I misplaced the list of people that wanted to meet in small groups next Monday night. There was three groups. One in Green... And there was one Marin County group and one San Francisco group. So, with the people that would be at Green Gulch next Monday night that would like to meet, raise your hands. Nobody at Green Gulch wants to? No, the people that live at Green Gulch that they want to meet next week. Change your minds? Change your mind. Okay. So how many people would like to meet at Green Gulch? 46 tonight, all right? Okay. I talked to Jerry Fuller this afternoon, and I told him that there's a class tonight and asked him if he wanted to say anything to the class about the koan or anything, and he said that he hadn't been studying it, so he didn't really have anything to say.

[01:14]

But then he started laughing, and I said, well, that's in the koan. There's a place in the koan where it says... if there's still someone who if there's still someone who laughs and then he laughed and said like that that's right said oh said will you tell those people that I want them to have an answer to this call on by tonight and that they can mail their answers to me room 505 Kaiser Centerfell But before you mail him, I want to see him. All right. So here we are. The introduction to this case is... Oh, by the way, this person, in this case, do you have your charts?

[02:26]

The person in this case, if you look at your chart... There's this sort of purple. Is that purple, that color? Is that color purple? What is that color? No, that's kind of, what is that color there? The Yunmen color. Handy? Purple is the color. So you go from Yunmen and you go down there and go take a left turn and go over there and you find Deshan Yunming. See that? Can you find Yunmen? You find yin-men at the top of the purple? Can you see the purple there? See the purple? You're laughing. Oh, some people think you're not laughing. Here, please. It's a light future. Okay, there's yin-men, so go down, turn left, take two boxes to the left there. See de-shan yin-ming? See it? That's the...

[03:29]

as the teacher of this case. Okay? Can you see? I don't have one. You never got one? No, I didn't get one. Discrimination against you. Excuse me? See? I was here. There he is in that box. You got a box. You got one. Where'd you get it? Here? Did you get it in this box? Yes. See? Oh, you came late. That's it. You came a week late or something, right? Yeah, see, that's the problem. We gave them at the beginning of the class. Do you have any more of these still, Andy? Beginning of next class, we'll have more. Okay, 10th century lived. Okay, so here's the introduction. This is called Deschamps' Complete Study.

[04:33]

The clear ground where there's not an inch of grass for 10,000 miles deludes people. The clear sky without a fleck of cloud in eight directions fools people. Even though this is using a wedge to remove a wedge, It doesn't prevent taking space and hanging it in space. A single mallet on the back of the brain. Particularly observe the appropriate technique. Did they give you goosebumps? The mallet did. The mallet did? Oh, we found some more. Okay. Okay.

[05:37]

Here you go, Arlene. What else do you need? Pass this to Walter. Okay, here's the case. The great master Yuan Ming of Deshan said to his assembly, when you get to the ultimate end, you just find the Buddhas in all times have their mouths hung on the wall. There is still someone who laughs. What was that again, Sonia? Laughter. One more, let's hear that again, a little louder.

[06:37]

If you know this one, your task of study is finished. This Zen teacher was a disciple of Yunmen, and he was the one, as it says in the commentary, who invented this expression of the three phrases of his teacher.

[07:45]

He said that whenever his teacher talked, whatever he said, there were like three phrases contained in his expressions. And then he says what they are here. They're containing the universe, cutting off all streams, and following the waves. Now, I don't know if it's the case that the disciple also was able to transmit these three levels and everything he said. But anyway, he proposed to his teacher. I always had these three aspects of his speech were always there. Yuen Man was... They said he never liked...

[09:02]

hit people or anything, or even yelled at them. But people always felt like he might do it any minute. Want to sit up here? Want to sit up here, Elmer? You want to be way back there? You are? Okay. Okay. And his speech was very, what to say, some people say that his way of, that his speech was like, like compared to like the Blitzkrieg, that he just very, that his speech was devastating, devastating to whoever he spoke to. And his statements were so, well, just, you know, really innovative and nothing like him.

[10:08]

No one talked like him before him. And it wasn't just that he was innovative. He somehow really could help people turn around. So here we have a teacher talking to his students in a similar, unusual way. So what do you think this is about, that when you reach the end of your study, the tongue of all the Buddhas is hung on the wall? What's that about for you? No more words to really explain anything. Just sort of be present. Just be present. Uh-huh. Yeah.

[11:12]

That seems pretty reasonable, doesn't it? It says their mouths hung on the walls. Is that the same as their tongues underneath their tongues? Yeah. Did I say tongues? Yeah. Which is much easier to picture than mouths hung on the walls. I don't know about your house, too, but... Yeah, tongues or mouth. Anyway, they're... I think it says tongues and I'm spying. I think it says tongues and I'm spying. I still have a little of this like facing the wall of your own mind so your speech would be coming from yourself.

[12:27]

Here. If you're practicing with a mind like a wall, then your speech comes from your wall-like mind. That's what you mean? Yeah. So, like, at the end of our study, it's like all the Buddha's tongues are on the wall, and so are our tongues on the wall. And then from the wall... there is a, you know, the tongue starts wagging from the wall, so to speak. From the wall, from the wall-like quality of the mind, the speech of the Buddhas arises. Well, you know, we should say that out of great compassion and the wall-like quality of great compassion, then speech arises. Yes.

[13:30]

Yes. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Right. Comfortable non-use. Yes. Is your name Reggie? Is your name Reggie? Joe. Joe. Where's Reggie? Okay, Joe. When you can't speak, you come to the ultimate end, that point where you go beyond words and thought. You may not speak anymore, therefore your mouth has to hang on the wall, because there is a distinction between words, thoughts, and things. And you cannot speak what reality is, but you can speak how reality is.

[14:31]

How reality is as truth and facts. So when you get to that distinction, that point, that ultimate end, where you can no longer speak, then you must paint your mouth on the wall. What you've got for experience cannot be spoken, cannot be thought, it's beyond thought. Think of the poem about the windmill. Yeah, there's a poem. The windmill is hanging in space, hanging by its mouth in emptiness. And no matter what direction the wind blows from, the windmill doesn't care. It just sings perfect wisdom. Yes?

[15:33]

Somebody's hand over there. Yeah, I was going to say that it says that Buddhists of all times have their mouths under the walls, so I was thinking also that the Buddhists They have some teaching, but then they thought, oh, well, I'm not going to do this with my mouth anymore. I'm going to just hang my mouth up on the wall and just be part of the wall. That's how I'm going to teach, not by my words. Yeah, Buddhists sometimes do that. But part of what I'm reading in this case is that when you, when one gets to this point of the end of your practice, whatever your practice is, take a practice, any practice you want. That's not the issue right now. But if you follow your practice to the end, at that point, the Buddhas don't have anything more to say to you.

[16:43]

But from that place, as we say, that place is not without speech. The tongues may be hung on the wall at that time. Reaching that point, the tongue may be on that wall, but the tongue can be reanimated. Is it that the Buddhas don't have anything to say to you, but through you? So that the two things, so that one thought throughout all of Buddha's identity stories? Well, you could put it that way. I think that the Buddhas will be able to speak through you in that way. But it seems to me that They're also saying, you know, that there's still someone who laughs.

[18:05]

Okay? There's still someone who laughs at that point. Now, it also says in the commentary that something like ten feet of explanation is not as good as one foot of practice. So, before we get any more explanatory footage here, let's have a few inches of practice. Does everybody have a practice? Does anybody here have a practice?

[19:09]

Is anybody here who doesn't have a practice? Is anybody here? Somebody laughed. We didn't get named. I requested a lot of time. On 5th May 1946, A monk said... On page 46? On page 46? On page 46. Of what book? Case 46. Oh, Case 46, yes. Aren't you going to ask? Yeah, I thought you said page 46. It is page 46, too. Okay. Case 46. We're on the same track. Case 195. It's not his number. Where is it?

[20:12]

Zalos said, you must be like a man who had other ways to be honest. And then the monk who was going there, then the monk who said, just die, don't live. So I have a question about whether this would be a good practice, just giving up, giving up, giving up, and not interspersing the giving up with a little pleasure and a little rest, and then trying to give up something else. And then... getting a little more pleasure and whatever, and just keep dying, dying, dying through all these distractions.

[21:18]

That struck me. I was wondering whether I would end up doing that. I would end up pretty grouchy and drooling all the time. You're wondering if you would? Why don't you try it and find out? I don't know what I want to try. Well, you don't have to. You shouldn't try something you don't know if you want to try. You should try something you want to try. What do you want to try? That sounds like an excellent practice, by the way, but it's not for me to talk you into it. Well, I'm just wondering whether I understood it as a possible practice. You got it. That's a possible practice. Anybody want to do that practice? Any recruits here for that one? Okay, I'll do it then. Okay, there's two of you. What? Okay, I will too. So let me know when you get towards the end of that practice, all right? And I'll check you out about the grumpiness factor. And if you are grumpy, guess what we'll do with that, Elmer?

[22:22]

Guess. Guess. Elmer. Elmer. If you get grumpy, what are we going to do about that? I'll just say where I am. Yeah, but what do you think we're going to do at that point? Just in case I'm not around. Die. Die more. Die in the grumpiness. Die in the grumpiness. Okay? Just in case that happens. It might. It might. Any grumpy people here tonight? Who? You? You're grumpy? Isn't that interesting. You don't look grumpy. What do you like when you look grumpy? You never know, you gotta ask. Now, is this, am I, are you doing, am I practicing dying?

[23:38]

You don't know, you gotta ask. I am, I'm practicing that. I thought that's what we were all practicing. Did you ask? Is that what we're all practicing? As far as they know, no. There are several other practices going on here besides that one. It's not necessary to practice that. What? It's not necessary to practice that. It's not necessary, but there's a lot of practices that aren't necessary that you might want to do. But it's not necessary, it's true. Most practices are really good practices, are practices which are just reiteration of what's happening. But you still have to make a commitment to some aspect of reiteration of what's happening. So does everybody here have a practice? Because we're not going to get any more explanatory footage yet.

[24:42]

Got to start practicing now. Did you say no, you don't have a practice there, man? What is your name? Rona. You don't have a practice? You want one? Sure. Which one do you want? Well, you want to practice mindfulness of your body? Can you feel your body? So now being mindful of that means that you continue to feel your body. What's happening with your body now? Tightened up. Tightened up? Where? Your knees are tight? Between your knees. Between your knees is tight. Anything else happening? No, that's good enough. That's fine. Now, I guess what you do now is you practice that, all right?

[25:43]

You practice continually being mindful of your body, body sensations like that. Your knee one's fine. If other ones come, you could also decide to pay attention to those. Or you could just concentrate entirely on knee sensation. That would be fine. However, I recommend that you give the whole body a chance and just meditate on the whole sensation, right? And do that practice, and do that practice exhaustively, which, in other words, your whole body. Do it exhaustively, all right? And you can start right now, and you might be able to do, we'll see if you can do it by the end of class. But exhaustively practice that. Anybody else have any other problems with not having a practice? You have any one? I can use a practice. You don't have one? No, no. Want to use the one she did? That would be fine.

[26:44]

Okay, you can have that one too. Okay. So now you're both being mindful of body as a practice. How's it going so far? Great. What kind of experiences have you had? My stomach also tightening up, as you asked me. Are you aware you're breathing, Rona? Yes. How's your breathing happening? Huh? It's okay. It's okay, you're aware of it? Yes. And how's your breathing? It's a little tight. A little tight too? But you can be mindful of it and aware of it still? Yes, okay. So should we go to the next case then?

[27:44]

Oh, before going to the next case, I just want to say that this case, to me, discussing this case doesn't seem to be... Unless you have some questions, discussing this case doesn't seem to be... until you have exhausted your practice. Okay? Because otherwise it's just hypothetical. Ah, we have some hands here. I think Sue was before Andy. Yes, Sue? Well, actually, I was going to say, what does it mean when you get to the ultimate end? How do we even know? How do you even know? How would we know that... Well, presumably we... Pardon? That's why I said let's go to the next case, because you all have your practices, unless you're just shy. You all have your practices now, and then we should just go on to the next case, because...

[28:58]

nobody seems to want to come forward with their expression of the one who's laughing. So since all of you, that's where you're at, whenever you want to talk about this case, I'll be here to hear about it. Is there some chance that we might actually get to the ultimate end? Is there some chance that you might actually get there? There is an excellent chance that you will get there, yes. In Hawaiian class? In Koan class? There's an excellent chance that you might get there in a Koan class on Monday night. Well, that was my question. That's my answer. And then Andy's next, and then the man with the mustache and the glasses is next, and then Arlene, and then John. Is that you, John? That was. Okay. Andy? Uh-huh. My clarification, it says your task of study is finished, so could an interpretation of ultimate end simply be when you address the end of your study, or are we talking certainly... Exactly the end of your study, it's the same thing.

[30:10]

End of your study, end of your practice, when you practice all the way to the end of your practice, or when you study all the way to the end of your study, then... That's it. Is a possible interpretation the end of your study but not the end of your practice? No. Oh, yeah, it's possible. Of course, you just did it. That was a perfectly possible and now realized interpretation. It's now had been registered in the interpretation files. But basically, that when you exhaust your practice, it doesn't mean that your practice is over. Doesn't mean you're not going to practice anymore when you exhaust your practice. Exhausting your practice means you do it completely. And you can do it completely in a moment and then start all over again in the next moment. And exhaust it again. You can exhaust it step by step, exhaust your practice. Or you can step by step not exhaust your practice. Okay? There's no end to practice. There's no beginning to practice. Practice isn't that kind of thing. Practice is not a kind of beginning ending thing.

[31:12]

But practice is something that can be done exhaustively. It can also be done half-heartedly, which is okay. But this case is about exhaustive practice, and it is necessary to do that. You understand? It's necessary to do your practice exhaustively. It's okay to do it not exhaustively, but that is not... finishing your job. Your job is to do your practice, the one that you've committed yourself to exhaustively, to do it completely, to give yourself completely to it. Okay? Then, Sue says something about how do you know or something, and of course, it's not a matter of knowing or not knowing. However, you do have a little helper there. Hey, Grace, there's a seat up here. There's one here and there's one over next to Craig. Oh, and there's Bob, too. There's a seat up here. So anyway, this is this kind of case, right?

[32:15]

I mean, really, let's just take it literally. This is about exhausted practice. And in exhausted practice, you don't have any time or energy left over to be knowing whether you're exhausting your practice or not. However, certain lazy people who are just sitting around waiting for you to come and demonstrate your exhausted practice, they can tell you. Want to sit up here, Bob? Elmer doesn't want to sit here. So, and there's another little thing, nice little thing that will happen is that at the place of exalted practice, there'll be somebody laughing there. Okay? There'll be somebody laughing. Now, will the person be laughing because they know? Or will they be laughing because they're laughing at themselves for knowing? Or will they be laughing because they used to know?

[33:18]

Or will they be laughing at the thought that they will know? The point is, anyway, we don't know exactly that part. We do have the information to know that they will be laughing and that there will be somebody there. Somebody will be there. And it won't be a self that's laughing. This will be a selfless laugh. A selfless laugh will be there when you exhaust your practice. Because you can't exhaust your practice and still have a self. You've got to take yourself and toss it into the practice. Self gives yourself to your practice. It's just practice. Exhausted practice. Throw your worries into your practice. Throw your concerns into your practice. Don't kill your worries. Don't kill your concerns. Just toss them into the old practice. And when you finish that, at the end of that, there will still be somebody there called, you know, somebody, called who, and that who can laugh.

[34:25]

And then bring your laugh to another who, see if they laugh back at you. And then you have confirmation of the conclusion of your study, and then you can really start to study. spread your wings, and create some wind. Okay, next. Well, actually, just dealing with my question, the nature of the lab, because there are haas and there are haas. Yes. Whether it was mockery or good spirits or something else. Haas? Yeah, what kind of spirit do you think this would be? From what I just said, if I... Huh? Would it be a good spirit? It sounds like an enlightenment. it would be an enlightened laugh. It would be a selfless, a selfless laugh. From, you know, a laugher, a person's got laughing equipment. So it's like a human, probably, perhaps a monkey, some kind of monkey, or a donkey, maybe a donkey, they can laugh, right? Hyenas, what else can laugh?

[35:29]

Puppies, can they laugh? Corpuses can laugh. So something that can laugh A selfless laugh. The point of exhaustive study is selflessness. John? You did it already. Did it? It's taken care of? Okay. Elena? This just makes me think, on Thursday during the session, in the early afternoon we were sitting and some people burst out laughing and We were just sitting, and I started to laugh. Yes. Because that's all that was there, was the laughter. And I struggled with wanting to go back to my sitting, and yet I completely felt the laughter. And I felt that that's what other people were feeling, was just that laughter. And then it all quieted down, but that's what... what I hear when you just said that was just, it was exhausted, it was exhausted and in that moment and then it went back to the sick again.

[36:42]

It wasn't that it was over, it just got to a point of exhaustion and it was hysterical in a way, and present, and present the laughter and then went back to continue the practice. So it didn't seem like there was an end, like there wasn't a beginning or an end. That's just how it should be. Where is the laughter now? Where is the laughter now? Did you exhaust your practice? No. Would you mind waiting until then? Before that?

[37:43]

He is more important. How's your body? Better, thank you. Are you enjoying this case? I'm enjoying the frogs. I'm enjoying the frogs. I asked you if you're enjoying this case. I opened the window. I was right there with the frogs. I know, but I asked you if you're enjoying the case. Yeah.

[38:46]

And how are you enjoying the case? I'm just taking them in. Listen. You hear the frogs? Yeah. That's how you're enjoying the case. Oh. Thank you. What? Thank you for letting me in on that. Do you understand the difference? Between... I asked you if you were enjoying the case. You said you were listening to the frogs. No, I said I was enjoying the case. You said you were enjoying the frogs. Okay. It's different to enjoy the case by listening to the frogs. See the difference? Don't you see it? Do you understand? Not yet. Listen, I say, are you enjoying the case? And you said, you're enjoying the frogs.

[39:50]

What you meant by that was, I'm telling you what you meant, excuse me, was you were listening to frogs, not, you're enjoying the frogs, not the case. Okay? But the way to enjoy the case is... And do you see the light beams coming out of his lamp? Coming into your eyes? Each light beam. Each ray of light coming into your eyes. Are you enjoying each one? Can you feel the caves coming in through each croak? This is also mindfulness of body, okay?

[40:57]

The sound of the frogs is your body. Do you understand? Your body. There's a poem by Shakespeare where he talks about all the effort, the struggle that we put into our lives.

[44:45]

And when it's all over, we can just burst into laughter. I'm not familiar with it. I just wonder if that's the same. You wondered at what? I wondered if that is the same person you laughed with. Well, from what I can get from what you're saying, it sounds quite similar. Do you feel this person? Who I feel? This person. Can you feel a little chuckle there? Been making an effort quite a while now, have you?

[45:47]

Yes. Anybody else been making an effort yet? I don't see it funny. You don't what? I don't see hanging a mouth on the wall funny. You don't? Neither do I. It doesn't say that hanging the mouth on the wall is funny. It just says that when you do your practice all the way, that the Buddhas will have their tongues hanging on the wall, or their mouth hanging on the wall at that time. Okay? And there will be somebody there who's still laughing. Or there'll be someone there who laughs at that time.

[46:50]

But they probably won't be laughing necessarily at the tongues or the mouth being hung on the wall. Pardon? Pardon? Maybe they was that for something else. Yes, probably for something else. It sounds like maybe that's the first time that how you've been talking about expressing yourself, maybe that's the time of absolute presence, and that's their expression. Right. Laughing is just one thing they might do, but... It's a favorite, kind of. It's a favorite form of expression coming from having forgot... It's a favorite expression of joy at having exhausted your practice.

[47:59]

It doesn't seem like a coincidence that it comes right after the mouths on the wall. I mean, you say words with mouths, and they hang with mouths on the wall, but they also clap with their mouth. And it seems like it's saying that when words are finished, there's still laughter. Yes, but also when words are finished, there's still words. Yeah. Yes. Yes. When you talk about exhausting your practice, is this something that is happening all the time, sort of like your practice begins and ends continuously? Well, yes, but I think in some sense what we mean by practice is not reality, but how you kind of like care for yourself in such a way that you appreciate and you realize reality.

[49:26]

In reality, everything's always complete and begins and ends completely. our practice is how we care for ourself in order that we understand and appreciate that. Somehow we seem to need to take care of ourselves in a way to reaffirm that way things are. And if we don't do that, even though it's true, most people don't realize this. They don't realize that everything is completely coming up and realizing itself and transcending itself. They don't realize that unless they practice. Mindfulness is part of what's the deal. In other words, what's the other part? Well, it's not really another part. It's just another aspect is total devotion. Which you could say, well, that's the same as real mindfulness.

[50:30]

Yes, right. So that will be included in mindfulness of your feelings. Yes. And total devotion to your feelings. When you have a feeling, you'll be totally devoted to experiencing that feeling. And when you yawn, you're totally devoted to the yawn. You exhaust the yawn. And you wake up as you yawn. Was there a new hand over there? Elmer, and then Maheen, and then Liz. Or maybe Liz, since she's a newcomer to this hand-raising thing tonight. Liz, would you stand up, Liz? Would you mind standing up? Would you please stand up at the end of your mind? Expose yourself a little there. It's just occurring to me that... No, stay standing.

[51:33]

Thank you for standing up for yourself. Mahi, would you like to say something? Would you stand up, please? I saw the same mouth as the other one. You saw the same mouth? Sorry, the Sioux, she saw the same mouth. You've seen this. I think it was the mouth of the one that was laughing. Oh, different. I think it was the mouth of the one. I think it was the mouth that was hanging and laughing. Could you show us that mouth?

[52:45]

Elmer? Elmer? Did you have it? I'm checking the clog. It needs a tongue, a jaw, and so forth. Yes. It's flat. You don't need any of those things. So it's not accurate to say that we both laughed and thought with our mouths. We can laugh... It's not accurate? ... without any lip movement. So I think it's an important distinction. I think it is too. Thank you. Yes. You know, all this talk of the mouth on the wall and flashing gargoyles, It may not be current, but it is. Thinking about a gargoyle, often the mouth is open, and sometimes there's image of fright, and sometimes there's a humorous image. Might there be some connection? There might be.

[53:47]

Could you please show us a gargoyle? Did you feel the connection there? Or speaking of gargoyles, So thinking about it in a more medieval way, might that be a mystic truth to a gargoyle that we're not aware of or we don't think about? No, no, we do think about that. We have a lot of gargoyles. in this stuff, yeah. Look at these other cases we were just studying about these gargoyle-like things, you know, dragons, which are often in medieval Asian, and maybe European too, dragons as part of, dragon-like gargoyles, and Garudas, you know what a Garuda is? Garuda's like a mythical gargoyle-like bird, you know, with a big dangerous snout and scales all over her chest and huge wings and tongs.

[54:55]

They eat dragons for lunch, you know. There are also decorations on various things and they're mythological and they're trying to gesture towards spiritual processes. I'm experiencing the connection between... Is your name Pat? You're fucking pretty good at this. Did you have... Did you have... See the gargoyle? Well, the thing is, I don't want to say this, but it's going to wreck it to say it. It's going to what? It's going to wreck it.

[55:56]

I mean, I have this fear that it's going to wreck it to say what I want to say. Oh, wreck it. The connection between, I've been sitting over here just quietly sobbing. And it is the most exquisite experience. It's like the laughing and this are the same thing. And my association to this, to that, is that the laugh is the sound of the universe. I'm sorry. The laugh is the sound of the universe, and there isn't anything that isn't in it. It's just... Good. A little exhaustion there. That's good. You have this kind of exhaustion. You've got to sob with your whole being.

[56:58]

And then the Buddhas can hang their tongues on the wall. It's hysterical. It's hysterical. Any other hysterical people here? Yes. Cripple stands up. She walks. She can walk. Well, what do you want me to do? I want you to stand up while you talk. Are you going to talk now? Well, I just think I exhaust my laughter. That's all we can talk about. That's my practice. Your practice is to exhaust your laughter? That's actually the most practice I do. Is laughing? Exhausting my laughter. And even when it's small.

[58:00]

That's right, it can be a very small laugh. These little tiny ones are good. Little tiny chirps. Oh, yes, I do. So I want this class to be a, what do you call it, practice class, a class where you In this class, you come in this class and you practice here and you realize exhaustion of your practice in this class. You know, my experience is that people work harder in the koans here than they do anyplace else during the week. Some people work on during the week too, that's nice, but most people work on the koans mostly in this class. This is where they really get into and, you know, feel what it's about.

[59:04]

So yes, you can exhaust him and then maybe you can carry that sense of thoroughness in working with these stories or working with yourself off the door for a little bit, a few feet anyway. You can understand something in this class. You can realize something in this class. Yes, sir. Right here. It can happen. That's the most important thing for me. And if you're working, other things can happen too. You can develop rapport with the ancestral material, which is about this topic, and utilize the resources of the tradition to again Realize your practice.

[60:07]

Like it says here, you know? Right in here, you know? This is about you. Yeah, that's what it's about in here. Sure enough. I don't know whose hand that is behind Craig.

[61:12]

Oh, it's Carol. Would you please stand up, Carol? There she is. It says, if you know this one, your task of study is finished. And I sort of took that to mean that moment by moment, your task is finished. So if it happens, and then your task is finished just for that moment, you know. Yes, your task is finished moment by moment, but your task is not finished even moment by moment if you don't know that one. A lot of people have moment by moments, but if you don't know this one, your task isn't done, you haven't finished your work. Liberation is accomplished moment by moment. But liberation is not relevant to a person who is not exhausting her practice.

[62:29]

Liberation is everywhere. There's no place where liberation isn't. There's no being that doesn't fully possess liberation. But if you don't exhaust your practice, it doesn't hook into your life, because you're not there at the place where the liberation is functioning. You have to exhaust your position in order to utilize the liberated, enlightened quality of your being, moment by moment. So each of you has a perfectly good liberation site right now. But you have to inhabit that site in order to receive the gift which comes to you by virtue of... by your own virtue. That's how... it's your own virtue. But you have to inhabit your virtue and take responsibility for your virtue in order to receive the benefits of your virtue.

[63:38]

Right? Doesn't that make perfect sense? But it's hard. It's very hard. Yes? No, I didn't actually. You can, though. It's a free country. No, I didn't want you to either. Isn't that funny that he thought I wanted to and the other people didn't know I did? And this is the Zen center, too. It's all perfectly fitting together now. That's what I want to talk about is the difference between Zen Center and the outside world. In terms of, like, laughter is like liberation in terms of seeing through the constructs of the mind.

[64:46]

I just sat Sashin and the things that were really, the insights that were happening at the end of Sashin and as it ended were, it occurred to me, I was talking about this with some people, they're the same insights that I recognized from when I was really depressed at various times in the last year or two. Yeah, like, how much... like how much hard work true practice is or for example how much anything I think is a construction of our mind sometimes that's really depressing but after Sashina it really made me smile and laugh because I've just done a lot of practice it reminded me of when I was in college I'd read existentialism or post-modernism about how all a person is, is, you know, receive constructed opinions. So I was like, well, that sounds kind of like Buddhism in a way. Except in Buddhism, it's a liberating thing, because we have practice.

[65:50]

And in postmodernism, it's just a really depressing, alienating thing, because they don't have practice. So, right after doing the sashi, that first... Does that make sense? Perfectly. Michael, how was the talk yesterday morning here at Green Gulch? Pardon? How was yesterday, the talk yesterday morning, how was that talk for you? You're the second person to ask me that.

[66:50]

My answer was, it was clear and simple. I had a friend with me who had never been here before and I said to myself, when I said to him, I said, well, there was a very succinct lesson in basic booze. What did he think? He was very... He was deeply moved. It had a dream that morning which was almost prescient for the talk and the service. Gathering in.

[68:09]

Holding closed the throat. Wind polishes. clouds wiped. The The commentator thinks that the wind is polishing a mirror and that the clouds are wiping the mirror.

[69:21]

The sound of the frogs are clearing the ears. The light from the lamp is clearing the eyes. The wind, the wind that blows away, you know, the eon, you know, the wind that destroys the eon polishes this mirror. The clouds that give rise to the eon wipe the mirror. What does it mean to gather in and hold the throat closed? What is that? What is that? Hmm?

[70:34]

It's mine. Hmm? It's mine. It's a joke. Is that being... What is this? That's it. Yeah. Sounds bad to you. The second line, gathering in, doesn't sound bad. The whole request to throw up sounds bad. That same line is in the introduction to case 37. It's the one that goes about too subtle to move the tongue on the wall. It's hard to laugh. Can't swallow.

[71:35]

Can't swallow it. Can't swallow it. Not creating objects. Not creating objects. Well, you pretty much got it there. These are the dynamics that you have to deal with, all these things you brought up. These are the winds that destroy and the clouds that give birth.

[72:46]

Good. Last time we saw those two symbols was in case 44, and the wind was the Garuda and the clouds were the dragon. Mm-hmm, right. Does that have any bearing on it? Yeah, I think it's, I think, yeah, definitely. The wind, the wind of the Garuda, the wind the Garuda creates has one function. and the clouds and the activity of the dragon plunging in the water and so on creates the clouds which go up in the sky and rain down. Both functions, both the destroying function and the giving birth function, we need them both, you know. We need the putting the tongue in the wall, hanging the mouth up in the wall, And we need the laughter. But you can't really have authentic, either one can't happen except by thoroughly exhausting.

[74:15]

The dragon won't come out of the water unless it's exhausted practice. And if it's exhausted practice, and the dragon comes up out of the water, and then if you can't handle that, you'll get helped. The Garuda will come in and destroy your excessiveness, will check you. Andy? I'd like to say that at the point of the exhaustive practice, there's a pivot. Yeah, there's a pivot. There's a pivot. It's a pivot where, for example, mouths get hung on the wall and where laughter erupts from silence. And speech comes forth without being thought of beforehand.

[75:19]

Usually, you know, speech is thought of beforehand. Karmic speech is thought of beforehand. In the rules of karma, first you commit mental karma, then verbal karma. But you can be free of that. You can speak without any deliberation. I shouldn't even say you can speak. There can be speech. Selfless speech. You read those three lines. I rewrote it. I'd like to read it. Okay. Turning the mind around, quietly explore, thought, study, practice, purifies. Could you say it louder, please? Turning the mind around, quietly explore, thought, study, practice, purifies.

[76:23]

And what three lines are those referring to? Gathering and holding close the furrowed wooden polish's clouds point. Could you hear her okay? Yes? Yes? Turning the mind around, quietly explore, thought, study, practice, purifies. So how are you folks feeling now? How are you feeling, Creighton?

[77:24]

Pretty good. You're pretty good? Yeah. How are you feeling, Clay? I've been sitting here. When I first took the call-in today, I struggled with it. And the more I sat here, the more I thought, I don't like it. You don't like the call-in? It's a lot about... setting something up. You know, I have problems with accepting and welcoming a friend, with thinking about a wall where all three of us come together simultaneously. And even that, there's this laugh, maybe not a cry or a shout, or just relaxing in the grass. And so, I've just been having problems. I'll tell what she's going through. Thank you.

[78:37]

Diana, how are things over there? You're a little tired. You're a little tired? Yeah, I... I wish we could have this class early in the morning. If you remind me about this, you know, next class, maybe we could have some class early in the morning just to see what it's like to discuss these koans like at five. Seven. You know, see what it's like to discuss them 5 o'clock in the morning, 7 o'clock in the morning, 8 o'clock in the morning, 9 o'clock in the morning, 10 o'clock in the morning. Try them at these different times. They're different at different times of day, you know. So I think this class goes pretty well considering it's a time when a lot of people are sleepy, but it would be nice for you to experience what these, like to work on these koans at other times of day because they're different, you know.

[79:46]

Most of you are studying these at this time. But if you remind us, maybe we could find a time maybe to get together some morning sometime. Or we could come. Just to see what it felt like. So please remind me how to find that. Okay, so now we have a couple weeks off until next class. And next time... I think we'll probably start with case 47, which is a famous case. This case, you know, stands waiting for somebody to respond to, right? This is a case about exhausted practice. We're not done with this case at all. But in some ways, I feel like there's not too much more to discuss at this time. But it's like an open invitation for somebody to come forth with something from this place where the Buddhas have... hung their mouths on the wall.

[80:49]

Meantime, we can move on to this famous story of Zhaozhou's cypress tree, sometimes known as an oak tree, in the courtyard. Okay? So please take care of yourself and exhaust your practice. May the force be with you.

[81:30]

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