So I would like to talk a little bit more about this thing called the self-fulfillment Samadhi. Now all Buddha's and all ancestors who uphold the Buddha Dharma have made it the true path of enlightenment to sit upright practicing in the midst of self-fulfilling Samadhi. Those who have attained awakening in India and China follow this way.

[01:05]

It was done so because teachers and disciples personally transmitted this excellent method as the essence of the teaching. Now this goes on, as you know, to say some more things like, in the authentic tradition of our teaching it is said that this directly transmitted, straightforward Buddha Dharma is the unsurpassable of the unsurpassable. You should just wholeheartedly sit and thus drop away body and mind. It strikes me this morning that the reason that it's the unsurpassable of the unsurpassable is that it's so simple, this practice, this method.

[02:22]

So simple, so innocent, so naive is the approach. I had a dream that was something like this, there was either an assassination or an assassination attempt of some leader, a president or an abbot or something like that. And then sort of to figure out how it happened or to prevent it from happening again or to catch the murderer, I can't remember exactly which, they decided to stage the murder over again and it was staged like on a movie set, like a western movie set.

[03:39]

So it was staged like in a saloon, a corner saloon, western saloon. And they had the cameras all set up, they're going to film it too I think, so they had the cameras all set up. So let's just say this is the corner right here coming to where I am and there's steps going up to the saloon like this and all these people are in the saloon like you are. And I think the person, and then for some reason or other the person that was playing the part of the person who's going to be assassinated was me. And so I was getting ready to walk up the steps and so they had the pretend murderer, the actor murderer was inside the saloon someplace and the saloon was all lit up with bright lights and so on.

[04:41]

And then up on the balcony above the steps, going up there, was actually the real murderer. I don't know if it was a real murderer, I don't know if it was the real murderer, but it was somebody who was actually going to shoot me. Who was going to actually do the murder in this reenactment of the murder, was going to do a murder. And this guy, he's a guy in his, I would say, late 30's or 40's. He looked kind of like a cross between Donald and Steve Miloski, but darker hair. And so this guy was up on the balcony, he was coming up out of the dark on the balcony and he came over to the edge to get ready to shoot me. And then the camera came in on his face.

[05:47]

And it's sort of like they do in the movies, it came in on his face and then it sort of went into his mind. To see what the reason for this guy wanting to shoot me was. And we went into his mind and we saw that the reason why he was going to shoot me, that he saw this too, that the reason why he was going to shoot me was because he was being driven by a criminal. In other words, he had the idea in his mind of some criminal that he saw that was driving him to shoot me. And he was really angry that this criminal was driving him to murder someone. And he woke up from the absurdity of being driven by a criminal. He got angry at the idea that his life was being driven by a criminal.

[06:58]

And he was being driven by a criminal to do criminal things. And he got angry at that and did not actually commit the crime. He decided not to have his life being driven by criminals. What? He saw, he had it in his mind, we went into his mind, and in his mind there was a criminal, I guess maybe the person he was going to shoot, whoever he thought I was playing, that person he saw as a criminal, that's why he was going to shoot this person. But then he realized that actually what was going on was that he was a slave of the criminals. And his life was under the dictatorship of criminals. And he got angry at that, and rather than trying to kill the criminal, he didn't. Because if he killed the criminal, the criminal would be boss.

[08:02]

The criminal would be puppeteering him. And he got angry at that and didn't do it, and woke up. Does that make sense? It really does, as you shall see. So, self-fulfillment samadhi. We, people, go around at various speeds, at various velocities, we move around in this world, driven by what we think is happening. We have various abstract concepts about what's going on, like,

[09:06]

this is a criminal, or this is a good person, this is my lover, this is my enemy. And based on these abstract ideas, we actually then do things. We are driven to do things by what we think is happening. So, to make a long story short, how can we... What is the way, in a situation like that, to sort of come down and start living your real life? And so the self-fulfillment samadhi is to look at the world and

[10:08]

realize that no matter where you look, what you see is nothing but yourself. This will bring you down from the life of believing in your abstract concepts. This will make you innocent and unhurt by your concepts. of what's happening. All these concepts, all these criminals, all these demons, all these saints, all these Buddhists, all these males and females, as not males and females are they taught by the Dutagata, therefore we say males and females.

[11:17]

What are these males and females dancing before my eyes? They are myself and nothing but myself. I look out now at you people. I see you with my eyes and you are reflected in my eyes, your faces are reflected in my eyes. You exist because I see you in my eyes and what I see is nothing but myself. And each of you are also living out your life that is only yourself.

[12:45]

This is not an objective truth that I'm telling you. This is called the self-fulfilling Samadhi. To sit upright with the awareness that all you're seeing is nothing but yourself. In other words, you are you and you are not you. All these people are nothing but yourself. This is called learning the backward step that turns the light around and illuminates the self. But it isn't that you turn away from the world

[13:52]

and look back at some self which is over here, separate from the world. You illuminate the self by realizing that everybody else is yourself. That's illuminating the self. And that is the backward step because it is the reverse of the way we usually think. Usually we think I'm here and you're over there. No. I am not me. What I am is the world and the world is nothing but myself. We are separated by an eternity and we are never separated for an instant.

[15:07]

We face each other every moment of the day and we do not face each other even for an instant. It is through self-identity that the Buddha attains the utmost right and perfect enlightenment. And self-identity as a lack of self. . How is the self fundamentally religious?

[16:12]

How is it that the deeper we reflect on the ground of the self, the more self-aware we become, the more we feel the need of religious practice arise from the depths of our being and our struggle intensifies? It is because we are completely contradictory existence. Our existence is completely contradictory. Because this completely contradictory self-identity is our total reason for existence.

[17:18]

Everything is fleeting, changing, transient, impermanent. All living beings die and therein no life exists without death. There is no death without selfhood and no selfhood without death. So to study the self means to forget the self and to forget the self means the self,

[18:41]

to forget the self that is in opposition to the other. Forget that one. And be aware of the one that is nothing but the world. Or remember the world that is nothing but the self. To sit upright being aware that this world is nothing but yourself is the self-fulfilling awareness. Living out our life that is nothing but our self,

[19:44]

living out our self, our life is our self, living out our self that is nothing but our self, without losing sight of this self which receives the self and uses the self. This is the wondrous method that all Buddhists have used. All sentient beings, excuse me, all human beings receive and use the self. That's all they ever do. This method of the Buddha is to sit upright in the middle of that process. The difference is, it's not just Jiu-Jiu-Yu, it's Jiu-Jiu-Yu Samadhi.

[20:45]

It's not just receiving and using the self. It's the awareness of receiving and using the self that is their method. So, sitting upright is a way, it sets up the awareness, which is then applied to the concrete, simple situation that what you see is just yourself. It's very simple because you don't have to do anything other than what you're already doing. All you have to do is sit still and watch the show. At this time, dullness and distraction are struck aside.

[22:02]

A couple of days ago I was about to tie a knot, a brocade knot, on top of one of my robes. One of the types of robes I have has a brocade knot on it. And I learned a way of tying this brocade, which I teach to the Jishas. And they enjoy trying to learn how to do this knot. I would be also willing to teach it to non-Jishas, if they wish. Andes even sometimes try to learn it. So, I came back and my Jisha wasn't around for some reason, so I was going to tie the knot. And I looked at the knot and I thought, well, I can tie this knot, but I'm just going to put this robe on in a few minutes. I just took it off for a break and I thought, well, it takes a pretty long time to tie this knot.

[23:13]

It's a lovely knot, but it takes quite a while to tie it. And I thought, well, maybe I won't tie it because, you know, I'm just going to put it on again in a minute. And, you know, I felt kind of lousy about that. And then my mind flashed to another situation that's similar to that. I wear an obi. I have a long obi. And every time I take the obi off, I've got this long piece of cloth, and guess what I have to do with it? Well, I have to deal with it. I could just throw it on the floor in a big pile, but usually I roll it up in some way or another. And sometimes when I'm rolling the obi up, my mind thinks, this is taking a long time. And then my mind thinks,

[24:16]

and I do this a lot. And then my mind thinks, if this takes a long time and I do it a lot, that means I'm spending my life rolling up obis. Rolling up obis and tying brocade knots. How much of my life am I spending doing this stuff? When I could be dancing or skiing. But I feel bad about that because I think, well, what, you know, do you think, would you rather be in the zendo doing this really cool thing called sitting upright rather than rolling up obis or tying knots that just get unrolled and untied in a few minutes? Would you rather do something eternal and extremely dignified, like sitting like a Buddha? They don't talk about Buddhas rolling obis up and tying brocade knots. I thought, wait a minute, what am I going to do?

[25:22]

I'm stuck and I have to do this stuff. Am I going to be wasting a big chunk of my life rolling this stuff up? What's the way out of wasting my life? I also spend a lot of time folding up paper sacks from the grocery store and so on. You know, they come back from the grocery store and they're sometimes crumpled. And you can take those crumpled things and you can crumble them some more and throw them away, right? But, you know, we're trying to save paper. So you can actually use these things over and over. If you fold them up again, nicely, making the seam again and then pressing them and then putting them in a pile, you can use them over and over maybe, I don't know, three, four, five or more times.

[26:26]

And each time you fold them, it's an opportunity to practice mindfulness. But see, this is like, what do you call it, this is optional good works that I take on. So I feel pretty good about that. Matter of fact, I feel even that I'm superior to the people who crumple them and throw them away. But when it comes to folding up my OB, I really don't have somebody to compare myself to, to feel better superior to. It's just me all by myself, alone in my closet, wasting my time. I can't really feel superior to someone and more holy. What's the way out? What? Velcro. Velcro. I thought you said dog food. I wear Velcro. What? What? What's an OB?

[27:27]

Come over and see me sometime. And I'll show you. Or do you want to hear about it? What? Forget this self, you know, this self that you usually think about, this one over here, that's separate from the rest of the world. Forget about it. And learn the self that is realized by everything. By being aware that all there is, that there's nothing but the self,

[28:31]

receiving the self and using the self. This is not an objective fact, because everybody else is doing the same thing. This is not the life that we all share together. This is a life which is nothing but our self. The life we actually share is what we realize when we are free of the life which we usually live out, which is the self. Which is just nothing but the self, receiving the self. I may say to you, you know,

[29:37]

that there is a life beyond the self. There is a life bigger than the self. Namely that I know that there's other selves who also are living their life which is nothing but their self. However, I live in a little world which is nothing but my self. And I will be released from this little world that I live in, which is called the world. I will be released from the world if I can accept, if I can be aware that my world that I live in is nothing but receiving my self and using my self. I will then be released from the world which is nothing but the self. And in that way I forget about the self which is something other than the world.

[30:39]

I forget about the world which is something other than the self. And then the world confirms my self. And when the world confirms my self I drop body and mind. Now some people confirm my self in a way I call, oh how sweet, I love it. Some people confirm my self, oh I hate it, it's repulsive, get it out of here, out of my face world. This is nothing but my self. This person I want to get rid of is nothing but my self. This person I want to hold on to is nothing but my self. I really do want to hold on to this person and they're nothing but my self. I really want to control this person and they're nothing but my self. I really want to get rid of this person

[31:41]

and they're nothing but my self. They're not that person. They are nothing but my self to me. What they really are, who knows. They think various things about it, other people think various things about them. But what the other people think about this person is nothing but themselves. And what the person thinks about herself is nothing but herself. Where do Buddhas meet? How do they meet? They meet strangely by each of them realizing that the other is nothing but themselves.

[32:42]

They meet face to face when they realize that the other one's face is nothing but their own face, is nothing but their self. This is how we meet. This is the GGU samadhi. This is the self-fulfillment samadhi. It's very simple, very radical. It is the reverse. There is no one to blame. There's no good out there. There's no Buddha out there. There's no evil out there. There is only the delusion that this self is separate

[33:45]

from the world. As soon as there is awareness in a human being, there is the affliction of what is called self-view and the affliction of self-ignorance and the affliction of self-pride and the affliction of self-love. Four afflictions arise as soon as there is awareness of the world. Self-fulfillment samadhi is to honestly accept that you are afflicted by self-view. To admit, to be aware that you are afflicted by self-view. In other words, that you view everything as the self. It's an affliction, but Buddhas are aware of that affliction.

[34:46]

They sit with awareness of the affliction of self-view. They sit with awareness of the affliction of self-ignorance. Self-ignorance means we ignore what the self is. We do not understand what the self is. They sit with awareness of that because what we think the self is is something separate from the rest of the world. And they reverse that ignorance by telling themselves repeatedly that what I think the self is is not correct. I think the self is this as opposed to the other. The other is the self. And there is self-love and self-pride too. Now I listen to my dream.

[36:00]

Am I really angry that I'm being driven by a criminal? The criminal that's driving me is that thing out there that I don't understand. What I don't understand is myself. And you can call that criminal Buddha or whatever. But whatever that is out there and this self are really one thing. And that's Dharma.

[37:01]

The fact that the world and the self are one is Dharma which the Buddhas uphold. And they uphold it by sitting upright in the awareness that this world is nothing but the self. And they live out the self which is nothing more than the self. Excuse me, Pam, but I wanted to get that out of my body. I have a question. There are a couple of ways or levels that we wake up and try to understand what it means that everything else is nothing but the self. And one of them is just

[38:03]

due to the physical and physiological reality of our bodies when I look at you with your image and anybody's image and reflecting upon it I have no matter who sits there and holds it in my brain to interpret it as you. And anything that you say is already interpreted and I'm also invited to think of that as an experience in my life. So in that sense you are me. I'm not, I don't actually I can't actually experience you as you and I can't be anything other than myself because I'm out of the term. There are other levels too that seems to me which I think experience other people like myself. And that is when I'm angry at somebody else for doing something and if I look back at why I'm angry

[39:06]

I can see something that I did that they're reacting to. Is that also a way that you can sit that would be more in the other person's face now? Yes, however it's a more complicated way. It's a more sophisticated way which is okay and it's okay. It's like that thing about that example that I used about hearing on the radio on a revival station or on a fundamentalist Christian station about talking about whether Jesus would wear a Rolex on his TV show if he were alive today. Did you ever hear about that? When I was driving out here one time I turned the radio on and got at a revivalist station and they said would Jesus wear a Rolex on his TV evangelist show? That was the refrain. And I think that the feeling of the song was that no, he wouldn't because he's into poverty, right?

[40:07]

So in other words the singer or the author of this song the composer their theory was that in the modern times Jesus' poverty practice would mean that he wouldn't wear Rolexes. They did not specify what type of watch he would wear or whether he would wear a watch at all or just have his Jisha carry a watch. Now would Jesus' Jisha wear a Rolex? We don't know. Anyway the point is that this would be rather sophisticated to try to figure that out and we could figure it out probably but what I recommend is first of all become Jesus and then see what kind of watch you wear. Alright? So your reasoning is perfectly good and I think I agree with it however I would recommend actually that you don't spend your time getting quite that complicated unless you're talking to somebody who needs you to be that complicated. I mean the second example

[41:12]

that you gave. The actual practice that opens the gates which will answer those questions for you and will take care of those kinds of situations and unfold that kind of skillful means to handle those problems comes from a simpler version a simpler understanding which is simply that everything is nothing but you. And all these other examples will be able to be handled from that awakening from that opening. So you gave an example but that example is not the opening awareness it's not the fundamental thing. The fundamental thing is just simply your life is nothing. The life you live is nothing but simply yourself receiving and using yourself. That is the ground of your life. That is the ground of your existence is the self

[42:14]

which is absolutely completely contradictory. Namely it's the world. It's not what you think it is. It is the world. And it is the world in all the easy to accept and difficult to accept manifestations. And you also demonstrated that on a physiological level it is the world on that level too it actually now is science is showing that it's the same there too. Everything follows the same pattern. It's just a question of whether it's been understood yet or not. But this is what the Buddhas this is what they have understood. Michael?

[43:19]

As part of practicing this course do you think it's more helpful to tell yourself that everything is yourself or or maybe in addition to invest in I think that's both of those things are necessary or I think that if you don't think it's true in other words if you really think that other people are not you if that's what you think then I think it would be good if you admit that because that thought is now what you're talking about. And that thought is you. But you have to admit that thought. I have to admit there's Michael before I can realize that that's nothing but me. Also the thought

[44:23]

that I don't believe this teaching is something that I have to recognize for what it is. The main thing to confess is that you really have a sense you really believe in separation. That you think that's true. And you think all these abstract things that you're seeing when I think you're you not me, that's an abstraction. When I realize you're me it's not abstract anymore. That is not abstract. Me actually is concrete because me is what dies. Me is what I'm worried about wasting time folding hobbies in closets. But the way to not waste time

[45:23]

is to remember that hobbies are nothing but me. And that really what I'm doing is I'm rolling up me. And folding me and tying a knot of me. And I'm never doing anything else but that. And this is the way you realize eternity. And this is the way you meet Buddhas who are doing exactly the same thing. And in fact this is what you're doing all the time anyway. It's just a question of sitting upright and being aware of it. It seems that this kind of me

[46:23]

you're talking about So what I think you said, yeah, I think that's completely consistent with what I'm saying. The self is not anything. The self is not anything. The self is not anything because the self is absolutely self-contradictory. Therefore it can't be anything. The self completely embraces its total negation. What could there be that embraces its total negation? What could be that way? It's called life. And you cannot grasp it. There's no such thing. Because as soon as you reach for it you get its negation. You cannot grasp it. There's no such thing as life. There's no such thing as death. And life entails death

[47:25]

and that's a contradiction too. Self, awareness and total oblivion. That's what life is. You can't get a hold of those. If you get a hold of one without the other that's simple delusion. So there's no such thing that you can grasp as self. Because self absolutely entails its complete negation. And its negation is not something you have to work hard to find. It is everything you seek. And its negation is its affirmation. The negation of the small self that you can get a hold of is the affirmation of the real self which is the only thing

[48:28]

the only way, the only opportunity for perfect enlightenment is this self. It is this self identity through which the Buddha is awakened. And that self identity is through the absence of self. This is the intense contradictory dialectical, dynamic radiance where life awakens to itself. We sit upright, busy with our body. If we do that we have a chance to be aware of this intense process of change of impermanence which exactly implies this real self which is self contradictory and identical with itself. It is here

[49:29]

that we are able to be together for an eternity never separated and always separated. We are together hand in hand forever in an indestructible love relationship and we are constantly being separated and snarling at each other. Or grabbing for each other depending on how the dials turn. But no matter whether we are trying to avoid or attach to each other we are always together. We can never get away from each other because all we know about each other is that we are our self. You are me. That is all I know about you. I can't get away from you because you are me. And I can't get you

[50:31]

because you are me either. Is it perhaps a bit much to go that's me rather than just not say anything. Yeah, I think it's a bit much. I think just touching would be sufficient. But if you say that's me then you probably should also say beforehand can I touch you to verify that you are me. Will you explode in my face if I touch you? If I suddenly am intimate with you? Will people talk? Are you

[51:32]

open to the scandal that might ensue if I should check out now whether you are really me by touching you? Everything you do actually to verify this is a bit much. It's very simple. It's simpler than that. You do not have to do anything to verify it. However, once it's verified then everything you do comes from that and it's totally wonderful. But once you realize that everybody that you see is just you then you realize that you should be very polite to people because they are not you. And so it's appropriate to be very sweet

[52:32]

and hesitant as you approach yourself because you are separated from yourself every moment. So, excuse me, but could I touch you just to express that I've discovered who I am? It's you! And you keep being me in unpredictable ways. I am actually amazing. I can't be grasped. You show me this. Oh, how you show me. Oh, how you show me. And even saying this to your closest friend we should be very polite. This is intense work.

[53:34]

It's an interesting practice to do that with yourself. Touch yourself as though you are touching someone else. This is OK. You can warm up like that in the morning. But the real thing I was going to say is you made me think of this again of this man-hearty, not having no head because it actually sort of works for me which, you know, his exercise is to see that everything that you see is where you thought your head was. And you can't see that. You can look down and see your feet and your legs and come up to your body, but when you get to the thing that's doing the seeing it's everything else. When you get to the thing that's doing the seeing, it's everything else. That's all there is. All there is is everything else. And everything else is just you. The hard part

[54:37]

is to sit upright and be aware of this which also involves total self-negation. But we got this down so it's possible to practice. It's possible to settle into. It's possible to settle into folding ovies for the rest of your life. There's no end to this

[55:49]

so I might as well stop. Thank you. Chanting

[56:55]

Chanting Chanting

[57:09]

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