last week marjorie asked me if shaken
share something with you and i said okay
thank you
today how sunday july nine
fifty years from when
truth or dixon
edited
here's mine
lectures
i would guess that most of us have seen
i just wanted to market
she was extraordinary
as
so many
ah
much

one source is
resources

it will be you'll see it on link right there ah when you got a true ah
i am nineteen and nineteen seventy greenville several pages are memorial to her
and you can see there
ah something about with extraordinary practice spirit
it's an inspiration to me i just wanted to share with this is the fiftieth anniversary of somebody she died
have you at at thirty years leave it
our mother also died very young so she had a difficult upbringing but it never appeared
she didn't represented is call
how but it had to have been pretty hard given discussion self esteem
and she practices city roshi for as she gets about seven years knowing the most of the time that she probably wasn't going to be able to be a cancer long term and finally coming to the been accepted
so i just wanted to show

a few days after she died in there was a funeral
had done
we call so koji since our first temple was called so you
and so there was the funeral and it was a fuse first funeral i ever went to
in my family
my mother never encourage my mother and father never encourage the children to go to funerals
and so we didn't go
i arrived at ten center and the teacher was doing a funeral so i went and i
yeah well i i was glad i went and it was it was protruding and i thought the someone is really good for the people at the ceremony
i wasn't certain thinking about that it was good for her at that didn't come across at that time is my first one
but i really felt it was good for me to be there
i members to zucker she's saying i never thought i would have such a great story

as trudy

i wanted to start by invoking a i guess a prayer
i think it's called a called the serenity prayer
somebody would somebody recited please

would you make it louder please
very days
not in hershey
god
give me the sanity
oh god give me the serenity
to accept the things i can't change
me and the courage to change the things that i can and the wisdom to know the which is which
so i'm
yeah so that's sort of what we're doing here we're considering
what's the appropriate response to this world
sometimes
yeah sometimes we were
serene when we're
silent and still were able to
see and where and accept see that something maybe can't be changed
like treaties cancer
she was pretty surreal about it
and yeah so she had the serenity to accept that maybe this was her
family inheritance
and then to have the courage to to make the changes that would seem to be beneficial
for example edited a book had added added some transcripts of talks given by your teacher change the transcripts into like english
and then change them into a book
and had the courage to do that even while
very sick
and then the wisdom to know which things to work on
and which things to make basically be quiet with
which thanks to be quiet and still and compassionate with and which thanks to
huh express some other kind of
response to the situation
can you hear me okay

and i said earlier
that we had this
we have
the stillness and silence and living there which is very close to being serene
there's illumination
there is a wisdom to see what is appropriate
and living in that wisdom
there is stillness
are living in that illumination
they're stillness so the in stillness the illumination can show us what's appropriate
and when we see what's appropriate were also
not moving around not making noise we just say what's appropriate and let it blooded be expressed
so
i have been what's the word kind of hesitant or anyway cautious about telling you about some kind of central teachings
our school of zen called in japanese called soto
and in chinese called
ah sour charm sodom sound don't not very nice sounding better way sodom school soto school of zen it's kind of like distinctive and core teaching
is that
ah
essence the essence of our life
and the function
of that essence
interpenetrate each other include each other
so the teaching is that our life has an essence
and that that essence functions
in essence that has a function or stillness
and unconstructive stillness
that has function and the function of the unconstructive stillness is illumination

so the the practice
stillness and illumination
is the practice of the interpenetration of
essence and function
essence and function or principle
and phenomena
the the the practice which is sometimes called silent illumination
the practice is the is the meditative practice of the teacher have
principal interpenetrating with
phenomena
and the word principal and phenomena
it in its i think it's useful to be able to use a lot of other words for that
so i'll give you some and
some now and more later another way to put it is
non particular
or on particular arised
and particular ized
universal and particular so universe in this teaching universal and particular
interpenetrate each other
everything is particular everything is what it is like for example you are what you are yourself and you are also a very a very very big
otherwise
you are everything in the universe also besides being the particular you
and this big otherwise interpenetrates with your
particular self
now the word is in buddhism we have the term emptiness
and then we have we are saved sometimes receive form but form is one example of existence so emptiness and form emptiness and feelings emptiness and perceptions emptiness and emotions emptiness in existence emptiness in existence interpol
bitrate each other

another
where to talk about it is
the upright
and biased or inclined
the upright and the inclined interpenetrate each other
in the upright there is various inclinations
but the can carnations are functioning in the upright
two
to listen to that teaching and to meditate on that teaching and to practice
silent illumination in relationships with that teaching realizes the appropriate response
the stillness has within it the capacity
to function
in relationship with
all
ordinary
phenomenon

yeah saw the in the in the serenity palm prayer
the the stillness
has the capacity the silence has the capacity to respond to situations that are not really calling to be changed but they are calling for compassion
and they're actually asking to be taught
compassion
and silence and stillness can respond to that request
appropriately
two
free that situation to liberate that situation
without changing
and in the other case
a change has been called for and the response is not really change it's a response by wish to change can happen
without losing
where the responses coming from in the changing

i have often reminded you of silence and stillness
and suggested to do you what is like to live in it

and again
i mentioned before there's there's constructed silence and constructed stillness
i've said that to over and over and i mentioned that in the yoga room particularly when we used to meet
over the julia morgan center
at the beginning of the classes
he was usually
kind of noisy
there was one or two pianos playing in right outside the room and two different pan and today to for ballet classes almost always there was a ballet class going on or two of em one of the second floor right outside and one downstairs
and the piano player is actually we're usually fairly good so it wasn't that irritating
and also outside there was traffic on college avenue
cars and buses and there were usually one or more dogs barking outside the window
and also apparently the that
julia morgan center was on the path of the oakland airport airplanes also flew over
here we have a trains
anyway and then the neighbors also sometimes talking to each other outside
and kids screaming and song anyway it was usually at the beginning of the class there was noisy
and
i didn't construct i wasn't into constructing silence and stillness
yeah i wasn't really yeah i wasn't into constructing it i just sat still but i didn't try to i didn't try to sit still i just sat down without trying to make that happen i just happened to be where i was
and i also didn't try to be quiet i will just quiet
i wasn't like trying to quiet myself down or the neighborhood down
but every single time i am and i never really i didn't even try to figure out what happened but every single time
without a name far as i know without any by hundred maybe somebody else constructed silence and stillness but i didn't and but their silence and stillness was revealed by the end of the clock of the session it was silent and still now here is not so noisy but the same story here
i'm not constructing silence and stillness here but in fact
that's what happens here
the embed don't even happen that's what's realize here still the unconstructive stillness doesn't happen they construct the stillness happens and doesn't happen and maybe some of you are constructing silence and stillness that are know
in this in the unconstructive stillness
living there which is where you live so it's like living where you are
and that and hearing the teaching that where you are is still and silent
illumination is there
now if you haven't have any illumination
and you would live in that he would discover this on constructed silence and stillness
and maybe illumination is how you can sit here without trying to sit still it's how you can sit still without trying to sit still it's how you can be quiet without trying to make yourself quiet
when you have illumination you can be quiet without making yourself quiet
you can be who you are without making yourself where you are
and
yeah that's that's like a good start for tonight
and that those words
our the function the words might be
the function of silence the word you have heard tonight are the function of silence
they're they're they're coming from silence
yes
here at it
you weren't here last week right
so last week i told a story
about hey
it was a tv show i saw and as a kid
and the way i remember this the story was this guy is young man made a bet with an old man for like two million rubles they're russians and
the bet was the original bet was the old man said i bet you can't
state in a room for five years
i bet you two million rubles your cat and the young man said i'll stay in for fifteen years and so that was the and the name of the story i found out later was the bet and was written by anton chekhov
anyway this guy this young man goes into this room and
yeah he he's going to stay there and he has a hard time staying there
just like if you were to sit someplace in new york and your own room just sit there for fifteen years you might have some difficulties you might and that that was part of the bit you know and you won't be able to stay you know a person cannot do that especially
really when you're doing it voluntarily and you know you can walk out and also edition man lost a bed he didn't have to pay he just lost the bet he didn't get the money but he didn't have the two million rubles rubles
he didn't have him he just wouldn't get him
so ah in the omitted even your grade will not be sufficient for you to do this especially when you know that you can actually leave anyway the young man did not leave
as so he kind of like constructed this himself into being able to stand that room he yeah he
he did a lot to be able to stay there
and he so he constructed stillness day after day after day he constructed stillness
and it doesn't say in the story when the unconstructive stillness dawned on him but one of the advantages of construct the stillness is you sometimes awaken to the unconstructive stillness
cause the the function doesn't come from the constructed stillness
because constructive still this isn't
the unconstructive stillness it's not a principal
so the think one year construct when the things you do from constructed stillness are basically more
either more running away or more stillness construction or more silence construction however in the process of constructing silence
you you might discover what's been there all along
so when he went in the room the unconstructive stillness was sitting there waiting for him
but he didn't see it because it's hard to see it it doesn't this is not visible and it doesn't talk it doesn't say
this is this is really deep silence here but our mind us a mindset this this is shallow this is medium this is deep silence that's not that's not constructed stillness does that comment that's a function coming from relative levels of construct
the stillness
and if you have questions about every hole just for a second but in the process of constructing stillness
somehow he opened to the unconstructive and when he opened to the and constructed after some time
he received either he discovered illumination in that unconstructive stillness so constructed stillness is actually kind of encouraged in a way so does
hey that's like getting together in a room is sitting down as like constructed stillness
and you don't have to even be trying to constructed any more than just go to the room sit down with other people
and that actually kind of construct stillness but then in the middle of that he just he discovered the real one and then you discover the illumination that and in that real not the real one yeah the real one the real stillness that doesn't come and go
and the constructive stillness which comes and goes how often
is a situation in which we discovered the unconstructive
and then
merit meditate on that
it's it's available for meditation even before you you enter the room and it's available have to you leave the room however when you come in this room and said still it might dawn on your especially after what i've said this might be a good opportunity to meditate on unconstructive dollars
the the guy says real stillness is here maybe i'll just kind of like check it out since since its here and i can also check out constructed stillness while i'm at it but but i need to actually let the other people do to construct a stillness if the needs to be done i'll just hang out with them
and contemplate
you could say absolute
absolute stillness unconstructive stillness and also i understand it if i in the process of contemplating on constructed stillness
the other three elimination gay
so then the illumination that came to the young man was it would probably be a good idea to leave
like maybe the day before the fifteen years was a
he couldn't let two days before ten days before but anyway he thought well i'll just leave like this one day before
that know the results that frequency saw with the appropriate response he could see it that illumination came to him
not by him figuring it out
not by him trying to be still but him trying to be still he discovered i would say this principle of things which inter fuses with the with your at with your expression and the expression is i think i'll take one day early and then i'd because i don't care about money
he he's also illuminated money's not the point of my life anymore that was part of the illumination
now what he didn't know as the person who the banker who was betting him had lost a lot of his money during those fifteen years and wouldn't be able to pay him and the wager was witnessed by important people so he would he would be very hard for him not to pay
and he tried various tricks to get the young man to come out that didn't work
and his friends and find out about that and his his reputation went down when they saw he was trying to trick the young man out by offering him a little bit of money to come out anyway
that the banker went into the
room where the young man was i remembered on the tv show it was a library but anyway he went in there
with a rap revolver to kill him say wanted to pay him
and he found a young man asleep at a desk
and he went over to him
and there was a note
flying next to his head i guess
an office address to the banker not but anyway he picked up the note read it the note said i'm going to leave early he don't need to pay me
and the young man did not consciously know that the banker had lost all his money was coming to kill him
the wisdom
you know
that come from stillness we don't in which we don't really know how bout that happens but it does and it was really nice that he didn't get killed the banker didn't kill him he was happy camper and maybe he even enlightened the bank or someone
i don't know
but that was an example of a pretty nice response rather than yeah basically being on illuminated and still busy trying to win the bed and then or the tragedy that would have happened if he'd continue on their path but from the stillness came the illumination
like when i was a kid nothing i saw on tv was an ad which goes
i'm from minnesota right
from the land of sky blue hotter wall hot irons
from the land of pines lofty boston comes the beer refreshing comes a beer refreshing hands
your
hans beer
and leno hands poor they used to be a big hand and brute brewery in san francisco and the building is still there you can see it from the freeway is now condos but he used to say when i came to san cisco has said hams
am i grew up there was an ad for that beer which says from the land of sky-blue or how to war hard news from the land of pines lofty boss in minnesota health system beautiful
lakes and then they said the beer comes from there anyway
this this is this wonderful appropriate response comes from the stillness

yes there is certainly an stroke
years
use it
the
purchase
so sad strong songs create you never have it
fish sandwich
you seem snow
who said yeah source
and also
even before you have stillness you can still be like constructing stillness
i'm trying to be still but i'm going to come there yet
and you're like perceiving that you're not really still and and then you perceive that you are still so the constructed stillness you can perceive you can also perceive constructed not very stillness so this is this is something that a lot of people do and that's fine and and then while your
doing that it's possible that the unconstructive stillness will dawn on you
can it you want to get rid of them
the you know i'd want to get rid of the constructed because
they are the unconstructive stillness expresses itself through a constructions but the function of the and constructed is construction
when we say
to reward is sad
is it practice
yeah but that i started i came to the julia morgan center of after i've been practicing pretty long time so i still go and sit and you and you can say i construct the posture
i can perceive the posture you can perceive my projects so i kind of set this i kind of set the stage or set the table for what for the feast of stillness i don't really try to make myself still
i just say i don't try to gain stillness i just sit and already been tried to gains just sitting
and then i am there i'm they're available for the unconstructive stillness to
to emit illumination
but even if i in my early years i think i did try to like gambling construct stillness construct spark silence get myself and i used to say i think i told you i used to say
be silent and still i even used to say to people don't move
in my early practice i was into constructing silence and stillness
no i'm into remembering it
remembering stillness that and i'm not and i'm remembering the stillness which is
is this as on constructed as can't go anywhere and it also
a bot although cat doesn't go anywhere illness doesn't go anywhere in the on construct it doesn't go anywhere it also can emerge and i are going to these details later it can emerge from
some construction
like you can find in a constructive thing you can scan discover you can discover it can come forth the unconstructive stillness can come forth just like for this young man the unconstructive stillness came forth from his activities in the room some of which were trying to
i think he he made a big average it keeps to get him stop to stay in the room he was trying to master himself and he was successful but he was kind of forcing himself to stay there for a long time after a while he wasn't forcing himself to stay there anymore so he was still in the room
he was in the room and he was still but after a while he wasn't forcing himself anymore
and then they kind of realized oh
he didn't say this necessarily but he kind of realized all without forcing myself to be still i am
the when you see that you're still without forcing yourself to bestow you just have illumination
and then from that elimination you can do other things like you can
he can sit down again without trying to
get anything out of it
so you can do a constructed thing like sit down
without trying to get anything for that shows that the construction thing the constructed activity of sitting down
is infused with the and constructed which isn't trying to make anything so you make the posture
but you also realize that posture contains this not trying to make anything so the unmade permeates and interviews is completely the made and the made interviews is completely the unmade
the made
the made completely permeates the unmade
and the unmade completely permeates the made
so i said earlier something like
it's past for me to speak to you which is kind of like construction right
language constructions permit to speak with you but the speaking can occur
in silence this peak speaking can occur in silence they constructed can occur in an unconstructive i'm like i'm not trying to calm myself down i'm just happened to be here and no place else and i start talking or talking a happens
and the talking can be
in the middle
have a stillness and silence which i did not make
however even though i didn't make this stillness and silence
which is here while i'm talking i can remember the silence and stillness and i can remember that this talking
activity is occurring in something universal
this talking which is which is born and dies born and dies born and dies
is living in something that is not born and die
it's living this this form these gestures are living in emptiness and remembering that is the meditation
on stillness
an illumination
i'm remembering
the stillness so that my speech is illumination is the function of the stillness or the function of the silence
hundred
that on honest as

i think that the compassion
the compassion basically practices on particularity ease
compassion doesn't exactly operate on stillness
stillness is like
the it's like
it's one of the words for reality
compassion doesn't exactly
it does come back to rise from stillness
when it does then it it is illuminated compassion it is compassionate illumination
but there can be a compassion which doesn't seem to be illuminated yet but is still focusing on a particularity
like a pain like a fear
so compassion towards
a compassion towards that
particular so compassion can be towards many particulars and wisdom is sort of more focusing on
first of all one thing like
emptiness or
the universal but then the than the wisdom can also open to seeing how the particular which compassion deals with interviews is
the universal
and so you can practice compassion or you're dealing with indifferent what you're dealing with particulars which is usually what compassion deals with and as you're dealing with particulars you can discover
the universal
because it's right there
to get that
if so you there's plenty of particulars in your life right pains and pleasures fear and courage
ups and downs birth and death lots of particulars game got the particulars
when you practice compassion with the particulars you will discover the universal because universal permeates all the particulars

at that point there's illumination
when you when
by by being compassionate you settle into the stillness
you're not you know you're like not running away from the pain or towards the pain you're just like being completely embracing this company with compassion this particular and in that embrace your without even trying to make yourself still but you could also
be part of being compassionate is you could like force herself to stay with somebody
when a guy forced them to still from the stay in the room some people forced themselves to stay with their sick friend david they're trying to get away they want to get away from their friend but they so they forced himself to stay in following that
they're trying to be compassionate but have they don't they're not quite fully compassionate they're still trying to get away and then i often recommend to people who are trying to get away from their compassion practice
to be compassionate towards trying to get away
if you if we have practice compassion towards trying to get away we often discovered that we're not getting away the words we discover that we're right where we aren't rediscover stillness
without trying to make yourself
still
you can discover it with and also without trying to make yourself still while you're trying to get away from the situation both to be compassionate years if you are trying to make yourself is still if your compassionate towards that
you'll discover the stillness which has not made by you
can try to make myself still it's a particular trip a particular activity and that's calling all the people were trying to make themselves still are involved in that particular activity
and that activities cline for compassion and if your compassionate towards trying to make yourself still you will discover the university
the universal stillness which is always right there all things are completely still and silent all time every moment that's the where the are and
they're also not that way and the not that way is
interviews with the that way
so compassion is a necessary part of the process
of practicing this teaching it's even part of them necessary process of listening to the teaching even before you put it into practice
listening to it is an act of generosity and listening to it carefully as an ethical discipline and being patient with
the teaching and how difficult it has to understand is also part of compassion and so on all that helps you wake up to the stillness which doesn't come and go
being compassionate to the stillness which comes and goes will bring you to wake up to the stillness it doesn't and that awakening again is simultaneous with illumination
yes yes yes
yes long lines you tell a story of history
one of his arms so she says grandma horse yeah so sure that want to writer and perhaps my says give and asher said he saw
your ears are on constructed sensitive skin color
he read those books
know why says that because a decision
i says and half for strong so yeah
said most frightening s
so starts at it before that construction so yeah it starts to use square and i just started to rise of habitat as a former soccer match
yeah and in the constructions are particulars so when your compassionate to the particulars you discover the universal when your compassionate just constructed he discovered the unconstructive
and then the and then in discovering the unconstructive you also discover illumination
and then you understand that the whole time that you are working with this constructed particularity ease and trying to be compassionate towards them this thing was always there and now you get to see it and for and is wonderful and it also changes your whole history
the to realize he was always there with you even before you saw it now you see it you see it's the kind of thing that was always there rather than your have undertake on it but part of it is and i've always been here with you did you have a handwritten a while ago
can i go to him before you hey barry
so
in our lives
fees fog
it it moves us stock know
wow somebody's been doing something beautiful even know who out failure in a one move to cry it's emotional rises up in us and i wanted you to to talk about how that fits into constructed or not
strike still asking about it because a lot of time you talked about his role as the international
first time an emotion and software i'm so emotional
i guess jeans jeans wonderful thing
how that plays energy a boy
that
well i have understand i have a wonderful understanding of your question i don't know if and interviewed like it
and here's my understanding is that some movies and some dancers and some novelists and some runners and some batters and some tennis players
and some basketball players
that
they somehow they become an opportunity
for us to concentrate on what they're doing
they kind of like they do something and we look at it we gonna go we're like front rate we don't try to were not like camera and and credit concentrate on this baseball game i'm a real to concentrate on this movie
me some people maybe do that the only beauty the got concentrate on this movie but some movies
i mean they they help you concentrate on them
gentlemen some novelist like which is named jonathan franzen
he's not a terribly difficult novelist but he feels that the way he writes in the way his pal
david foster wallace
it
that they write in such a way has to kind of require their readers to be concentrated they're trying to do it helped to readers be concentrated and if they can get the readers to concentrate know i i'm taking it further than what he said he just says that the the kind of novelist he is
and his friends are are people who are trying to help people concentrate
then i would say by helping people concentrate you help people open to illumination
so some novelists they write in such a way that you cannot keep reading very long without concentrating and when you concentrate this illuminations happen the lights go on like the iliad and the odyssey they aren't that interesting if you're not concentrated
like going through the list of of military equipment that various armies have and who is a different armies with the different people now army are and how many slaves they have and how many tripods and how many stores that part of it is you know it's not exactly
fun to read that stuff more effect and you can read it and try to like you can kind of be like what how much longer is is going to go on you know one am adding a going i going to get through it this but if the list goes out long enough you may be stopped resisting and just start reading six tripods four hundred and twenty
seven a sores eighteen spears you start to actually
focus on each word and each image and then
the lights go on
the lights go on what lights on or know what the lights of ancient greece and these lights are like not just delights in the room you are in but the lights from thousands of years ago gone he look at the ballet dancer and your constant
great on her
and this illumination happens because you're concentrated he look at the movie is such a movie where you actually are there
and you see something and the tears come because he opened to the beauty it's not the beauty isn't actually in the movie
but it isn't the movie but it was there before you saw it it just that you weren't concentrated before and then but somehow the movie works you and support you to be concentrated and then your concentration and you're not waiting anymore
this wonderful illumination occurs
my summer
for it worked for your family you most members
i don't think the parroting the emotion i think the purpose of the emotion might be
might be to help you to ask yourself some more questions and practice some more stillness to have some more emotions because these emotions aren't just emotions their splendid they're like they're magnificent emotions they aren't just like i'm happy they're like body shaking
you know they're their transcended yeah and so the purpose of a transcendent i think the purpose of a transcendent would be maybe into like go back and and concentrate on a particular again purpose of a transcendent would be to go back into the on transcended
and the and transcended is what yours is is the person you're seeing their dancing or the person you're seeing their running does does not transcend that's a particular but because you look at to trend because you concentrated on a particular runner
you saw how beautiful she was you won't you had this abomination and that elimination should encourage you to look at other runners that way to so the purpose of the elimination his more practice
of stillness and elimination
the purpose of elimination is is to keep the process of elimination going to keep the process of transcendence which means to continue to process of
entering into the particular because transcendent isn't just going beyond the particular is going beyond and went back into because what you'd just realized that in the particular you discovered the transcendent the universal
but if you go from one level to the other your body like you know secrete various liquids
because it's such as is such a into by it's a it's a life changing thing you're not like bought bottled up anymore you you kind of transcend your limits and thing and things around things start flowing
when i was one of my first practice periods to talk to her i started to relax a lot and i was afraid i would wipe my pet i would put my pants
because i was so relaxed i didn't but i just you know we don't have to hold ourselves as tightly as we do
you know it we're not going to put in our pants every relax problem or
i haven't heard much examples of that
people more proven their pants when they're scared tense up
involuntary poop comes from awful
from like
so yeah i'd say those emotions are they're accompanied months of illumination
and they're optional you don't have to cry when the illumination arrives but often we do
which is fun
then it's fine i think it's just my okay so next myth maybe was matty and then barbara joan
last week pay or a as good is that this constructed language so illness and death
good work jeff
i'm not either but she said she'd you're you're always helping her don't worry
related to the pretty things that the relative river young age and connections there permanent i couldn't understand a little bit better it's so the just way to clarify for years so it seems like i have been passed conversation that rogue river
striving for this makes them wanted to get to the river thinking the rivers a better place to be a row the team great for schechter but now even this relationship between this
unstructured and structured still as actually the independence over to they if you have that before sitting practice averted
the other young and
so she's referring to up the image at the beginning of a book bike ben okri called the famished road and the book starts out something like in the beginning was the unborn
brackets on constructed
unmade
in the beginning was the unborn and it was like a river
but then the river got covered by a road and the road spread out over everything but because the road was originally a river it was hungry for the river
so every particular the unborn is covered the universal is covered by particulars the of course always hear the on constructed you can't get away from it but we also have this life where we scatter particulars on top of it or you know
but these particulars also because they are actually in the on constructed that kind of yearn to get reconnected but the particulars are better worse than can construct insisted the their intimate and sometimes we're we're often stuck in the pertain
colors and hungry for the universal
we're stuck in the constructed and were hungry for the unconstructive and then again being compassionate to that hunger
without doing anything other than being compassionate as a hunger
the water sports through the road
now are we realized that the the water with the river was always here and that this the road the particular was always living in the
in the universal poor you also realize of the universal was always in the particular the river was actually in the road and the road is always in and on the river there's no road without the river know river without the road and when we're caught in the road and hungry from union with the on
born
that feeling of hunger is calling for compassion
night we shouldn't get rid of the hunger and we shouldn't like you know start pouring stuff into the hunger necessarily unless the temporarily were measured hundred miles they feed me some blah blah you might say okay you might say no but you do it it as an act of compassion
in both cases
and then you've suddenly oh my god look what i found in the road it's a river
just what always wanting
and i got and i stopped called i stop neglecting the road because of my hunger and before i wouldn't take care of the road because i was too hungry for the river but nine i stop neglecting the road i took renewed carry the road and then i
realized the stillness and i realized
the universal to river the unborn in the constructed
and vice versa when you realize the on constructed
we don't use your practice compassion with that but we kind of do practice compassion with it actually and the way we practice compassion with the on constructed with the illumination
that lives in the stillness to waver practice compassion with that is donated to your local charities give it away give it away don't hold on to the illumination
don't want onto them the feeling that comes with the elimination
like when i was on my father died it was not much of his prize i'd i'd been with him many times where i thought
if can die right then
many times has this is his last breath so i was ready when he died i wasn't in the same state as him to the same part of the country when you die was and okay
so i went via thousand miles to go see him and i want that funeral i went to that was after it started going to your
no i'm like a funeral attic
i tell stories about my funeral enjoyment later but anyway i went to this this when this verse wedding this funeral was after i started to go to funerals and it was from my father's and so when i went to this mortuary place
and there he was an open casket and he had on a nice suit and now i went up to him and i looked element i think i think i guess what i felt like i just saw this like profound sweetness that he was
and i just burst into tears and they were joyful tears incredibly joyful i saw how and my father had problems but i saw how beautiful he was
with his makeup on
how beautiful he was what a sweetheart how look how blessed i was and i was just bawling
with joy
i wasn't the tiniest bit said at that time i am sometimes sad about my father mostly i'm too blessed
buy everything about him including all though
immature on scope of things he did to show me was unskillful in immature he did that for me he was
he's just make that blessing
and i just felt this great joy and and my uncle and i look like i was probably maybe i look like i was in trouble
i don't know what my uncle thought his older brother but it came over any kind of like forced me to stop crying
and i gave it up
i wasn't attached to this a lesson bawling i just let it go
it was such a blessing
tears can be such a blessing
when and they have when they come from illumination
from seeing how beautiful somebody is or something as how beautiful it is beyond any kind of measure
now digital cameras christmas
bobby john
why
because it it's quite intellectual in norway intellectual but i think intellectually challenging challenging
so i just i just in one
drive you away into the hills by bringing up this cut quite philosophical discussion and i have more of a to
i gave you a little bit tonight and you seem to be doing okay so i'm i'm encouraged to give you more next week
but you know the interviews one of the principal and phenomenon seems compact met some people go get be earlier
but you know you seem to you know a a girl she also talked about in talking about principal or emptiness it's like
and then taught me about form the emptiness is like salt and the form is like rice
and you know if you put too much salt on the race it's not it's really hard to eat
but the right man assault on the rice dash our life are phenomenal life putting the right amount of principal on it is really makes it taste great but it's kind of an art to know how much an emptiness how much how much on constructed stillness
us to put on to are constructed wife and so i was kind of cautious because i'm bring up the salt which i don't i won't want to put so much on you you know get sick or disgusted
this it's true it's all day
this is to emptiness
this is to i'm going to strive to give me a break yes guy think that's why
well or i had an experience
well then then
a matter
the a
so a homer glasses
football play and
difficult to
use words for what good is exquisite
but it was much lawyer with them
i didn't know what it was
the
in the black kid in the thing
and i was thinking maybe is this is the stillness or the war is of the person who did it this something
impressive
the ahead of lovely person would do love so high i was experiencing
the person's
the get energy room
who yup the the person or the machine that made it you're experiencing all that in that market but much much more than that the whole universe
makes that blanket
and you may be got a little bit of
compassion towards that blanket and the blanket revealed
the and constructed stillness an abomination to you
the sanders was no in me same that it was calling to by looking at that thing is almost as if the i don't know and identify said like some novels they call you to be still
like the iliad calls you to be still
it's it's kind of thing if you try to get entertainment on of this book you're gonna miss it
you should get you should just be obedient to make just will listen to me without trying to get any meaning and i'm calling to you to be still while you read this book
i'm so tip they are teenagers have a hard time reading the iliad and odyssey because they have a hard time
listening to the call to be still with the with these classics so it's useless but the the the classics and also our carpet or a yoga mat there are calling to you for compassion they're calling to you to be still with them
and if you if we received that call
can they bestowed on us the light which is eminem
and so you got a little light there congratulations
kisses
you're welcome to kiss him and in
is that okay if she kissed similar
the other people sweat on i'm you can kiss them
yes
hi
i yeah
why
a mess

hello
this is a big question and i'll try to answer quickly now because we're over overtime you can bring it up again next time basically
if you are relating to an object sentimentally
with sentimental compassion or sentimental attention and carefulness as the start i gave a class here on different kinds of compassion wants ten years but when the compassion is full you're no longer identifying with the object but when you start usually you identify or don't identify with it
and so that that that sentimental identification with the object could be the beginning of your compassion but when your compassion is full you don't identify with the particular thing you you a particular person you are doesn't doesn't
identify with the particular thing that's there
and then and that kind of compassion then you see the identification of the particular with the universal
if you if the if the particular you identifies with the particular it you still kind of like postponing the realization that the particular it and a particular you are interviews both with the universal
but as your compassion as more and more he'll get more and more settled and then you realize oh
i'm identified not with this thing but with everything and that thing is not identified with me into identify with everything including me
but can send on compassion is more like she's identify with me and and i'm identified with her but we're not identify with everybody
nuts and that's a start as that's a nice
i i i have compassion for you and i'm identified also there can also be i'm identify with you and i do not feel compassion for your macro die hate you because i'm identified with you so that kind of compassion is a warm up to a compassion which isn't just for this particular
but
for every particular
and then we'll get to see
every particular includes universal
i couldn't talk who we can talk about this more later okay thank you so much