Training for the Selfless Heart 

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lol oh no

tonight i'd like to focus on the i'm what's called the sometimes to
the fourth perfection or the fourth par meta
where the fourth virgin virtue
at body sought as training to develop their selfless compassion
hi it's like on it's the sanskrit is maria
which is related to
the route viral
i'm into the work english word zero thank you and the router the remaining as the ball
the remaining is both you like exit the viewers bull
though like that the male hoc the mail cow
the mail whatever the mail cattle
male four legged old lines
i'm the emphasis is on strength for
maybe also little bit all of the female usually represents is a little bit of sense of
or anywhere in any way on
a german or energy
it has translated as an effort
endeavour enthusiasm zeal
ah heroic courageous effort
all these words trying to get at this sir
this great
the kind of the and power of all the bodhisattva virtues this this this energy this effort also translate his energy
this heroic energy is applied to the previous virtues and the following virtues
supplied it's it without this he wouldn't that there wouldn't really be practicing of giving
ethical discipline patience
body sought for concentration or wisdom so it it's in the fourth position but it
in it is necessary for the others
maybe it's in the fourth position because at this point you able to really get into it if you practice the previous three you can really fully get into this fourth perfection
it must have been involved somewhat in practicing the previous three
but also we need practice the previous three and a sense of the preparation for practicing this fourth one in it's nearly completely full sense of course it can't be really full until we realized the last two
buy chicken anymore you'll see
and before doing that i want to him to bring up two things one is that the instruction and i offered during meditation is actually an instruction which is the center of the next perfection the next virtue of the bodhisattvas
concentration practice
so next week i'll go more into that
concentration on
the mind of enlightenment the mind which wishes to live
for the greatest benefit for all beings
the other thing i wanted to bring up was a follow up on the question that came up at the end of class
a story that i was told by marilyn about
finding yourself in up
very challenging it
difficult meeting with someone
ah and feeling that this person was very upset with her
and even that this person who was wanting to and was attacking her
and feeling pain of this in this situation and send some stress
but trying in the midst of that
painful interaction trying to help the person he'd even so
trying to be helpful not thinking oh i think maybe but i'll do us all kind of
get rid of this person an attack back i didn't hear about that she'd managed to sort of not wish this person ill
he sounded like she was pretty successful in not wishing the person ill and even that finally or the person was helped
by the end of the interaction
at the person stopped attacking and even could
calm down
and even have at least some glimmering
that the marilyn did not feel ill will towards her and actually had helped her work through this
so it's kind of a or story and practicing patient practicing patience and not just patients but also practicing giving i would say
and also practicing ethical discipline because she was being careful
and and and trying to be helpful trying to give help and also being patient with the pain of the interaction
the pain of i would sound like being insulted or falsely accused in these kinds of things
but the problem she had was that she felt her afterwards kind of
wounded or wasted or something like that
and i said some things but when later i thought of some other examples of like you know that on
i'd like to think if you if you see someone drowning and you got to try to help them in the water they will often try to pull you down push you down under the water
almost intentionally in their fear they might actually pursuing the water or someone if someone's in some kind of hysterical fit and you try to help them
and you don't get angry with them but you actually try to help them and protect them they may punch you in the face on purpose
why are you trying to help them and then in the end maybe they are helped and they're grateful to you
but you still got wounded in the process of helping them
try to kill their children that you know they give their children their body their breast and the children bite them and they try not to sometimes they try not to hate the children from biting
and sometimes are successful and they don't hate the child
and the child feels that patients but they're still wounded
by the attack
so it's not it's not just that when you're helping people and they're attacking you are you trying to help them in there and they're attacking you and then finally they feel that compassion and they're converted from their ill will and their hysteria but you sometimes get hurt in the process
so yet to be patient with the attack
not when do we have to learn this but still doesn't mean that we won't get hurt and then we have to be them we can be patient with the injury that we get in the process of helping people
and as many other stories about this but i think that that that's part and that's why we need patience not only with the attacks but the effects of the attack
because sometimes people are trying to attack us and it doesn't we don't really feel much pain that we can see they're trying to hurt us but it doesn't necessarily hurt
sometimes we can see that they're trying to insult us but it doesn't really hurt like i sometimes just use the example of if someone tells me i'm a terrible piano player doesn't really bother me that much
he would be better to say that i was a terrible
zen priest or something they'll be more likely to hit something
but if see people in salt things about know where i have no investment if it really it may not really hurt i may not feel attacked i could tell they're trying to but they're not scoring any
and i told this story i think before but comes up again here that
my daughter used to say to me you know i hate you and as i think she called me some names and something like call me a bomb in on call me some stuff over a number of years and i i wasn't very skillful are in but in fact i
did not feel hurt by her attacks and i
i could have just quietly listening to her but i often would laugh when this person who i really felt really love me
an adored me was saying that she hated me
and a person who actually really respected me who said she didn't respect me and i'm kind of sorry that i did laugh at her because that really got kind of hurt her i think
cause she was trying to get she was trying to get me wasn't essay trying to hurt me she was trying to get me she was trying to touch me in some way
the and benches she saw me as this big thing you know she wanted to feel like she could get to this that he could affect this big thing
this great father
and she was quite hold actually maybe be almost i think a teenager when she finally me
and she was gratified when she finally gotten me
i don't know how gratified she was but she was also somewhat gratified that
part of the way she got me was i didn't laugh kind of stop me in my tracks
and i didn't retaliate but i i did sort of like conveyed or her not intentionally in a way but just by the fact that i was stopped sort of dead in my tracks she can see that she got me
she could see that she reached me and affected me yeah none
yeah in a way that like would stop me you know it would change me she could see me change in a way and that was a great moment
that she felt that she could reach me so in a way you know when people a people insulting they don't get to you in some ways
ah there's not as much an opportunity to connect as if they insult you and it hurts and then you'd really accept that and and your acceptance is like a big it's your it's a big act you know it's like you're not doing anything else
we all you ours is sort of like the main thing is going on now is your registering with this person house
done to reach you and they saw as a real connection there anna yeah a real meeting even though it's could be a little or very painful it wasn't super painful it wasn't really painful it was is painful enough for me to be kind of
like stopped and there was no like laughing or line no sense of how funny it is that she was trying to hurt me
there wasn't any of that and she and that's what she was looking for for years so i bought him her her becoming more accurate and finding something that wasn't things said just to get just to hurt me but was being said to try to tell me something
you know when she said i hate you
i wasn't skillful enough to try to find out what do you mean by that what are you trying to get out by i hate you
i just i was so funny that she that she would say that because i didn't believe it a conflict can make a joke
but i i could have said what he had to tell me
by that and she might have another tell me years before but i
but this time i could stop is it
and tell me more about that are what are you trying to get up
and i wasn't the least bit angry with her for this
education that she was giving me about about how she felt about something that we were joy i felt grateful to her
and she felt all that and her mother i was witnessing golfing and her mother was a
very happy for us to
so if it doesn't hurt sometimes there isn't maybe not as much of a connection
and buddha's really do what buddhas and bodhisattvas are in a path of really connecting with people and one of the ways we connect is that dumb yeah
is that people kind of have to criticizes or something on tell us some big probably have with us and we have to learn to
feel that or recognize what the feeling of their and
and and not not
the ungrateful
i don't know if we can go on to the from here but i'd like to now go back to the effort
now and then
again mentioned that the principal here that's being applied in this presentation is
the virtue that follows depends on the preceding one
so this practice of effort or zeal or diligence depends on the practice of patients
which connects to the is the stories were just talking about
being patient we can
receive hum
having ill will towards what harms us
and also being patient
we can see suffering as you can say a path
or as part of the path to buddhahood
by practicing patience we can see the suffering that arises in in relationship to others but also just in terms of our own efforts we can see suffering as a path
of or to buddhahood
so that second part of patience is very
important in the practice of effort because sometimes effort is really
ha really hard really difficult
not only the
the people insult us and they were trying to practice will want a we we now wishing to practice patience but patients helps us
be enthusiastic about practicing patience when were hurt
but also patients helps us be enthusiastic when we're doing something that's really hard just that really hard work
patients helps us be enthusiastic when it's time to give a really big gift
which we weren't able to give before and now we're developing this enthusiasm to such a point
there will be able to give greater and greater gifts and sometimes giving the great gift is difficult
so knowing how to be patient with difficulty will help us be enthusiastic about great about other virtues that are difficult
and just looking back
practicing giving helps us be not attached
which makes with support their practice of being careful
and vigilant sometimes we were doing things where you know we have things to do we're busy sometimes we are because we're attached to these things we have to do we sometimes aren't careful this is really important i don't have time to be careful gotta get it done
this is really you know important i do not have time to be careful i just gotta do it i've gotta finish it by such as at a time i do not have the luxury of being a bodhisattva
so i can't do this and be careful
so i'm attached to doing this thing and getting it done so i'm not really practicing generosity fully so then i'm not careful or i'm too busy to be vigilant and watch what's going on with me while i'm doing things
again generosity makes it so that when we're doing good things he has as good to do good things that's good but it's also good to be vigilant while you're doing it because you can give people gifts and not be vigilant
you can give people gifts and not be careful but if you're really practicing given that will help you be careful when you're giving gifts and be vigilant about what you're up to when you're giving gifts and with this kind of vigilance and carefulness than we can practice patience and by practicing patience now
will be more ready to practice
enthusiastic practice of all the other virtues
including this virtue
so the basic definition of this virtue is
feeling joy
about practicing
wholesome action
feeling joy in practicing virtue feeling joy in practicing what is meritorious
so it it's actually more emphasizing
the feeling of joy and practicing these things these virtues it's not so much the practicing in the virtues but sometimes the virtues are called diligence some of the things we do with this joy they are called diligence where they are called enthusiasm
because they have the spirit in them a joy and do in practicing them
so that's the basic definition
then right away what i'm supposed to them
what as opposed to them is called in actually is the summary
named summary word is laziness
and it's laziness has different aspects
and as it there
or maybe not cotton be better not call it laziness many were there are opposing factors and one of them kind of applies with all the other one is called laziness and the the sanskrit word for laziness is a
which means i'm
not to make use of

so the basic thing here are are practicing effort is joy and practicing virtue and so the basic laziness is to not have joy and practicing virtue to not feel to not really want to practice virtues like like virtue
i'm not interested
i want to
i mean you know i'm not actually not interested i don't care about virtue
i don't feel the desire to practice giving and and
carefulness and vigilance and patience i i made in one hour practice calm meditation and cannot practise cat concentration on the welfare of others i don't care about wisdom that kind of attitude is that or even love a softer than that like i don't feel like it
ha ha to turn off some kind of miles disinterest and we lack of wishing to practice virtue failing to want to practice it
that could be called laziness or and sometimes it's fundamental to the next one is
being distracted
by negative actions
or being attracted
to negative action
being attracted
to on wholesomeness
like actually wanting to be have ill will toward someone and actually feeling and feeling good about it i think it's really quite cool to call up the congress people who and wish them ill
or whatever
he would need to lie right now or to exaggerate
to such a point to entertain people even though the exaggeration is actually could be called a lie and i'd like to do it sounds fun
and might actually be a nice distraction from my suffering to while it's going on there so anyway that's a second one first is not to be interested next is actually attracted to and distracted from from from the point of view of being
have already sought by you're distracted by unwholesome activity
and the next one is a
despising oneself out of despondency or self depreciation and defeatism like
ah you know this bodhisattva thing is a well let's just put it this way for now that is just i i am i'm a sinner and a sister much for me i never would be able to do these practices
couldn't do the practices plus it i never could attain enlightenment
i never could make
a gift of my life for the sake of realizing buddhahood that's like just too much
to the point that i really say i'm not interested
or even it's stupid to talk about such things
but a little bit more like a first of all it's like actually it is too much from me and people do sometimes come and tell me you know that they're not interested in living for the welfare of others and is it okay if they stay at zen center keep practicing and i say yeah it's fine
you can be a dancer even know you
do not wish to realize buddhahood for the welfare of all beings even if you don't have that spirit you can still be a sensor
but i must say i'm never going to bring us up again in your presence
you know and i'm not i'm not bringing this up took to harass you who says you're not interested in it i'm bringing it up because i like to bring it up and as lot of people who actually do i'm going to bring it up because they want encouragement and practicing what you're not interested in that you want to stay here and here are some people
talk about the solid time you're welcome to stay and i actually not all the time where are quiet quite a bit of time see you can have some quiet periods where nobody's telling you about this bodhisattva path it's okay
and actually you can avoid the talks were we bring it up if you want to
deep in my heart i know this person is gonna become a buddha so i'm not too i'm not actually worried about it so they can go and say can i be a half hearted per bodhisattva for a few more yards
sure definitely you are welcome
and if you think what i'm talking about a stupid you're welcome to tell me about it because
that gives me an opportunity to practice patience thank you
and practice generosity by really supporting you to be who you are
when other aspects of this lazy
in as haram
undo pleasure
in the taste of idleness undo pleasure or yeah but attachment attachment to
the pleasant taste of idleness
oh there's a very lovely book a book i like very much i think it's called essays in idleness or something like that
and it's book of poetry which which are written by somebody who made quite a bit of effort to write these poems
you know and he made considerable effort to go into his little hut in own and right these poems about idleness
but so sometimes i don't know start our indolence does feel good is sometimes the as pleasant especially after been working hard
the rest sometimes when you've been working hard
like to climb a mountain and then walk across the top of it you know sort of on a horizontal surface when you make this effort to get up there and things like no effort and sometimes you like ah this is really wonderful up here really tastes good after this great effort to just be
walking across the top
but it's the undo with the attachment to the pleasure of the on the idleness after big effort or after even not much effort idleness can be pleasant even when you've been idled leave him for quite awhile
it's the attachment to it that's laziness it's like you know the body starts to climb the mountain and then at dinner and they breed the they drag fifty people up the hill with them you know
and they get to the top and it's like easy for a while and it feels almost like indolence and it feels pleasant and then you say the bodhisattva
can we go up another steep cliff non they say yeah the scope they also acknowledged can we have a little bit more
or lot more it's the attachment as the undo undo not due to you pleasure of the indolence that interferes with his heroic endeavor
another one is another one is another one is
not feeling
about the suffering of samsara not feeling sorrow over the suffering us the repeated suffering but he sought this do not feel sorrow over the difficulty her body surface
called the that people who were making efforts for the welfare of others
they don't feel sorrow without difficulty said clear they see people helping people they see people having hard time they see maryland trying to help this person having a hard time
don't feel sorrow about that they sympathize with that she's having a hard time but they feel like
very good they're happy to see somebody making a difficult effort for the welfare of others
but to see people suffering
out of self clean
in spinning around that self clinging thing and call it is agonizing itself gideon yeah that they feel sorry about
and that kind of lack that kind of numbness or indifference to the suffering of endless self concern
that feeling neutral about that are not let know that having been untouched by that and not feeling sad about that
that's kind of laziness that again interferes with
practicing virtue when you see someone
suffering and practice that virtue for them so those the laziness is
and then right away or after introduced to the laziness is the m
the indians sage poet shanti deva
just spent quite a bit of time encouraging the practice of meditation on impermanence
doesn't exactly encourage the practice of impermanence that does need any encouragement
he practices meditation on impermanence
ah at zen center most people are except that it's part of the deal in in then to meditate on impermanence that is part of the deal to reflect on and be mindful
we don't necessarily remember it all the time but most people are not our kind of what he called their down on third down with that that we
ah we live in a culture that's big on being mindful of death and the reason why we're mindful of death is to keep us
ready to practice virtue being aware of desk helps us be sober
and helps us encourages us to practice virtue
and encourages us to make effort in practicing virtue
so when we meditate on death meditate on death reflect on death be mindful of death than we kind of
know referring to ourselves we think
since i'm going to be around on a little while longer it would probably be a big mistake to not practice virtue with what little time i have left
let's joyfully make efforts to practice virtue since we're not going to be around long

and then not the
in terms of like
meeting any sense of you know the sport this this path of virtue this path of
living for the welfare of others this path of realizing supreme awakening in order could see this path of realizing supreme awakening in order to help others in the most effective way which could also just say is the path of wishing to help others in the most effective way
that includes the supreme awakening
so this path is just too much for me
design in are just a poor ordinary human being
and then there's various teachings of buddha who's who says stuff like
ah you know
even mosquitos
house flies bees
an atlanta other animals like this if they persevere
in the practice of virtue they will become buddha the buddha teaches them
and people might say well actually i can see how these might become buddhas they're really cool
as and also i think some people to see what else they're very selfless i can see already become buddhas and i would add to the list fun guy
they're very they're very much like bodhisattvas their life but not me
now the buddhist as hall all living beings if they make
diligent effort in practicing virtue they will become buddhas
and then again there is a his time maybe to emphasize again that the
the behavior of the buddha's
i should say the behavior a bodhisattvas who have become buddhas
in the life
a buddhist prior to becoming buddha their life his body surface
they did various practices which were difficult for them
so if we aspire to be booed as part of the deal is we we would aspire to learn the teachings about what practices buddhists have done
and then we would hear those teachings we say i would like to practice the practices the bulls have done
except now that i hear them i don't know if i can because they seem so difficult some of the practices of buddha's have done
so this is a tricky of tricky point
if you actually hear about some of the practices that buddhists have done you might think
i can't do that
and and it may be true that you can't do it now
so for example in the practice of giving
i i i use this example at green gulch if you feel like you can't practice giving it all

might just take something and put it in your left hand and then pass it to your right hand
and then pass it back for your right hand to your left hand and as do that for a while until you can get the feeling of of giving you know it can be something valuable to you know take one of your most valuable possessions and passage when your right your left-hand
he just keep doing everyone pretty soon you can pass to friend
and then if he passed if you get if you give him he might keep it for while but then you might pass it back to you
and then we could also start practicing you know giving people some herbs or something
or give people some leaves like sometimes people the
give me especially at in autumn they send me you know fallen leaves in letters
and also to if the letter taste with that letter tastes quite awhile to get me get to me oftentimes the color is gone from the leave but i know that when they put it in probably was very pretty
and a with all i wanna give this leaf to him this beautiful yellow her
orange leaf or red leaf
and by the time it gets him it might be brown or gray butter
and even now i wish to give this
and by by doing this practice of giving over and over we gradually come to a place where we can give
i flesh give her body
buddha's sometimes are asked for their bodies parts of their body and they give them
i just know that the buddha's but the the children of buddha do that and by being willing to give whatever is beneficial and being able to do so
when becomes a buddha
or put the buddha body is realized
visit the body gets transformed by the practice of being able to give the body however at the beginning we're not ready to do that
most of us
ha i am
the kind of suffering that people go through
when them when they're kind of their top agenda
is benefiting themselves
the kind of suffering that people go through when they're kind of concerned
pretty much first of all for themselves and what they and what is there's like their friends and their family
that kind of suffering is
i was saved from the point of view of the body sought but that kind of suffering is really terrible that's really horrible suffering the suffering that comes from self concern is
is really horrible
that's why we that's why the body outfit
try not to be ah to add ease with that suffering
they try to be calm with it and gentle with it and patient with it but it is really it is very very that's very variant intense and terrible suffering the suffering of cyclic existence of self concern is it goes on it has been going on
and without changing the modus operandi here it will continue it's really terrible
but the suffering that one encounters when one's living for the welfare of others
although the some in some sense of pain may be at a given moment kind of like the pain that someone else is feeling it's really ah it's really just something to be patient with and it's not really a problem for the bodhisattva because
it's pain under the circumstances of making effort for others
and it's not it is relatively speech he is circumscribed it's not endless
is it is limited it's still big really big but compared to the suffering
that comes with self concern that has that has know that there's no boundary on that
because the only way to put a boundary on it is to change
the perspective in the motivation once the motivation changed the suffering is bounded and infused with joy
because of what you're doing in that realm of suffering

the bird the pain of childbirth
if the mother is primarily concerned for her own welfare when she's having the baby than she's in this terrible kind of suffering but if she's if she's suffering and she's focused on the welfare of the baby although the suffering as intense it's also a joy
the path of the bodhisattva
is hard but it's relatively comfortable compared to the path of self concern
and the hardest thing about it is not the pain of it
but doing the practice wholeheartedly that's the hardest thing the hardest thing is to be
fully mindful that's really hard
the hard thing is to be completely yourself that's really hard but it's also pretty comfortable relatively speaking because is infused with
the joy of practice and in order to do it that fully you have to be joyful about doing a practice
so here you can see the close relationship between patients and this strange enthusiasm of the bodhisattva
and this is another stitches here's a statement which is kind of shocking
speaking about bodhisattvas who are really into the practice
a shanty davis' their bodies are happy due to their practice of virtue and their minds are happy due to the practice of wisdom
even if they remain in cyclic existence for the sake of others why would these compassionate ones be ever be upset
another way of saying it is by the merit of giving an ethics and patience and so on
the but they have they they have are they have a sense of physical wellbeing
and because they realize selflessness
their minds are in bliss
even if they're in some which means in samsara there they have a body which gets old
which has you know illness diseases
because there is some sour their dude they're the they're going through the same stuff that the other people are going through however because they're practicing virtue while their bodies deteriorating they have a sense of physical well-being while the in their disease
which again is very encouraging to the people and that's why there is to encourage others to say i've got disease something like yours and i have a sense of physical well being even though they say i'm sick
and i don't argue with them i'm just saying i have also have a sense of wellbeing
say what about it they're insane would they have would they also have mental bliss and i would say
ah yes
that if they're insane and realized emptiness in their insanity
there was if there was dead wisdom and their insanity they would be blissful
and they would go into insanity that if people needed him to go into it were one night shirt shortly after i moved into zen center over in japantown and ninety sixty eight
yeah i read this book about theresa
then students who took their teacher to the
insane asylum
i thought well how can
how can how have an exam have to go crazy
and then and then hop and then when the students take their teacher to the
to the insane asylum are they still the teachers students are they say what we used to be his student but we're not a student at this new crazy person
i wondered about that
and then it here's another shocker
by the power of this body mind of this mine of enlightenment by the power of the wish
to live for the welfare of others
by the power of the wish to realize buddhahood for the welfare of others
the body starts that consumes his previous evils
the harvest of the ocean of merit

so bodhisattvas do practice ethics
that's part of their practice that they practice being careful they're committed to being very careful about everything they do and to be vigilant about everything they do including practicing virtue they don't just practice virtues and well i'm practicing virtuous on to be careful
now they are careful the art vigilant
however they have a history like everybody else everybody's on his evolutionary path you know long evolution leading up now to this practice of bodhisattva
and the the this wish
this body mind consumes it doesn't negate
it doesn't stop the results
of past karma it embraces them and eat them up
and the consequences of them are that the the past the consequences of past action the consequences are now that they become food for this great heart of compassion that's their consequence they do have consequence the teaching of the buddha is not denied the karma has consequence is
just that this is the way if this is a consequence for these bodhisattvas
now the next big phase of this teaching about asper about the heroic effort by diligence is to talk about the five the for me
main factors in developing it and then two additional
helping practices and these for are
steadfastness joy and rest
rest or relinquishment those are the four factors
and i underestimated
the amount of time
that would be involved in getting to these for i thought i'd be able to do this for tonight
but if i do i'm afraid that they'll be no time for discussion so i think neighbor has to bring up next week for this for our but i would just say
briefly what they are is the first aspiration
aspiration means
to aspire
or be intensely interested in the teachings of the borders
which means to aspire
to the practice of virtue and wisdom
in brief
i popped to go into more detail with their on the later next comes steadfastness
which is closely related to
when he caught not getting into the laziness of thinking
that you can't do this practice
to develop steadfastness is he is a kind of self confidence
that goes with his heroic effort or this zeal
i guess i would like to
talk to about that more to and the last one which is very similar to the basic definition
is joy
which is basically
to just think about
how wonderful it would be to do these virtues to think about how wonderful good is not getting into whether you can do it or not that's the previous one
but just to think about are good good as and do and to think about it and think about it and until you're filled with a great joy at the prospect of doing it
and the last one rest means
don't don't when you're doing something and you're doing it well
and you've done it long enough to stop
ah or when you're doing something and you're starting to kind of lose it getting fatigued stop
it also means don't try to do something this to advance like don't try to give your body away before you're ready
and i yeah
in an ender
yeah that's basically it
rest and interest i liked him for me i like to emphasize that and this rest is related to the earlier one of not taking undue
undo pleasure in indolence
so don't take undue pleasure in resting
and also when you do rest without taking undue pleasure in it rest
as an act of virtue rest for the welfare of all beings rest so rest and really look at what you're doing and really rest so you can perform these heroic deeds
rest with the intention of i wish to live for the welfare of all beings and now i wish to rest so i can live for the welfare of all beings
maybe told you this example before my grandson doesn't do this with me anymore so much but when he is little
and he was like
don't like on me all the time now has other friends at green to play with
when i was just meet in him and i sometimes would have trouble keeping up with them and i would say just let me take up five or ten minute nap
and i'll be able to play with you better if you let me do it is not a no just five minutes non-owner are really will be able to be more fun of it you know how be able to be more with you and i know and i finally okay
i to take a long nap and come back and he you you are more no more it's good so he now he let me take he let me take naps

i got a better on eleven he goes river eight thirty source cut in on i get but for and he gets up at seven sauce
it just sort of have an advantage to besides being younger anyway
i really look at myself when i'm taking naps and i do take naps for the welfare of all beings
and i i do try to go to sleep at night for the welfare of all beings i that's not a break resting is not break time for bodhisattvas is the practice it's part of heroic effort is to rest but also sometimes you're doing something and you're doing it well and that's for
fine but you kind of want to keep doing it
because you're good at it but actually is enough you can stop
you didn't didn't get enough of that maybe it's not time for you'd take another do something else
don't overwork so i lifted over work is a kind of laziness over work is a kind of undue attachment to indolence
you get in a group sometimes it's actually you're being indolent
so those are the for and then one more big one i'd like to just say this is a big deal this is not one of the for is just another point which is
it's related a similar to
the resting in the form of don't take on something to advanced
unless you have a teacher a bodhisattva preceptor you probably shouldn't you know donate body parts without consulting with your teacher and or your your your spouse
and children or parents
but particularly in a few doing those bodies outback you should have a teacher to to see if a teacher agrees that you're ready to donate body parts even if it's something more conventional like one of your kidneys
which people are doing now quite regularly
ah for there's for their siblings and stuff but even that you should consider maybe
and as other kinds of gifts which might be helpful the people which would be good to give but only if you can really
go joy in it
and not regret it it's very bad to make donations and then regretted his pride better get again not to give and then resent
to not give than to given reset
general in on this path the boys up a path better to not give them to given resent not to mention given hit
you forced me to do that i hate you plus i'm taking it back even though it's ridiculous to take it back because i can't get it back
so the principal here which is another tough one i'm just give it to you you can
consider it we can talk about more next week maybe
before you make a gift part of the joy of giving his to think about
if you're actually currently able to give
and follow through
and if you don't if you feel like you're not able to give and follow through
again it's time to rest
give it a rest or put it aside for a little while
i'd better do that then to give it and the process of doing something good
ginger mine and try to take it back
aside from the fact that you know it can be very disastrous like again if you try to change in the middle of donating some body part that would be a big mess
but in sometimes even worse
is to get in a habit to set the precedent of starting to do something good and then quitting in the middle
that's that's a very that can have very harmful effects on the practice
to start doing something credit and not fall through
and i think a lot of people have trouble with us when it comes time to receive bodhisattva precepts they think
well if i can follow through on these maybe i shouldn't try and the first place
but that's a little different to make a vow to practice the precepts is one thing but to come to a specific act
i'm doing a specific example
the rather than the general commitment to practice virtue a specific act of virtue that's where i would say that this is talking about to look at that particular one and see if you can follow through on that one and if you can't on this one may maybe better not to do try it and wait until you feel like i think this time i can
this example now today right now i think i can do this
might be wrong
but it's good to start that way so
excuse me for talking so much
but then
appreciate you listening to this and charlie

excitement and fun
how do they relate to excitement
if there's some way that if if there's some way that the word excitement is a virtue to you tell me about it

yeah so briefly when you when you give gifts
it's when you really get into it and your and especially if you're giving gifts without expectation of reward
you will be assailed by great joy
and it's possible the inner joy
that you won't be careful
like that day i don't remember that i shouldn't i should memorize is more carefully but the is a yeats poem which goes
once there was a maid at once there was a mermaid who found herself a sailor boy she hugged his body to her body
and in her joy in her joy she plunged down into the water she forgot
that sailors
one mermaids
so it's possible with this joy to you actually do to do something harmful that's why the the the joy of giving is followed by be careful now are you being careful with this gift i've noticed myself that even even adults or say i'm
so excited about this thing and they are you excited and are you know being as an precisely know
i'm happy about it but not excited and posted and forced to be calm right
so when they say are you excited i say i'm happy or you are you excited to see this person that person i say i'm how i feel joy at the prospect
but i feel like it's my responsibility enjoy to also be centered mindful careful
and com
but if we mean enthusiasms i feel enthusiasm at this prospect
and then help you said you feel to yeah about this you feel zeal about the thirty fields
diligence about this indulgence also has the root of to delight or to like
the delicate ethic diligence is related to delicatessen
so he either and we and we have this chat which got you know talking about the the awareness of the jewel of the jewel mirror use the old translation said if you're excited it becomes a pitfall
so if you're practicing giving you get too excited a virtue the virtue of giving can become a pitfall
even the truth if you get excited about it the truth isn't a pitfall but it's the excitement around the truth can become a pitfall
now of course if you hesitate as a problem too
and they say it's like it's like
turning touching
touching these practices grasping them especially wisdom grasping it is wrong and turning away is wrong because it's like a massive fire a great mass of fire if you turn away from these virtues your freeze
but if you grab em you'll get burned
so how can we be mindful of them stay close to them without grasping are forgetting
so yeah meditation hot we we are totally devoted to it but we don't grab it
we don't grab anything but we also don't turn away from anything
and that is the meditation and you can be enthused about that and com at the same time afterward
ah yes i think yes it was nancy and then bill


it doesn't bring them joy
well ok here so you're you're you're offering year description of your practice it sounds like there's a little bit of expectation that when you give gifts
it will help
so that's not the giving here
when what you do when
i do the same thing you do
and i watched to see if i have any eggs any expectation if i see any expectation i say
on my part and i go already i love you but you you're not doing the practice properly
you're expecting something from this gift and when you expect something from the gift the get the gift is not going to is not as beneficial to them if somewhat beneficial but the main benefit of giving a gift some to someone is to given in such a way that they can feel on some level that you have no expectation that they're gonna that the object
that you're going to be rewarded by them feeling better
and the people can on some level especially children vis-a-vis their parents when their parents give them helpful things they can feel if the some expectation on the side of the giver that the child will be helped by what to give
and if they do the basically we're just repeating the same pattern of trying to get something out of life
so we need to learn to give
something wholesome like i find this helpful i like to give this to you and i have no and that's it but in my heart i'm looking to see to i have an expectation this will be helpful
i i think it might be i hope it will be and i have no expectation no attachment i've been getting a reward that it helps him
and i'm suggesting to you and to me that if we given that way that will be actually more beneficial than the other way of giving
and then sometimes you give the other way in the person gives you a reward
this is why i feel so much better
which is fine of course
and then you might have another gift to give them and say you know when i gave that to you and you feel better i also was i had some expectation that i would get rewarded by what you're giving me
and i'm giving another gift which is my confession of the impurity of my of my giving my giving was good and i'm glad it helped you but it had this defiling thing of me trying to get something and that's another gift i'm giving to you and this one i give to you without expecting anything and the person may notch and then they may not give you a reward
learn how have you have just implanted the spirit of enlightenment in them and it will make sure
you walk bill

is it possible
the proposal here is yes
it's yeah it's much easier said than done
almost always easier said than done except for once in awhile it's easy to do it than to say it
once in awhile but it's do there's there's many examples of zen where the the teacher takes the students who are in the quiet monastery and they're able to be present and centered in the monastery you know and they'd take them into the marketplace
move through the marketplace and then watched to see and have them watch themselves to see if they're able to continue to be as mindful and centered in the hurly burly as they are in the quiet mountains and oftentimes the answer is no
so when an early stories i've read about zen was this young man who trained for quite a few years with his teacher if teacher said i have nothing more to teach you
bye bye and student went down into the capital of kyoto and start hanging around with the beautiful people
and he noticed that he couldn't he couldn't continue his practice couldn't continue as mindfulness
it could continue this practice were talking about here and i went back and studies six more years
and then he went back and he was able to be in the city with all its
amazing events
and could do the entity do these practices but it takes a lot of training and a lot testing and finding out there were not there were not able to do it and the more training and testing back and forth
but that's the that's the aspiration of the opposite of the training is that will be was extended into all rounds
it just comes to mind is a
news a christmas carol and i think it's the i think it's the the ghost of christmas future who takes scrooge to visit
all these different areas of suffering and and the ghost of christmas future says i go into all realms of wool the bodhisattva vows to go into all the realms of of excitement and depression and fear and turbulence to go in there
because of practicing these things have a sense of ease and and an and and happiness and then to transmit these practices and all these realms that's the aspiration
the outrageous aspiration of the body surface
so next week cause to talk a little bit more about ah vigilance i mean none diligence and then more into of
the bodhisattvas concentration on the mind of enlightenment
and then we have one more meeting after that right
for us to realize perfect wisdom
thank you very much
and if we don't finish hopefully will live a little longer

thank you very much
that hit the spot
didn't they don't we take