The thought that you are maintaining the essential working of the Buddha way. And I thank you very much. The thought that you are persevering in your efforts to do so, even though you're feeling sometimes quite tired and sick. So I know it's been difficult. Thank you for continuing to practice. I also feel that the Zendo has been pretty quiet. So I think it's good that sick people have gone someplace. I assume people are somewhere else coughing.

[01:05]

Because it's pretty quiet. It hasn't been a lot of... It hasn't been real noisy in the Zendo. Sometimes it's really... It gets really noisy, but I think it's good to... If you have a lot of coughing, it's probably better to go out of the hall and cough out there, in the coughing area. So, I was talking about, well, I often talk about the job of a Zen priest. Zen priests are one type of bodhisattva.

[02:07]

And there's other types of bodhisattvas, like there's Zen lay people. And there's Vajrayana priests and Vajrayana lay people. And there's Pure Land practitioners. I remember not too long ago, I went over to the Institute for Buddhist Studies in Berkeley. because the Buddhist churches of America, which is the Mahayana Bodhisattva Church of the Pure Land School, they were offering to give away a huge... I put it on the internet.

[03:25]

They said, anybody want it? And I guess nobody wanted it. And I heard about it and I said, I think maybe it might fit in the temple called Noah Boat over the hill. There's a temple called Noah Boat over the hill from Green Elch. So I said, can I come and look at it? So I went over there and looked at it. And I thought, I think it will fit. Perfectly. Amazing. And the person who showed me that was a Mahayana priest of the Pure Land School. And I was really impressed with who he was. So there's lots of kinds of bodhisattvas in the great vehicle.

[04:30]

And one type is a Zen priest. And one of the Zen priests in the school was called Suzuki Roshi. And he said one time, the job of a Zen priest, brackets, bodhisattva, close brackets, is to encourage the practice of Zazen. And I often think, well, since he ordained me as a Zen priest, maybe that's part of my job. Maybe that's my only job. I've been spending time with a small female lately. She's still small.

[05:32]

She doesn't seem to be growing. They call her tiny. And she calls me granddaddy. And it's my job to encourage her to practice Zazen. I think, well, yes. Is she interested in my encouragements? Sometimes she doesn't seem like she is. She's very interested, however, in my services. So, in a way, that's the way I encourage her Zazen is by doing pretty much whatever reasonable thing she asks me to do. Green Gold does that too. It helps, tries to help people in many ways. Yeah, like that. I'm going to be bringing a chair.

[06:33]

Thank you. I'll take an unwobbly one. Thank you. See what I mean? She's trying to encourage zazen. Right? Stability. Stability. Yeah. We're trying to encourage stability in the midst of what somebody mentioned to me yesterday, in the midst of creative confusion. I thought, oh, that sounds like karmic consciousness. So all sentient beings, all living beings, bodhisattvas, just have karmic consciousness. But bodhisattvas, not bad bodhisattvas, and bodhisattvas vow to develop stability, concentration, great compassion,

[07:46]

in the midst of creative confusion. And many of us are aware of confusion, which we might call . Anyway, it is a realm of creativity, this confusion of karmic consciousness. And it's possible to develop tranquility, concentration, samadhi, it's possible to develop samadhi in and in samadhi there is stability, there is being undistracted, and there is openness to distractions. Like, there is like being really present and stable and undistracted, and then when distractions are given, they are welcomed, they are listened to, they are respected, they are treated with compassion, but they are not, they are not

[09:14]

They're just welcomed. They are treated with carefulness because if you're not careful with distractions, you can be disturbed by them. Samadhi, as Carolyn read from her notebook, about curiosity. Samadhi, you could say, is kind of curious. But it's curious not like looking around for some place other than here. It's an openness to uncertainty. In Samadhi, there's an openness to uncertainty. And she didn't mention it, but I would add now, it is an openness to certainty. It's an openness to certainty. It's an openness to certainty. is not a clean preference for certainty. It's an openness to it.

[10:24]

And if you're not open to uncertainty, that will also hinder openness to certainty. It is openness to clarity. It is openness to pain. It is openness to pleasure. It is openness to sickness. It is openness to health. All the while being stable. On sharas that wobble and sharas that wobble. So the job of a Zen priest if it's to encourage Zazen is to encourage the perfection of wisdom. Because Zazen is the perfection of wisdom. And the perfection of wisdom is stability in the midst of creative confusion.

[11:30]

And the perfection of wisdom is generosity with karmic consciousness and being ethically careful with karmic consciousness and patient with it and enthusiastic with it. However, not however, and Well, yes, I'm open to our rhetoric, but I'm also open to... And being one with samadhi is open to unenthusiasm. So it's okay... the perfection of wisdom along with its support of samadhi is open to below standard enthusiasm. It's open to depression. It's open to discouragement.

[12:33]

The encouragement of zazen comes from openness to discouragement about zazen and great encouragement too. I just thought I might mention those things since they just came up in my mind. Not all of you were at the question and answer on Sunday, right? Is that right? Not all. Well, a couple of people asked. Yeah. One person from the city center asked, and Peter Coyote asked something like this. Peter said something like, a few years ago, he heard Baker Roche say something like, it's really important to fix your intention on something, like what's the most important in your life, and be unwavering and unshakable in that intention.

[13:39]

To discover your fundamental intention. To discover it, yeah. And then I hesitate to say, abide. Yeah. I'm open to you saying, abide. So I in this intensive, but I often start practice periods and Sashin, well actually we say at the beginning of Sashin, we say Sashin is an opportunity to discover anew, but also to discover for the first time, discover for the first time anew, to clarify and to actualize your practice. ultimate concern, your ultimate intention and request of life. And then by discovering it and clarifying it, when you actualize it, then it is actually unshakable.

[14:53]

So the question is, what is this bodhisattva unshakable resolution for enlightenment, for the welfare of all beings, what does that unshakable resolution have to do with not abiding? And, well, I'll just say what I think. May I? The non-abiding, unsurpassable protection of of the unshakable resolution. The resolution, when the resolution for complete enlightenment is realized, is realized simultaneously with the mind of no abode. But if you don't abide in your vow, that you might lose it. I say no. If you, well, it may sound like if you don't abide in it, you might lose it. The mind of no-abode can take care of the vow without abiding in it.

[16:04]

It's a way of taking care without abiding. For example, it's a way of teaching or encouraging zazen without abiding in your idea of how to encourage zazen. The teaching and the teaching... of the mind of no-abode is for those who have an unshakable resolve for enlightenment. It's for bodhisattvas. You might think, well, my intention is shakable, you shouldn't be teaching me. about the perfection of wisdom. The perfection of wisdom is for those who have an unshakable, definitive, singular commitment to the great vehicle of the bodhisattva. That's who the teaching is for.

[17:05]

According to The teaching, that's who it's for. It's for what? That's who it's for. So the unshakable commitment is the situation in which you're told, by the way, the thing you're The thing you're committed to offers no way for abiding in it. The thing you're committed to, in all things, lack of dimension. That's a teaching to us after we wholeheartedly commit to the path of compassion. So I was going to offer some teachings in Poland this summer on the perfection of wisdom.

[18:30]

And it wasn't going to be a very long retreat. So actually what I said I would do, I would basically talk about the warnings in teaching the perfection of wisdom. because i thought if i just go there and teach the perfection of wisdom without finding out without finding out the people are committed to the bodhisattva vows appropriate to them so i should tell them who these teachings are for and how these teachings are not appropriate for people who don't have this vow because if you hear these teachings you might slip into nihilism and oblivion you might say, what about the precepts? Yeah, what about the precepts?

[19:31]

Those who are committed to the precepts wholeheartedly, they are the ones who are then told there are in fact no beings practicing these precepts and there are no precepts to grasp. This is for those who are committed to it and say, No, I really want to practice the precepts. All my hindrances and doubts will fade away. If I have time, I'm going to more the different types of mental situation which are not conducive for the reception of the teachings of perfect wisdom. There's a sutra called The Questions of Su-Vikranta-Vikraman where a number of

[20:45]

examples of the minds of karmic consciousnesses are given that are not appropriate for studying. And I find it helpful because when I hear that and I look in my mind and say, is my mind like that? And if so, I should kind of like take care of that because that mentality will interfere with receiving the teachings of perfect wisdom. And, you know, one of the examples of a consciousness that's not suitable for receiving the teachings of perfect wisdom is a teaching, is a mind that has low aspiration. Low being, for example, I wish to attain happiness just for me. It's not a bad aspiration, it's just low relative to I wish for the happiness of all living beings.

[21:51]

So wishing for peace and freedom for me in itself is that kind of attitude is not an attitude to have to receive this teaching. But wishing to be compassionate to all beings without exception, that's a high aspiration. That's the kind of aspiration which works for this teaching. I also said before, I'll say again, I could say it in the form of, do you remember? Maybe I'll do it that way. Is that okay? Do you remember I mentioned, I asked the question that Asanga asked, or I quoted Asanga asking the question, who enters realization of reality? Who enters reality? Who enters into Zazen? Who enters into, Asanga didn't say who enters into Zazen. Who enters into the perfection of wisdom?

[22:55]

And then he said who entered. Do you remember what I said? Those who praise all Buddhas. Okay. Raven remembered those who praise all Buddhas. He actually said those who serve all Buddhas. And serving Buddhas is multidimensional. But anyway, and one of the dimensions of serving Buddhas is to praise them. Say, good talk, teacher. Good teaching, teacher. Good compassion, teacher. Good zazen, teacher. Thanks, teacher, for that good orioke practice. Anyway, praise is part of serving Buddhas. Another part of serving Buddhas is... What do you call it? Pay homage to them. And pay homage means to align yourself with their practice. So another way to pray, the way Suzuki Roshi liked to be praised was by people practicing zazen.

[23:57]

That's the way he liked to be praised. To make offerings to Buddhas. Yeah, so serving Buddhas is one of the... Those who serve Buddhas And what else do they do, those who enter perfect wisdom, besides serving innumerable Buddhas? Those whose minds have been permeated by minds. Those whose minds have been permeated. And minds means the karmic consciousness, where we speak English and so on. Karmic consciousness has been, actually, karmic consciousness has received of perfect wisdom in the form of words, and then the reception permeates the unconscious processes. Those who have done a lot of that. What's another point? Yeah, single-minded, unshaken in the Mahayana.

[25:02]

And then one more point. Yeah, those who grow the roots by practicing the six perfections. Those who do these practices, this teaching is for them. And then again, you might think, well, I don't know if I'm doing that stuff. Maybe I shouldn't be listening to these teachings. Maybe not. Sorry. Or if I'm not doing... Even if somebody's saying to them, I'm not listening to them, really. They're bouncing off my lack of some of those practices. I'm too busy to be whatever, you know. And then the teaching bounces off. But still, it's somewhat dangerous, and I recognize that. And I'm here... Pick up the pieces if this teaching is offered and somebody becomes nihilistic, I'm here.

[26:05]

I hope I catch anybody that becomes nihilistic when they hear these teachings. That's why I'm saying this now. If anybody thinks that these teachings don't mean take care of the forms of this practice, it doesn't matter whether you're on time or not. If anybody thinks that Please tell me so I can say, no, that's not what we mean by perfect wisdom. Somebody wrote me a note just yesterday. She said, I know it doesn't matter whether I was at the talk on Sunday or not, but it matters to me to tell you that I wasn't. And I wrote back and I said, it does matter. What we do in karmic consciousness does matter. It also matters that we don't abide in anything in karmic consciousness because that's what liberates us.

[27:07]

So those qualities, those four qualities, are the qualities of the bodhisattvas who enter perfect wisdom. Unshakable faith in the Mahayana teaching. Thorough practice of the six perfections. listening to the teachings a lot, a lot, a lot until the teachings permeate our cognitive process and permeate our body which supports our cognitive process. Transforms our and transformed our body. And we do this in service of those who are giving us this teaching. We do this in service of the gentle Buddhas who give the teaching of perfection of wisdom. We serve those who are really good at taking care of sentient beings. We serve the teachers of perfect wisdom. We serve the teachers of zazen.

[28:09]

and in that way we are joining their work we are maintaining the work of the buddhas the perfection of wisdom is ethics and part of ethics is confession and repentance where we notice that we get distracted or we notice We don't do what we want to do and we acknowledge it and we acknowledge the way we feel, that we feel sorrow when we don't act the way we want to act. And we feel sorrowful in a way that makes us more serious, devoted, more joyful than going back to work. That's repentance. That's part of compassion, that's part of ethics. During an intensive period like this, maybe I could mention something that

[29:29]

Well, like, you know, I asked, did you remember what I said a few days ago? And some people, like, remembered because you were intensely remembering things in this situation. So in this situation, you plant some seeds. I'm planting seeds, which maybe can germinate in this environment. I want to also say there's a verse that you can do when you... offering incense. And there's a verse you can do when you bow. And there's a verse you can do when you prostrate. There's two of them I can think of. I'll mention one of them today. And then you can memorize it if you want to. It goes like this. Person bowing, person bowed to, their nature, no nature.

[30:36]

This, the other body, not too. Plunge into the inexhaustible vow, realize the Buddha body. The way I said it was person bowing, person bowed to, but you can also say bowing, bowed to. Or that which is bowing, or the bowing and the bowed to. Their nature, in other words, same nature. This body, the other body, not two. plunge into the inexhaustible vow, realize the Buddha body. This body, the other body, my body, other body, not two.

[31:55]

Realize the Buddha body. Plunge into the inexhaustible vow. Realize the Buddha body. It's four lines. Do you think bow or bow? Bow. Inexhaustible vow. Yeah. This is a bowing verse, but it has the word vow in it. It's probably more rhythmic in Japanese. Well, the translation can be changed. You can change the translation and make it better. That's my... Realize the Buddha body. Realize the Buddha body. Realize the true body of Buddha. Realize the Buddha body. Transcending enlightenment and non-enlightenment depend entirely on the strength of zazen.

[33:31]

Transcending non-enlightenment and transcending zazen depend entirely on the strength of perfect wisdom. Wisdom beyond wisdom. I've looked upside down and said Zazen is Zen what? What does it say? Zazen is Zen the previous page? Zazen is Zen Zazen is a Zen party. Sometimes people say stuff that they think I said, and I say, I agree. About more than 40 years ago, I was at Tassajara.

[34:39]

A friend of mine, which many of you know, his name is Dan Welch, and he told me he had a dream. And the dream was that we had a party in the Zendo. And the party was, we were in the zendo. This is like the old zendo before we had the fire. We're in that zendo. And we were sitting next to each other in rows facing the wall. That's not the familiar zen party, right? And the difference between what we usually do and the party was you could turn and talk to the person next to you. Just the one next to you, not down the row. The Zen party. So again, Avalokiteshvara, you know what she does.

[35:48]

She lives in the center. What does she live in the center of? Suffering. She lives in the center of all suffering. And that's what she does, really. Everybody's in the center of suffering. We all have a center seat. Not a ringside seat. We're in the middle of the ring. We're in the middle of the ring. We're in the bodhimanda, each of us, surrounded by all suffering beings. And there's many calls, and we're trying to practice samadhi there. So we listen to the calls, we're open to the calls, but we don't get pulled by them. We respond to them without being pulled or pushed. And I mentioned that to someone, and he said, well, it's like there's this wall of stuff in my face.

[36:57]

And I said, well, that's another way Tashvara practices. She sits and faces a wall. Bodhidharma is Avalokiteshvara, right? According to our story. And she sits there and faces the wall for nine years. This is the way she listens to the cries of the world, sitting and facing coolly, with a cool head and a warm heart, she faces the wall for nine years. And in her back, spouts the great flower of Zen. Five petals. So many opportunities for non-abiding.

[38:43]

So many opportunities for slipping into abiding. So many thoughts where we can slip into like grasping them. So many opportunities to really open to what's happening without leaning into it or leaning away from it. There's a Rumi poem which also I often recite, which is, The breeze at dawn has secrets to... Hmm? the secret at dawn teaching has secrets to reveal to tell us to teach us the secret the breeze at dawn has secrets to tell us to teach us don't go back to sleep you have to say what you really want to say what you really want don't go back to sleep

[40:03]

People are walking back and forth on the threshold where the two worlds meet. The door is round and open. Don't go back to sleep. At one point in my life, I thought, the door is round and open. Don't go back to sleep. In other words, you can walk through the door. Now I feel like the door is wide and open. It doesn't mean you go through the door. It means you stand or sit upright at the threshold and you don't go into either world. You don't go into that world or this world. You don't go into perfect wisdom and you don't go into karmic consciousness. You sit at the threshold where the restricted world of karmic consciousness meets the world of freedom from karmic consciousness.

[41:10]

You sit there, and you're open to perfect wisdom, and you're open to karmic consciousness. Earlier you mentioned that, and that was always a problem for me, that beyond enlightenment, beyond unenlightenment, that's fine, but to go beyond enlightenment, and that may be the threshold. Yeah, the threshold actually goes beyond, and it also goes beyond unenlightenment, being upright on the threshold. But if I lean, if I lean into enlightenment... which then I get, in a way, I get away from unenlightenment, but I don't think that's our... If you lean into delusion or karmic consciousness, in a way, you transcend enlightenment. You're no longer stuck in enlightenment then.

[42:13]

There you are, abiding in your thinking about what's going on. You're not stuck in enlightenment anymore. Enlightenment at last. But how about being free of it without leaning back into delusion? And how about being free of delusion without leaning into enlightenment? So now I feel we're all walking back on the threshold, we're all actually on the threshold of Buddha's mind and karmic consciousness. That's where we live. Buddha's mind is right, juxtaposed with us all day long, offering us teachings, And these teachings can pervade karmic consciousness, and they pervade best when we're not pulling or leaning into them or leaning away from them, that we're just in the open door. So perfect wisdom really isn't over on the enlightenment side or the delusion side. It's like the door where enlightenment and delusion are non-dual.

[43:18]

And delusion is liberating enlightenment from itself and enlightenment is liberating delusion from itself. We're actually on the door, but we need to not go back to sleep and remember the door is open and stay upright there. And, of course, that's quite a balancing act. Because new stuff is appearing in one of the worlds all the time, new creative possibilities and confusions are appearing all the time that might tempt us to lean into them. or lean away from them. And new enlightenments are appearing better than before, which are tempting us to go into enlightenment and abide to delusion for at least a while, or perhaps forever. I did, yeah. Yeah, good point. So that's not where we want to... Yeah, so in the Fukanza Zangi, it says something about...

[44:23]

One may escalate the very sky. You have some enlightenment actually. It sounds pretty good. It sounds actually very good. Maybe I even have it here to read to you. Anyway, Dogen Zenji talks about this amazing attainment of tasting something that runs through all things, tasting the wisdom that runs through all things. the way escalating the very sky sounds pretty darn good. And he says you're making the initial partial excursions about the frontier. I think I have it right here. Is it towards the beginning? Yeah. You are playing in the entrance way. But you still are short of the vital way, the path of emancipation. So, when you practice zazen, you are on the threshold and enlightenment occurs.

[45:51]

Hello. Hi. Wow. And if you stay upright, stay on the entranceway. You don't say, I'm going over there. And just walk back and forth. Walking back and forth on that threshold is the path to develop, to endlessly develop the path of total emancipation. So, this is, you're in the right place, but if you, if you think, okay, like you said, you may want to escalate the very sky. Don't escalate the very sky. Stay at the threshold and just walk back and forth. Keep practicing there. Keep tasting the wisdom that runs through your veins and just keep doing that. And this is the place to develop it. So on a daily basis, over and over. I also mentioned somebody said to me who came to introductory instruction here at Green Gulch, and he asked me a little bit later, he said, when you get to the goal, do you have to keep doing the practice?

[46:59]

And I said, well, it's like, you don't have to keep doing it. You want to keep doing it. That's one of the great things about getting to the goal is you really, now you know that what you always thought you wanted to do, you can do. And you really, now you're sure you'll never lose interest in walking back and forth at the gateway of enlightenment, which is also the gateway of delusion. So you don't cut yourself off from all deluded beings. You're not trying to get away from them. You're not trying to get away from your delusion. You are open to it, and you're open to emancipation. You're on the threshold of developing the path of total emancipation. It isn't like you get there, the enlightenment appears, and then you go off into the stratosphere with awakening. You stay in the body of Zazen with your posture and breathing. And also, there's a kind of a poem by Eijo Zenji, which sounds a little bit like this going away.

[48:18]

He says, trust everything to inhalation and exhalation, and then leap into the treasury of light. Leap into the treasury of perfect wisdom. That sounds a little bit like you leap in there, but I don't think that's what it means. I think you leap into your wisdom body. You don't go away from your breathing in and breathing out. You trust your breathing in and breathing out completely. You leap into the light of perfect wisdom, and then you trust everything to your breathing in and breathing out. You're always taking care of this body and other bodies completely, and in that complete care, you leap. And then you take complete care and leap. Okay? Thank you, Linda. That's a nice connection. Yes, Julian.

[49:19]

If you're staying on this special Walking back and forth, yeah? Why isn't this abiding on the threshold? Why isn't it? Because you're in communication with non-abiding. You're on the threshold of abiding. And you're on the threshold of abiding. You're actually between the threshold of abiding and non-abiding. Karmic consciousness is normally abiding. So you've got abiding right here. It's not like you go to non-abiding and never see abiding again. The abiding mind is right touching your cheek. And you're not shrinking away from it, even though you have history of shrinking away from it or trying to get a hold of it. The abiding mind is here. That's karmic consciousness.

[50:19]

...mind of perfect wisdom is right there. You're not leaning into either side. You don't abide in abiding. You don't abide in non-abiding. That's why, again, we have the vow to say... ...abiding. You don't really practice compassion towards emptiness... You practice it towards feelings and emotions. So the vow to benefit all beings is there kind of in the middle. So you don't go away from the realm of abiding into the realm of non-abiding. That would be another abiding. Perfect wisdom comes to meet the abiding and it saves all abiding beings. And the way it's saying it is by bringing them away from abiding, but by bringing wisdom into the abiding and making them understand that there's really no way to abide, and really there's no way to suffer.

[51:33]

We can't get a hold of suffering. But that doesn't mean we look away from it. Is that kind of clearer? Getting there, yeah. Yeah, way in the back. Way in the back. New you? So all beings, wherever they are, and in whatever situation they're encountering, are on the threshold of enlightenment and non-enlightenment. That was fine. Yeah. That's it. That's it. And that's it is on the threshold between the two. is to attempt to remain mindful in the zazen of the moment, right?

[52:47]

Yeah. Okay. And it said, the poet Rumi, he said, so another version of the two worlds is the world of sentient beings and Buddhas. Everybody lives on the threshold between sentient beings and Buddhas. Everybody lives on the threshold between self and other. Different versions of the world. And Prajnaparamita says, from where does the bodhisattva step forth into perfect wisdom? And the answer in one place is the triple world. They go from the triple world into perfect wisdom. Triple world means the of karmic consciousness. You go to perfect wisdom from karmic consciousness. But it turns out you don't have to go far.

[53:52]

You just sort of like turn your face in the other direction for a minute. The definition of the two worlds is the world of form and the world of emptiness. The world of form, feeling, perceptions, formations, and consciousness, that world. The world of body, feelings, and so on, that's one world. And then the world of emptiness, those are the two worlds. Eat. emptiness is form emptiness is feeling feeling is emptiness right there is where we live and zazen is to practice that place to find your place to find your your time and place right there yes abiding So abiding is opposed to non-abiding or to not abiding.

[54:56]

So is abiding and not abiding in the realm of, in the relative realm? And that non-abiding is beyond comprehension, beyond imagination? Is the non-imagination of wisdom still one side of the threshold, and imagine to wisdom is the other side, and both abiding and not abiding are on the imaginary? I would say, now I would say that, did you say abiding and not abiding? Not abiding. Yeah, not abiding. You could say it was like, I'm not in San Francisco now. And I am in Green Gulch. I'm abiding in Green Gulch and I'm not abiding in San Francisco. I'm abiding in happiness. I'm not abiding in depression. I am abiding in depression. I'm not abiding in happiness. Great realistically. That's karmic consciousness. And in that realm, we usually start practicing.

[55:58]

And the more we're in that realm, the more we find the place where that realm meets perfect wisdom. So we learn in the realm of our imagination, where there seems to be abiding and not abiding. There seems to be abiding... I'm abiding in ethics. I'm not abiding in ethics. I'm abiding in ethics. Because I want to. And I'm very happy about that. That's conventional wisdom. That's not really wisdom. That's actually just ordinary imagination. I imagine that... I imagine, I feel, I want to practice ethics. I want to practice in a way that's beneficial. And I feel like I'm doing it, so I'm happy. And when I don't, I feel unhappy. That's the realm of karmic consciousness. And by practicing there, we get more and more upright and ready to open up.

[57:00]

And when we open to not abiding, we're opening to the non-abiding, which was always right standing next to us the whole time. But because we weren't wholehearted enough and upright enough with our ethics practice, we didn't notice it. But the non-abiding was right there. The actual non-abiding, when we first enter it, it is imaginative wisdom. When we first see it, when we first see non-abiding, it's imaginative wisdom. When we even give up the image of non-abiding and the teachings of the perfection of wisdom as they appear to us, then we enter the non-imaginative wisdom. And then the non-imaginative wisdom has the fruit or the reward of manifesting the ability to look back in the other direction to abiding and not abide. ...look back at karmic consciousness now and to actually display itself there.

[58:05]

So the invisible realization has the fruit of being able to manifest appearances in karmic consciousness to facilitate... Pardon? Were you asking about the preparatory wisdom? Yeah, preparatory wisdom is actually not just the preparations you do, but it's when the preparations come to fruit. So part of the preparation for preparatory, it's preparatory to non-imagination. So you could actually have some wisdom which prepares you for non-imaginative wisdom. Yes. Yes. and understanding them. Did you have your hand raised, Susan? Oh, excuse me. Remind me right after, Susan, that there's a request from the kitchen.

[59:10]

Is the kitchen still here? Okay. Yes. Yeah. Yes. Yes. And one of the noted verses of Soto Zen is written by a Soto Zen master named Hongzhi, which is called the Lancet, Puncture Needle of Zazen. And it starts out by saying, the essential pivot of every Buddha, the pivoting essence of every ancestor. There's a pivot there that every Buddha uses. Or we call this threshold. Or we call... Yeah, it's the pivot, actually, where you turn from form and emptiness, form and emptiness, that pivot, that turning.

[60:16]

Does the kitchen have any questions? I request questions from the kitchen. To be invited. Kitchen questions? Yes. Kitchen question. You could say it's a definition of it, and you could also say that is its function. Function of Zazen. So again, in Zen we use the word Zazen. In other schools they say saving all beings. So Buddha says the function of a Zen priest, the job of a Zen priest is to save all beings. And the way we have to save all beings is this, we call it Zazen. You could like show how to use your body in a way that saves all beings. Yes, kitchen. Using your body that way?

[61:17]

Yeah, that's it, right. And to use your body that way, there would be generosity. There would be very great care of all physical and mental actions. There would be patience in the body. There would be enthusiasm. There would be patience with lack of enthusiasm. There would be concentration. There would be lack of concentration. And there would be the wisdom which allows the pivoting. between form and emptiness. That's what saves all beings. Commitment to form, commitment to feeling, commitment to emotions inwardly and outwardly, so wholeheartedly,

[62:19]

turn on it, and return to its emptiness, back to its form, realizing that they're inseparable, two truths, always turning on each other. There's no emptiness without form, and there's no orphan forms. All forms have their emptiness with them. All forms, all conventional truths, have ultimate truth zapped right onto them. but we have to open to conventional things which are hard to open to. You have to be open to the conventional in order to simultaneously open to the gate, to the ultimate. And so Zazen's right there on that threshold. Yes? Can you talk a little bit about saving all beings? Well, it's okay to... What is it?

[63:33]

It's appropriate to take care of yourself and it's appropriate to enrich yourself and work for your own liberation. That's appropriate. It's just not to be addicted to it. And it's appropriate in this tradition to work for the welfare of others, but don't be addicted to that. Don't abide in an addiction to self-denial. So self-denial and self-care are sometimes really helpful. It just is your wish to care for yourself accompanied by the wish to benefit all beings. So do you really want to benefit all beings, including yourself? or do you really just want to benefit yourself and actually care about the rest of the beings? If so, then it would be appropriate to confess it and see how you feel about it. And if you keep doing that, you might evolve into a somewhat different intention.

[64:36]

But if you're someone who is concerned only for his own welfare, the bodhisattva welcomes that person and doesn't turn away from that person and wants to encourage that person actually to expand their interest because they feel that that way. But they're patient with how long it takes him to expand. Over the years I've been at Zen Center, many wonderful people have come to me and said, you know, I've heard this place is about, you know, the Bodhisattva thing, but I'm really not interested in helping other people. You know, can I stay? Is it okay for me to practice in the Zenda with other people? Because I'm not actually wanted. I don't want to help them. And, yeah. Some ancestors have said, why don't you go away? But I used to say, I think this is a guruish.

[65:39]

I think Suzuki Roshi would welcome me to stay. I think he would. And also I think, you know, a couple of times in the early days when we were really gung-ho, you know, fresh off addictions, saying to Suzuki Roshi, why aren't you more strict with us? And he said, if I stick with you, you'll all leave. So, in a way, you know, he was, I remember, maybe our teacher's too kind to us. Maybe overdoes it. But anyway, pretty good, don't you think? Because Zen Center went on and now we can be more strict. Another time people said, give us something to be more strict. And he said, well, broom storm with the head up.

[66:42]

And I walk around Zen Center and I still see sometimes the broom with the head down. So there's still work to be done. And also the shoes in Cloud Hall. They're going to remodel Cloud Hall. I don't know what it's going to look like when it's done, but now, between now and when they remodel it, we have these shoes that we wear, these little slippers that we wear, sandals that we wear into the bathroom. We walk from Cloud Hall on the wood floor and we put on these other slippers. Do you know what I mean? And then we walk, wash our hands or whatever, and we come back out. And then, would you please put the shoes at the edge of the wood where the wood meets the, where the two worlds meet? Where the wood meets the stone? Would you put the shoes sort of next to each other with the back of the shoes? Told? Lined up? Please. I went in there one time and they were all lined up.

[67:47]

I was impressed. Okay. But sometimes I go in and they are like, wow. I was like, somebody came in and threw them. So if you want to be strict, that's one thing you can work on, is like lining those up. And if nobody's watching, and it's a big mess, you can line them all up so that when people come out, they'll be shocked by the great mindfulness. Kitchen. We have alternatives for gluten-free, and soy-free, and dairy-free, and vegan, and we've done a great effort to make sure everyone's needs are met. And I wonder, I have a very clear connection about wanting to save all beings, and I wonder if this is, if this is happening. Or is it only zazen? I'm not ignoring.

[68:52]

I have a very strong practice, I feel, in an intention of saving all beings, but I don't know if zazen is good for my tongue. Oh, you're wondering if there's an alternative to zazen. Yeah, let's bloated and cramped and achy and... Let's see. The alternative to zazen is to be leaning. Two alternatives to zazen. One is to lean into emptiness, which will make you sick. And the other is to lean into form. So, you have not, when you're not feeling well, you have not yet found your perfect balance. You are actually involved in alternatives to Zazen when you're not feeling well.

[69:55]

But it takes a lot of training to find the balance. Emptiness, like, again, Suzuki Roshi uses the image that emptiness is like salt. If you lean into emptiness, it's like taking, it's too much salt. It's really, it's, what do you call it? It's intolerable. You can't, it's just too much. Straight salt is way too, but you can also over salt and still tolerate it. So too much emptiness is sick, is uncomfortable, and too much form without emptiness is also sick. So you're not the only one who's struggling to find the balanced place. The balanced place is repose and bliss. It's not sick. Even if you have cancer and you find the place of repose and bliss, you can still find the place of repose and bliss. Like our dear friend Steve, he did a really good job of finding his zazen

[71:02]

in his great pain. He really... And he was happy to have that practice. But it was a struggle to balance in that pain. And it's a struggle to balance in less pain. It's a struggle to balance when there's pleasure. So there's not... There are alternatives to Zazen. The alternatives to Zazen are suffering. But to find... To find... To find Zazen is a struggle of trial and error. To find the balance between not caring too much and not caring too little. If you care too much, that's often associated with karmic consciousness. Caring too little is nihilism, is oblivion, and sometimes the teaching of emptiness. If people lean out, they care too little. Nothing bothers them anymore.

[72:03]

It's a kind of liberation, but it's not mature. It's a kind of sickness. But also leaning too much, caring too much is also a sickness. Caring greatly is the bodhisattva way. We care greatly, but we have to be balanced. otherwise we get sick. If you don't care at all, you may not be very sick, but you're not very alive either. If you're alive, you care. If you care a lot, that's a bodhisattva, and the bodhisattva tries to balance between form and emptiness. And that's really, that's the way to learn that. But it takes, you know, like I just told you a couple days ago, I thought I was out of tune with you, And that thought, I kind of leaned into that thought and I got kind of sick. And then I kept working on it and I kind of got balanced. I still have the thought that maybe I'm not with your suffering, with your practice, maybe I'm not in accord.

[73:04]

I still, that thought may come up. But if I don't abide in it, I can continue to practice the way. So thank you for your question. Keep going, looking for that, looking onward into the... ...on the threshold. Yeah. I think there is often a misunderstanding when we say zazen that it is only sitting on the cushion. And I think that is really hard for people, but there are other ways to get there. You can do walking meditation, you can work. I mean, we have a lot... Yeah, like I said, there are many opportunities for non-abiding everything is an opportunity for non-abiding means everything is an opportunity for zazen. And so, the nice thing about the zazen practice is we can all do it together. But when we go out of the zendo, we can continue the practice of non-abiding as we spread out in the valley and spread out in the world.

[74:10]

Wherever we are, whatever is happening is an opportunity for zazen. But Some people is an opportunity for zazen until they go into the zendo. Then they go, oh yeah, all right. That they notice, they go in the zendo and they notice in the ritual, oh, I'm abiding. Oh, okay. the Zendo is a place to, is like a hot house to help people discover non-abiding and then extend it into daily life. Again, that's what Sukha Rishi talked about all the time. He kind of said, it's kind of easy to find, you know, our imperturbable mind in the Zendo, but our real practice is to extend it out of the Zendo. Yes. Yes. I'm thinking about the word care.

[75:14]

And in one sense, when we care, we're talking about caring too much, but also, I've heard you use the phrase to take care of or care for as a way to not abide. Can you talk about the distinction? To take care... Yeah, so... if we learn to take care wholeheartedly, in the wholeheartedness of taking care, we will discover non-abiding. I don't know what you mean by take care. Well, for example, when you're exhaling, to trust everything in your life to the exhale. That's caring for the exhale 100%. And then the inhale, care for the inhale with everything in your life with the inhale. Care for this body.

[76:18]

Trust everything in your life to the body exhaling. Trust everything in your life to the body inhaling. And to do this, you know, I feel okay about trusting everything to do this if I'm doing this for the sake of benefiting all beings. It's not just for me. And in that way, we enter wisdom. And we don't care too much or too little. And if we do care too much, we maybe notice that there's still stress. We're trying too hard to trust the exhale. We're forcing ourselves too much for doing it. It's caring too much for taking care of the exhale. It's caring too much for taking care of the in-breathing body. By trial and error we find the full effort without overdoing it. Of course, without underdoing it. But some people, they like to overdo it because then they can't be criticized for underdoing.

[77:24]

And some people like to underdo it because they don't want to be criticized for being a good boy. When one cares too much, is that a You might not be addicted to it, actually. You might be usually addicted to making things under-meaningful and just temporarily have switched over into over-meaningful. When you get off track, it doesn't mean that you're addicted. Actually, being off, not caring too much isn't really being off unless you're abiding in it. I think you can be practicing non-abiding and still make mistakes. Mistakes then become other opportunities for non-abiding. Yeah, so you can be on the mark and not abide. You can be off the mark and not abide.

[78:28]

But actually, yeah, go ahead. Sort of being on and off is in the realm of karmic consciousness. We're on and off. We can abide in being on and off. We can be... Yeah. Or we can not. Yes? First, I just wanted to express appreciation for something that, sharing that Konejo passage about reading papers. And my early trainings in the Korean tradition, we called Soshin, the translation, about them leaping like a tiger while sitting. So I think I just learned where we were leaping. And the other was earlier when you were talking about Asanga, the phrase came into karmic consciousness, preparing the mind ground, the Vajrayana phrase.

[79:33]

I wonder if you could, you've addressed this already in some of your points, but I wondered if you had any response to that phrase, preparing the mind ground. I feel that all these practices prepare the mind ground. Serving Buddhas, developing unshakable resolution, all are your deepest intentions. practicing the bodhisattva training methods and listening to the teachings over and over. Those prepare the mind ground for... Is that enough for this morning? Yes? No kitchen people? Yes? Do you have to look for it?

[80:42]

No, you don't have to look for it. But you do have to listen to everything, including the teaching that you're walking back and forth on the threshold. You have to listen to that. You can also listen to somebody saying you're not walking back and forth on the threshold. You do need to listen But you don't need to add to it. And if certain kinds of thinking arises in your mind, you need to listen to it. Does that make sense? But you don't have to think this thought or that thought. But when you do think this thought, if you want to be a bodhisattva, you kind of need to listen to it. And if somebody else says something to you, you kind of need to listen to it, if you want to be like Avalokiteshvara. He doesn't like saying, no, I'm not going to listen to that. So when you hear these teachings, you listen to them. And you hear other teachings. And... Does that make sense?

[81:45]

Yes. At one point... After you were talking about Avalokiteshvara living in the center of all suffering, and before you started talking about the threshold, the phrase you said, you have to say what you really want. Yeah. And when I heard it, it stood out, but it seemed kind of unconnected to other things. Well, you have to say your vow. You have to say your vow. What you really want. You have to say what's really most important in your life. You have to say that. And in order to say it, you have to discover it. And it might not be clear, but you need to keep asking, what's the most important thing in life? What's my ultimate concern in life? We need to ask ourselves that. And then sometimes we see it, and it seems, yeah, I think that may be it. And then you need to say it. So that poem, he could have said, you need to discover and then say it.

[82:54]

And then you could even say, you need to say it with the Sangha witnessing you too to make it really strong. So that's why we discover the Bodhisattva vow and we say it and we say it with witnesses so that it can serve us most fully. It feels like remembering this vow is maybe a good way to stay less confused when all these other things are coming up that it appears that you want. Say it again? It seems like a way to not be confused, did you say? To not be confused by all the other things that appear to be things that you might want. Right. That's actually part of what makes the saying of what you really want most effective is to be aware that there are conflicting agenda.

[84:02]

If you wish to live for the welfare of all beings and you don't see any contradictory intentions, that's kind of an immature situation. You're more mature when you realize, oh, I actually don't want to live with the welfare of beings. I mean, there's that voice too. Actually, it's more realistic. Because you know, I want this, but there's other voices. And they don't need me to make vows. They're powerful already. They've been going on for a long time. Survival. Me first. You don't need people that. That little girl, she... I have yet heard her say, you did it. She says, I did it. I did it. My mommy. My mommy. Nobody taught her that somehow.

[85:04]

It's built in, you know, to consciousness that I own these things. I do these things. We have to develop this new agenda, which is this vow, and they're still conflicting things, so being aware of them to not being pulled by them. We don't actually, yeah, we don't want to be pulled by them. And they have power. Yes, Peter? You've been using Zazen as a kind of center and I've been thinking about it this week and I sort of feel like I remember that young lady's quote who spoke about difficulty with Zazen and I'm wondering because if I review the years of sitting in that posture and as upright as I can be in paying attention.

[86:06]

I would say the majority of it, even though I do it every day, is not pleasant. And then there are periods of bliss and several periods of absolute dropping away of body and mind, which is not an exemption from the misery returning. It seems to me, in my experience, it's far easier for me to be centered and tranquil in the midst of the world, even its violence and confusion, than it is sitting in that posture. So I'm wondering which parts of those experiences are Zazen, and then what is the rest? when you're out in the situation where you say, very dynamic, lots of change, you know, not sitting still in a zendo, it sounds like you have perhaps moments of... I'm not concerned with that experience.

[87:27]

I'm concerned with sitting in the zendo on the cushions I know, I know, but I'm just saying, it sounds like part of the reason you're not concerned with that is because you find some success in those situations. Yes. Yeah. And your success might be a little bit of this pivot, this freedom, that you find some freedom in those situations. Yes. Yeah. And if you're free, you're not so concerned. You're concerned about coming into Zendo. That's why we have the Zendo here for you. So you can come and test your freedom in that form. That's what it's here for. And you're availing yourself of it. We're happy that you're here. Coming and doing where it's hard for you to find the dropping off. That's what it's for. And for other people, they have an easier time dropping off in their

[88:27]

than they would if they go with you to some of the situations you go in where you're happily dropping off. I mean, you're happily enjoying dropping off. So for him, he's happy to be in the zendo with body and mind dropping off. For him, that was the easier situation. So he was saying, but the point of this is to go out into the situations you're talking about and find the drop. So you've been spending your time in both situations and you're, thank you very much, telling us that you have a hard time finding that same freedom and non-abiding in a body that's following this kind of form. That's the point of this But some people primarily find it in that form and they can't find it when they go out initially.

[89:28]

But we want them to. So the point is to go back and forth between the two. And so here you are testing your freedom in this form. And you'll go out and test your freedom again. And yeah, so this is... Well, I would also have to say that I never had the experience that freedom in the world until after I began Zazen practice, visible as it may be. People actually do have that freedom in the world and then they come to Zen and suddenly they're not free anymore. And some then say, I'm out of here. I'm going back to where I was free. And some stay. The thing is that, you know, leaping, leaping.

[90:30]

We keep leaping. So you leap from the zendo into the street. You leap from the street back into the zendo. We do not stay. We leap beyond, what is it called, abundance and lack. If you're in lack, you leap beyond there into abundance. If you're in abundance, you leap beyond back into lack. The Buddha way is fundamentally leaping, always going beyond. So if you're in the street and you're cool, zendo. If you're in the zendo, okay, let's go outside. Back and forth testing, you know. Hakuen used to take his monks out into the streets, used to have them come out of the zendo and get on horseback and ride through the marketplace to see if they could keep zendo composure. And if they could, then back into the zendo, back and forth, testing the non-abiding, all different situations. Any other?

[91:34]

Yes? I have a small confession, which is I don't really like to see the present as in read what I call a hard text and sutras. Yeah. And do you think it's disingenuous to say I'm committed to this path, to say I'm living for the benefit of all beings if I like to get it from you and from teachings rather than... No, I don't think so necessarily. In the time of the Buddha... Nobody was reading any texts. They were just listening to the teacher. And the teacher's senior students, there was no texts. They just listened to it. And in the La Zen monasteries, traditionally, they were just listening to their teacher. And sometimes their teacher was reciting the Heart Sutra or something, but they were mostly listening. So you don't have to be a reader. And actually, Asanga says, those who enters are those who have a lot of hearing.

[92:38]

The word hearing also means learning. They listen. They can read too, and he wrote stuff, but it's mostly, you know, it can be all hearing. You don't have to read. But reading's another way. I really appreciate that. On Sunday, when you were talking about abiding, after all these years I've heard you talk, it was as though it was the first time I felt like a total fool. It was so exciting. I'm like, this is amazing. And then I thought, how can it be so new? ...in different forms for 20 years. I couldn't tell if I was just a complete idiot or so in the present moment. It was a little unsettling, but it was rivetingly new, even though I've heard it many times. That's Zen for you. I see Jean. Did you ever hand praise Tyler?

[93:39]

actually just on the question of reading yeah I was wondering where you would tell me to look for something to read about the six perfections well I will provide a reading list on the six perfections and make it available to the practice period with the aid of my trusty assistant okay it will be available soon as your local bookstore. Brenda. . It feels really good to listen to you talk, but I wonder something about believing within compassion, like particularly helping people, and burning out, and maybe being too generous in certain ways, or too gracious.

[94:50]

Yeah, caring too much. And getting fried. And getting fried. Caring too much, you get fried. In our modern, as we say, litiginous world, people want to go for caring too much because then you can't get sued for caring too little. But you get fried for caring too much. That's what this teaching is for. This teaching is for those who wish to help people in professions. We need to learn to not abide in our caring, otherwise we'll get fried and we're going to run away from the people we want to help. Because it's not that they're frying us, it's our abiding and our caregiving that fries us. Burnout comes from attaching to the work. So that's what this practice is for, is to teach you to continue to care a lot, without overdoing it and, you know, by doing it so much that no one could ever say you weren't doing it enough.

[95:55]

Yeah. Yeah. One of the things that comes up and that often comes up is if you're practicing generosity, People don't get compatible with boundaries. And then we have the term setting boundaries. But I might change it just slightly to giving boundaries. Boundaries are one of the main gifts to give in the process. Like you don't feed children too much sugar, maybe. You don't let them stay up too late before they start taking their bath and getting their pajamas on. Otherwise, it's going to be really difficult. So you actually give them a boundary as a gift to help them. And you say no.

[96:59]

And you do it as a gift, not to control, but to promote Zazen. You say no to promote Zazen. You say no to promote Zazen. not abiding. And you check to see if you're really not abiding when you give the gift of no. Or are you using no as a way to get control? And if you are, be kind to yourself and try to find a way to say it where it's not controlling. Where it's really just an offering. And you don't have control of it. You don't have control of yourself. The three worlds are pure. Giver, receiver, and gift are all empty. That's the non-abiding way of helping people. And you get off. You feel the stress. I got off. I'm stressed here. I'm getting on the edge of burning out, okay. Give yourself a boundary to stop, step back, and find the place of practice again.

[98:05]

This is easy to say. Anything else? Oh, Jean? I appreciated the little mantra that you gave us earlier. And I realized that I developed one for myself that I would share with the group. I'm one of the people who grows into this. I know I'm fine with this. you know, sort of the coming-up-tour and confessions happening more vividly than in a sort of out-and-out, right? And so there's... But I can take it a little too seriously. So what I've done is... I don't know if you're familiar with the Homer Simpson, you know, show. There's a way that... I am somewhat familiar with that. Someone gave me some Homer Simpson slippers. Now, when he comes up short, he says, just so that I don't take this awful seriously when I'm heading back to the Zen.

[99:08]

I wonder who was making that sound. I just sort of renamed it the Zen. Oh, I see. Yeah, I remember one of our members said to me, when she first came into the Zen to a Green God, she went in, she stepped inside the door and she said, she thought, oh, this is a room where you can make a mistake. just reminded me when my granddaughter was here she's four years old and very large i took her into the zendo and she's been in a different zendo a bright zendo in brooklyn but she knew we were going into zendo but we went in it was very dark there was one person sitting on the floor very quietly and she Where are we? With that, may I...

[100:05]

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