March 14th, 2009, Serial No. 03640
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Please bear with me if I say something that sounds kind of grand. The Buddha way is love for all beings. The Buddha way is compassion for all beings. I guess that although it's kind of a grand statement, I guess that that's not a big shock to you. If it is, please let me know. But I propose that as an idea, that that's what the Buddha way, the way of the Buddhas is. Another way I've been saying it lately is that the Buddha way is helping others.
[01:09]
And then further, I would offer that the Buddha way is to love all beings without dwelling in them. To wholeheartedly care for all beings in such a way that there's no attachment to them. And I would like to turn that around and say that when we do love beings wholeheartedly, we are not attached to them.
[02:31]
Now you may think that there's some beings you're not attached to, but you don't feel like you love them with your whole heart. But I propose that if we love someone with our whole heart, we're not attached to them. You can love someone a great deal and still be somewhat attached, but if you exercise the love more and more fully to the end, there will not be attachment in the Buddha way. And this is what makes it possible to love all beings. To love all beings without dwelling in them is to love all beings with perfect wisdom.
[03:53]
And I say perfect wisdom, but you could also say the perfection of wisdom, but maybe better to say to love all beings with perfecting wisdom, an ongoing perfecting of wisdom by loving each and every being without dwelling in them. And I think I might get back to this, but I should also say this kind of love of all beings, which is in accord with perfect wisdom and which does not create attachment, is to love beings with no resistance to the beings or to the love.
[05:02]
And I'll amplify on this resistance later, I hope. So, I'm suggesting that the love which is the Buddha's way, the love which is the Buddha way of loving all beings, that that love includes not abiding in any of the beings that we love. And since we love all beings, it means that this love requires not abiding in anything. So the mind of the bodhisattva, the being in the evolutionary process of helping others completely, that being has a mind of no abode, and that mind of no abode, that mind of perfect wisdom, requires love of all beings.
[06:16]
Perfect wisdom requires love of all beings. And vice versa. Love of all beings requires perfect wisdom. This is a proposal of cause and effect. This year I promise to concentrate on the Buddha's teaching, the Buddha's teachings of causation. Love for all beings is the cause of perfect wisdom. Perfect wisdom is the cause of the love of all beings. Perfect wisdom is no resistance to any and all beings. And no resistance to any and all beings is perfect wisdom.
[07:27]
In this case, these causes and effects are part of one thing. They are causes and effect. They depend on each other. They mutually cause each other. They arise through mutual dependence. And this arising is the arising of the Buddha way. Helping others arises with others helping us. So in echoing or resonating with a famous and wonderful expression by our ancestor Ehe Dogen, I would say that to love, now this is something new, watch, to love the Buddha way is to love the self.
[08:30]
To love the way of helping others is to love the self. And to love the self is to forget the self. To love the self into oblivion. I'm tempted to say to love the self to death, but That sounds like killing, so I just say, love the self into oblivion. And by loving the self into oblivion, the self is saved. By loving the self into oblivion, all events realize the self. everything that happens to the self, which has been loved into oblivion, are enlightening.
[09:36]
To love the self in the context of the Buddha way is to love all beings. So this is kind of a new definition of loving the self. This isn't, again, liking the self, and this isn't liking all beings. You can like them, it's fine. And you may dislike them, actually, that's welcome too. But what's being encouraged is loving them, which is neither like or dislike. And the love can be there when there's like and dislike, which, as you know, there is. I mean, there seems to be. But this love of the self, this thorough love of the self, is the same as loving all beings.
[10:48]
And that's the same as to forget all beings who are loved. But, I just said, the Buddha way is to forget all beings that are loved. The Buddha way is to love all beings and to forget all beings who are loved. In other words, don't dwell on them. I would suggest that we don't forget any beings before we love them. And now that, but don't forget them before you love them all the way. Remember them until you can love them without dwelling in them. I would suggest that to me and you. So it isn't like, okay, I loved him, I can move on to the next person. No.
[11:54]
I need to love him until I don't dwell in him. And you may think, well, I love him and I don't dwell in him. Well, I would say, just to make sure, love him more. Say, well, I loved him more, I still don't dwell in him. Okay, well, how about a little bit more? No, actually, I've got to move on to the next person now. Are you going to come back? Now, really, take a particular person or a particular being. A being could be like a rock, a tomato, your own fear. I love my own fear, but I'm not dwelling in it. Okay, love it some more. Are you really completely willing to spend your whole life devoted to your fear until you love it completely and have forgotten it and not abiding in it?
[13:00]
Yes? Okay, well go ahead and do that. And let us know when you feel like you've reached complete love without dwelling in your fear. or in your spouse, or in your children, or in your parents, or in your friends. Come back and tell us when you completely love one being with no attachment. And that you love your attachments completely with no attachments. Because you can say, in a sense, beings are a kind of attachment. So we're not trying to get rid of attachment, we're just trying to be with attachment in such a way that doesn't create attachment. This is called forgetting the Buddha way, forgetting the self, and forgetting the beings who we live for and die for.
[14:11]
So again, don't forget any beings that you're loving until the forgetting happens at the ultimate point of the love. And if you think you've reached that place, then it's good to find a Buddha and bring your Buddhahood to meet that Buddha. Check it out. One other way to say it, we have not fully loved a being until we have forgotten them. We have not fully loved a being until we can't find them anymore.
[15:19]
And not only can't find them, but know that nobody can find them. Then we're really in love. I have another page of notes on this line of talk, but I'm going to stop because I feel like now may be time to talk about resistance. Because after all, it is about 1039 or 1037. Is that right? So I probably should stop pretty soon. That's not resistance. Let us not resist. So, yeah, resist. So I haven't been talking to you in this way for a few days.
[16:22]
In the last few days I have not been talking to you like this. So, right? So you've not been listening to me talk like this for the last few days. So you may not have too much resistance to what I'm saying for the last few days. But if you had been, you probably would be resisting what I'm saying. or not so much what I'm saying, yeah, what sort of what I'm saying, and also what I'm talking about. But when I do talk to people this way, they do come to me and say, you know, I kind of resist what you're talking about. I resist. I must admit, I resist living for the sake of all beings. I resist it. Now, when somebody tells me that, I think that's an expression of loving his self, that he looks and sees that he's resisting and he comes and talks, he takes care of that resistance and comes and talks to me or somebody else about it.
[17:30]
It's actually quite kind to recognize it and to bring it to discuss in a kind of calm and loving environment. Let's look at this resistance, shall we? So, person is resisting this wonderful thing. How dare you? No. I'm resisting the Buddha way. According to you, I'm resisting living for the sake of all beings. And I have the courage to be honest and tell you I'm resisting what you say is the Buddha way. And the person says, what should I do about the resistance? And I say, what do I say? What should he do about the resistance? You already know, right? What? Love it. Yeah, love it. Welcome it. Live for the welfare of all beings. I feel resistance to that. Welcome the resistance. Not like it.
[18:33]
Not ask for it to come necessarily. You don't have to invite it unless you get special encouragement. But when it comes, welcome it. Be patient with it. Don't look down at it as less good than non-resistance. Don't look down on half-heartedness as not as good as wholeheartedness. You might say, well, it is not as good. Okay, fine. Don't look down at not as good as less good than better. Don't look down on anything. Don't look down on the worst thing that there is in your life. And don't, well, looking up to it might be okay. So bodhisattvas are not supposed to look down on others, like, you know, I'm better than them. But it is kind of okay to look up. Others are better than me. That's kind of okay. But again, if you're looking down on others, welcome it.
[19:37]
Love the fact that you think you're better than quite a few people. Love that, which means welcome it. Be patient with it. Be gentle with it. Be flexible with it. Flexible with what? My resistance to living for the sake of all beings and my resistance in the form of thinking I'm better than other people, my resistance in thinking people are Not good. My resistance in thinking this is not good and that's not good. My resistance to actually things that are good, like living for the welfare of all beings. Being patient with that and gentle with that. Flexible with that. Nonviolent with it. Nonviolent with resistance. Not overbearing like, get rid of the resistance. Now, if there is, get rid of the resistance.
[20:39]
Be gentle with that. There is apparently, according to the stories, a bunch of people in the history of the Buddhist tradition who said, get rid of the resistance. They did that to give students a chance to be gentle with them, to meet them courageously and flexibly and not be overbearing on the overbearing bodhisattva teachers. who aren't really being overbearing. They're just seeing if the students can not respond symmetrically. Oh, poor teacher, you must be kind of stressed. No, I was just testing to see if you could be kind to me when I'm being overbearing. and treating the resistance all these loving ways and in this way get to the point where you treat the resistance without dwelling in it.
[21:57]
So then the resistance to living for the welfare of all beings is the same as the resistance to living without dwelling in anything. And in this way of kindness you get to the place where you can actually be totally devoted to whatever, your own resistance, your own fear, other people's resistance, other people's fear, other people's violence, other people's greed, hatred, whatever. To meet that, with a welcoming, gracious heart, a patient heart, a gentle, flexible, non-violent, non-overbearing heart which doesn't create any attachment. And there's a wide variety of ways that resistance to the Buddha way manifests.
[23:06]
But three I thought I might mention. One is the one people usually mean by resistance, where you hold back. Like you hold back from... giving your life to the welfare of each and every being, each and every human being, each and every human being, to give your life fully to each being. Some people would hold back from that, right? Most of us can get in touch with a little bit of holding back to some human beings. Right? Some. Some you feel like, I don't think I'm holding back with them. Okay, we'll hold that one over there for a second, the one you don't think you're holding back. But some you do feel like you're holding back. So you can see that resistance. I don't want to give my life to this person. Okay, there's the resistance. I feel resistance to that. Okay, fine. We're with you. We will be with you As long as you resist giving yourself to this person, we'll hang in there with you through this long path of resistance, this long and ever-changing path of resistance to helping this person wholeheartedly.
[24:19]
And also it's great that you notice it and you can express it. A lot of people are resisting giving themselves to people or loving beings. They don't even notice that they're resisting. They're distracted from noticing that they're resisting this program called the Buddha way. But those who notice are really like doing really well, I would say, to notice, okay, what am I missing? I'm resisting the Buddha way. How wonderful that I'm resisting such a wonderful thing. I'm not resisting a petty thing, but actually, now that I think of it, I also resist petty things. I resist being petty. I don't like being petty. When I'm petty, I kind of like resist it. So actually, I push away being great, or I resist being great. I hold back from being really great and magnanimous, and I also hold back from being really petty and stingy and small and nasty.
[25:26]
So actually, if you're great beings who are great beings... who are living for the welfare of all beings, are not afraid of being petty. Because pettiness is one of the beings they're devoted to. When pettiness arises in themselves, they're patient and welcoming of it. They're kind to their own pettiness. And if they're afraid of their own pettiness, they're kind to their fear of being petty. And if they meet other beings who are dabbling or really heavily into pettiness, they welcome these, what do you call them, these pettiness aficionados. They welcome these beings. They welcome them. They say, please come in. We're here for you. What can we do to help you? Now you can make me feel better about being petty.
[26:33]
Okay. Well, I just want you to know that you have my full support to be petty. And you can be petty as long as you need to be. And I'm your supporter. I hope someday that you won't dwell on the pettiness after you really love it. But right now, if you're dwelling in it, I am totally supporting you. And I'm not dwelling... actually, in your dwelling in it, or getting you to get out of it. I might not say that to the person, but that's my vow, to learn that. So that's one kind of resistance which I guess is familiar to us, holding back, pushing away. Another kind of resistance is holding on. So there's like pushing away the life of living for the welfare of all and each completely, there's pushing that away or holding back from that.
[27:40]
And also when someone comes and tells me that they're resisting it, then I'm nice to them about their resistance to this great way of living. and they ask me what to do about it, and then they practice being kind to their own resistance, they often notice something else, in that the resistance is about fear. That if you, or if we, actually open to loving all beings, to living for all beings, we might feel like we'd have nothing to hold on to. So we're afraid of that. So you discover more about yourself as you notice your resistance and confess it. So the other kind of resistance is like when you first come to the Zen Center, when most of us first came. Some of you have been here a while. But when we first came, we didn't walk.
[28:44]
Most of us, I don't think, walked in the door and said, this is mine. I own the Zen Center. Some of us may have felt like, I'm home, but I don't own the house. I don't know, is that true? Did some of you come here and didn't immediately think you owned the place? But if you sweep the ground and wash the floors and clean the windows and straighten the cushions and cook the meals, and fix the tires, and pour gas into the cars, and maintain the cars, and be nice to the students, and love the students, and be devoted to the students, and be devoted to the garden, and fix the roof, and you do that for a decade, then you might think, well, actually, I do own the Zen Center. It is mine. which is, that's the normal human tendency.
[29:45]
It's my Zen center. So I'm looking at somebody who built some buildings here recently. And, you know, when he first started building them, he might not have thought, it's my building, but... Actually, I don't even think he thinks it now, but if you built a building at Zen center, he might think it's my building. And sometimes we talk that way, like, that's so-and-so's building because they built it. I have problems with the word my student. I try to avoid using my student. But the important thing is that I look in my heart and see, do I really think I own this person? Is it really mine? My children? My spouse? Do I think they're mine? So I watch and look at that. So that's another form of resistance, is to possess something, a being.
[30:49]
It's a resistance to them. And again, if you put more kindness towards them, it brings you more and more to the place of noticing where you are being possessive and then see if you can now find this way of being with them without owning them, without abiding in them. It's really quite a difficult place to get to. The prajnaparamita, the perfect wisdom, is called the profound perfect wisdom because profound means difficult. It's difficult to get to the place with something where you don't dwell in it. You have to love it really a lot. It's a big job. Love it. fully, not too much, not too little, in such a way as to not attach to it. That's a very profound practice, dash difficult. That's why we need to be patient with our resistance in the process, because it's going to be very challenging for us to find this place.
[31:58]
And again, be kind and patient with ourselves on how long it takes to fully love something without attaching to it. Many great beings in the past have said this is difficult, who have been trying to practice this way. Of course loving something a lot and being possessive of it or loving something a lot and loving something a lot and being possessive of it, it does have the feedback often of we do get pain for that. That's cause and effect too. And if you love fully but dwelling in what you love, I should say love almost fully and dwell in it, it's painful, sometimes very painful. So what some people do is think, maybe if I loved less, it will be less painful. So they try that, loving less.
[33:02]
And that does sometimes reduce the pain. So loving less with dwelling reduces the pain. Loving more with dwelling, in some sense, might turn the pain up. But how about loving more and drop the dwelling? I know this person who's had this problem with me for a long time that they really have been very kind to me and loving to me, and they have a big problem with me. And recently this person came and said, I still have this problem with you and I tried loving you less as a way to cope with the problem. And that does kind of help a little bit. It numbs the pain. But it occurred to me recently that the problem I have with you is I expect something of you. And I said, I didn't say it, but I kind of feel hallelujah. That's right. You've been expecting something. You've been expecting me to be a decent person or a reasonably kind person or something, or even a great loving teacher.
[34:14]
Whatever. Now, if some of you expect things of me, but don't give yourself to me, it won't be so painful. But if you are devoted to me, and you dwell in me, it will be painful. And for me, towards you too, so that the dwelling does give feedback, does cause feedback. Something's off here. What's the part that's off is the dwelling. But the non-dwelling doesn't just come from not paying attention and not caring for things. We just don't notice it. Yeah, we just don't notice that we're dwelling. And the other kind of dwelling... The only kind of resistance, which I'm quite familiar with, is forgetting. So I'm not going to just flat out say, I don't want to be devoted to all beings. And I'm not saying I want to possess and control them all. So I can just resist the project of being devoted and not attaching by forgetting.
[35:20]
Just forget. So Part of being wholehearted is to remember. When you remember, then you can notice you're resisting. When you resist, the nice thing about, when you forget, the nice thing is that you forget, you don't even notice that you're resisting because you forgot what it is that you want to do that you're resisting. So if you notice these kinds of resistance, if you wish to practice the Buddha way, and if you agree with me that it is simply, very simply, being devoted to all beings, living for the sake of all beings, making every action of body, speech, and mind for the sake of all beings, if you agree with me, then you may notice some resistance, and then let's help each other deal with the resistance in this loving way. Because resistance is a wonderful being to love. It's a wonderful, actually, like a bodhisattva.
[36:22]
It's a bodhisattva that comes to us and says, can you love this resistance? Pettiness is a gift for us to take care of wholeheartedly, lovingly, without attaching to it. And greatness is also a gift, of course, which comes to us to see if we can love it without attaching to it. So now it's probably, you know, what time is it? Oh.
[37:22]
bodhisattva's vow, they promise to live for the sake of all beings. And then when they practice that vow, they notice resistance to it. And then they bring that resistance forward, confess it, and see how they feel about it, and then act again and see if the next action can be wholeheartedly for the welfare of all beings without dwelling in it. And again. And that they notice holding back and so on. And there's no end to this practice. This is the ongoing maintenance of the Buddha way and there's no end of it until everybody is living for the welfare of everybody.
[38:45]
And so it's going to be a long time before everybody's living for the welfare of everybody. And some of our favorite people don't seem to even be ready to consider living for the welfare of everybody. Like my grandsons. One of my grandsons is still not willing to live for the welfare of George Bush. He's still harping on George Bush's administration. And, you know, I don't exactly tell him, you should love George Bush with your whole heart. But I sort of do tell him that. But not to get him to do it. And actually I don't tell him that. But I do have some response when he doesn't want to live for the welfare of past presidents, some past presidents.
[39:51]
But I, you know, so my job with him is this person who's resisting this bodhisattva practice, who has resistance to it, he doesn't yet think he owns the bodhisattva practice. He thinks he owns me, but he doesn't think he owns the bodhisattva practice. He more like has resistance to it in the form of holding back from caring for all beings. So my job with him is easy to love him in his resistance, in his pettiness, in his small-mindedness. Easy to love him, easy to be patient with him most of the time, easy to be generous with him, easy to be gentle with him. The hard part with him is not abiding in him. That's really hard. And so, because all the love comes so easily, it's hard to find a place when it's like total, where there's no attachment to him, no dwelling in him.
[41:02]
So there's a lot, and it comes easily, but it's a little off. It's a little incomplete, because I still kind of like You know, there's this fleeting dwelling here and there. And I really enjoy catching myself at it. And he enjoys catching me at it too. So I told you the story about one time I was behaving in a way he didn't like and he turned to me and said after he recovered from his hatred towards me he said, if a Buddhist master saw the way you're acting they would fire you. But then after a while he forgave me and his little hand reached up for mine and we were walking together again down the path.
[42:15]
And now, just recently, just a short time ago, he's starting to ask me questions about our wonderful teacher, Suzuki Roshi. He's starting to ask me about how he was and who his students were and who was and wasn't his students. He's starting to show interest in our dear teacher and his teaching and his students. And of course, it's easy for me to love that and welcome that. But it's hard not to dwell in it. Oh, so lovely. Little guy. Little guy getting interested in Zen. Oh, how cute. Very difficult for me not to dwell on that. You can imagine, right? So how do I receive it? You know, gratefully and let it go. Thank you and give it away.
[43:19]
And not just for me to protect me from dwelling and the pain of the dwelling, but for the grandfather to show the grandson how to accept such a precious gift and not hold on to it and give it back to the universe. It's very difficult. I really enjoy this challenge. And I hope you all have some people who you really can love and love so much that you can find the place of dwelling and be kind to the dwelling and then you're really getting to the heart of the bodhisattva practice. You're getting close to perfect wisdom and your love supports you to get close to perfect wisdom and your perfect wisdom that's coming close is helping you perfect your love. Thank you very much for listening to this.
[44:30]
May our intentions equally extend to every being at place with
[44:42]
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