And during our opening chant, I felt our chanting way up in the air above the Zendo, but I wasn't sure if that was our chanting or an airplane, I still don't know, but I could feel the chanting went way up above the building, it was going overhead, and then when you stopped, I thought I heard the airplane, but I wasn't sure, do you know? Was it an airplane? Anyway, it was, we were in harmony with the airplane. I wanted to say something about, something that, a little problem occurred in the class around alaya, and that is about alaya being a resultant, and what does that mean? And now I would propose to you to think about it like this, the Sanskrit word that they

[01:11]

use there is ipaka, which is translated as resultant, but this alaya which is a resultant is an alaya which is one of three transformations, and all these three transformations, alaya, manas, and the acquisition manas and manavijnanadattu are the resultant thinker, the reflector and the acquisition of the sixfold object, those three are all working together. So, the way I'm understanding Vasubandhu now is when he says it's a resultant, what he means, his primary intention here is to say that alaya is causally produced, that

[02:11]

it's codependently arises, that he's telling you right off that it's codependently arises. First thing he tells you about alaya is that it's codependently produced, and alaya is also a seed for things, and alaya is also a result of past, it's a result of other things and it's a result of the past, and it's also a cause for the future, but there's no past, present and future separate here. So alaya is not a substantial thing, that the meaning of resultant there I think is that it's dependently arisen, it's the first thing Vasubandhu wants to tell you about it, so you don't think alaya is like this place or this substantial stuff that everything comes up out of. It is a ground in a sense, but it's a codependently produced ground, it's an ungraspable ground

[03:17]

and it's always working with these other two transformations, and it has the power to be like a seed, but the thing is when people think of it as a seed then they think of it as this core, this thing, which can produce, which can be the resource for images, which is true it is, but it's not a substantial thing, it's a codependently produced thing. And it's also a result of everything else, including the past, but also it's a result in the present of these other two transformations. It's a result in the present, not a result of something before it, but also it's a result of things before it, but so are they, so are the other transformations. So I think the main point anyway that he wants us to know right from the beginning is this alaya is a dependently arisen phenomena, it has no inherent existence in itself, and it

[04:21]

always works with these other two simultaneously. So then could you explain a bit at this point the difference between the ungraspable alaya and the foundation of consciousness, the foundation of consciousness? I'll do that in class. I think I just wanted to sort of clear that point up because that was sort of, I think, a kind of a bug at the end of the last class, and this other one I think, it is the character we're working on, so we'll definitely work on it from the beginning of the class, okay? And last time we talked about the bodhisattva practice of confession and repentance, and I was studying the Platform Sutra of the Sixth Ancestor, Huy Nhung, and he has a section

[05:35]

in there on repentance, and I took some notes on that, but I can't find them here. But basically, one of the points he makes that I want to say is that he says it's useless or meaningless to repent in front of the Buddha. When I read that, I thought of a conversation that we had. Muga was saying, well, does it feel good to do it by yourself? Is that okay, or is it good to do it in front of the Buddha or in front of somebody? And I think it's better to do it in front of somebody, in a way. And then the Sixth Ancestor said, it's meaningless to do it in front of the Buddhas. I think what he means, if you read that, I want to tell you in advance, what I think he means is two things. One is what he means is that to merely say in front of Buddha, I'm sorry, I'm really

[06:37]

sorry, I really regret doing this, that that is meaningless unless you also actually cut off doing the thing in the future. He's saying that just for people to come and confess, which is probably a prevalent practice in China in his time, in front of the Buddhas or in front of the teachers, is meaningless unless you actually have the resolution to definitely not do it in the future. So that's one way I think he means, that it's silly to just be confessing in front of the Buddha. Another meaning, of course, is that the Buddha is not in front of you. So although you confess in front of a Buddha, the Buddha is not a Buddha out there. So that's meaningless too. And I think I've also mentioned to you before about the statement from the dual mirror samadhi,

[07:52]

the meaning is not in the words, yet it responds to the inquiring impulse. And literally that means it responds to the arrival of energy. It, what is it? In this case. The teaching of Bhasmas. The arrival of energy, energy comes. What energy? Your energy, the energy of your life. You put your energy out there. Here's my energy. And there's a response. They also say inquiry and response come up together. It's like. Right, so this, this is inquiry. The response happens at the same time. It isn't like, hello, it's. The response is right there. That's the response.

[08:54]

You see? So in that way, when your energy comes, there is a response simultaneous with that. And what is that response? It is the teaching of Bhasmas. What is the teaching of Bhasmas? It's the Bhasmas, whatever that is. That's the response. But if you don't go like this. There's no response. If you don't say, oh, there's no response. When I go, I go, oh, but what's the response? It's right there, too. That's the response. I didn't make that. Oh, I went, I did something. And then there was an owl. But the owl was, what was the owl? It's the teaching of Bhasmas. So we do confess. And we also should confess, as this ancestor says. There is a confession, and then there's the repentance, and then there's a resolution.

[09:59]

Repentance resolution. So the term that they use in the Platform Sutra is Chan Hui. And he says, what does Chan mean? Chan means that you confess, that you avow what you did. What does Hui mean? Hui means that you say you're not going to do it anymore. So confession, or repentance, and resolution. Those two is what you mean by repentance. And, again, there's no counting about saying, well, I don't know if I'm going to do it, and I don't know if I'm going to be able to not do it anymore. Well, forget that. Nobody, that's, you don't need to talk about that. You just say you're not going to do it anymore, if you're ready to say that. Just say it. And before you're done saying it, you'll be done saying it. Later, you may say, well, I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. I just said it. Well, then you, you're not going to be able to do it anymore. Yeah, so what? That's a different matter. That's doubt.

[11:00]

But already you committed yourself, and that's part of the process. That is the process. The doubt thing is a different thing. Several years ago, Akinrushi gave a talk, and I think, I don't remember what he said, but he was talking about this French, I guess she's a political writer, and maybe some other writings, too. She did. Her name was Simone Weil. Right? Did you say her name? Was she a political writer? She was a mystical, mostly mystical, but she was involved in the system of Marxism. Yeah. Yeah. So Simone Weil, somewhere along the line, somebody told her about that she should pick some kind of koan or something, and that she should memorize it, and then meditate on it.

[12:10]

And the poem she chose was an English poem by a guy named, I'm from Mississippi, by a guy named Herbert, George Herbert. George Herbert was a priest in the newly formed English church that the Henry VIII started so that he could have lots of wives. George Herbert wrote this poem. He wrote three poems called Love. And I don't know which one she memorized, actually, but I think it's poem Love No. 3. I think. I hope so. Anyway, if not, I still like this poem. It's called Poem Roman No. 3 by George Herbert. When I was a kid, a friend of mine and I found these poems which were called metaphysical poems.

[13:18]

They're written by George Herbert and people like George Herbert and Francis Vaughan, not Francis Vaughan, what's his name, Henry Vaughan, and these other metaphysical poets. But the thing about these metaphysical poets is since they were writing about metaphysics, they could write these poems which were apparently kind of sexy. Because this is just metaphysics, right? Then you can say anything, right? You can talk about, you know, going up into Jesus's whatever, you know, and, or, you know, Mary's whatever and doing this and that with Mary. It was perfectly all right because this is obviously metaphysical. So you didn't have to hold back. You could really get into all kinds of fleshy comments. This is a poem which is obviously about spiritual matters, and, but it's really got, you know, some flesh in it. Love, bad me welcome.

[14:20]

This is about confession and repentance, okay, I feel. It's about this dynamic between the arrival of energy and the feelings of guilt and the teaching of dustness. That's my feeling about this. I like this poem, so I memorized it, but I'm not going to do my memory so much today. Love, bad me welcome. Yet my soul drew back guilty with dust and sin. But quick eyed love observing me grow slack from my first entrance in. Sweetly question, sweetly questioning. No, drew near to me, drew nearer to me, sweetly questioning if I lacked anything.

[15:27]

A guest, I said, worthy to be here. Love said, thou shalt be he. I, the unkind, the ungrateful. Ah, my dear, I cannot look on thee. Who made these eyes? But I said, love. Truth, Lord, but I have marred them. Let my shame go where it doth deserve. And no, you're not, says love, who bore the blame.

[16:43]

Ah, my dear, you must sit down, says love, and eat my meat. So I did sit and eat. And I will serve, ah, my dear. So she memorized this poem, and this was a poem she meditated on and supposedly had her great enlightenment experience. Love, bad me welcome, yet my soul drew back guilty with dust and sin. But quick eyed love observing me grow slack from my first entrance in. Drew nearer to me, sweetly questioning if I lacked anything. A guest, I answered, worthy to be here.

[17:52]

Love said, thou shalt be he. I, the unkind, the ungrateful. Ah, my dear, I cannot look on thee. Who made these eyes? But I. Love did reply, truth, Lord, but I have marred them. Let my shame go where it doth deserve. And no, you're not, says love, who bore the blame. My dear, then I will serve. You must sit down, says love, and taste my meat. So I did sit and eat. So I proposed to you that this is a story about what you have to go through in order to sit still. And that you're sitting still is not because you can sit still, but is because of love.

[18:59]

And love forgives you, because love gives you your eyes in the first place. So even though you've marred them with your various behaviors, love gave you the eyes in the first place, and love forgives you, because love bears the blame. But you have to recognize the problem. This person who drew away has confessed. Okay, so now next I come to the Bodhisattva practice of rejoicing in the merits of others. After you sit down and eat, after you feel forgiven, you will be able to, well, you will be able to really appreciate others. So Samantabhadra says to the children of Buddha, again, O noble-minded person, how should one

[20:14]

rejoice at the merits and virtues of others? To do so, one should think in the following way. In all the realm of Dharma and the realm of space in the ten directions, there are infinite Buddhas equal to the amount of infinite atoms throughout the Buddha domains, in past, present and future. From the very first moment when they, who are they? Infinite Buddhas. From the very first moment when these infinite Buddhas brought forth the thought of enlightenment and set their minds to attain all-knowing wisdom of the Buddha, they have diligently practiced all spiritual deeds, and they have been able to attain all-knowing wisdom of the Buddha through eons of kalpas equal to the amount of infinite atoms throughout all

[21:17]

Buddha domains. In each and every kalpa, they have sacrificed an infinitude of heads, eyes, hands, feet, in the fulfillment of the altruism of the Bodhisattva. They have performed all of these arduous acts, fulfilled all the requirements of different paramitas, realized the various stages of a Bodhisattva's wisdom, accomplished the sphere of enlightenment of Buddha, and eventually have entered into parinirvana with the acts of distributing the relics. In all these great acts of merit, I will emulate them and rejoice. Nay, I will rejoice in the merit or virtue of even though it be infinitesimal as a grain of dust that may be possessed by any being in any realm of the six worlds and four births

[22:24]

or any kind of existence in the ten directions throughout the universes. Again, all the śrāvakas are Jagat Buddhas and thoroughly learned ones and partly learned ones. With all such saints in the ten directions and three times, I rejoice at whatever merit they possess, the infinitely vast merits of Bodhisattvas, their self-sacrifice and their courage in carrying through the most difficult acts of bodhi, their determination and perseverance in pursuing the supreme enlightenment. In all these immense merits, I will rejoice. My rejoicing in these merits will cease when the realm of space is ended or the karma, sorrows and passionate desires of all beings are ended. But since these are endless, so will be my rejoicing endless, thought after thought without interruption in bodily, vocal and mental actions without becoming wearied or jaded.

[23:29]

I won't give up. I won't grow up. I won't wear a hat. I won't believe what they say. I'll keep trying. I'll do this impossible thing like a silly kid would. I won't give up. So rejoicing in the merits of others is rejoicing in the incredibly vast merit and virtue of Buddhas and Bodhisattvas, you know, who, you know, in the Avatamsaka Sutra I'm reading these long things about Bodhisattvas give their feet, their hands, their fingernails, their toes, their eyes, their ears, their nose, their tongue, their heads, their wives and children, their husbands. And they give the wives and children and husbands that they love. They give the stuff. And when the people come, when they see the people coming to get the stuff from them, to

[24:36]

get their eyes, they see the people coming to ask for their skin, they're overjoyed. They're overjoyed these people are coming to ask for their skin and their teeth and their fingernails. Well, this is kind of hard to understand, right? And it says again and again, when they give their fingernails and when the people take their heads or cut their skin off, they kneel before them and they say, please take it. I'm so happy. This is going to be so great that you're going to take this because I'm going to do you a little favor. I've been waiting to do you a favor. Here, take my skin. And they don't go like this. They don't say, ooh, ah, ooh, ah. They don't go like that. They go, when they take the fingernails off, they're joyous. They're relaxed. They say, here, take the next one. I painted it this morning before you came. When the people take these parts of their body, they're calm and relaxed and joyous

[25:41]

and loving. This isn't like, you know, you can take it. These people have got some kind of attainment, right? These are far out characters, these bodhisattvas. They have got patience down all the way to the tips of their fingers, to the tips of their hair. They are patient. They can take anything. So that if people need anything, no problem. Fingernails, sure. If they're a king, my empire, fine. I'll be your servant. No problem. Whatever people need, they give it joyously, calmly. So it's not, maybe you think about this, you could, this is amazing. Wow. This vow is to rejoice in the attainments of such creatures and Buddhas, which are even beyond that. These are just like the workers for Buddha, right? So, this, but also it is to rejoice in the infinitesimal merits and virtues of anything,

[26:50]

of beings in hell. Like if somebody in hell does a slightest favor for somebody else in hell, or if somebody in hell, when they eat a lash, if they just don't get angry at that time for a second, there's a little tiny merit there. There's a little tiny virtue. You rejoice in the tiniest ones and in the magnificent ones. All of them. And you never stop. So, that's the spirit of this rejoicing. And rejoicing is, you know, again, considered in Bodhisattva land, it's really this great, great practice called rejoicing in others. And you can also rejoice in yourself that comes along with it. But mostly you sort of concentrate on others because there's a lot more of their merits than yours. You know, everybody know what a kalpa is? Anybody that doesn't know what a kalpa is?

[27:55]

Well, I don't know what it is. But anyway, so these kalpas and eons and stuff. And then there's virtues and merits. Virtue and merit are a little bit different. They're slightly different English words. And so, usually when you see translations in English of virtue and merit, they're translating two Sanskrit words, which are guna and punya. Guna is usually translated as merit, I mean virtue. Guna means quality or a virtue of a person or of a person's practice. Virtue is actually quite a complicated word, especially if you look it up in a philosophical dictionary. But basically it means a quality, an excellent quality, particularly a spiritual quality. It means goodness. It's related to the Latin root virtus, which means manly or courageous or strong.

[29:02]

And it's related to words like, Sanskrit words like virya, which mean courageous effort and things like that. Negao wa kuwa kuno kudokuo, kudokuo, kudokuo is virtue. The virtues of religious practice. And then the slightly different word is merit. Merit means more value or excellence, or it also means an aspect of a person's character deserving approval or disapproval. It also means spiritual credit. Granted for good works. It also means good fortune. Muso means no marks. Fuku means merit or good fortune.

[30:04]

And den is a field and e is clothing. Literally it would be the clothing of the field of blessing or the field of good fortune, which has no marks. Muso, no mark, blessing field, clothing. So the field of merit is the Buddha, the field of his enlightenment and all the people who practice. So the virtue of these good qualities of people and also the merit is that when people do good things, there's some benefit for them and others in the situation. So we're not only working, the Bodhisattvas and Buddhas are working for the benefit of other people to save people from suffering, but also to clean the streams and make the

[31:13]

roads smoother and build bridges so that people don't have such a hard time crossing rivers and grow flowers and build lovely buildings and all the things you can do which make the world a healthier, more lovely, ecologically balanced thing too. Those are also merits. And those aren't exactly qualities of spiritual practice. So you work to help the world and to save sentient beings. So these two kinds of things you're rejoicing over. And oftentimes they come together, of course, if someone has a lot of virtue and builds a nice building or someone has a lot of virtue and cooks a good meal or grows a garden, plants a garden. Mark went up to San Francisco with me last time I went and when I gave a talk at Green

[32:15]

Gulch, I told myself, do not worry about Mark. Don't worry that he's heard this lecture before. Don't let this stop you from doing it over because everybody else hasn't heard it. So I gave the lecture that I gave here up there. Of course, it was a little different, but I was a little worried about repeating something to somebody that's already heard it, except that I know that it protects them from being jaded. So I'm not worried again to tell this story that I told when Mark was up there. And that is, it's a story about the fact that, I'll just tell the story and you can tell me what it's about. It's a story about Pablo Casals. Not Pablo Picasso or Pablo Neruda, but Casals, the cellist. So this young man, I forgot his name, I think he was a Polish cellist and he did a recital

[33:18]

for Pablo and of course, he was a little nervous playing in front of the great master and he didn't do a very good job, didn't exactly screw up, but he didn't do some of the stuff he really wanted to do for the teacher. You told us a story before. I told you before? You told us a year ago. Oh, sorry. Okay, all right. So anyway, he did the recital and he didn't think he did a very good job because he was kind of tense or something. And then Casals was just like, well, how was Casals, Brian? I was adjusting my zapper, I was getting so bored, I'm sorry. Anyway, Casals was very excited, exuberantly enthusiastic about what a wonderful recital the guy gave. I know what he said, write it up.

[34:18]

Oh, shut up. Let me do the punchline. So anyway, afterwards, the guy felt kind of funny, felt disappointed because here he was having a chance to perform in front of the master and get some real feedback on his performance and all he got was this exuberant praise for a sort of half-assed recital. It bothered him. And then I think maybe 10 years later, he met Casals again and he got a chance to do another recital. And again, Casals was very enthusiastic and praising him. And afterwards, he went up to him and said, well, thank you very much, sir. And I think he said something like, well, and that was a good recital too, by the way, you're right. But about 10 years ago, I gave a recital and you were really exuberant in your praise of me, but I felt funny because I kind of screwed up. And Casals got actually kind of angry with him. And said, I don't know the technical terms, but didn't you do this, you know, right?

[35:26]

And didn't you do that right? And didn't you approach this line, phrase that way? And didn't you do those things? He said, well, yes. I said, well, that was great. He said, I leave it to fools to criticize people. My job is to praise what's good. And you did some good things and I really liked that. And I said, well, when you're great like that, you can go around just praising people. But actually, everybody can do that. You don't have to be super great at something to praise people's merits. Even a stupid person can see people's merits. Everybody can see some merit, probably. But most people concentrate on people's faults. This is really foolish. So to see infinitesimal, to rejoice in infinitesimal. If I look at each person, I can definitely see at least infinitesimal merits in all these people.

[36:28]

Definitely. There's no problem. There's nobody who I don't see some infinitesimal merit in, really. Even my worst enemy has probably got more than infinitesimal amount of merit or virtue. And then to rejoice in that and forget about the errors or faults. That's his practice. And yeah, that's a practice. It's a real practice. Yes? Well, one is just, if you can find a tiny one, if you can find, but what, I'll just tell you,

[37:43]

this is, I'm telling you now, this is the answer, okay? If you can find a tiny virtue in anybody, then rejoice in that. If you can find a big, whatever virtues you can already find, then rejoice in them. So rejoicing in the merits will give you more energy and open your eyes more. The more you rejoice and the more you find, the more you find, the more you find, the more you see, the more you'll see. So the main practice is to do that practice, is to start doing it. And as you do it, you'll do it more and more. That's the main practice. Yes? Just work at looking for it. Is that a good thing or just look for it? Well, look for it, but also when you look for it, when you see it, rejoice in it. The rejoicing will then encourage you to look for it more because you'll feel, you'll not only find it, but you'll feel happy that you found it and rejoice in it. Then you'll be more likely to look again. That's one way to do it. But there's another way to do it. Now, did you want to say something? Well, I was just going to say, if you work on non-discrimination, then you can do this

[38:43]

practice better. If you can do this practice, you can do non-discrimination. This practice aids the practice of non-discrimination, and non-discrimination aids this practice. Also in the Platform Sutra, it says, if you are a person who truly practices the way, do not look at the ignorance in the world, for if you see the wrong of people in the world, you being wrong yourself will be evil. And what is it, Confucius says, if you see something good in people, emulate it. If you see some fault in somebody, look at yourself. So if you see something good, praise it. The best way, and one way to praise it is to try to be that way yourself.

[39:45]

Emulate it. That's one great way of praising it. With Suzuki Roshi, my great praise of him was to try to be like him. Okay, so praise and rejoice at the merits of others. And if you see faults in people, if your eye gets off the track and you somehow can't help but see a fault, then when you see the fault, then turn, don't deny the fault, just turn around and look at yourself. Because you probably haven't been doing the previous practice of confession and repentance thoroughly. If you do that more thoroughly, then when you look back out again, you probably again will see merit and virtue rather than faults. But again, if you see faults, don't deny that you see the fault, but see that you have made fault. You're off when you see faults. So turn around, okay, and look back here, and then go back out again. And if you see the merit, then don't just see it, rejoice in it.

[40:45]

Yes? So at this point, could you say something about the practice of talking to others, to having a problem with others, just into confession, repentance, and turning your view back on yourself. Talking to others? Yeah, about, you know, I have a, you know, there's somebody you have a problem with, and you're having difficulty with. Okay, yeah, all right. Did you have something? Yes, I just wanted to make a comment about when you said if you see a fault, then others turn and look at yourself. And the way that struck me is often when I see a fault in others, if I can think to try to look at myself, I realize that's a fault of mine. Yeah, that's what I said. I see in others my own faults. That's what you said, what the Sixth Ancestor says. If you see faults in others, then you're wrong. If you see virtues in others, you're right.

[41:47]

Buddha only sees virtues and merits in people. Buddha does not see anything wrong with anybody. If you see something wrong with somebody, you've got a problem. That's it. There's no exception to this in Buddha's Dharma. The enlightened ones see the merits of others, they don't see the problems of others. Now, in relation to what Brian is saying, I trained as a Zen monk now for more than 20 years, and so if you people do anything in the realm of Zen monkhood, you know, Zen forms, if you slightly deviate from certain expectations I have, I notice immediately. You know, if the bells are hit a little bit off, or if I get things off too, I notice them right away. If the lights are a little bit different than I'm used to liking them, if the, you know, anything off from what I think is most beautiful, I notice like that. In 10 directions and 3 times. Okay? But, when I notice those things, if I'm on, I don't think anybody did anything wrong.

[42:57]

I don't. I think, oh, now I have a chance to relate to somebody. So, these little things are ways to help people. They're not that people are doing things wrong. These Doans, you know, that are learning these Doan things, when they start out, the first half of the practice period, or sometimes the whole practice period, they just make all these behaviors that are different from the standard form. But, this is not, I do not, if I'm awake, if I'm in the right state of mind, I never see them making any wrong. I just see opportunities to relate to them. When I was a young monk, and Suzuki Roshi taught me things, I never, ever felt like I did anything wrong. And the more I practiced these priest forms, I felt like I was putting myself out where he could relate to me. You know?

[44:01]

I learned the chants, not to do them perfectly, but so that he could talk to me about the way I was chanting. It was, it's a media, it provides media for expedience. So, if you've got a problem with somebody, you think there's something wrong with them, the only reason to talk to them, Brian, is to tell them something about yourself, which is a great gift. So you should tell people about yourself, but you don't talk to other people about their faults. That's completely off. You tell other people about how they affect you. You're telling them not about your faults either, you're just telling them about yourself. You can say, for example, when you hit the bell the other day, that hurt me. The way you hit it. It was, it [...] was hit in such a way that I felt pain. But if you feel like you're criticizing them, there's something wrong with them when you say that, you shouldn't say that to them, because this is not correct.

[45:03]

You're just, you're just ramifying your own delusion. But to tell someone that they hurt you is good information, if you don't really feel like they did anything wrong. Like if Brian steps on my foot unconsciously, I don't think he did something wrong, but I'll tell him that he did it because he should know that he's stepping on my foot and that it hurts if it hurts. If it doesn't hurt, I might not tell him, but I still might tell him just because I want him to know that he is stepping on my foot and I think he doesn't know it. Now, do you have any questions about that, Brian? Does that make sense? That makes sense. So I really, sometimes, occasionally, when people do things a little bit different from the usual way, sometimes I get irritated, but I don't say anything then. I don't, I mean, I try not to say anything, because this is, if I say something from there, I'm saying something, I'm basically just compounding my delusion. But when people do something unusual and I see an opportunity to express my love for

[46:07]

them over this thing, then I feel great because here's a chance to do something good over this little thing that they're doing. Like that thing I was doing at work meeting the other day, you know, about the kihi. Right near the work meeting place there, moved over a little bit, like where the covered walkway is. So if I hadn't have done the kihi in the way I was doing it and deviated slightly from what he was thinking was another way to do it, he wouldn't have been able to tell me. So my behavior gave him a chance to relate to me. And I didn't feel criticized, I felt like this is just a great, great, great gift. So my practice with him was I kept putting my form in front of him all the time so he could see it and then he could comment on it. And I haven't always been able to follow that way of basically commenting on form as a gift, but that's the way I recommend. And if somebody's bothering you or hurts you, it's okay to tell them they hurt you.

[47:10]

As a matter of fact, it's a gift to tell them that they hurt you, but not because they did something wrong by hurting you. If you think they did something wrong, wait until you get rid of that idea. If you think they did something wrong, turn the thing back on yourself until you can see that all that happened really was that you got hurt and then you made a judgment. The judgment of their error is something that you need to work on. Your judgment is evil. But the fact that they hurt you, that's true and they probably should know. And you're telling them that they hurt you without any judgment against them is a gift. You're making yourself vulnerable to them. You're telling them they have power in your life. And also, if you tell them after you put aside and overcome your false impression, your own erroneous thinking, and you give it and they can feel that this is just kindness.

[48:14]

So that's what I think is a very good practice to do, both of those things. And that's not a case necessarily of rejoicing in the merits of others when you tell someone to hurt you. That's not necessarily rejoicing in the merits of others. It's rejoicing in their merits. But in a way, it's rejoicing in your own merit that you can be kind enough to go out of your way to tell someone the effect they had on you so that they can be more aware of their power in your life and other people's lives. Yes? Okay. I think it's terrific that you can notice all these deviations from your previous experience and not become irritated most of the time. In fact, I think that's so terrific that I don't know how that's possible. And so, I've become, I notice so much judgment in my daily practice that I sort of feel a

[49:20]

little bit like it's hopeless, that I can whittle and [...] I'll still have this. So that seems to be a feeling in addition to the judgment of a doubt again. Yeah. And I suppose there's no reason to stop whittling. What is the whittling? The whittling is the practice of not judging. No, it's not. I don't recommend that you practice not judging. I recommend that when you do judge, you turn it around. That's what I've, I haven't always been able to do this. When I was your age, how old are you? About 24. Yeah, when I was your age, I was a Doan, actually. And I was in the first group of Doans at Tassajara. And yeah, that was when I was a Doan, just when I was your age. And I wasn't, I was like, I was not, I was irritated with these things at that time.

[50:23]

But 20 years of turning it around has some effect. In 20 more years, probably, probably I, you know, I probably won't get angry at all anymore. I won't get irritated at all anymore. I'll just always feel joyous when somebody does me the kindness of showing me some way to relate to them. But 20 years is, you know, it has, you know, you can get into it a little bit. But I was, I was the same, same, I was irritated and judgmental about these things when I was, when I was 24. But what I guess I was saying to when I do turn it around, I just go, ugh. You know, I think it's really, it's so much worse, the fact that I'm judging. Yeah, well then that's right. Exactly. That's what I mean. That takes you back to the previous stage of then you're in repentance and, and, and resolution again. And then you say that poem, you know, and know that love forgives you. Love forgives you.

[51:27]

Love gave you the eyes to see this in the first place. You got to see this about yourself in order to be able to clean yourself up, in order to then be able to see how wonderful other people are. So again, this, this practice, if you have trouble doing this practice, then that sends you back to the previous practice that we've been doing, that you have to work more on confession and repentance. Either formally or just through the feel of pain of that kind of thing, you know, the pain of being petty. We don't like to be petty. We want to be magnanimous, right? Yeah, I just, and that's part of what a monastery is about. A monastery is to get it, is to get a taste of how petty you yourself are and to feel how terrible that is and then to forgive, be forgiven for it. And over the years, you'll gradually, your eyes will open up little by little to how

[52:32]

wonderful everybody is. Not everybody is the same. Some people have unbelievable, you know, blinding virtue. Other people have just a little bit compared to them. But a little bit is really beautiful. Sometimes it's really beautiful to see a little tiny bit of virtue in certain people. It's exquisite, you know, just to see this little jewel there in this, in this, uh, uh, this certain texture. Do you still have a question? Is it still there? It's still there, but I don't know if it's appropriate anymore. Okay. Yeah. I was just reading an interview with Jelena Macy where she talks about, it's in the Inquiring Mind, where she talks about the codependent origination and how our, our trying to be perfect is just a reflection of our belief in isolation and if we, as we can put our

[53:38]

faith more and more into his net, so to speak, then we can see how impossible it is for us to be perfect because we have to cut, we have to cut the net to be perfect. Or you can be perfect if you can see how wonderful other people are. Right, well it's the same. Yeah, right. To make me perfect first will never work. If I want to be perfect, I better start out here. Once I've got everybody else perfect, I'll be okay. In fact, the people who see, the people who see, are surrounded by perfect beings, they're pretty, they're pretty good. Buddha actually saw everybody was perfect, really did. I mean, not holding back at all, Buddha saw everybody was replete with all the wisdom and compassion and qualities and virtues, the wisdom and virtues of the Buddhas, Buddha saw that in everybody.

[54:38]

But Buddha also saw people don't, people don't believe that because of their attitudes, you know. So that's why this is a great practice. And if you slip, step back one step, do that one, if you can't do that one, step back, keep stepping back, pretty soon you'll wind up in the front of the practice that you couldn't do. Yes? Uh, I think I understand what you were saying about needing to develop the kind of energy that calls forth repentance, but I have to disagree that, um, that it's silly to, um, to do it if you don't have that energy. Uh, to do, to do what? To do, to do the practice of investing. When you don't have what energy? When you don't have the energy that will resolve, uh, bring back the deep repentance.

[55:40]

Maybe that was what you were saying. But I just wanted to say that I, uh, I have felt for myself that it's really important not to get stopped by my vision of myself as imperfect or, uh, or, well, I can't completely resolve this if I do it, uh, because what, what seems to happen is that if I continue to do these practices or, uh, for instance, continue to say the vows even if I don't quite believe them, uh, the more I say them, the more I say, yeah, oh yeah, uh, I understand what that means when I start to be able to do them. Yeah, so you're saying, uh, some people say actually, I, I remember one of my, again, when I was first starting practice, one of my playmates was a guy who had trouble saying

[56:43]

the vows because, I mean, he actually, I think, didn't say them because he couldn't, and as I've seen that a number of times, people do not say them because they say, well, I can't really do that. I can't really say vows, so I'm not going to say I'm going to. In that case, I would still recommend that you say so, that you say them anyway. Just like someone who says, well, I'm not going to say, uh, for example, uh, what is it, uh, a disciple of Buddha does not kill, and then you say, even after acquiring Buddhahood will you continue to follow this precept? And they say, well, I don't know if I will, so I'm not going to say yes. I think you should say yes. I mean, if you can say yes, say yes. I agree. And if you think, well, maybe I won't be able to, uh, so maybe I shouldn't say yes. I say, go ahead, say, if you can say yes, say it. Okay, so I think I agree with you, but there's a little twist there. Okay, the twist is that I'm saying to you, you're saying, you're hearing me say, don't

[57:47]

say, uh, blah-de-blah unless you really feel it. Okay, you think I'm saying that? All right. I'm saying it's silly to say you don't really feel it. Yes. Okay. But I'm not saying don't say it unless you really feel it. I'm saying, say it and really feel it. And I'm saying it's silly not to really feel it. So I say, say it. And when you say it, you say, I will not do any more evil. Say you won't. Definitely go ahead. And if you think, well, I won't be able to, that's a different thing. Put that aside. And when you say it, say, I won't do it and say, I'm not going to do it. Say I did it. I don't like it and I'm not going to do it. So I'm just, I'm not saying that you shouldn't say it. I'm saying you should say it. And I should, I'm saying you should say it with whole heart. And when you say the word, you should say with your whole heart. And if a part of you says, I'm not, I'm not wholehearted about it.

[58:49]

Put that aside and just talk about the part that's saying it wholeheartedly. That's what I'm saying. And some part of you is saying it wholeheartedly, right? I told that story about that German woman, Irmgard Schlegel. She's a German woman who went to Japan and practiced Zen. She also was really weird to bow. And she was bowing one time, I think she was bowing one time and she said to herself, I think this is ridiculous, but some, but somebody's bowing like hell. There's somebody who's, but if you don't say it, if you say, I'm not going to say the bow, then you don't say it. But if you say, I bow to save all sentient beings, somebody's actually saying that. Somebody's saying, I bow to save all sentient beings. I'm going to do that. Somebody's actually saying those words. Somebody else may say, oh, I don't know about that. Well, forget about that. Just concentrate on the one who actually is going to do it.

[59:52]

And that's not even a one, but concentrate on that spirit. That's all. That's not silly at all. What's silly is to let the feeling that you're not going to do it, or you can't do it, let that take over and stop you from appreciating your true nature. Okay. That's what I'm saying. I think that's what the Sixth Ancestor is saying too. You should be engaged in your own practice. Don't see right or wrong in others. If one is a true practicer of the way, one will not see false in others. In the world. That's Linji, tough Linji. One who practices steadfastness does not see false in the people everywhere. This is the steadfastness of your true nature. If people practice and cultivate imperturbability,

[60:55]

they ignore the mistakes and defects of others. Their nature is thus not perturbed. So when we see the false in others, we are perturbed. We feel upset. We feel bad. Okay. Well, I'd like to give one more lecture now. So make yourself comfortable. Lecture. I'd like to draw together here. This is right out of the same thing, but it's more in terms of Vijnaptimatrata Siddhi and Zen and stuff like that. And that is, the sixth ancestor of Zen said,

[62:02]

What is it in this teaching that we call a Zazen? Sitting. Sitting Zen. In this teaching, sitting means without any obstruction anywhere. Outwardly and under all circumstances, not to activate thoughts. Sitting means outwardly, wherever outwardly is, not to activate any thoughts. No thought activity of objects. No thought of objects.

[63:10]

No object of thought. That is what sitting means. Sitting means to have no object of thought. It means that in regard to outward things, like if I see Noreen, if I see Gail, these are outward things, right? When I see them, no thought is activated. That means no object of thought. It doesn't mean there's nothing out there. It means that when you see an object, that's it. There's no further activity. There's no object of thought. Meditation or Zen means that inwardly, to see your, to see the true nature and to not be confused. But of course, if you look inwardly,

[64:17]

and you see an object there, then your mind is not activated. Over the inner nature that you see either. You can make, you can turn inwardly into outwardly that way. So inwardly means again, not an object. Another translation, in this method to sit means to be free from all obstacles and externally not to allow thoughts to arise in the mind over the sphere of objects. To meditate means to realize the imperturbability of your original nature. Buddha said to one of his disciples, you must train yourself thus.

[65:20]

In the seen, in what you see, there will just be the seen. In the seen, there will just be the seen. In the heard, there will just be the heard. In the cognized, there would just be the cognized. In the reflected, there would just be the reflected. Do you see the same thing? In the scene there's just the scene. In other words, in the scene there's no thought activity that arises on that occasion, there's just the scene. Here is Buddha recommending that the practice of objectless awareness, no thought of objects or no objects of thought. And he explains a little bit. Now when in the scene there will be just the scene, and in the heard just the heard, and

[66:32]

in the cognized just the cognized, then you will not identify yourself with it. In other words, you see something and it's just a scene, you don't identify with it. But if there is a scene and then there's a thought that arises, some thought activity on the occasion of seeing, then you identify with it. But if there is just a scene when there's a scene, you will not identify it with yourself. When you do not identify yourself with it, you do not locate yourself in it. When you do not locate yourself in it, it follows that you will have no here or there or in between. And this would be the end of suffering. It's the Buddha. And Dogen Zenji says, the sound of the valley streams enters the ear, the light pierces

[67:38]

the eyes. Outside this, no thought. Buddha also said, when you approach the five skandhas, which means again, when you approach color, when you approach feeling, or of course, if color approaches you, or feeling approaches you, then color, feeling, conception, emotions, and consciousness are pots of misery. The five skandhas come at you or you go at the five skandhas, they are sources of misery. In other words, you see something and then your thought is to go at it or it comes at

[68:41]

you. There's further thought. But if there's no approach to these events, then these very events become bliss pots. If you don't approach the sound, it becomes a source of bliss. Not approaching the sound is the same as when you hear something outside, there's no thought in addition to that hearing. So Dogen Zenji says, you use the five skandhas. You use colors and sounds and thoughts and feelings. You use them, only them, to realize Buddha. So you do use your experience, but you never approach your experience and your experience never approaches you. It's just the experience. Yes? I'm thinking that when myriad things advance, that's it.

[69:42]

When myriad things advance and confirm themselves, that's it. It isn't that myriad things advance and confirm themselves and you go along with it, or they come to you then. Just things advancing forward and confirming themselves, just sounds being sounds, a sound happening, a sight happening, for all these things to happen, that's enlightenment. That's the end of suffering. It's not that you approach them, it's not that you identify with them, it's not that you locate yourself in them. You don't do that, and therefore that's the end of suffering. Yes? In the example of just hearing for this term, if we do that in lectures, how do we learn? I mean, if we're not thinking about what you're saying, questioning, is there still a living

[70:48]

process? I mean, is it going to be retained? Are you trying to just be empty? Don't try to be empty. Nobody said that's extra too. It isn't that you hear my voice and then you try to be empty. You hear my voice. That's what you do anyway. You always hear my voice when I talk, but just let it be that, and then don't do anything more. That's what's recommended. Don't try to be empty when you hear my voice, or don't try to stop your judgment when you hear my voice. Okay? Dogen Zenji, another translation of what Daijaku just said is, when, how do you put it, to witness and act from the advent of things is enlightenment. Okay?

[71:48]

So if I talk, that's the advent of something, of sound, you. Okay? To witness that sound, that's it. That's enlightenment. Just to witness that sound. In other words, for the sound to be the sound, that's enlightenment. That's the end of suffering. But it's interesting that he translated it as to witness and act from the advent of things. Okay? So, when I say, Boo, it's just Boo. And that's all that happens for you. Okay? You're there witnessing that advent, and you're acting from that advent. In other words, as soon as I say, Boo, you say, Hi! Or, I got a question. Or, let's take a walk. Or, shut up. You know? Point is, you don't just sit there like a log. Or, you do sit there like a log. And then, you're just log. And the next moment, who knows what you'll do. You'll do something. You might hear another sound. You might scratch your nose.

[72:50]

You might lift your eyebrows. A life flows from that. A life flows from sounds being just sounds and thoughts being just thoughts. You act from there. So, it's not that you don't do anything, you don't learn anything. You learn a lot. But, you learn from things being what they are, rather than you being separate from them and looking over there at them and getting all entangled in identification and location and attachment and all that. People act from that, too. But, acting from that is delusion and misery. But, to act from no objects of thought, or to act from the seen being the seen, or to act from the sound entering the ear, to act from there is enlightenment. You learn a lot. That's how you learn. You learn other ways, too. But, what you learn in those cases is not very helpful. You may be able to tell I believe this teaching.

[74:10]

I believe this is the teaching of Buddha. I believe this is the teaching of the sixth ancestor. I believe this is the teaching of Dogen Zenji. I believe this is the teaching of Suzuki Roshi. And, I also believe this is the teaching of George Herbert and Simone Weil. It's the teaching of enlightenment coming out all over the place. It's everywhere. It's in you, too. It's your teaching, too. It's what you're already doing. It's really the way you are. I believe it. And, the more I believe it, the more I practice it. And, the more I practice it, the more I believe it. And, I don't really believe it completely yet, because I don't really practice it completely yet. But, the more I practice it, the more I believe it. And, the more I believe it, the more I practice it, and so on. And, I believe it's the same for you. The more I see you practicing it, the happier you look, and the more inspired I am by you. And the less you practice it, the more I wonder what I'm doing.

[75:12]

I think, well, maybe I'm... Hey! I don't criticize you when you're not taking care of yourself as well as you could. I look at what I'm doing, if I'm inspiring you to do the right thing. Because when you don't take care of yourself, well, it hurts me, and then I think... I don't criticize you, but I think, well, I look at my own practice then. And you give me an opportunity to work on my practice. If you're taking care of yourself well, well, then I don't have to take care of my practice because I already am taking care of my practice, because I can see how wonderful you are. And, in fact, you're fine for the time being. It's not exactly a break, though, for me, because I get to do this other practice called saying yay. The practice of saying yay.

[76:18]

Saying, hey, yay, I'll keep it up. Hang in there. But if I see people hurting themselves, it does hurt me. If I see somebody gouging their flesh, it hurts me to see that. But then I think, well, now, what am I doing? How's my practice? That this person can gouge flesh right in my face. Maybe I say, if somebody's got it, I'll say, well, how's my practice? Flesh gouger. Well, that's pretty good. Pretty good. Like, you can do more better. And I'm going to keep gouging my flesh out until you get it together. It's true. People will keep suffering until you get it together. People will keep looking sad, and sadder and sadder until you get it together.

[77:23]

To see how wonderful they are, and then to use their sadness in such a way as to somehow say, well, actually, we do it this way. The way we're sad is actually we turn the lips like this a little bit more. Turn the lips like this. You take people's sadness as an opportunity to teach them more, but in a really interesting way. Not the really interesting way, but it's an opportunity to show your love. But you can't show your love if you think there's something wrong with them, because you're temporarily blinded to see if there's something wrong with them. So when you're blind, get your eyes back. When you've got them back, then you can go to work again. But we do get blind quite frequently, because thoughts are activated about external things.

[78:26]

We don't just let external things be external things. We don't just let the seen be the seen. So then the mind goes, and then we identify and get all tangled up and so on. So then we're helpless, and not helpless to ourselves and to others. So then we have to turn around, take the backwards step, and all that. So now we can have a little break and sit up here. Fifteen minute break. Thank you. BODO CHEN SETAN DANG

[79:36]

BODO CHEN SETAN DANG BUDDHA DOB KHYO SETAN KHYO MI TSA RANG NALAS AYA DRAGYA DEM DILIGYEN SVARGYA SVARGYA AYA DRAGYA DEM DHARMAYI SVARGYA NALAS AYA DRAGYA DEM BUDDHA'S WISH UNSUCCESSIBLE AYA DRAGYA DEM BUDDHA'S WISH UNSUCCESSIBLE

[80:31]

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