I heard that one time someone said to the founder of Zen Center, who we call Suzuki Roshi, I do Zan, the person said. And Suzuki Roshi said, Something like, don't say that. Don't say, I took zazen. Today we have one day of sitting, or you could say we have one day of zazen. And so far it seems that each of us has made some effort to sit upright.

[01:23]

And we can see and hear, touch and think of the personal effort that we have made today and are making now, but not we are making our personal effort. The zazen of the Buddhas and ancestors includes each of our individual efforts, one by one. The zazen of the Buddhas is the conservative activity

[02:52]

of all of our individual efforts. Ichigo Uda Buddha's zazen is the same practice of each of us and all beings. I may be able to see and hear my own effort, and I may be able to see your individual effort. In a way, I do see my individual effort, and I do see individual effort.

[04:02]

The Buddha's zazen, which we also call sometimes self-receiving and employing, concentration of receiving and employing self is another name for Buddha's zazen. That zazen of Buddhas and ancestors completely includes our individual efforts. And that zazen is the way, the Buddha way, which is the same practice as each of us and all beings. Now zazen, again, is the concerted activity of all beings.

[05:13]

It is the concerted activity. It is the same activity of the azimuths the way that your individual effort includes the whole universe, and the way the whole universe includes each of our individual effort, that is Buddha's... That is Buddha's practice. It is both individual and it is social. And it is beyond hearing. It is not within reach of feelings or discrimination. It is the reality of the entire universe.

[06:15]

So here she says, don't say you can do zazen. However, you saying that you can do zazen is completely included in zazen. Today, I think, a new service will do a chant of a text written by the ancestor Dogen called Self-Perceiving and Entwined Sublimity. And in that text it talks about zazen and the same practice as the individual and all beings, and the same awakening as the individual and all beings.

[07:31]

And it also says that it is the unfolding of great wisdom and true dharma. It is the reality of the working of the whole universe. One day I gave a talk And I said that I assert, I believe that I am sitting in the center of all sorrow, of all beings. I imagine that. I think that. I believe that. This is my testimony.

[08:36]

And I believe that you are sitting at the center of all beings. And the reality of your life is that your sitting in the center of all beings is that you are sitting at the center of all beings, and you are giving yourself to all beings, and all beings are giving themselves to you. All suffering beings are giving themselves to you, and you are giving yourself to all suffering beings. In reality, this is our life as generosity. This way that I'm giving myself to all beings, that all beings are giving themselves to me, is beyond hearing and seeing.

[09:45]

And it's beyond me saying that this is the way we're living. And yet, these words are expressions of it. Words do not bridge it. But it expresses itself by these words. These words hold up the banner of this sin. We sit and we make the individual effort to raise the Dharma flag of Buddha-sowsing. Instead, in reality, we are flowing into and onto all beings, and all beings are flowing into and onto us. That's reality.

[10:47]

However, if we do not practice that generosity, if we don't allow for our own giving to others and then giving to us, we may miss it. even though it's completely true, unceasingly. This is not impermanently, it's an unceasing practice of generosity at every place in the universe. And this generosity unifies the individual and all beings. and unifies all beings and the individual. Or maybe rather than unifies, it is the unity of all beings and the individual.

[11:53]

And joining the practice of generosity at your seat at the center of the universe, that practice realizes this unity. which is unceasing, unthinkable, unnameable, unstoppable, unreachable, and unavoidable. In Buddhism, some scholars say that the early Buddhism was not metaphysical. The early Jins were not metaphysical, they say. But the teaching I've been telling you about is metaphysical.

[12:55]

Bodhisattva practice is both psychological and metaphysical. In Buddhism, the Buddha emphasised psychological teachings about individual psychology. The relationship among all individual psychological beings is metaphysical. We can't see the relationship. We can see our own individual psychology, and our individual psychology can practice metaphysics. Which is an unpopular, or you could say, not very often mentioned word in Zen history. But Dogen gave metaphysical teachings.

[14:11]

The way that your practice is the same as all beings' and the way all beings' practice is the same as yours is a metaphysical process of Jnana-Nirvastava in both directions, unceasing. There's giving of that thing to all things and all things given to this thing. So it is appropriate for our psychological life that we attend to each psychological moment. And let that individual, present, psychological moment be a gift to every person, animal, tree, mountain, river, ocean, sky, earth that we eat.

[15:28]

And let all those things be gifts to our psychological being, which they already are. This teaching does not rise and does not cease. These words rise and cease. they laughed at the thought of the following sentence.

[16:54]

The sentence is, Fully vaccinated people are invited to speak if they wish. If you're not fully vaccinated, you have to go outside and speak. And if you wish to speak, I encourage you to remember that your speech is a gift to all beings. And all beings flow onto you generously so that you can speak. Reverend Mayer.

[18:07]

I believe you said that something like each psychological moment is a gift to the universe? In reality. What about some psychological moment such as I eat all those people? That is a gift to the entire universe. If you have a moment of psychological ill will, it is a gift to the whole universe. And also, at that moment, the whole universe generously flows into and onto that psychological ill will. In realizing the given, there is liberation without getting rid of the ill will.

[19:11]

And there is peace and harmony in the relationship between that ill will and all beings. And also, if you happen to have a Buddha sitting near you, and you told the Buddha about your ill will, the Buddha might say, if you have ill will, you're not my disciple. And when Buddha says that, Buddha is, you are. Give yourself to Buddha, and Buddha is giving herself to you. Mutual generosity is the Buddha way. And in that, you and Buddha are free of the ill will. However, unattending your will without attending it, without being present with it in the process of giving, it's really painful and uncomfortable.

[20:44]

However, without pain and harm, when attended to generously and remembering the teaching These are liberated from that pain and suffering of ill will. Buddhism has not been able to eliminate ill will in this world, but it is constantly jabbering, tasting ill will in a world of great suffering. We are surrounded by ill will. It's all around us. Here is practice that can join, that can be allowed, that can be asserted, that can be believed at the center of oceans of ill will and in oceans of good will.

[21:56]

Do you have a gift to give to us? Perfectly. I couldn't quite hear your question. I didn't hear your question. Do you have a gift, do you have something to say, a verbal gift to give to us in response to my approach? My heart is trying to expand a little bit. Yes, your heart is trying to expand. And all beings are supporting your expanding heart. Thank you for your offering. Is that Qadir?

[23:10]

That's good enough. Yes? You are not my disciple. Doesn't sound like giving or generosity to me. Right, it doesn't. But I'm saying, in reality, everything that we do is a gift. And sometimes a good gift to say to you. Being cruel is not... Please do not be cruel. If you're cruel, you're not my disciple. The Buddha very well might say that. But this is the Buddha's gift to that person. This is the Buddha's teaching to them. The Buddha is basically just giving teaching. Teaching, teaching, teaching, teaching. Gift, gift, gift, gift. And one of the gifts is, this is not the way I would like you to practice. And if you practice this way, you're not my disciple.

[24:15]

This is teaching. This is the Buddha's gift. And the Buddha gives that teaching with great love and compassion. If you're going in the zendo, you're intending to go in the zendo, but actually you're going to the toilet. That's not the zendo, that's the toilet. And that's Buddha's gift to you, right? And if you're walking into ill will, the Buddha wants you to know, ill will's not where my disciples go. However, me telling you what I say to my disciples. Buddha probably wouldn't say to someone who wasn't studying with the Buddha, the Buddha probably wouldn't say, you're not my disciple. This is something Buddha says to the children of Buddha.

[25:17]

Not a gift. But I'm saying, I see it that way. And that's my gift to you, is I see the Buddha giving, giving, giving, even when the Buddha says, you're not my disciple. How about that? What do you say to someone who isn't a disciple? Say it louder. What do you say to someone who isn't their disciple? What were you saying? Yeah. Well, in that case, you would say, you're not my disciple. That's what you were saying. They're not his disciple. They wanted to be his disciple, right?

[26:22]

So either somebody who is or wants to be the Buddha would give that instruction about what a disciple is like. So somebody who's not a disciple, somebody who does not want to study with Buddha, Buddha might... How are you today? And yeah, that's what the Buddha might say. And the person might say something, and the Buddha might respond. And the person might really appreciate the way Buddha responded. And then the person might say, could I be your disciple? And the Buddha said, okay. And the person might say, can I be your disciple even if I fail well?

[27:28]

And the boy would say, no. You can be my disciple, but you have to give up your will. It reminds me of something funny that happened one time here in this valley. One of the people who was serving as an attendant during Sashin, like this, well, maybe you don't answer the telephone, but during a break, he checked his voicemails. He went home and he heard telephone ringing. He picked it up and answered it. And it was someone trying to sell him a credit card. And after the person talked for a while, the person who resided here asked the person, Do you have to make a certain amount of money to get a credit card?

[28:32]

And the person said, Yes. And he said, Well, How much money do you have to make? And the person told her, I don't make that much. And she said, well, where do you live? And he explained to her where he lived and what this place was like. And she said, can I kind of live there? And he said, yeah. And then she said, can you live there? And he said, well, yes. There's a lot of ways away from the central area. It isn't long. So... You know, you can't smoke from the center. But that's a gift to you, and other people. I wonder if the sound could be turned up a little bit. Turned up? And there's another story which I heard.

[29:35]

So the Purusha had two main teachers. One was his original who he lived with for many years. And then after his teacher died, he studied with another teacher whose name was Kishizawa Iyan. And Kishizawa Iyan had a teacher whose name was Nishida Boksun. And one day, Nishiya Boso said to Kishizawa, you're not my disciple. He talked to his beloved disciple and said, you're not my disciple. The teacher said to the disciple, you're not my disciple.

[30:39]

And Gisela said, well, why not? He said, because you're all involved in important situations. If I'm going to the toilet, for example, you don't bother me. See, you're not my disciple. So there again, the teacher gave the student an idea of a teaching. But I started the office saying, you're not my disciple. And then, funny how, what, all you could have done the process went on. And he was his disciple. Also, one time, Sakyongkara, she said, a group of people, as I said, most of you did not have the conviction or commitment to the practice that we're doing here. So you probably should leave. Go away. He didn't say that out loud, he said it once. He said, go where he is, come back.

[31:43]

When you have that kind of commitment. So there's this dynamic process of giving and receiving, and it includes And it's hard for us to remember every moment. But that's what our training is for, is to remember the process of giving at the center of the universe, which realizes the limits of individual practice and the practice of all games. What time is it? Quarter to one? Anyway.

[32:44]

The 11th. The 11th. Anything else that you wish to bring up? I hope God's trying to get my attention to point to somebody. Who are you pointing at? Sangha. Sangha. Universe. Yes, Sangha, regular Sangha. Speaking about zazen, I don't do zazen. Zazen just means When these words came to my mind, I wanted to see what it meant.

[33:45]

Zazen is the complete integration of our body, speech, and mind without showing up without the intention to see. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So all beings includes all the beings that make up you, all your attentions and all your physical, emotional, and verbal, and mental activity. All those are beings too, who are getting to each other. Incentivity and intention and showing up with intention and vow.

[34:49]

and also not showing up with no intention and no vow. Those are also beings which are working together and getting to each other. But all the things he said, working together, is the other. And things that aren't in the way are also working together. the way the whole universe is working together with the integration of the example here, because beings who are not like you, who don't have your vows and so on, but your vows are given to them, and they give them so. You're talking about that they you're pointing to is awesome also? They are awesome, yes. They are awesome too. They are the same practice as your practice, and the way your practice works, and there's this thing that you've got yourself.

[36:02]

Is it that they're completely expressing themselves? Is that what you're... If they feel it, they're not expressing themselves. For example, they feel a closed heart. Their closed heart is a gift to all of us, and we are giving to them who have closed hearts. Are you being an assassin? No. Are you being an assassin? The way we're practicing generosity, the people who do not want to practice asana, and the way people who do not want to practice asana are giving to us asana. The people who do not want to be bodhisattvas are giving themselves to us right now, at the center of the universe.

[37:06]

And we are giving ourselves to all beings who do not want to be bodhisattvas. And also we're giving ourselves to all beings who want to be sattvas. And all beings who want to be sattvas are giving themselves to us. Even if they want to be sattvas and you don't want to give to us, they're still giving to us. And the way that they actually are is zazen. And the way that they actually are with them is zazen. Including people don't want to practice zazen. That's a gift to the universe. And the universe supports us to not want to do zazen. I've never experienced this thing called not wanting to disaster. But sometime in the future, I don't want to disaster.

[38:11]

I don't want to keep. I don't want to practice ordeal. One time at the Zen assembly I said, I just want to confess to the assembly that I hate ordealty. It's not really not what ordealty is, by the way. What it is? Raise your hand. Wow. Wait a second. OK. One person did. Thank you. I think you're not the only one that failed or maybe embarrassed. Odeoke is the name, the Japanese name for a formal meeting, which we have once a year. It's one of our formal practices, which we give to Zen. And one day someone said, she was sitting right over there.

[39:12]

Wonderful. She loved to sit, but she hated to sit. Some people like, you know, she hated to sit. What I'm saying to you is, Vaza is the way all the people who hate Odiyoki are giving themselves to us, and we're giving ourselves to them. And how we're actually doing unseasoned in reality. Okay? My understanding is that blackness is a property, but white rock age is not. yet fully aware of love.

[40:15]

So by this fully aware of love, they still act fully aware of love. Is that very understanding? Yeah. No, actually, I understand that. Did you just give me a gift? Did you just give me a gift? When you said no, was that a gift? That gift was a gift. Well then, A couple of nights ago, I was speaking on a close family number about Israel and Palestine.

[41:28]

And he said, even a lot of progressive Israelis have given up on peace. And I responded, I said, people never give up on peace. And I wonder, is it enough to wish that to be so? Is it enough to wish that to be so? Yeah. I would say wishing that to nature is, at that moment, you're a gift. And wishing can be accompanied by at that moment.

[42:41]

Because wishing is also, it isn't just a wish, it's a gift. If you wish for peace, It's a wish that all beings are working on. I think your wish is for the album. But also, it's good to remember that your wish is a gift, so that your wish is... you realize the unity of the wish and the album. Your wish isn't just a wish. It's a wish... is a wish... for reality, which you wouldn't dare to wish for. And so a lot of people have felt it's just too painful to wish for under some circumstances. They're just too painful for it.

[43:44]

But that's their gift. used me when I supported him to not be able to wish for it anymore, because it's so painful. And that's part of the suffering. That must be my way. Equally extensive with the true merit of Buddha's way. Beings are numberless, I vow to end them. Delusions are inexhaustible, I vow to end them.

[44:51]

Dharma gates are boundless, I vow to end them. Buddha's way is unsurpassable. I vow to become.

[45:10]

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