization comes not from what you do or don't do. The realization comes from the realization. Your awakening comes from your awakening.

[29:07]

You already have. the awakening. It is your nature. That's where awakening comes from. But we may have wandered away from this for a while and have a low opinion of ourselves and think that we have to do something to be okay I wonder if, do we think, do you think that you are different from Buddha?

[30:26]

Do you think that you're the same as Buddha? I propose that we are not different from Buddha and not the same as Buddha. I propose that we are inseparable from Buddha, and Buddha is inseparable from us.

[31:52]

And how come we don't realize this? If we don't realize it, it's because, well, it's because we seek elsewhere. the realization of our inseparability from Buddha is not seeking elsewhere. It isn't that if you don't seek elsewhere that then by not seeking elsewhere you realize Buddha.

[33:09]

Not seeking elsewhere is realizing Buddha. And in order to not seek elsewhere, we need to renounce seeking elsewhere. because we have a strong habit of seeking elsewhere. And if we renounce seeking elsewhere, we may feel both joy and sadness. Sadness because we have given up

[34:10]

our old friend of seeking elsewhere, our dear pal, which is all the habits, all the ways we seek elsewhere, all the ways we try to be someplace else, all the ways we look for alternatives and try to realize them. we feel sad maybe to let go of them even though at the same time we may feel a great joy at what is opened up when we let go of trying to do something trying to work hard so that we can be free and happy.

[35:16]

I'm sorry to use the same stories over and over, but anyway, I have a daughter and when she was born, I gave her her first bath and I also gave her her second bath and so on. I was the bather of the daughter. That was one of my jobs. And so I, unless I was not around, I was the one who gave her her bath for eight years. This was good for me. I got a bath out of the deal, which I might not have gotten otherwise. And when she was eight, with a little prompting from certain people, I told her that I thought we should, that it was time for us to stop taking baths together, that she was getting to be too old to take baths with her father.

[36:54]

And she said, well, why? And I said, well, have you noticed that you're growing up and getting bigger? She said, yeah. And I said, have you noticed you're getting to be more like your mother? You're not so much a little girl now, you're getting to be more like a grown-up woman. She said, yeah. I said, well, wouldn't it be funny? Can you see what it would be like for your mother to take a bath with your grandfather? Wouldn't that be funny? And she said, yeah. And then she said, OK. That's a short version of the story. Then later, a little while later after she dried off and got her pajamas on, she came into the bedroom of her mother and father.

[38:07]

And she didn't actually come in. She just came to the door and stuck her head in. She didn't approach the room with her normal, what do you call it, proprietorial grandeur. Usually she treated our bedroom as hers, as sort of like a, what do you call it, an auxiliary bedroom of hers. She thought our bed was kind of hers, although she didn't sleep with us. She acted as though she owned it. Anyway, she kind of tentatively stuck her head in the door and kind of looked sad. And her mother said, are you sad? I told her about the end of the bath and bathing. And she said, yeah. And she said, well, you know he still loves you. And she said, I know. And then, this is my view.

[39:16]

She kind of looked out across the room, out the window. And... I felt like she was looking out to this, seeing this horizon, this big horizon out there, that she suddenly realized that the end of this time where she was a little girl taking baths with her father was the beginning of another life. And she could kind of see it. And then she started to smile. And I could feel that she was seeing her womanhood out there with all its frightening aspects, but all of its potential. So there was this sadness and joy of losing that time with your father, that way of being with your father, but also opening up this whole new world. The joy and the sadness were mixed. So I don't know, you know.

[40:23]

where you stand. I don't know if it's time yet for you to stop taking baths with your father or baths with your mother. In other words, I don't know if it's time for you to open up to the horizon of practice, a practice, a way of practicing which is no longer you doing something like crossing the road or sitting in meditation or cleaning your room so that you can become a prime minister or a great Buddha. I don't know if you're ready to set aside your childhood ways of doing something to be Buddha and just accept the responsibility of your inheritance as a human being.

[41:40]

Because it's sad to put away all those things you do to make yourself good All those things you do because you think you're not good enough and that you should do something to be better. It's hard for us to embrace the totality of what we are.

[43:06]

Sometimes it's hard for us to embrace that things are that things are the way they are and let them be that way and still hope that things that have not yet reached their full potential can reach their full potential. It's hard for us sometimes to see something that hasn't reached its full potential a person, a plant, an animal, to see something and hasn't yet realized its fullness, its potential maturity, and want it to reach its maturity, at the same time completely appreciate it the way it is now. And this applies to looking at ourselves, too.

[44:10]

to looking at our current state of enlightenment, our current state of understanding, our current state of practice in this world. But I propose that this is possible. That it is possible to completely appreciate the way you are now and the way someone else is now and see that full potential has not been realized and hope for it and want it without deprecating the current situation and not even trying to change the current situation because you so much appreciate the current situation. I find that this is very hard for many of us to straddle those two realities.

[45:16]

We may think, oh, if you really appreciate the way something is, that you'll just become complacent. how could you hope that it would be different if you really appreciate the way it is? Well, it's actually not that you hope that it would be different, but that you appreciate the way it is, and because you appreciate the way it is, you want more for it without, again, having any problem with the way it is. I shouldn't say not having any problem, but not wishing it was different. If you see, again, maybe a child, a beautiful child, a child you think is beautiful, I should say,

[46:34]

You think the child's beautiful. The child is suffering. And the child perhaps thinks that she's got something wrong with her. And you see her suffering for what she imagines is wrong with her. And you completely appreciate her in her state of thinking badly of herself. And it even hurts you that she thinks badly of herself. But you do not think she needs to be better than she is. She thinks she needs to be better than she is, but you don't think so. You think she is simply beautiful. You love her. You love her means not that you like her, but that you appreciate her the way she is now.

[47:37]

You love her as she is now in her suffering. You don't love her suffering like you like her suffering. You love her suffering in the sense that you accept her suffering. And her suffering hurts you. And you want her to be free of her suffering. you desire that she become free of her suffering, but without in any way deprecating the way she is now in her suffering state. Because you understand that the reason why she's suffering is because she is deprecating herself in her state. And if you wish she wasn't the way she is, You reinforce her suffering. You say, yes, the way you think, which is the source of your suffering, is right.

[48:40]

Keep thinking that way. Keep thinking that there's something wrong with you and it should be changed, rather than there's nothing wrong with you, you are Buddha's child, Buddha loves you as you are now or accepting you as you are now is Buddhist love. And Buddhist love also wants you to realize this, not seeking elsewhere. Again, I thought my daughter was fine when she was whatever age, six or seven.

[49:48]

And I learned how to ride a bicycle when I was about seven. So when she was about six or seven, I asked her if she'd like to learn how to ride a bicycle. And she said, no. And then I got her a bicycle. And I gave it to her for Christmas. And then after I gave her the bicycle, I said, do you want to learn how to ride a bicycle? And she said, no. So the bicycle just sat in the garage. And about a year later, I asked her again if she wanted to ride a bicycle. I didn't buy another bicycle. And she said, no. I wanted to teach her how to ride a bicycle. I wanted to do that with her. I wanted the joy of teaching her and helping her learn how to ride a bicycle.

[50:56]

I wanted the joy of that. I wanted to be there when she learned. I want to be there when people learn. I want to be there when people learn. This is my greatest joy in life. I want to be there when I learn. This is my joy." And my wife told me about when her father taught her to ride a bicycle. She told me how he taught her. I was ready to teach. But my daughter didn't want to learn, so there was no teaching. But I didn't feel like there was something wrong with my daughter, that she wasn't learning how to ride a bicycle.

[52:00]

I just wanted her to learn for herself and for me. Because her learning how to ride a bicycle is me learning how to ride a bicycle. Everything she learns is me learning. but I did not get impatient with her. I'm kind of bragging. I did not get impatient with her at not doing, taking the lessons so that I could have the joy of her learning how to ride a bicycle and participating in that. Anyway, one day she said, do you want to teach me how to ride a bicycle? And I said, yes. And We went and borrowed a bicycle, and we went to Golden Gate Park, and I did the thing I was waiting to do.

[53:07]

I took one hand, my right hand, I put in the back of the bicycle seat, and my left hand I put on the handlebar. And then I walked next to her as she pedaled. and I steadied her. And then I let go of the handle bar and she steered and I just steadied her. So she pedaled and steered and I held the seat and steadied her. And I walked and ran alongside of her. She pedaled and steered. And sometimes I'd assisted her steering, but pretty soon she could steer by herself, but she wasn't yet balancing. And then pretty soon I was holding on less and less, balancing, I was stabilizing the seat less and less, and less and less, and barely touching the seat. And she was doing the steering, and she was doing the pedaling, and she was doing the balancing. And then she said, let go, Dad. And I let go, and she went off. And it was better than I thought it would be. It wasn't what I thought it would be.

[54:13]

It was better. But I didn't think she was better afterwards. It wasn't a better or worse of her. It was just a joy of learning. When we wake up, it isn't that Buddha thinks, now we're better from Buddha's perspective. It's just, no, that we wake up to who we are Buddhas are born from the desire that we learn who we are. But they don't look down on us the way we are now. They just hope we'll realize what we are right now. And not to seek elsewhere to realize this. The practice is not a practice that I do.

[55:53]

It's not a practice that I do. It's not a practice that you do. It's not a practice that Buddha does. It's not a practice that anybody does. The practice is not doing something. The practice is just trusting what is happening without trying to get anything out of it, without manipulating it, without seeking elsewhere. Practice is not something I do or you do or Buddha does. It is the practice that Buddha does with all of us and we do with each other and we do with Buddha. But I take away the word do. It is the practice of us practicing together.

[56:58]

It is the practice of us practicing with all Buddhas and all Buddhas practicing with all of us. And there's nobody doing anything. Everybody is just being who they are. and appreciating that and hoping that this appreciation of ourselves and others, hoping that that will bring the great fruit of freedom and peace and compassion and wisdom without anybody deprecating in any way anybody or anything by trying to improve it the slightest bit and that in fact to appreciate things the way they are without trying to improve them to appreciate your state to appreciate your perception of yourself and others the way it is

[58:11]

without trying to make it better. It doesn't become better. It just grows up. It just blooms. But the flower is not better than the seed in this practice. The flower is the seed being left to be the seed and do its seed thing. And if we try to improve a seed into a flower, we can stop the flower. So how can we appreciate the current state of each living being as it is now? Amen. So I've been going on a really long time and I just want to make one more really hard example.

[59:57]

I want to just take the person or a person who you really have a hard time with. Some person maybe that you think is really bad. Some person you think is really evil. Or not necessarily somebody you think is evil, but somebody who you have a problem with are evil. Some evil people you might like. But take somebody who you really have trouble just letting them be that. And somebody you really think should be different. from the way they are. Somebody who you really think is kind of like one of the mistakes of the universe. Somehow the universe has allowed this person to happen, but it really is a mistake and they shouldn't be this way. They should have their nose straightened or something. They should have their attitude adjusted.

[61:00]

This person really is not the way they should be. Take somebody you really feel like that with. at least mentally, just contemplate this person who's not the way they should be. And what I'm proposing is that if I can let that person be the way they are now, including let it be that I think they should be different. This is the person, their definition is they should be different. And let that person who should be different just be that person. I propose that that person for you will bloom, and you will realize the beauty of this person. And if you can realize the beauty of this person, this person may be able to also bloom, may be able to accept in the same way who they are, and they may also think,

[62:05]

that you should change or that they should change but they too can bloom. In this way we set ourselves free from our own attitude that other people are not what they should be and our mind blooms because we don't try to control and we also show the example to those very people who we wish would be different and help them accept who they are and learn and bloom. Thinking about this practice, I wonder, you know, I wonder, am I really going to be able to give myself to it? I'm going to try. Starting right now. How about you? Is there anything you'd like to discuss?

[63:17]

Yes? And it's part of the reason that there's family. What brings to mind in my life is that I have someone for breakfast at food. I keep asking them to consistently show us their bare life. They don't follow through. It's clear to me that I'm doing something to myself, that I'm asking for help to get something out of it now. And so I have some of the relations. It's global there.

[64:22]

It's not a difficult thing to be in trouble and in control. And clearly, as I've executed it, I've been using it as sort of a stand. It's done things for me that I've done. It's done a lot of things for me that I've not been able to give myself. And it felt to me like that's a lot, but the stories were about it. And so I wondered if you had something more to say to take that extra step of be brave inside to stop acceptance. Both that and accept it as a being that I accept myself. That's why I'm here. It's a creative struggle. Does that make sense? It makes sense, but it seems like you already know what's going on, so I don't quite see any question there.

[65:26]

It seems like you're observing what's happening and... Well, could you say something to help solve exceptions? That's where I'm stuck. I think I keep doing the dance because it's something I'm not accepting in myself, but I don't know what it is that I do. You think there's something about yourself that you're not accepting, but you're not sure what it is? Or do you think maybe it's just that you need the space to find that, and sort of do it again, but I don't want to do that. It's like watching yourself step in a hole for a hundred times, and you keep going, and you figure out that you can only step in. So you keep doing something over and over.

[66:30]

You see that. You see that you think you're doing something over and over. Is that right? And you have some problem with how things are going. So far, you've heard everything I said. And then is there something, is there some sense of that?

[67:46]

this situation where not only are you doing something, not only are you living a life where you think you're doing something, but you're also aware of yourself doing it? While you're doing it, you're not so present. But later you realize you weren't so present. At that time, it's hard to be present in the midst of that. So one might wonder, is there some way that one could be more present from now on? How about now?

[68:50]

Are we present now? I don't think so. I feel myself wanting from you, I think, in a similar way that I want from someone else. And there's a way I can feel myself a little bit numbing to this experience. You feel yourself numbing to this experience right now? You're a little anxious? And you're a little bit...want to numb yourself to that anxiety?

[69:53]

Is that what you're saying? Well, that would be a good thing to be numb to, if you're going to be numb to something. Anxiety would be one of the best things to be numb to. Yeah. That's the main thing I think we want to be numb to, is anxiety. And vulnerability and anxiety, of course, are closely related. So foolish to what?

[71:01]

What's so foolish? What's foolish to the rational mind? But what behavior? Before you get into the asking... Well, not recognizing things for what they are and also trying to create some alternative to what's happening, trying to get away from our anxiety. and then maybe getting other people involved in getting us away from our anxiety. This seems like not such a good idea. Interesting? But, at the same time, what I was talking about today is, is it possible, I'm not going to say is it possible, I think it is possible to look at someone, some other person, and also to look at yourself, and to see someone who is trying to get away from his anxiety, who's distracting himself from his anxiety, and see that this person is beautiful while they're

[72:24]

while they're anxious and while they're trying to get away from their anxiety, to see that this person who's looking for an alternative to her life is beautiful right now. But not try to see that they're beautiful, but to realize that what's appearing to you is the Buddha's truth, the Buddha's teaching. All the time what's appearing is Buddha's teaching. Buddha's teaching can appear in any form. It can be bitter. It can be in the form of someone who's trying to run away from her pain. And that someone can be someone over there or over here. But to let this person who's trying to run away from her anxiety be just a person who's trying to run away from her anxiety is actually appreciation of this person.

[73:39]

I think the best way to appreciate the person is to let her be who she is. So if she is trying to run away from her anxiety, and asking someone else to help her get away from it, if that's what she's doing, let her be that. Hmm? Did you say, yuck? Yeah. I hear you, but it also... You want to... Yeah, so I'm looking at a person... I'm looking at a person who wants to stop doing something. And I let that person be a person who wants to stop doing something. I let you be this person that you are. That's what I'm trying to do, is let you be who you are. I'm letting you be somebody who wishes she would stop doing something that she thinks she's doing.

[74:44]

I'm letting you do that. That's the way I'm relating to you. That's where I start. I don't start with the way you used to be. I don't start with the way you're going to be. I start with the way you are now. Right now I do that. That's what I'm trying to do. So as something, when things come just let things come rather than try to control them. By control do you mean react to?

[75:45]

Well, of course you can't control things. But anyway, if what's coming is Buddha Dharma, would you try to trade that in for something else? Then what you have is Buddhadharma manifesting as another person who seems to be trying to control you. But the question is, do you look at this as Buddhadharma coming to you and learn from it? Or do you try to trade this in for something else, for starters? In the next section of column 56, the other feet do not get wet, something like that.

[76:52]

The feet are not wet? Well, you don't know how to deal with it? Is that what you said? Yeah. when you say you don't know how to deal with it, what does that mean that you don't know how? Well, when you find it maddening, isn't that the way you're dealing with it? You know that way, don't you? Feel maddened. That's one of the ways you deal with it, right? So you got that down. So is there anything else you want to know about? Are you all set? You have a way to deal with it, right? You'd like another way?

[77:58]

Did you say another way? Or a better way? So you deal with it this way, okay? All right? Now, when you deal with it that way, is that Buddha Dharma? When you find yourself dealing with it that way, is that Buddha Dharma? Your Buddha Dharma? You have your own? It's not my Buddha Dharma too? It's our Buddha Dharma? You hope it's not our Buddha Dharma? Just yours? Well, maybe, maybe I should try another attack here. When something's happening, okay, you let it be that.

[79:09]

Okay. And then, huh? When you let something be what it is, at that time do you run out of patience? No, no. At that time. At the time that you let something... At the time something happens and you let it be what it is, at that time do you run out of patience? No, no, no. It doesn't continue to happen. We're not talking about another time. I'm talking about a time. I'm not talking about something that continues to happen. I'm talking about what's happening. Nothing continues to happen. If things continue to happen, things can't continue to happen. That's what I'm talking about, okay? Something happens and then it's over. It doesn't continue.

[80:15]

It would just be... It happens in another way. Yeah, which is called another thing. Okay? So things happen, and if you let them be as they happen, let them be what they are, okay, at that time, that's what's happening. Are you willing to work with what's happening? Yes. Okay. Are you patient right now? Yeah. That's it.

[81:23]

You let things be what they are, that's patience. Patience is having the capacity for what's happening. It's being big enough for what's happening. And it only applies to the present. It doesn't apply to the future. So when something happens and you can't let it be what it is, that's a form of impatience. So impatience is very similar to not seeing and letting what's happened be what is happening. So if you've got someone in your life who's behaving in a way that's painful to you or whatever, however it is, to let it be that way, is what I'm talking about. That is what I call love, is to let this thing be what it is.

[82:28]

It is also patience. It is also mindfulness. And it is being present with this, whatever this is. It is not trying to control what's happening. It is trusting that being with what's happening will blossom into freedom. But not necessarily thinking, oh if I'm present with what's happening it will blossom into freedom. not necessarily thinking that thought, but acting like that. Being with what's happening with that kind of confidence that being with what's happening will is freedom. Being with what's happening is freedom. It is freedom and it will blossom as freedom too. It will unfold as freedom.

[83:32]

You will understand that. Is this easy? No, it's not. Why is it not easy? It's not easy because we think we have an alternative to being with what's happening. We think we can negotiate with reality, trade it in on something else. Because we think we can do that, and because other people encourage us to think that way, and because other people encourage us that way, and we take up their encouragement, because we do that, we're very strong at that, and therefore we suffer. And giving up this strong habit, which is supported by so many people, it's like giving up your strength, your personal power, and giving up your power club, giving up the society of power mongers who are encouraging each other to try to control the universe into their version of an acceptable, happy world.

[84:36]

Rather than working with what's happening and by coming from what's happening, Let that modify the world. Let that make it a new world. Coming from what's happening rather than coming from trying to make things the way I want them. Which is endless frustration, that path. The path of trying to control what's happening rather than the path of becoming intimate through love with what's happening. Yeah. So I have a question that this thing about positive thinking, affirmations... You have a question about positive thinking? Yeah, like where does that work in with... Well, I have this idea that if I...

[85:45]

speak in language and think in certain ways that the beliefs that I have that don't support me or don't, yeah, that don't support me the way I want to, that if I use affirmations or if I try and use speech that, I don't know, anyway, it's more clear, which I'm having trouble doing now, that That in that way, that supports my life better than if I just go from knee-jerk ways that I have from just growing up and just being in the world. So I know I'm not being too clear. So my question maybe is that being with what's happening and... I just don't know where all this fits in.

[86:54]

You know, you say how people are saying to control your world, and so right away it brought to my mind of affirmations and all the rest of sort of New Age thinking. And I don't quite know how to fit all that in with what's happening as well. Uh-huh. So you mentioned something like... a practice where you... What do you do? Is it something you do? Well... Are you talking about something you do? Yeah, for instance. For instance, yeah. Let's say I'm with a person and I want them to be different because their actions, I don't like it. Okay, you're with somebody, they want them to be different. I want them to be different. You don't like what they're doing. I don't like what they're doing. Okay, let's say that. So let's just say that. All right. That's the situation. That's the situation. Okay. So I notice that. Yes. And I also, and at that time I say, okay, I want this to be different, and that's who I am, is this person wanting this to be different.

[88:02]

And so rather than, my first reaction would be to say to them, you're so stupid, we could just, you know, do things my way, or whatever. Could I stop for a second here? No, no. So first of all, you're in a situation where something's happening and you sort of don't like it. You don't think it's really what should be happening. Right. Okay. So right there, you notice that you think that things should be different. Right. You notice that. Something's happening and something happens and also something else happens, mainly a judgment happens. Right. And you judge it as not so good. And I see myself... Okay, now we just stop right there. Let's just let that be. Okay? Now if you had let the first thing be completely, then right then, you'd be free. Whatever it was. The person looks at you cross-eyed like you're looking at me right now.

[89:05]

Anyway, whatever it is, if you let it be what it is, let it be what it is, just what it is. Okay? There's freedom from suffering right there. That's it. All over, for that moment, you're free. Okay? Then, the next moment, something else could happen. Maybe what happens the next moment is, I don't like this. Could happen. I don't like this. Okay? That could happen. Let that be what it is. you're free. Now, it is less likely that you'll think thoughts like, I don't like this, right after you're free, but you could, because when you're free, you can think thoughts like, I don't like this. So what actually would happen would be more like, something happens, you let it be what it is, which is not doing anything to it,

[90:09]

Because it already is what it is. What I mean by let it be what it is, I mean let it be what you think it is. Like, I think this is a woman. Let a woman be a woman. I think that's a sound. Let a sound be a sound. I think it's a sight. I let a sight be a sight. I let it be what I think it is. I let my perceptions be my perceptions. Then I'm free. Right off. It's all over. when you let something be what it is, you didn't do anything to it. You can't identify with it or disidentify with it then. You're not located in or outside of it. Hmm? I said, oh man. Oh man what? It's just a... It's difficult for me to think of that in terms of, you know, like work.

[91:12]

Old man? What does old man mean? I know, but what does old man mean? Let's see what it meant. This is boggling. I felt overwhelmed by... Okay, let's take a step. I'll do it the easy way then. I'll just say, you let at work, you let what you hear be what you hear. That's it. and then you'll be free. Now, in the next moment you could say, I don't like this, but it would be like this amazing thing of I'm saying I don't like this and yet I'm free. This is like an expression of freedom now rather than an expression of like I'm in a bad situation because I don't like it. It's like I'm so free I cannot like things and it's not a problem anymore. So it's not real not liking. It is a judgment. I don't like this. But the judgment is more like an act of freedom rather than an act of bondage.

[92:13]

And also you let that be what it is. You say, my God, here I am thinking I don't like this and it's just me thinking I don't like it. That's it. There's no more than that. And so you're free again. Now, This has nothing to do with you doing anything. This is like I'm talking about entering a world where you're not doing anything anymore. It's a relief, but also it's scary for people to enter into a world where you're not doing anything anymore, where you're now like, what do you call it, a Buddha robot or something, where your speech and your hands and stuff are not manifesting freedom. But it's not you doing anything anymore. It's like it's enlightenment in action rather than karma. Rather than Basha doing this and Basha doing that and you not doing this and you not doing that, rather than a power trip, your actions are now love.

[93:19]

They're not what you do anymore because they come from the way things are rather than you trying to make things a certain way. So if a person's free, they can do any kind of new age or old age affirmation that comes out of that freedom. A free person can do affirmations, it's just that they no longer are hung up in the view that they are a power source. They're not acting with everybody. When you're acting with everybody, you're free. When you're not acting with everybody, you run into trouble. Interference, because you're not in cooperation with what's happening. You get by with a little bit here and there, but basically, if you look carefully, there's always this little something's off. So these affirmations are fine when they come from

[94:24]

the what's happening. And if they're not coming from what's happening, they're relatively good or bad. Some affirmations work better than others. Some are more skillful than others. But if they're based on your own personal power, they put you into bondage. Oh, man. Yes, Excuse me. When life becomes painful and you let the pain be painful, you know, your judgment, this is painful, when you let it just be painful, right then, okay, at that moment, that you let it be that way, you don't have time for it to become, you can't lose any hope at that point. Okay, but if you don't want to do that practice, that's okay. But I'm just pointing out that what I'm talking about is when you're in pain,

[95:28]

you let that pain be pain, and then you don't become hopeless.

[95:33]

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