So, today I'd like to begin by talking about the 39th ancestor in our lineage, Yunzhu Daoyin. Yunzhu is the name of the mountain that he set up or sat on top of to teach, and Daoyin is the monk's name. I'll be reading stories from, primarily, the book which is called The Transmission of the Light, which was compiled by the 51st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th ancestor, Keizan Jokin Daiyosho.

[01:12]

So, this 39th patriarch, Daoyin, studied with Dengxian. And the case of this entry in the book of Transmission of the Light says that Dengxian asked Daoyin, what is your name? And Daoyin said, Daoyin. And Dengxian said, say it from beyond. And Daoyin said, if I speak from beyond, I cannot say that I am Daoyin.

[02:27]

And Dengxian said, that is the same answer I gave when I was with Yunyen. A fairly simple story, right? And it's a little bit complicated, though, what's actually going on here for a number of reasons. One is that, as I'll show you in the text, it depicts the first meeting between Dengxian and Daoyin, and then it says that after this initial encounter, that the one I just read

[03:37]

to you then occurs. So this main story here of the relationship between these two people is said to have occurred as, sort of, the conclusion of their first dialogue. However, it also says, at the end of this section of the book, that this same dialogue happened when Daoyin entered the teacher's room to receive Dharma transmission. So one possibility is that this dialogue happened, this fairly straightforward dialogue happened

[04:38]

between them upon their first meeting, and then the dialogue was repeated at the time that Daoyin formally received the transmission of the teaching. Another possibility is that it's a mistake in the text, that they don't really mean, or they don't mean to imply here, that this dialogue happened right after the first dialogue, that there was a space of number of years between the first dialogue and then the story which I just told you. Another thing that occurs to me about this story is that it's pretty straightforward, especially the first part about, what's your name? And he says, my name is Daoyin.

[05:38]

I could imagine asking some of you, what's your name? And you might say, oh, my name is Daniel or my name is Martina. And then I would say to you, say it from beyond. And I could imagine some of you saying, if I speak from beyond, I cannot say that my name is Daniel. I could imagine you saying that. Seems possible. And I could even imagine myself saying, that was the same answer I gave when I was with Shogaku Shinryu. Daoyin.

[06:57]

Daoyin left home to become a monk when he was still young. He became a fully ordained monk when he was 24 and his teacher had him study the scriptures of the individual vehicle, the vehicle of the saints. But he didn't like them, so he left them and went traveling. And he arrived at Sui Wei Monastery and asked about the way from the teacher, Sui Wei. It so happened that a monk arrived from Yuchan and vividly recounted Dengshan's teachings. And in the end, Daoyin went to Dengshan and Dengshan asked him, where do you come from? And Daoyin answered, I come from Sui Wei.

[08:13]

Dengshan says, what does Sui Wei say to his students? Daoyin said, one time Sui Wei was making offerings to the arhats, to the saints. And I asked, you are making offerings to the arhats, but do you think they will come and accept the offerings? Sui Wei asked me, what do you eat every day? After hearing the story, Dengshan asked Daoyin, did he really say that? And Daoyin said, yes. And Dengshan said, you didn't meet that adept in vain. And it says, that then he said to Daoyin, what's your name, and so on.

[09:21]

Now, we say these days, Buddhas and ancestors, and we say we have this lineage of all these ancestors, and this is our English translation of a Chinese character which ten years ago we used to say patriarchs, but as part of our ongoing questioning of the abuses of the patriarchy, we thought, how about saying ancestor instead of patriarch? And recently, or a couple of years ago anyway, I met the Zen scholar, Cezanne Yanagida, and he said, well ancestor isn't really such a good translation of that word, although it's one of the things that Chinese character means. It means ancestor, it also means patriarch, it also means founder, and it also means pioneer.

[10:36]

And in China, to use that character for ancestors is okay under certain circumstances, but in the context of Zen practice, to call these people ancestors doesn't quite work, because these people are not just any old ancestors, they're particular ancestors, and they had a particular role as leaders and as founders. So he said that founder would be better than ancestor. If you don't want to use patriarch, how about founder? But I, looking it up in the dictionary, finding pioneer, I like pioneer actually. Pioneer means somebody who goes into some unknown territory or some unclaimed field and

[11:41]

settles or founds a way of practice. So buddhas and pioneers I like. It also of course has this quality of we're kind of pioneers certainly here in the West. Clearly, it often translates to buddhas and Zen adepts. Pioneer is derived from an old French term which means someone, a foot soldier, who's sent in advance to clear the way. And it's derived even further from one who has big feet or broad feet, like sometimes

[12:44]

if we're hiking out of Tassajara in deep snow, it'd be nice to send somebody with big broad feet ahead of you to make a path. This is also the root of the word peon. Peon means that too, it's originally somebody, a foot soldier, who's sent ahead to clear the way. So these people are trailblazers. Each generation opens a new way, clears some new space that hasn't been claimed before, goes into some unknown territory. And here in this original story, although it looks fairly straightforward, this is an example of some words between people that cleared some space in unknown territory. The teacher says, what is your name?

[13:53]

Takes a little step into the unknown, inquiring, what will he say, what will his name be? I wonder what his name is, what's your name? So, he gives back his name, Daoying, then he says, ask it from beyond, say it from beyond, go into the unknown and speak it. Be a pioneer right here, right now. And Daoying does go into the unknown and says, from the unknown, speaking, I cannot say I'm Daoying. And then, Tungshan says, although you have just gone into new, uncharted, unknown areas, you gave the same answer that I did when I was with my teacher.

[14:58]

The feeling of freshness is the same. Here's another story about them, which I think has the same quality of scouting out the unknown together. One day, Tungshan said to Daoying, where have you been? And Daoying said, walking in the mountains. And Tungshan asked him, what mountains are fit to live in? And Daoying said, what mountain is not fit to live on? So, up to here, we have pretty much familiar Zen teaching.

[16:11]

Where have you been? Walking in the mountains. Now he asked, what mountain is fit to live on? Well, according to Genjo Koan, the way starts from here. But this is a suitable place to build our practice. Wherever we are is fit to live on. But now again, the wonderful teacher goes a little further and says, in that case, you have taken over the entire country. A subtle fraud, a little bit further, not too far, but a little bit of a step forward. Can you feel that?

[17:19]

And Daoying says, no, I haven't. I haven't taken over the entire country by saying what mountain is not fit to live on. Then, Tungshan says, if that's so, have you found an empty path? And Daoying said, there is no path. Tungshan said, if there is no path, how could you meet me? Daoying said, if there were a path, we could never have met. Tungshan said, hereafter, not one thousand, not even ten thousand people will be able

[18:30]

to restrain you. Reading this story to you now, I feel that this is a story about telling the truth. It's just my feeling about it. And also, I feel in this story a give and take between two people, an effort to test the space between them. And they seem to have found something really wonderful together. And, reading you this story, I did not plan this story teaching me what it has just taught

[20:02]

me. I did not plan on learning anything from reading you this story, but I feel I did. From what I've studied about the teaching about the fourth precept of no false speech, I feel like this little dialogue is a wonderful example of no false speech. And, if it is a good example, or just an example, then I also feel no false speech takes a lot of attention, a lot of alertness. It takes courage, it takes attentiveness, respect, listening, it takes all that.

[21:10]

And, it gives all that. One day, Tao Ying was accompanying Dung San, and they came to a stream, and Dung San asked Tao Ying, is the water deep or shallow? And Tao Ying said, it's not wet. And Dung San said, course, fellow. And Tao Ying said, how about you, teacher? And Dung San said, not dry. Do you remember that other story about Dung San? He was walking along with his spiritual uncle Mi, and they came to a river, and Dung San said to Uncle Mi, Uncle Mi, how is it upon the occasion of crossing the stream? And Uncle Mi said, the feet don't get wet.

[22:23]

And Dung San said, such a venerable old person as yourself, and you still talk like that? And Uncle Mi says, well, how about you? And Dung San said, the feet are not wet. So, I don't mean to put any pressure on you people, but between the time you heard that story about Uncle Mi and now when you heard the story about Tao Ying, when you've been crossing the river together, has anybody had any conversations with their friends about the occasion of crossing the streams? I have neither. I crossed a stream with some people recently, and I did it in silence, but it was quite an occasion. Now, the first time we crossed, we both took our shoes off. And doing that, I noticed that it was kind of slippery, put my feet on the rocks with the algae on top and so on.

[23:25]

Next time we crossed, I kept my shoes on and she took her shoes off. So from then on, every time I crossed, I had to wait for her to take her shoes off and go across very slowly because it's much more stable to have my shoes on, it wasn't slippery at all with my shoes on. I was kind of dashing through the water with my rubber-soled Nikes. But we didn't talk about it. I'm kind of sorry now. I didn't even think of it. I thought crossing the stream was good enough. It was, but next time, I'll try to have a little dialogue before going across. In the middle's nice too. And then on the other side. Now comes a story about these two guys, which is not so ordinary.

[24:30]

I hesitate to tell it, but, well, I think you can stand it. Don't compare yourself to this now. Or go ahead, compare yourself. So what did happen here? So one time, what's his name, Dongshan, who you remember Dongshan was first recognized by the great teacher Nanchuan when he was a young monk. So Dongshan said, Nanchuan asked a monk what scripture he was reading and the monk answered that he was reading the scripture on Maitreya's appearance in the world. Everybody know who Maitreya is? Maitreya is the name of the Bodhisattva who's living in Tushita heaven.

[25:35]

Everybody know about Tushita heaven? Well, Tushita heaven is one of the best heavens. It's a place where the future Buddha hangs out and all kinds of other wonderful things happen there. It's one of the nearer heavens. So right now, according to Buddhist whatever, the future Buddha, the next Buddha in the next eon is living up in Tushita heaven and this Buddha's name is Maitreya, Bodhisattva or whatever. So Nanchuan asked him what scripture he was reading and this monk's reading a scripture about Maitreya's appearance in the world. And Nanchuan said, this is Dongshan telling Tao Ying about a story about Nanchuan. So then Nanchuan says, will he appear? And the monk said, right now he is in the celestial realm and he will appear in the future. That's what I just told you, the Buddhist story.

[26:40]

Nanchuan said, there is no Maitreya either in the celestial realm or on earth. Tao Ying said to Dongshan, if there is no Maitreya either in the celestial realm or on earth, what does the name mean? Hearing this, Dongshan's seat quaked. And he said, Tao Ying, once when I was with Yunyan, I asked him a question and the fireplace shook. Today, I was asked a question by you and my whole body is dripping with sweat. So sometimes a student makes the teacher's body drip with sweat and shakes his little seat or whatever size seat it may be.

[27:41]

Then Nacchezan says, there is no difference in question and answer between the teacher and the disciple here. Now I want to tell you another story about Tao Ying, one that I encountered when we published a book, Timeless Spring, which I've kept in mind as a precedent for when monks at Tassajara want to go be hermits. So now, after all this happened, right, after they had all this dialogue and relationship and Tao Ying had been recognized as the foremost among all of Dongshan's students and an enlightened disciple, Tao Ying built a hut and did not come to the monastery for ten days.

[28:50]

Dongshan asked him, why don't you come here and eat these days? And Tao Ying said, every day spirits bring me offerings. And Dongshan said, I thought you were an enlightened person, but you still have these kinds of views. Come tonight to visit me. That night, Tao Ying went to Dongshan and Dongshan called out, oh, hermit, Tao Ying. And Tao Ying replied, yes. And Dongshan said, without thinking of good, without thinking of evil, what is it? Tao Ying returned to his hermitage and sat silently in Zazen. After this, the spirit came but could not see him.

[29:54]

After three days, the spirit left. I don't know how much I should say about this, but anyway, this very advanced Zen monk goes out in the woods and celestial beings bring him offerings of some form so he doesn't need food anymore. When his teacher asks him what's going on and he tells him, his teacher says, this way of seeing things is quite surprising coming from someone like you, and gives him this practice of without thinking of good, without thinking of evil, what is it to sit with quietly? And that stops whatever that stuff is. I don't want to explain anything, really.

[31:00]

I leave that with you to think about what does it mean and what does that have to do with being off on your own, being a hermit? And this story is part of why I've been very hesitant about people being hermits at Zen Center. If somebody like this couldn't handle it, then what about people like us? So it makes me wonder if we really need to do that until we really have good understanding. So after the spirits no longer came to feed Tao Ying, one day Deng Shan asked him, what are you doing? And Tao Ying said, I'm making bean paste, miso, right? And Deng Shan said, how much salt are you using?

[32:05]

And Tao Ying said, I added a little. Deng Shan asked, how does it taste? And Tao Ying said, it will do. Someone said that one of the characteristics of Buddhism is that you eat before enlightenment and after. Some people have views about other than this. I think some people think that after enlightenment you wouldn't eat anymore. Therefore, they want to stop eating now. Or after enlightenment, or if you don't eat, maybe you'll get enlightened and then you

[33:09]

won't have to eat afterwards either. Or maybe then you can start eating and really enjoy it. Various theories I've noticed. But it seems like ... Something happening? The candle is leaking? Anyway, I suggest from what I've seen of the way of the Buddhism, Zen pioneers, they eat before and after awakening. It doesn't mean you have to stuff yourself incessantly, but that's why we have a Tenzo Ryo. That's why we have a kitchen, is to feed people before and after enlightenment. And you can't tell who's who by whether they're eating or not. Another time, Dungshan said to Tao Ying, if someone completely without Buddha nature commits

[34:22]

the five unpardonable crimes, how could she take care of her parents? Five unpardonable crimes are to, I think, kill a Buddha, kill your parents. I don't know if there's two, like kill your mother's one and kill your father's another one, I don't remember. Create a split in the Sangha and claim enlightenment without a certificate. Just kidding. To claim enlightenment without proof. And you know one of the main proofs of enlightenment is eating. What's up, Doc? I'm enlightened. Anyway, if a person completely without Buddha nature commits these five deadly sins, how

[35:27]

can this person take care of his parents, having killed them? Tao Ying says, this person observes filial piety for the first time. After this, Dungshan gave his complete approval and made him head monk of the monastery. So, I think those stories were pretty much the sequence, and you can see some development there perhaps. And... That brings me back to the first story again. So, we're being told that there's this sequence about what I just demonstrated, and then it

[36:31]

says that after all that, then when Tao Ying entered the pioneer's room for Dharma transmission and to receive the Dharma intact, Dungshan made a point of asking him, what's your name? And of course, if it's this time, they've been together for quite a while, he knows his name. In any case, he's making a point to ask him something he already knows, and perhaps he's also repeating the earlier dialogue. And Tao Ying says Tao Ying again. Keizan says, even if he were asked over and over, countless times, he would still have to say Tao Ying.

[37:33]

It would still be Tao Ying. Tao Ying made no excuses, and even though Dungshan did not disagree with this response, in order to help him, in order to help him tell whether or not Tao Ying had the capacity to pass through barriers and escape convention, he said, say it from beyond. And again, Keizan says, this guy, Tao Ying, lacked discriminating consciousness now. He was like someone whose face is missing, or a straw dog, and he said, if I say it from beyond, then I cannot say I am Tao Ying.

[38:35]

And again, Keizan says, this is extremely difficult to reach, and if a student has not reached this realm, she lacks the power to proceed. She will still be confused by false views. Because Tao Ying guarded this realm, this difficult-to-reach realm, carefully, he was able to have this conversation about this person without Buddha nature who commits the five unpardonable sins. Now, when I say things like this, I think, oh, maybe people will get discouraged when

[39:39]

they hear how difficult it is to reach this realm. And in fact, isn't it difficult when someone says to you, if someone who lacks Buddha nature kills her parents, how will they take care of their parents? It's difficult maybe for you to imagine being able to say, that's really taking care of your parents. It's not so easy to say that. It's the same realm as, what's your name? Tao Ying. So it's extremely difficult to reach, but it's very close to where you already are. Because if someone asks you what your name is, don't you say Daigon or Eva? That's what he said. And if you guard that state of ordinariness, you perhaps will be able to not be caught

[40:42]

by convention. In the end, Kaizong says, what can I say today so that you will fully understand this story? And after a while he says, never has it been bound to names and forms. How can you speak of beyond a relative? So there's the stories about Tao Ying and Tung Shan. Tao Ying was the disciple of Tung Shan whose lineage has survived.

[41:46]

Tung Shan had other disciples and one of the other disciples was named Cao Shan. And Cao Shan was a great scholar and very famous. As a matter of fact, the name of the school is made by using Tung Shan's name and Cao Shan's name. The school is called the Cao Dung School in China or Soto. They used Cao Shan's name because Cao Shan was very famous. Tao Ying was not famous. His lineage is the vital lineage of Soto Zen, but he was not famous. Therefore, the school was not named after him along with his teacher. And someone said, the reason why he's not famous was because this thing he took care of, this realm of, what's your name? Tao Ying. This realm, nobody ever gets famous for taking care of that. He was a wonderful pioneer.

[42:51]

He took care of the real life of Buddhadharma, but nobody's interested. And nobody should be, even though it's exactly what we must take care of. It's not a matter of interest. It's a matter of telling the truth. That's all. So, of course, I want the stories of the 39th pioneer to fit in with the fourth precept because that's what I'm talking about now. But I think they help me out. I think these people were speaking the truth. I don't think this story is a false speech. I don't see any lies in these stories. Sometimes seeming ordinary, sometimes seeming extraordinary. But anyway. May I have your permission to not talk about the fourth precept?

[44:03]

If you want to uncross your legs or something, make yourself more comfortable, that's fine with me. You have my permission? You have permission, yes. I have your permission, too. Okay. The fourth precept is called no false speech. Has all inclusively turned. There is no excess. There is no deficiency. One complete moistening of sweet dew bears fruit as actuality and truth. This is his instruction on receiving and teaching this precept.

[45:06]

Again, one moistening of sweet dew. The Dharma wheel has exclusively, all inclusively turned. There is no excess. There is no deficiency. One complete moistening of sweet dew bears fruit as actuality and truth. Another translation is the Dharma wheel turns from the beginning. There is neither surplus nor lack. The whole universe is moistened with nectar. The truth is ready to harvest. Kyogo says, when we establish true and false as two and try to get rid of the false and

[46:20]

take hold of the true, we are thus separated from the realm of truth. We have attained birth in human form and met the correct Dharma. We should clearly understand the principle of true and false. Without knowing true and false, we love the false because we love the false. We don't dislike it. Or we may understand the false and dislike it. This is to know about disliking without clarifying the false. Just to love the false is not to know the false. And even to dislike the false is also not to know the false.

[47:25]

When we love the false, we don't know the truth. We should know that when false speech occurs, sentient beings and the great earth speak falsely at the same time. When no false speech occurs, sentient beings and the great earth are all no false speech. This being so, on the face of transmigration in birth and death, there is a speck of dust that is not false speech. In the light of Buddha's eye, as Buddha's wisdom, there is not one thing that is not truth. Thus truth and false are not two things.

[48:33]

You should not seek the true outside the false. Indeed, if you seek in such a way, you cannot attain it. That is to say, there is nothing but no false speech. Not two, not three. The reason for this is Buddhas and pioneers in the ten directions speak entirely the same sound with one mouth. When we understand that Buddhas of the three worlds expound the Dharma in the midst of fierce flames, we do not say that they turn the Dharma wheel only by verbal karma, since

[49:39]

the Buddhas expound the Dharma also by body and eyes. As soon as we understand this, we also understand that they expound the Dharma by fierce flames. Therefore, Dogen says, the Dharma wheel has all inclusively turned. As there is no two or three outside of no false, it says no excess, no deficiency. As it is the sweet dew of one vehicle, we say one complete moistening. Not relying on Buddhas skillful speech is called attaining the truth and attaining actuality.

[50:51]

Do not forget about this principle. The truth and false of the common world cannot be held even if they are correct. For example, saying the world is fire is false speech for those who are born in the realm of water. If you say that the world is water, that is true for those who are born in the realm of water. If you say to fish that the water is palace, it is true for them but false for God because God sees the water as lapis lazuli. If you say to hungry ghosts the water is water, it is false because for them water is fire. In this way, what is true for human beings is false for fish.

[52:19]

This is the same for Gods and hungry ghosts. In this way, if we describe a palace, lapis lazuli, fire or water by means of a view that is based on karma, it is false for the Buddhas. For this reason, we should not take the view of different beings as a basis but should follow the Buddhas view. Thus, false and true speech should not be based on our own view. To see mountains is to understand mountains. To see rivers is to understand rivers. This is correct speech in the common world. To see a tree is to understand grass. This is false speech in the common world.

[53:22]

On the other hand, even if you describe not seeing as seeing, even if you describe hearing as not hearing, these are all things of the common world. Therefore, they are false. However, false speech is common in the world. However, false speech in the common world results in suffering and evil destinies. The fruit of no false speech is that the things perceived by humans and devas, although looking like bliss, are not bliss. From the point of view of the three evil destinies, the human realm is bliss.

[54:30]

But from the point of view of Buddha's realm, the human realm is filled with all the pains of birth, old age, sickness and death. We should truly attain the correct view and arrive at the Buddha fruit. Obtaining birth among humans and devas, we should understand the gain and loss of false speech and no false speech. If we do not hear or see the body and mind, false speech is a mistake of our lifetime. It is a great loss. Those who clarify this immediately reach the rank of all Buddhas, the rank equal to the greatly enlightened one. Rinzai Zen

[56:20]

When my Zen teacher came to Green Gulch, who I became pretty good friends with, his name was Taitsu Konoroshi, and he lectured on the Mumonkan. And one of the cases he lectured on, I don't know, it just stuck with me and I felt like today I would read it, even though I can hardly see it. It's the 24th case of the Mumonkan and it's called Feng Shui's Equality and Differentiation. A monk asked the priest Feng Shui, speech and silence are concerned with equality and differentiation. How can I transcend equality and differentiation? Feng Shui said, I always think of Chiang Nan in late March.

[57:32]

The partridge chirped among the many fragrant flowers. So, that's what I have to offer. If there's anything else you'd like to do other than go back and sit, I'm open to it, but we could also stop if you'd like. Yes? How can we ever know the truth of what is truthful, if it's only truthful to that truth? We can't escape happiness, that's our point of view. So, even if the Buddha's truth is not the truth of the Buddha's. Your point of view, right? Maybe.

[58:50]

But Buddha's point of view is not your point of view. So, what's Buddha's point of view like, if Buddha is a person and we're instructed not to see our own point of view? How does it say it? Anyway, our karma, your karma is currently to be a woman, of a certain age, and so on, and any view we have that's based on karma is false for Buddha's. Buddha's view is not based on their karma, although Buddha still would have a view based on karma, just like we do. Hmm? Yeah, so what's a Buddha's view? A Buddha's view is a view that's not based on karma, right? But if you try to get away from the view based on karma, that would be another view based on karma, right?

[59:58]

Does that make sense to you? Got a view based on karma? Okay, now let's have a view not based on karma. That's totally based on karma, because you make that in relationship to the one ... It's just more karma. Just move over here and make one that's not based on karma. It's another karmic view, all right? Buddhas can do that too. They can have views based on karma and then they can have anti-karma views too, which are just fancy, confusing, on top of confusing. So, with all that going on, how do we transcend and have a Buddha view? Well, one thing is to listen to the teaching that says, how about, for this reason we should take the view different ... we should not take the view of different beings as a basis, but should follow the Buddha's view. What's a Buddha's view?

[61:00]

The monk says, how can I transcend equality and differentiation, silence and speech? The views of humans, the views of animals, the views of gods, how can I transcend all these different views? The teacher says, I always think of late March at Tassajara. The songbirds are still here. The stream is noisy. There's wildflowers all over the place. Is that Buddha's view? Is that not Buddha's view? What do you think? Is there anything ... That's what it says at the beginning here, you should not ...

[62:08]

you should not try to get rid of false speech, right? When we establish true and false as two and try to get rid of the false and take hold of the true, we are thus separated from the realm of truth. So there's always some view. To try to get rid of the view is no good, even if it's a false view. If it's a true view, to try to hold on to it won't work either. There's no absolute truth. But there is a truth. And that's not an absolute truth, like what I just said. And what is speech in accord with that? Are you and I speaking the truth? Are you and I practicing no false speech right now? Are we sitting in the middle of fierce flames right now,

[63:17]

expounding the Dharma? And on the fierce flames we're sitting in the middle of, also expounding the Dharma. And where do you look and where do I look for a basis to answer that question? Do I look in my views, in my karmic views? Do I look in escape from my karmic views? Where does the Buddha's answer come from? Where does the Buddha's answer come from?

[64:19]

You know, I'm trying, I'm committed and I'm trying to tell the truth. And I think if I tell a lie, I know I'm telling a lie. Sometimes I tell lies and I know I'm telling a lie, that's pretty simple. But what's telling the truth? What's no false speech? Is no false speech some other place from me knowing I'm telling a lie? Is no false speech someplace other from me lying and not even knowing I'm lying? Is it some other place? If I lie and I don't know I'm lying, the whole world is lying.

[65:23]

The whole world is false speech. If I'm lying and I say that was a lie, that's a lie from my point of view. I know from my point of view that was a lie. That's what I know. Is that Buddha's view? It's my view. Why don't I admit my view? How's it going for you, Pam? It's okay.

[66:27]

It's okay? Yes. I'm having a lot of trouble understanding it today and I'm not sure what to do about it. Can you speak some of the truth right now and just tell me, is it alright for me to sit here in this position and not sort of have the future kind of wasted on me? I'm not sure what to do. A lot of trouble. Yes. I do understand what I say.

[67:39]

But somehow I did feel that this is what I wanted to say. Now, trouble, if you'd like to tell me about the trouble you're having. One trouble, just for example, you could just not understand and that could not be a trouble. As a matter of fact, that could be something you could do fairly easily. Maybe effortlessly not understand. Right? But part of you wants to understand maybe and is frustrated. Is that right? And maybe that's part of the hard part, right? I'm not telling you that you should stop giving up wanting to understand. That's your business. And I'm actually sorry if it's painful for you to want to understand and not be able to. I mean, I'm sorry about that. But I wanted to talk about something and I want to continue talking about something that, how would I put it, is not geared primarily so that we people in the room will understand it

[68:50]

and be able to say I understood it. I want to talk about something that doesn't have that much to do with whether we say we understand it or not. I really would like to. And I would like to continue. If you feel like you understand, that's fine too. But so I would recommend that if you want to understand what I'm saying and you can't and you feel frustrated by that, that you just see that that's the problem. The problem is you want it. Like part of me also would like you to understand or would like you to like my lecture. Part of me would like that because then you will like me. And you'll say, oh, that was a good lecture. His lectures were really good during Satsang. And then I'll be famous like some other people because all the students really understood and felt good. But partly I'm talking to somebody, I'm talking to Buddha here in you.

[69:54]

And the person in you may not understand this, but I'm not doing this just so that you won't understand either. But also I would say to you, if it's too hard and you really want me to give a different kind of a talk, I'm amenable to the suggestion and if it's too much, you know, maybe it'd be better just for my talks to be silenced. And those wouldn't be easy to understand either, but at least you wouldn't have to listen to me make all this noise. Yes? Do you want to say something? I think the noise is that noise that Dharma exposes itself. I hope so. I said, it's not just the noise, the Dharma exposes itself.

[71:00]

I think the truth requires a voice and a sweet deal also to hear it. I kind of want to ask you to help me and to actually not deny how you feel as a human being when you hear this kind of teaching. And I'm sorry if it's painful for you what happens to you when you hear this kind of teaching. But I also really believe that somebody is hearing it and I want you to please support that person and let her enjoy this stuff. And the more you let her enjoy it, the more you'll be able to allow yourself to feel the frustration too, that's okay. You can sustain it and you can transcend it. But anyway, as I said yesterday, I think if I do what I had planned that I would imagine that people would, human beings in the room would think,

[72:26]

oh I'm not understanding this and maybe somebody else does and so on and so forth. So in fact you're feeling what I thought some or all of us would feel. Yes? My problem is that I feel every little story is so rich, heavy and full. I cannot take too many. I almost felt bad. You feel overwhelmed by the richness? Yes. Too rich? Too many, one after the other. Yeah, I understand that too. Well, tomorrow I won't give so many stories, I'll just give a few, maybe just one. What? At least three. You want three? At least three. Yes? Also, it's nice when you tell a story and then you tell the same story over and over and over again.

[73:29]

Because in the earlier session you gave lectures in which I didn't understand what you were saying and then you just kept saying the same thing a lot of times and by the time you said it enough times I began to think maybe I understood something more. Right, that's my usual way. And so like for example I spent the whole ten day session on not covering very much ground but going over and over pretty much the same thing. Going over the three refuges over and over and the same stories over and over. Those first two ancestors. Those stories over and over and over. And then the human being feels like, hey, this ain't so bad after all. This is working. This is going deeper and deeper. So I'm intentionally not going so deep in the... From the human point of view I'm going across a lot of material. And going across a lot of material the human being will probably not be able to feel like they're understanding it.

[74:34]

And that I would think would be somewhat difficult. That's why I kind of asked your permission to take this approach which I think from the human point of view would be more difficult to have a sense of understanding. And maybe I should give it up but anyway that was what I thought would happen. And I thought the other way of approach I think you get more of a sense of... I don't know what. You get more familiar, you feel more intimate. But this is the intimacy... I guess what I'm trying to do now is make intimacy with something else. Which is not the same kind it was before. And maybe after a while this will seem like the other way but in another dimension or something. We'll see. Any fans this morning? So I guess I'm just recommending that we just take this babbling into your Zazen and see what happens.

[75:50]

Thank you very much. Om Namo Tushita Om Namo Tushita Namo Tushita Namo Tushita

[77:06]

Namo Tushita [...]

[77:15]

@Text_v004
@Score_JJ