Just a moment ago there was a tendency to put my hand on this chair and lean on it. But I'm not going to do that. I mean, I'm trying not to lean on anything. I usually don't feel like I want to lean on anything, but just now I felt like I kind of wanted to lean on this. So we caught the bull. The bull caught us. And we didn't really discuss training the bull yet, did we? We talked about number five last time.

[01:10]

We did a little bit. So we've got the bullet. And there was some question about whether we need to use the whip and the rope. So it says anyway, it's kind of dynamic, it says, again, I was going to lean on this thing here a little bit. But I don't want to do that, really. I want to stand up on these feet. There's nothing wrong with leaning on these, it's just that it's very important for me to stand on my feet. If it would help you for me to lean on things, let me know.

[02:14]

I think part of the problem now is to not lean away from this bull. You don't have to... It's okay. You don't have to look at the news to see the book. You've got it. I have it. Don't you have it? Isn't it with you all day? I'll stop there. Isn't it with you all day? And it's a challenge to be present with it and not turn away from it. Isn't it? If you stay with it, so much is going through you, right?

[03:16]

As a matter of fact, I think part of what we have to watch out for is just looking outside, maybe for it, or thinking we have to look at something other than deal with what's happening to us. If somebody asks us to, fine, but most of the time we've got this thing, it's with us now. Isn't it? And then, so a big part of our job is like to be patient with it and energetic with it. That's kind of like catching it. And I think that the bull is I think the bull is asking us to stay with it. And it's asking us to use the whip and the rope. It's not like we're imposing this.

[04:28]

The bull wants us to use something. It's ungovernable, right? It's ungovernable, and yet it wants us to relate to it. And it's hard for us to stay with it. I'm saying that to you, but... Is that how it is for you? Stay with it, and it's with you all day. And if you start moving a little bit quickly, or talk quickly, maybe you lose track of it for a while. And then if you hold, if you don't lean on anything, If you don't go someplace else to look for it, if you don't start talking about it, then you realize, oh, it's still here. It never went. It never really did go away. This thing about it strutting up the plateau into the mist, that isn't it going away.

[05:39]

That's part of it. It's got this big function. It's part of its uncontrollableness, and we've got something uncontrollable that's with us. And I could have said this last week, but now I think it's clearer, isn't it? So one way to understand the fifth picture now, today, the fourth picture is that we're patient with how difficult this powerful being is. It's so powerful. It's so ungovernable. And it's so challenging. And also, it's calling for us. It wants us to interact.

[06:39]

But it kind of, excuse me, I'm really powerful, I'm sorry. I can be almost anything. Sorry, but please stay with me. And then comes the sixth, fifth picture. Tonight I feel like the fifth picture is like, we're patient with it, we're patient with the bull, we're diligent, and we're courageous, we're energetic, we want all this that's going on in this life. We don't want to be looking at the newspaper and the media We don't want to do that to distract ourselves from this thing we've got to work with. We don't want to. We might. And I'm running into part of my working with the bull is working with people who are telling me they're getting distracted from the bull by talking about it and thinking about it.

[07:54]

And then they're getting I think energy, if we don't sit upright with this bull, if we run away from this bull by talking about it too much, it could deplete us. But that's not the end of the story. We can recover our energy by giving up and coming back to be with the bull and realize we want to do that. We don't want to run away from what's going on with us. And then the next picture, I think, is kind of like really settling down with it. After being clear that we talk to ourselves. We can talk to people, but we can notice if the talk is taking us away. And it seems like the external world is saying, hey, look over here. But we've already got the bull. Nobody else is going to tell us what it is.

[08:59]

But They can be included in it. But we shouldn't skip over what we've already got to look at that, to bring that in to your current, to what you're working on. Then you can bring it in, but you probably don't need it. And people... So you just include it. Don't lean over. Don't use that up stuff. Stand up and sit around. Last Monday night, I thought we were going to just settle down like that and be able to ride the boat. Once we really settle with it, then we can ride it. But now I realize that I was underestimating how challenging it is to settle with it. So it's okay if we spend the rest of the class just settling and never get to writing at home until we settle.

[10:17]

And we can work on settling right now. And we can talk. Like right now I can talk with you and I can distract myself from the bowl by talking to you. or I can stay connected to the bull while I talk to you. And I might be able to catch, or you might be able to catch me leaning away from contact with this thing, this huge, powerful, wild, ungovernable reality that's calling us to interact with it. become tamed with it. It's hard to be tamed. It's hard to be tamed and it's hard to have a taming relationship with what's going on.

[11:21]

So leaning on this bench, this platform or this chair, That's part of the bull. But I'd rather deal with that like this. My body into a cup, acting it out. I'd like to recognize that part of the bull by standing up. It's still there. The leaning is still there. I'd like to get rid of it. That's what I like for startups. Yes. I think I probably have a different relationship to Lisa Brents than most of the people in the room.

[12:24]

But I was still... Anyway, today I was... coming back from Mill Valley during lunchtime after helping someone. And there was the public broadcast radio station on, and I switched it on. And they were carrying Obama's press conference line. And I've never got the Obama thing. I never quite understood what seemed like adulation for him. But listening to that, I got it. I was really moved by his

[13:28]

his humanity and his grasp of the situation. I think it's the first time I've ever heard a politician being control and compassionate about a situation, including his compassion for the president-elect. And I think The reason I'm saying this is I think that we're not alone with this bull. There's more than just this bull for this time. be upright with what's happening.

[14:39]

It would be possible for something other than what seems to be a great fear coming to pass. This not being alone that you spoke of, that's part of the bull. And Mr. Obama, I think he actually wants the next president to wake up. He doesn't want him to be more and more diluted and cause harm. Wake up.

[15:43]

So that would be good for everybody. Mr. Obama doesn't seem to want to increase the... I think he knows about it and then he feels it. I think he wants to be upright with it. And I think he has done that. He's been quite upright with the fear that's been going on all along. Somebody said, he didn't do anything. He just showed the way. So, we may not do anything to show the way, the way to be upright with the book, to be upright with how we're all together.

[16:49]

That might be what we show. And many people will come to us now having trouble being upright, and we can uprightly receive that symbol. And we can have also many feelings that will come from in us, and we can be upright with what's flowing through us and what people are bringing to us. Yes? Where does the idea of the word resilience fit in, or does it? The word what? Resilience. Resilience? I think that the... thick picture about developing resilience. We can settle with this ball. We can stop, you know, we have energy now to deal with it.

[17:56]

And if we can use that energy to settle with it, enthusiasm to Let it train us, and us train him. We want it to train us. It wants us to train it. We have enthusiasm for this training. And if we settle into this, the resiliency will come. The flexibility. The relaxation. which will lead us to then again go back and refresh and recreate our enthusiasm in the face of others and our own challenging process.

[18:59]

So today, part of my time was receiving challenging information. I could give it various names, but anyway, it was difficult material. And I felt kind of like, good, this is the book. that's got me right now, and I've got it. And I'm happy to not run away from it right now. I'm happy, I'm joyful to not run away from depression, to not lean for support when I have legs to hold me up, to use them. Yes.

[20:34]

There was just a divine agent of the... This was a cult of non-bull dancers who danced with the bulls in this labyrinth as a religious ritual. The cult of the bulls and the dancers and dancing in the labyrinth. There's a New Yorker cartoon that shows this boy with a suit on, and he's got a little button on his chest, and the button says, See me about mazes. No, he says mazes. See me about mazes. You know, like at a store when they have these buttons? About, you know... Maybe I'll show you something historic.

[21:37]

The bull is going to show us the labyrinth. Yes. I'm not entirely convinced how you say that the bull wants us to track with it. It's sort of It seems like the world maybe just isn't resisting, but it's us who want to or don't want to. I didn't say the world would be resisting. No, I don't. I guess it's the want indicates like, I feel like... will allow us, it's like, it doesn't necessarily have or need a want.

[22:48]

It's going to let us want to come into it or want to step away from it. It's sort of the job wants. I just don't know. You say, you think it's supposed to be our wants? Yeah, and I guess I was not really convinced that it has a want of its own, so I was wondering if you could explain how you know that. It doesn't have a want of its own, and neither do we. Our wants are not our own wants. Our wants are the bull's wants, and the bull's wants are our wants, which, like you said, doesn't have any wants other than ours. So if we don't want the bull, then the bull doesn't want us. Right. We don't want the bull, and it seems that the bull doesn't want us. That's like maybe back earlier in the story.

[23:49]

But now anyway, these things that were coming up in me today, definitely I really felt not to go away from them. I thought they wanted my attention. I mean, they came to me. Yeah. They presented themselves to me. Was that because it's sort of a neutral one, because you have to watch The thought, you could say, went out of its way, itself, to me, today. And now you just went out of your way to present yourself. And I think you asked me to pay attention to you.

[24:56]

What is it that people want me to pay attention to? I think you called for me to pay attention to you, and I'm happy to do so. What do you think? Do people want me to pay attention to you? We don't know? Well, I don't think I'm going to not pay attention to your show. I don't think I'm going to do that. Yeah. I think we want people to pay attention to us, to give us attention.

[26:02]

I think we want people to support us. I think we want everybody to support us. But we don't necessarily know that. And I think everybody wants us to support them. But we may not know that they do, and they may not know that they want it. But that's what I think is another way of talking about this. That this big, ungovernable thing is in our life now, and if we respond appropriately, it can step on our foot to get our attention. I'm going to say that this big thing that's happening is calling for our compassion. And starting with pay attention, give attention to it.

[27:07]

And then see if you can practice all the perceptions with it. See if you can be generous with it, careful of it, patient with it, intelligent with it. And I think, in a way, Here's a story. We've done enough of that, so now we have this gift of this huge thing to take care of. And it wants to stick. It presented itself this way because we were ready for it. And now we're ready for this difficulty. And part of me wants to lean on something, whether we need it. My own two feet. and be ready to be, because it wants me to be, because I am. Again, Mr. Obama

[28:27]

to be friendly. Not everybody, even though he's also differences of opinion and so on. But he actually was friendly. And the president-elect could see that it was an honor to be with him, and that he was a good man. I read his words and listened to him speak, and I didn't strike him with this good passion. Mr. Obama? Yeah. What did he strike you with? He struck me as the same person who, a week earlier, was warning the country that this person is a danger to all of us.

[29:36]

And I looked at him, and I was misogynistic, etc. Explicitly. And I think if he ever believed that, as I do, then he would... I don't think he would be so... He could still be polite, but I think there is a time and place. Now, maybe I'm not going to show up for any ceremony. Maybe I'm not going to say, let's give this person who I have been working month after month, week after week, telling you that this is danger, that this person is not worthy of this office.

[30:43]

I think that it would be more compassionate to, if he believed that ever, to not change that position within hours of something like what should happen. Are you calling to me? Are you calling to my attention? I know you did it before, but now I'm asking you. I'm happy to give it to you, and I actually did give it to you. I was happy to give it to you. Now that you've got my attention, don't you care what they just said? Yes. It's a question.

[31:46]

Do you think that Mr. O'Long was compassionate when he said, I think this person is dangerous. Do you think that was compassionate? I think it might have been. Yeah, I think it might have been, too. I don't know if it was, but I think you can set it. This is dangerous. And be compassionate to who you're talking to. and to let you point to it. So I feel that to say that you don't think somebody's qualified to ride a motorcycle to Alaska, I think you could say that compassionately, or you could say it on... or in contradicting the bodhisattva vows. You could say it as slander, or you could say it as a kindness to the person you're talking about and anybody who was thinking of riding with him.

[32:55]

So I don't know. That was coming from him, really, and compassion for the whole situation and everybody in it. But it could have been. And then you can say, the next day after people, kind of some people don't listen to you, and give him a vehicle. After you told him you didn't think it was a good idea, and you decide, then the caution you do is not now make everybody really terrified and violent. Under the circumstances of people not listening to you and doing the same things at a whole different level, but now maybe another kind of compassion comes, which is a different form. But then, the next day, the compassion could be, I'm not going to attend the ceremony. I don't know what form the bodhisattva activity will take.

[33:59]

That's why we have to look in ourselves and see, am I pointing out somebody's shortcomings to protect all beings, and to liberate beings, or am I doing it so that people will, you know, care less for this person, and disrespect this person, and discount... And I'm actually saying, I'm pointing out a shortcoming in order for everybody to come and help the person, not be dangerous, and not do harm. That's my reason for pointing out the shortcoming. And I really... Yes, you know, just like, it involves to lean on this when I don't really need to, but just kind of like a weakness of just doing my job of standing here. I also, there's like, all around me there's these little pits. Like one of them is ill will. It's like around me all day long. Sorry, it's right there.

[35:02]

And if I start leaning towards it, I catch myself most of the time. I don't like, I don't harbor it. but it's right nearby. And I could say, I could say, I do not support this, I disagree with this, this person's not qualified. And I think you could also say, I thought this person was not qualified, I still think so, but I also respect that... If a bunch of people choose somebody who's not qualified, we go with the democracy program. We don't kill the books. No, but I think there are some differences. Differences between what? Well, if the guy that said we are no longer going to let Jews into the country, or if he said we're no longer going to let black people into the country,

[36:08]

I think the response would be different. But because it was other groups in this current situation... Let's see what he does. I think there's some point at which somebody says, well, as much as I'd like to give you the benefit of the doubt, what you have said and done already is enough for me to say, politely, perhaps, I don't want in your incarnation, or whatever it is. And I think if this person had targeted different groups than he has targeted, then Obama's response might be different. Yeah, maybe. But I think right now it's more acceptable to go after the groups. I didn't follow the correct of the groups in the department. Well, Muslims, Mexicans, Frenchmen still have... I don't know what you mean.

[37:09]

I don't know what you mean by go after them. Who's going after them? The president will let... I thought you were talking about Obama. Yes. Obama was faced with somebody who, instead of picking on... Muslims and Mexicans have explicitly said, no more Jews coming into the country, no more black people. I don't think Obama says, you know, he'd worry, and let's just... I don't wish him the best. You're right. I don't know. I don't know what he would do myself. So you would bet on that? That that would be different? Yeah, I would bet on that. And you might be right. If I'm talking about Whatever he says, whatever I say, is coming from compassion. And I'm the first judge of that. If I think it's not, then I'm saying, I don't want to deal with this bull.

[38:10]

And if I think it is, then I need you to think it's not. And I... Sometimes I think Mr. Obama's coming from compassion, and I haven't seen him not. But still, that doesn't mean he isn't. It starts here, the deep feeling like, when I feel ill-will toward anybody in a neighborhood, I can spot ill-will. And then I can spot whether I'm going to go dwell in it. I can spot that in myself. So I don't want to be guessing about other people's compassion practice. And if I do, then I want to realize that that guessing is something for me to practice with, not actually try to prove it.

[39:20]

But I'm open to that anybody might sometimes lean away from listening with compassion completely, and looking with compassion completely. I think I sometimes lean away. And if I don't, I don't know what I will do, and I might I might do a lot of different things. I might support somebody or not support somebody. I might go to a ceremony or not go to a ceremony. But I felt kind of... engage with you just now, and I felt like trying to get away from you. Wonderful.

[40:23]

Yeah, as always, I appreciate that. Yeah. And I appreciate you offering that to me, saving me a telephone call. Thank you. Now, is that hand coming from you, Chuck? Yeah. Just in addition to the role of an elaborate advancing with it, I saw what looked to me like and or Bodhisattva action on a live broadcast yesterday. I found very moving. It was Michael Moore, the filmmaker who actually predicted this outcome, from his own compassionate connection with people of the Middle East. And he somehow was making this effort to, he went in, he managed to, with everybody's help and not causing any problems, walk into the front tower and get up all the way to the left.

[41:40]

floor, where the Secret Service were protecting the elevators, because he wanted to talk to Mr. Trump. And along the way, people were talking to him about, oh, you predicted it so great, you know, I'm not happy I predicted it. And then he said, for the end of what I watched, that it was his intention to meet with Donald Trump and convince him not to take office. And that is so ridiculous. And then I thought, but that's what the police talk about. It's utterly ridiculous. And he was so kind to everybody he met. And the Secret Service was nice to him. The Trump employees were nice to him. He talked with people who had voted for Trump. And they had conversations, of which he didn't back away from his own perspective. He was very kind. I mean, I was just amazed. at this. And I got there to talk to him, but he said he was just going to keep trying.

[42:45]

And he left notes and, you know, like it was just this focused, kind action, you know. I aspire to that. Yeah, I do too. I do too. Yes. I keep getting this image of this Dharma talk. I attended yours last year, and I don't remember much of it, but I remember you saying, like, when you have this thing, you must take care of it. It's like coming in with the bowl and all of this conversation. Maybe it's not... I think that's how you're interacting with the bull is like taking care of it and really in these times it's really easy to freak out and not take care of it and in turn you may have to search for it again and feel alone and feel fearful and guilty and all kinds of emotions when you're like not taking care of the

[44:04]

It may be that what you're referring to is you're talking about one of our songs called the song of the precious degree of samadhi. It starts off by saying the teaching of intimate transmission, Buddhas and ancestors, allow you to have it, so keep it well. But the teaching of suchness is not the bull. It's how to relate to the bull. And this teaching has been given to us. The Buddhas are intimately communicating to us, and they're telling us how to relate to the bull, which is not the teaching of suchness. Maybe I shouldn't have said that. So, intimate transmission has already been given to us.

[45:13]

And intimate transmission sings us a song that says, please take care of... So, take care of the bull, but also take care of the teething pot, take care of the bed. And so his various instructions, don't turn away from the ball, and don't touch it. It's not controllable. But if you turn away from it, although it's not controllable, it's not that it will run you, smash you in the back. You're turning away or violate your intimacy with the ball. So it's very difficult for us now, and it wasn't. to be intimate with the bull. The teaching of suchness is the intimate transmission of being intimate with the bull. Which means being intimate with everybody and everything we feel.

[46:16]

And that's very difficult for us. So being intimate with the bull is a very powerful interrelationship of our life. And we have a teaching for that. Yes, Brian? Great study question. Yes, Grace? I think it helps to know what your limits are. Yeah, it does help. So, like, for example, It helped that I noticed that I want to be in this chair. That showed me something about... That helped me see that I was kind of like losing track of being upright. And being upright is to not try to have limits, but give up trying not to have limits.

[47:29]

Not be afraid, but be limited. I think in this case, I find it much easier to take him with the ball, getting the ball wide, wide, bird, big fence. As long as I know that if Paul charges the baby, I will get in the way of the charge. Sounds fine. Forgive me, I don't think it's quite related. I'm reminded of the scene at Tiananmen Square where the man with the packages from the store or whatever, went calmly in front of the tank, and the tank tried to... being the People's Army, brought in from other areas.

[48:46]

They didn't know what was going on, really. And then the man kind of came back in front of it again, in his case, very bravely, and back and forth with the tank and in that kind of situation. With Mr. Obama, he carefully did not say in the section I heard of the press conference, which wasn't the whole thing. He kept saying elect. And I think he said some words about maybe him In a very restrained way, he appeared to be expressing some positive sense about Mr. Trump, perhaps backing up on some of the extreme things that he had said or deciding to be

[49:56]

made him more restrained himself, and that the way to engage with the whole thing, it felt to me like compassion for everyone in this new situation. I approve of that. I approve that we can practice compassion in this new situation. Not specifically necessarily for Mr. Trump, but for Mr. Trump as a part of the whole phenomenon that is the bill that we're dealing with. And if it comes to some specifics, then I pray that we could be compassionate, that we can have Buddha's kindness towards specifics. Sometimes we need to walk gently in front of the tank. And I pray that when we do it, it's an act of compassion.

[51:05]

And on the list of compassion practices, judgment is not one of them. On the list of compassion practices, we don't have judgment. Good or bad. But rather... We have compassion with judgment, and then compassion with judgment, leads to wisdom, which is not really a judgment. It's just reality. There it is again. I didn't quite hear. Did you say that compassion without judgment is wisdom? Is that what you just said? I mean, judgment. The judgment of our minds, that's not compassion. But compassion toward judgment can lead to wisdom.

[52:11]

Wisdom which understands what judgment is. Compassion with judgments makes it possible for us to have judgments without abiding in them. Because if we abide in judgments, that's not the bodhisattva way. The bodhisattva way to abide in getting rid of judgments, to eradicate them, that's also not... Eradication of judgments is not on the list of compassion. Compassion makes it possible for us not to abide in our judgments, of Mr. Obama or Mr. Trump, or each other or ourselves. The theory is that if we have a mind which doesn't abide, this is what liberates beings.

[53:17]

This is a non-abiding mind. a mind which doesn't abide in the bull. And by relating to the bull in this paining process, we come to not abide in the process, or the bull, or the training. And I imagine that if I ever am not abiding, I won't necessarily know. But I can kind of tell when I'm abiding. because I can tell I'm a little bit inflexible, a little bit tight, or I'm somewhat tight, I'm somewhat inflexible.

[54:25]

I'm not really able to pivot in a situation. I'm not able to easily pivot from my opinion to not my opinion and back to my opinion. There's a little catch in it. I am a Biden, so I can get catch when I'm a Biden. When I am abiding, I think some thoughts. It's like I think some thoughts twice. When you're not abiding, you don't think thoughts twice. So if I think them twice or three or six times, I think, oh, maybe there's some sticking in the works here. But that's not the end of the story, to say, sorry, I was abiding, compassionate in the abiding, so I don't abide in the abiding. Is there a difference between a Buddha's relationship to the bull and a Bodhisattva's relationship to the bull?

[55:36]

The Buddha is the bodhisattva's relationship with the bull in its wholeheartedness. So bodhisattvas aspire to have a wholehearted relationship with the bull. And whatever way the bodhisattva… I don't say the bodhisattva is half-hearted with the bull. The Buddha is the way the Bodhisattva is half-hearted with the bull. But totally half-hearted. So if you could be totally half-hearted with all this danger, then that would be like the Buddha is you. But Bodhisattvas are sometimes just like Buddhas. In other words, they're like totally the client Bodhisattva they are. It's just that they totally have some sort of problem. And then they're just like a Buddha.

[56:42]

That's how a Buddha would be then. Yes? So, I think you just, you said that the ball was not such an issue. Yeah, but I had to remember. Thank you. Or rather, I let go of it. The way the bull is, it suffers. And it has been transmitted to us. So now we need to take care of the way the bull is. So that full moon ceremony this morning, is it the bull? I don't really say that you're the bull, because I'm the bull too, and everybody's the bull.

[57:46]

I don't think one of us is the bull. I think the way you include everybody, and the way you're including everybody, I think that's the bull. But the bull, when you first meet this thing, you've got a whole bunch of stuff, that you have not yet practiced to realize, but you include them. So right now we're having trouble, most of us, some of us are having trouble feeling that we include everything that's going on here, and that we're included in it. Most of us are having trouble with that. That's what suchness is, that's what the bullet is. But now we're kind of like at the point where we're kind of Get away from the situation. As in, you can't get away from suchness. But I still, it's new to me that I'm not going to be able to get away from this, and I'm not going to get away from anybody.

[58:53]

That I have to be with everybody. And not just be with everybody, but be with that everybody is included in me, and I'm included in it. Not just be with them, but... interpenetrating everybody. And of course I can't get away from that, but I thought maybe specifically I might be able to . I know I can't get away from how the way is all pervading in both directions. I know I can't get away from that, but maybe I can get away from a few people. And I can say to somebody, I think this is dangerous, or I think you're dangerous, without trying to get away from that they're included in me and I'm included in them. It's possible. But again, with myself feeling the way I do,

[60:02]

uncomfortable and I think there's a bit of danger and compassion with the other person and everybody else, that sets the stage for accepting this mutual inclusion, this mutual assistance of our practice. This is kind of related to your response to Mr. Collins' question, the wholeheartedness. This is actually quite appropriate.

[61:10]

I was going to ask, leaning or not leaning? I think I'm kind of leaning, leaning for cool. But I'm doing it wholeheartedly, so I'm not really abiding in the leaning. Anything else? I guess I just got a little tangled up in the leaning, or not leaning, and then you're standing on your own feet, but whose feet in relationship to... There's lots of advocacy. These feet are part of the bull.

[62:12]

I'm included in the bull. Inviting me to China. That's why she's calling to me, because I'm included in her. And I'm going to respond because she's included in me. All of me, all of me is included in her. And when you bring all of me, you bring everybody, and vice versa. And I sometimes want to lean on something other than meet her, even though I don't need to. But I can also lean and meet her too. I can meet her like this. And she can meet me like this. And she wants to, because we are doing this. We have some chronic history of resisting this.

[63:17]

The place where we're getting ready to give up our resistance and be here. And rather than reduce the feeling of the greatness of the challenge, the feeling of the greatness of the challenge has increased a lot. So rather than resist more as the challenge gets bigger, maybe possibly I will resist less, and our practice will actually be more wholehearted than it was when we weren't so challenged. It might have been okay if they still might not have recalled. We don't really have to be a whole lot of it, because it's just so nice. But obviously, to me, now we really need to practice. Of course we did before. Isn't it clear that we really need to practice? I mean, it's even more than before.

[64:26]

We need to be wholehearted. And yet, we occasionally want to lean away on something or into something. Wishing somebody not well. You could also wish that somebody would wake up and resign. But then would we not have to be wholehearted? Of course, if we know we have to be. Don't we all know that now? Isn't that really difficult? It's our responsibility, right? To meet and train the bull, and to let the bull train us. Isn't this wonderful? Oh, I didn't go that far. Not today. How far would you go?

[65:30]

What? How far would you go? Oh, I'd do that, sure. Yeah. Whose hand? Yes. Six. Sixth picture? Oh, my gosh, yes. Good question. Wow. I'm glad somebody else did it, not me. I didn't want to cop on in the fifth line. But she did it. Wow. Wow, we're having a great time. Thank you. That's the question. The last sentence in the preface is, so that Oxford is writing there also, and the last sentence is, we call you, but you don't turn around. Catch it, but you won't be tied down. And it sounds like not being approachable, graspable. Does that stand for samadhi? that the Oxford is, as you just said, happy with its humanity.

[66:36]

It's definitely not the marketplace. What does it stand for? I hesitate to answer your question. Really? Yeah. Oh, well, come. I'll pay you later. [...] Right now, the sixth picture is when we have no resistance to being in the picture forever. And when you actually... You said in the fifth picture? Yeah. What's the first? Well, the first, yeah. But now that we've been able to be in the first, we... We now have the great challenge of the fifth, which is its most intense meld that was in the first.

[67:42]

There was not much engagement in the first. We didn't even have the idea that we wanted to engage. We didn't even know what to engage with. Now we've got something to engage with, and we're... There was lots of yearning in the fifth, right? There was yearning, yeah, but we hardly knew what it was about. Still yearn, but now we know that yearning to have something other than this book is not appropriate. As Mr. Cohn said, Mr. Cohn, [...] Mr. Cohn. Mr. Cohn says, Because that makes it clear that whining is not an appropriate response to suffering. So now, in the fifth picture, we know that. Even though we're still whining, we know it's not appropriate. And now we've got something else. We've got the bull. And I would say that when we settled the bull,

[68:47]

So the practice of settling into samadhi, you could say, is the fifth station. When you obtain it and you're not resisting it, it's the sixth station. But also, as I said at the beginning of the class, whenever you're completely settling into one stage, you don't try to get anywhere, you move forward into the next one. And I think right now, I'm not completely still in the fifth stage. I haven't really... down and entered stillness with this bowl, with this bowl, with this world. I'm a little bit resisting it. So in that way, my resistance is keeping me from entering the sixth. I thought, you know, I thought last Monday I thought, but then when the fifth actually came, I realized I had some resistance to the fifth. which means I have resistance to what comes with, for me, what comes with the fifth?

[69:55]

Depression. Discouragement. Grief. Anxiety. Fear. Feelings of helplessness. All that stuff comes with the bull, which I didn't realize last week. But those are random. ...settle with this, the last Monday night, I can settle with this, then we'll go to the 6th. Which is like, the 6th is we have no complaints anymore, we're not complaining. If the bull, what does the bull do that you don't get turned around by? If it, you know, it doesn't disorient you, because you accept it. If it bucks, you don't resist it. Everything's happening because you're not resisting anymore. So I think he could say, OK, this is somehow that people are tamed.

[70:59]

They're not resisting anymore. And the fifth stage is giving up resistance to the bull. And I hesitated to say it, but I felt, you know, I felt so much pressure that I gave up. Not that I knew. You wouldn't have been able to. You have that, yes? So it sounds like resistance isn't something that one can settle fully into and move through. In this way, you've been telling me. Well, you can. Depression and resistance. In some sense, the fifth picture is resistance. Fully, fully. And so if you can totally settle into resistance, you cannot resist resistance. I mean, some of these things. Grieving is a manifestation of resistance.

[72:07]

If you resist, for example, that you lost your dreams of a leader that would be knowledgeable, protect women's rights, if you lose that and you don't let go of it, you resist losing that, But if you totally don't resist the grief, you move forward. So the grief is to say, okay, you didn't accept losing, so how about some grief? Okay, I can't accept losing, but I'll accept the grief. And you accept the losing and the grief, and you move forward. We can be wholehearted about resistance. That's why we have this practice called Confession and Repentance. I confess I'm resisting being with certain people up close, and for a long time.

[73:10]

I resist that. But I'm doing it wholeheartedly. That's who I am. Before, I was half-heartedly resisting, and I was totally stuck. And I'm actually half-heartedly stuck because I'm half-heartedly resisting. Now I'm totally resisting and totally not stuck. So, hey, resistors, do it more. If any of you are resisting, I believe it would be just like you except totally. You have to train even totally. Who would have automatically told me the way you are? I see you. These guys are before me. Do it. Okay. Just one of you? This is the one? That's me. Okay, let's do that. I'm sort of on board with wholeheartedly resisting, not resisting.

[74:34]

You're on board with wholeheartedly resisting? Yeah. Okay, yes. But what about... This seems to me to be another form of resistance, is half-heartedly being compassionate. What about that instance? Wholeheartedly be half-hearted compassionate. Half-hearted compassion is another word for resistance. Yeah, I don't want to be compassionate. And I think part of it can come from... Wait a second. Did you say you don't want to be compassionate? Yeah, to this point, yeah. So you want to be wholeheartedly compassionate? Are you wholeheartedly not wanting to be? That's kind of a question. I don't know how to navigate that space. If you can't say yes, I would say you're not. And if you could say yes, I wouldn't say necessarily you are, but you've got a great attitude.

[75:39]

Because really, in reality, if you're half-heartedly compassionate to the bull, you actually are wholeheartedly half-hearted. That's the problem. And the problem of being wholehearted is our practice. Our practice is the problem. How to be wholehearted. You've got to be wholehearted with something, and one of the things is resistance. And you can also be whole-hearted with not-resistance. That's funny too. But if you're whole-hearted with not-resistance, you won't abide in not-resistance. You move forward. Okay, Susan. What's the difference between grasping and resistance?

[76:46]

They're kind of the same. Abiding, grasping, resisting. But there's a slightly different angle then. When you abide in something, you're resisting not abiding. When you're grasping, you're... When you're grasping, you're abiding that something can be grasped. Grasping, attachment, resistance. Yes. So there's nothing to attach to, there's nothing to grasp, and there's nothing to abide in, but we slip into those things. But you realize that non-abiding, non-grasping, non-resistant, we're specifics. Like the book.

[77:48]

this aspect of the book or that aspect of the book. Yes? I really... Well, I guess I'm thinking about the oxherding pictures being relationship and... Yeah, I think they're a story of face-to-face transmission. And that... I think the reason it's been a story which I've often... I don't know... because of the difficulty of, and this conversation seems like a kind of good example of it, that the ox seems so singular and the sort of prism aspect of the ox, including...

[78:59]

Not being that Donald Trump is not the ox. I get that that has been discussed, but then in a way it comes back to like, we're really talking about Donald Trump is the ox. We're not, but we kind of are. And I guess I'm interested in, you know, Kamala Harris is part of the ox. I'm interested in the... that it's turning away, not turning away, And turning towards is a... You said this thing very nicely about today you were kind of confronted with, right at the beginning, that this was sort of brought to you, these specific things, right?

[80:18]

And I'm... It's an interesting question to me, the sort of... There's something about remembering that we were looking for the ox. Saying something like this also, that we were looking for the ox, and then, yes, here is the ox. I don't have to look for it anymore. So in that way, I'm very joyful that I don't have to look for the ox anymore. But I'm very challenged now that I've been successful. I've been caught by the ox. And I wonder if I'll ever again in my life forget that I'm with the ox. Hopefully not. I pray I won't ever forget the way it is now. The way it is now is kind of like...

[81:19]

Like it or not, we're kind of like accepting our responsibility. This is big time. Hillary Clinton's not going to do it for us anymore. And nobody else is going to do it for us either. Obama's not going to do it for us. Bill Clinton's not going to do it for us. Buddha's not going to do it for us. And we can't get away from this anymore. But you didn't think they were going to do it for us? Well, not, no.

[81:55]

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